Heero's Tears
by Ryoko21
Summary: Heero, a slave under Lord J, finds a creature in the woods and gets more than he barganed for. Yaoi. Finished.
1. Prologue

Prologue

The distant future is not what most would expect. Instead of an advanced civilization, most of the planet is covered in a medieval society. An eon of wars and natural disasters have wiped out the civilization as it is today, annihilating all buildings, roads, and man-made structures. All the weapons have been used in battles until they nearly fell apart; the natural upheavals quickly destroyed what was left. Hundreds of wars have scattered the technology and only fragments of useful information have survived. These fragments have been used to create things like levi-ships, plumbing, and agriculture. Weapons, communication, and travel technologies remain in their most primal forms. The worst change, or possibly the best depending on perspective, is the mutations that have arisen due to chemical and nuclear warfare. Though mother nature has finally been able to balance the environment so these pollutants are no longer wreaking havoc, the effects of these contaminants have permanently altered many species, including humans. From the mistakes of the past has arisen many new races, including demons, winged humans with a sharp, scorpion-like tail, werewolves and other werebeasts, humans prone to changing fully or partially into an animal form and swayed by the changes of the moon, sorcerers, humans able to weild and control the very fabrics of reality itself, and many other creatures once only thought of in mystical stories and fanciful fairytales.

The most powerful of these creatures is undoubtedly the demon because of its ability to fly, but any of these creatures could have overthrown the humans if it weren't for several genetic flaws that arise in the other species. While all of the creatures were stronger than the humans, had an equal or higher intelegence, and had a longer lifespan, they also had much lower birthrates and a tendency toward homosexuality that kept their populations low enough for the human race to be at least a threat, often times a match.

The power struggle between humans and demons currently rests in the demon's favor. That did not mean, however, that humans were enslaved or mistreated. Years of shifting balances between the two races and several enslavements of both races by the other had taught them not to mistreat each other, less they be mistreated in turn. The demons have control of the government, which simply means that most the demons in that area, which is usually in the area of ten or twenty, hold a position in the government and the head of the government falls under demon rule. Of course, loner demons that prefer to work alone are fairly common since some demons find it hard to remain in one place for a long period of time. These demons often become bounty hunters, guards, thieves, or leaders of rebel groups. Many times they will settle if they find a mate, not necessarily of the opposite gender, but some remain freelance all their lives, which is generally two to three hundred years.

This extended lifespan is also shared by most of the creature developed by ancient wars. Sorcerers, werebeasts, and many others share this lifespan with demons, though there are a few that have lifetimes shorter than that of a human.

One would think, with such a low birthrate, that even with the longer life the demons would face extinction due to the low birthrates. And on many occasions this has been true, the demons almost died out many times simply for a lack of new blood. It is only human greed that saves them. When the demon population grows to low the humans overthrow them, often making them the most prized bed slaves of the household. Because the demons are so popular they are often forced to mate with human females, and the resulting child is always a pure demon, since demon genes are able to dominate all other genes thus ruling out any possibility of a half-blood.

This world, seemingly dangerous and chaotic, is in actuality not all that different from the world to day; there are still monsters waiting for careless action, still people to fight those monsters, still wars fought by politics between politics, still people trying to make things better and people trying to make things worse. The story is the same, only the characters are different.


	2. God02

_Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, yet._

God POV

Heero dipped his feet in the cool stream waters. The gentle flow of the water made tiny ripples around his ankles as he sat and simply marveled at the beauty of nature. It wasn't often that Heero was given the time to sit idly by and he relished every moment of it.

Normally, Heero would have been locked up in a room cooking or cleaning at this time of day. It was only because dragons had traveled too far south on their yearly migration this year and the hunters refused to leave the castle that he was allowed out today. Being the primary slave of Lord J, Heero had the lowest class of anyone in the stronghold and was deemed the most expendable. So if it did happen that Heero got lost or injured, there would be no search parties sent for him.

Heero's home, Wing Stronghold, was mastered by Lord J, a doctor by practice who had no tolerance for inefficiency, especially from Heero. Though the stronghold was only one of nearly twenty in the region which was run by a demon lord, Heero knew nothing of life outside stronghold. To him, Lord J ruled everything and everyone in existence and no one stood above him. Heero probably would not believe it if someone told him that J was actually a relatively small lord ruled over by countless other lords and demons higher up on the governing chain. For Heero, life was simply obeying the orders of J and those at stronghold.

Heero sighed and pulled his feet out of the water, once again donning his old, tattered yellow combat boots. He picked up his catch, a few rabbits and a quail, and headed back. He knew that if he stayed out much longer, he wouldn't get the dishes finished until late, and he wouldn't get the weapons in the armory polished until early morning, which meant he would only get a few hours sleep.

A huge crash interrupted Heero's thoughts and the roar of a dragon could be heard all through the clearing not a second later. Heero froze, dropping his catch so that he didn't get any blood on him for the dragon to scent. Mere seconds passed before another crash and roar were heard. Heero realized that the dragon hadn't even noticed him. Curiosity assailed him and he wondered what could possibly have a dragon so riled up.

A normal person would have run as soon as they got the chance if they knew there was a dragon in the area, but Heero was not normal. Heero was a slave that knew nothing of his life other than that it was worthless. So he didn't even flinch at the prospect of dying a gruesome death, even being eaten alive by a dragon.

Heero followed the noise, carefully creeping around bushes and branches until he parted to branches of a fir tree to see a dragon on the ground in its death throes.

The dragon was immense. Probably the size of two horses lined up in front of each other, plus the tail of the dragon was at least another horse-length. It was a dark crimson color and its small yellow eyes were clearly visible even though it whipped its head back and forth rapidly. Sharp fangs protruded from its mouth and dripped venom when it roared. Its tail slapped back and forth madly like it was trying to dislodge death. A death which was swiftly approaching, judging by the amount of blood that sprayed from the slit in it's throat.

When the dragon finally stopped moving and the light faded from its eyes, Heero approached. He was very careful to make sure the creature was dead before he approached. Even if the animal had been too wounded to attach him, one bite from the dragon's fangs could inject enough poison to bring down twenty men.

Originally Heero had thought that only another dragon could kill one of its own kind, but the tear in the red dragon's neck was too clean to have come from teeth. Though a large group of hunters might have been able to bring down a dragon there was none of the evidence Heero would have surely spotted had they been in the forest.

There was another rustle from the bushes, this one quieter than would have been made by a dragon. Heero drew his hunting knife, just in case, and parted the bushes. There was a flash and Heero raised his arm just in time to block a blow from something very sharp. Heero stepped to the left to avoid any further blows as blood trickled down his forearm.

The creature in front of him was something that Heero had never seen before. At first, all Heero could see was a mass of dark brown hair and two jet black wings. As the creature shifted he could see that it was vaguely humanoid but it had a long tail with a sharp spike affixed to the end. Heero realized that the tail must have been what hit him as the creature swung its tail around again and barely missed taking off his hand. Heero knew that it would be best to run, but something quite akin to curiosity held him in his place, though Heero had never known curiosity before. The creature managed to get itself into a half sitting position and Heero could see that, save the dagger-like claws on its hands and feet, the rest of its body was human. It even wore pants and might have worn a shirt at one time but there was little evidence of that. The creature was in fairly poor condition. One of its wings was torn and bloodied and was covered with deep scratches and bruises. It also had what looked to be a large puncture on its left thigh that was bleeding profusely and a long tear on its chest, from shoulder to stomach.

Again the creature moved and this time revealed its face. The most noticeable thing about its face was the two large violet eyes that burned themselves into Heero's brain. Also noted were the high cheekbones and full lips, but it was the eyes that truly attracted Heero. In an instant, Heero made the most rash decision of his life. He knew that the creature would need help if it were to survive and he loathed the thought of letting the light go out of those violet eyes. He would try and save it, by whatever means necessary, no matter what the consequences to himself.

Cautiously, ever aware of where the tail was, Heero approached. The creature followed him with its eyes but never made an aggressive move. Carefully as not to scare the creature, Heero knelt and began assessing the wounds.

Heero immediately saw the puncture wound and realized it must have come from one of the dragon's fangs. Working quickly, he pulled out his knife and made a cut above the wound, then began sucking out the poison. The creature, which had been watching curiously up until that point, made a hissing sound, but seemed to calm once it saw Heero spitting the blood onto the ground. Heero sucked and spat the blood as fast as he could for a few minutes, then cut off a piece of his shirt and wrapped it tightly around the leg just above the bite to try and keep the poison from spreading. Heero jumped up and stalked over to the shore of the stream, where he pulled up some herbs and smashed them into a poultice which he carefully applied to the creatures leg.

The creature was now watching him intently, seeming a bit uncertain. In a moment, its eyes hardened as it came to a decision. The creature reached out and grabbed Heero's wrist as soon as the poultice was applied. Heero jumped, but did nothing to pull away. Slowly, the creature raised Heero's injured wrist to his lips and licked the wound clean.

Something seemed to break open in Heero's mind as the creature finished cleaning his wound, but it faded into the background so quickly that Heero wasn't even certain he had ever felt it.

The creature closed its eyes and released Heero's wrist, allowing Heero to go back to work. Heero quickly realized that in order to bandage the wounds he would have to clean them, and that the poultice would soon need replacing. Gently, ever aware that the creature was potentially dangerous, Heero lifted the light body and carried it to the creak.

Quickly removing his own clothes, Heero helped the creature out of what remained of its pants and learned that the creature was, most certainly, male.

Heero carried the heavily breathing creature into the water and quickly washed the dirt from his wounds. Heero realized when he was trying to get the creature's attention, that he didn't know what to call him.

"Tatsu ni shi," Heero decided, trying out his native language to see how it would sound on his tongue after so long. Heero was not allowed to speak his native language and had been told to forget it since it was unlikely he would ever need it. It was not necessary since he would probably never leave the stronghold. If anyone found him using it he would most be beaten for disobedience. Or, Heero shuttered with the thought, retrained.

Immediately, Heero pushed that thought aside, unable to confront it. Instead, he whispered to the creature as he carried him up the bank, "Tatsu ni shi. Death of dragons. Maybe I should call you Shi for short. Namae wa Shi desu."

The creature looked stunned, blinked a few times, then had his attention pulled away from the name he had just been given by Heero attending to the wounds on his wings.

The actual bandaging of the wounds didn't take long, even the one on Shi's chest had stopped bleeding and was looking strangely better than it had just a few minutes before, but Heero worried about the flush creeping into Shi's face. When he touched Shi's forehead, he found it burned with fever.

Helplessly, Heero realized that all he could do was wait and hope that he got enough of the venom out. Heero lifted Shi in his arms and, attaching the meat he had caught earlier to his belt, headed for home.

_I would like to explain my use of Japanese here. Anyone who hasn't studied it would probably think that since Shi means death and tatsu means dragon, directly translated, "Tatsu ni shi" reads "Dragon of death." However, like "Shi ni gami" would technically read "Death of god" you flip-flop the words in translation to get "God of death" and "Death of dragons."_


	3. Heero02

Heero POV

In all my life I don't ever remember doing something that went against my training. I don't remember ever caring about anyone. I simply drifted through life without a care for anyone but myself, and I cared very little even for that. I knew that no matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried, I would only ever know suffering. Of course, I tried to lessen my suffering by listening to orders and obeying every command I was given, but it was a pathetic way to live.

For a long time, I didn't care at all whether I lived or I died, which is worse than wanting to die or being afraid of death, since you have nothing to hope for.

When I found Shi, it was his eyes that attracted me. I could see in his eyes that he knew death. I could see that he had given death to thousands of creatures, that he was a killer. I could see that he wasn't afraid of death, and yet he chose to live.

He _chose_ to live.

Even without my help I believe that Shi would have lived. It was like he was daring anything to try and kill him. His eyes showed so much emotion, so much life, I envied him. My eyes had gone dead and lifeless long ago.

I took Shi to my room and put him in my bed. That was the best I could do for him. I didn't have any food, being drastically underfed myself, and I couldn't stay with him or he might have been found. All I could do was put him in my bed and leave him there, hoping he could ride it out. I did put my other pair of shorts on him, I had abandoned his in the woods since they were unuseable, but I couldn't give him a shirt since mine had been used as a bandage and I only had two.

I went and told Master J that I had been delayed by a dragon in the forest and forced to hide in a cave. He believed me, but threw me against a wall anyway.

It was barely beginning to get light out when I finished my chores that first day, I sneaked back in the room about two in the morning. I was going to have to be up again in about two hours, but I wasn't worried. It was pretty uncommon for me to sleep more than four hours anyway.

Shi was burning with fever. I tried to cool him off with a wet rag, but only managed to make him start shivering violently. Giving up, I soon slipped under the blankets next to him. I fell asleep almost instantly, only casually aware of the little sounds he made in his sleep.

The next day went better than the first had. I tried to complete all my chores quickly so I could sneak back and see Shi. When I did see him, his fever was gone but he was shivering so violently that I worried he might fall out of bed. Desperately, I tried to get him to drink something.

"Nonde kudasai (Please drink.)," I begged, but it was no use. Soon, I had to give up and go back to work.

I managed to finish work early that night. When I returned, Shi's fever was back and his chills lingered, but they seemed more mild than before. He was sleeping, if not well, more peacefully than he had been. He was constantly making sounds in his sleep, growls, like a big cat, howls, like a wolf, and yips, like a coyote. I was only thankful that these noises were soft, not loud enough to alert anyone to his presence. I was afraid of what might happen to him if he were found. He might be killed to protect the stronghold, or sold off. I had often heard of travel circuses and such that sported odd creatures, but never one like Shi, and I didn't want to see him in a cage. I would also be severely punished if Shi were found, but that was inconsequential.

I climbed into bed next to him and the sounds he made cooed me to sleep.

The next day I had a little less work to do than before, since an ambassador from another stronghold had arrived. The ambassador was supposed to have a meeting with a demon who had been scheduled to arrive and find out why the dragons had come so close to us. The castle was in quite an uproar because he hadn't arrived yet when he should have been here three days ago. It really didn't concern me, all I knew was that I was to keep out of sight of the ambassador, which suited me fine. However, since I was to stay out of sight, that left me open to attack from Dekim and Barton (not Trowa).

Dekim and Barton were both guards at stronghold, though not very good ones. Both of them were huge, burly men. They had a taste for alcohol and sex with just about anything they could get their hands on. In the past few years, they'd set their sights on me.

I had absolutely no interest in either one of the two men. I didn't even have an interest in sex at the time, so I avoided them both as much as I could. Of course, they had managed to catch me on several occasions. Once, Dekim had managed to grab me in one of the halls and shoved his tongue down my throat, another time Barton caught me alone and shoved his fingers up my butt.

Up until that point I hadn't the slightest idea how two men would have sex together. After that it was sort of easy to see, but brought about the new question of why anyone would want to do that. I knew that several men in stronghold who had male lovers and one of them had to be on the bottom. It hurt so bad when Batron put his fingers in me I had trouble waking, why would anyone willingly do that?

The only thing that saved me was that Dekim and Barton didn't want to get caught with me, saying that I was too ugly and I should be grateful that they would even think of taking me. I think that Master J would have chastened them for "inefficient" use of his slave, but I had no solid proof. Also, I found a small hole near the ceiling in my hall. It was just a little crevice where two beams in the ceiling met, but I could see everyone and no one could see me. Often, I would hide from them there. No matter how inefficient using me that way was, I doubted Master J would come and put a stop to it if I got caught.

I managed to sneak into the kitchen and steal some leftover broth for Shi to eat. If the cook caught me, she would probably hit me with the riding crop she kept next to the fireplace to scare off stray dogs. I had become fairly good at sneaking around her and she didn't bother trying to find out who took the extra food unless it was fresh.

I managed to get Shi to eat a few bites, but no more than that. I couldn't help but eat the rest myself, it wasn't often that I got much to eat. Once I finished, I laid down next to Shi for a nap. I had a feeling Master J would call on me for some duty later that night and I wouldn't get much sleep. I laid down and closed my eyes, but sleep would not come and, after a while, Shi started tossing and turning, making little sounds like he was in a nightmare.

"Shi? Diajoubu desu ka? (Shi? Are you alright?)" I asked and he settled a bit at my voice so I continued speaking.

"Namae wa Heero desu. (My name is Heero.) Watashi no tomodachi desu ka? (Will you be my friend?) Doko kara kimashita ka? (Where did you come from?) Doko ni ikimashita ka? (Where were you going?) Nihongo o hanashimasu ka? (Do you speak Japanese?)"

Slowly, we both fell asleep, curled up together like puppies.

I awoke to the sound of a knock on my door and quickly untangled myself from Shi. I wasn't worried about the person barging in since the same person always came to get me and had never entered my room before.

The man stood at my door holding a lantern when I came out. I knew without looking that this was a messenger from Master J. Without saying anything, he turned and led the way down the halls to Master J's room.

I never liked Master J, but I never hated him either. He made me nervous and his arm had this monstrous look to it, but he never did anything cruel just for the fun of it or go out of his way to hurt me. In the end I simply wrote him off as one of those things that you simply have to live with.

Master J was sitting in his chair when the messenger opened the door and pushed me inside, closing the door with a sinister click. His metal hand gleamed in the dim light and my eyes were immediately drawn to it, only to be pulled away when he spoke.

"Boy, I assume you know where the ambassador is staying?" he asked. Of course, I did, I had cleaned the room for him not more than a day ago. Silently, I nodded.

"Then tonight you will sneak into his room tonight and kill him. You may be as messy as you want since we are going to blame his death on a band of thieves that we caught yesterday, but remember that you will have to clean that room later. Do you understand?"

I didn't want to kill while Shi was here. I didn't want to risk showing him how evil I was, but there was nothing I could do about it. Absently, I nodded.

"Ha-Yes."

Master J's metal arm lashed out and struck my face, sending me flying against a wall. In my time spent talking to Shi, I had forgotten that I was not to speak my native tongue and I was paying for it. I fell to my knees and spit out blood, hoping my jaw wasn't broken.

"I told you to forget that language; you will never need it again. You will obey me and never utter a word of that again. Need I retrain you again?" Master J hissed.

I shuttered and closed my eyes, brokenly whispering, "No. Please..."

Flashes of beasts and monsters came to me. Ripping me apart. Eating my insides. Pain. Pain that no one should ever have to feel. And death, so close, but so far. In those broken hours of "retraining" I wished for death. Prayed for it. Begged it to come, but it didn't. Death passed me by only to be replaced with this... emptiness. Nothingness. Apathy.

"Then go do your job!" Master J snapped. I was on my feet and out the door before I even realized it.

Never. Never again. I'd die first.

The ambassador's room was elegant and tasteful. Lavish carpets strewn the floor and velvet blinds kept the moonlight from peeking in the window. Silken draperies hung from the bed and a thick quilt was pulled up to the man's neck, so that I could only see his outline. The man was lying on his stomach, his head tilted to the side so that he could breath. Quickly and carefully, I brought my knife down through the back of his neck, between the vertebrae, severing his spinal cord and throat at the same time, so that he could neither yell nor thrash as he died. In all likelihood, he would never even realize what had happened until he was dead.

Still, no matter how careful I was, blood still sprayed onto my hands, warm from the life it had recently supported. I tried to wipe it off on my clothes as I walked down the narrow hall to my room, but it would not come off. I could only hope that Shi would be asleep when I came in. I didn't want him to know I was a killer.

I entered my room quietly, trying not to awaken Shi. Hopefully, he would sleep until I could get cleaned up...

A thought that was dashed to pieces when Shi propped himself up on his elbow and let his gaze wonder over me, briefly resting on my hands. I felt tears form in my eyes but knew that I could not cry, even if I wanted to, because of my training. So I just stood there, helpless.

What would Shi think of me? Would he even understand what I was? Would he ignore it? Would he hate me? What if he left?

The room was tiny, not larger than a closet, so when Shi reached out to me, he didn't even have to get out of bed to touch me. Gently, he took my hand and pulled me over to sit on the bed, then used the rag that I had cooled him with to wipe the blood off my hands and weakly tugged at my dirty clothes. Quickly, I shrugged out of my clothes and slid into bed beside Shi, who was already half asleep. I couldn't help but cuddle up against him and nearly sighed in happiness when he put his arms around me and pulled me closer. I wasn't sure if Shi even understood what I had done, but he didn't hate me. That was enough for me.

The next day, I was back to a full shift of work. I managed to steal some more food for Shi, who did eat a little more than last time. He even smiled at me before falling asleep again. It seemed that soon he would be back to full health, a fact I had mixed feelings about.

I wanted him back to full health, but I didn't want him to leave me. I tried not to dwell on the issue, but it seemed to prey on my thoughts whenever it could.

Most of my day was spent cleaning the blood from the ambassador's room. He had managed to bleed a lot more than I thought he would. Then I still had dishes and laundry to do, so it was very late by the time I got done.

It was getting light out by the time I headed back for my room. I was exhausted, so I didn't realize that I wasn't alone until a hand grabbed me by the shirt and threw me against a wall, pinning me to it.

"Look here, Barton, looks like someone's up past their bed time," Dekim slurred pressing his face close to mine, "Would you like a goodnight kiss?"

"Maybe we should tuck you in, just to be sure," came Barton's voice from behind him. I knew that nothing was showing on my face, even though my heart was racing. I looked around for some way to escape, but the only way out was passed these two, who each outweighed me by about a hundred pounds. As Dekim leaned down, grabbed my groin, and squeezed the tender flesh, I realized that I might not be able to get out this time. I realized that they might actually take what they wanted from me. They might kill me.

A picture of Shi sprang to my mind and I realized I couldn't allow that to happen.

With all the strength that I had, I shoved Dekim away from me. He fell, more out of surprise than anything. Then I ran as fast as I could.

I had been trained as a soldier and an assassin, I should have been able to take both of the men that were chasing me out in seconds. I had been a soldier and I had been good at it, but years of under feeding and sleep deprivation had taken their toll on me. I didn't stand a chance, so I ran for my room, hoping if I barricaded my door they'd eventually give up.

I managed to get to my room just a second before the two of them did and slammed the door shut, throwing my tattered old dresser in front of it. It only took me a moment to realize it wasn't going to hold. I turned and realized that if those two got in my room, the first thing they'd see was Shi. I grabbed Shi by the arm and tried to pull him from the bed, but he only sat up and looked at me with unconcerned eyes. I tried to make him understand.

"You have to hide! They'll kill you! They can't see you! Go!"

Shi covered my mouth with his hand and stood, pushing me back onto the bed. Briefly, I marveled that he could stand already, but that thought was soon pushed aside by the sound of the door giving way.

Shi must have looked pretty impressive to Dekim and Barton, standing there with his wings stretched out on either side of him, glaring at the two menacingly. They broth froze, the color drained from their faces.

"Demon!" cried Barton and they both bowed before running out of the room shouting for Master J. Briefly, I wondered how much trouble I would be in.

Demon? Who was a demon? Shi? No, that couldn't be right.

Shi turned to me and smiled, then flopped back down on the bed beside me, his little strength having been taxed to its limit. I was still trying to figure out what had just happened when he took my face in his hands and force me to look at him.

"Hajimemashite.(Hello, it's nice to meet you.) Namae wa Duo desu. (My name is Duo.) Nihongo o hanashimasu. (I speak Japanese.) Sore kara, eigo o hanashimasu. (And I speak English.) Russia kara kimashita. (I come from Russia.) Koko ni ikimashita. (I was coming here.) Tomodachi desu. (I will be your friend.)"

I couldn't believe it. I think I might have even blacked out for a second, because the next thing I knew, Shi- no, Duo was right in front of me looking a bit concerned.

"Heero, you alright?" he asked.

"H-hai," I replied just before Master J decided to make his entrance.

"Welcome, Lord Duo. I was not aware you had arrived," Master J said politely. I realized that Duo must be of some great importance if Master J was being nice.

"I was... delayed. I presume that the ambassador from China has arrived?"

"An unfortunate accident occurred while he was sleeping. It seems that a rogue band of thieves as assassinated him, but do not worry, we have them in custody."

"And what would a rogue band of thieves gain by killing an ambassador?"

"I-I will find out their motive soon, I assure you."

"I'm sure. And about your... slave here?" Duo asked indicating me.

"I assure you, he will be punished for this," Master J said harshly. I flinched at the tone.

"The usual punishment for detaining royalty is death," Duo stated, leaning back a on his elbow in an insolent and nonchalant manner. I wondered if this was a dream, or if he really hated me so much that he would say we were friends one minute, then try to kill me the next. Nothing made sense anymore.

"He will be executed tonight," Master J assured, though he did not look pleased at this.

"In that case, can I have him?" Duo asked, just a glimmer of mischief in his eyes. Master J looked about ready to blow his top, but clenched his jaw and ground out, "Of course," before storming out of the room.

What had just happened?

Shi was Duo?

A demon?

A demon more powerful than Master J?

And I now belonged to Duo instead of Ma-... no, J and Master Duo.

As I was desperately trying to get all this to make sense, Duo reached out and gently shut the door, before pulling me down to the bed beside him.

"Go to sleep," he whispered, "You can worry about it tomorrow."

And suddenly, it didn't matter. Nothing mattered but the feel of Duo's arms around me and the feeling of safety I had. I drifted to sleep.


	4. Heero03

Heero POV

Hours later, I opened my eyes and stretched. I had to get started if I wanted to get all my work done. Carefully, as not to wake Duo, I untangled myself from his grasp. I was almost free when his hand suddenly tightened around my wrist and his eyes opened.

"Where you goin'?" he asked groggily.

"I have to get to work," I whispered back to him

"Silly," he said, pulling me back into the bed, "You work for me now."

"But I have so much to do. Master J will be angry if I don't do anything," I said, starting to struggle. I had to pull my weight or Master J would retrain me...

"J isn't your master anymore."

"But I have to..."

"No buts, Heero. You have to get a good night's sleep, it doesn't seem like you've had one of those in a long time."

"Master please..."

Duo's tail came up and smacked me on the forehead with a loud "thwack!" It didn't really hurt so much as it startled me and I jumped.

"None of that!" Duo growled, the grogginess gone from his eyes replaced by a glare, "You are not to refer to me as Master. Just Duo. I'm not your owner, I'm your friend. I'm still the same Duo I was yesterday. I'm still...Shi."

Where all of Duo's other comments about being the same person failed, that one got through. I didn't want to lose Shi... Duo. It was time for me to admit that my injured, helpless Shi was also the intelligent, powerful Duo. I trusted Shi, so I trusted Duo. He made me feel... safe.

I stopped struggling and allowed Duo to pull me back into bed. Even though I was anxious about not doing my work, the warmth of Duo's body wrapped around mine and the sound of his steady breathing were too much, and I soon drifted off to sleep.

Duo woke me hours later. It felt weird to be fully rested, I couldn't remember the last time I hadn't felt groggy. Duo looked like he felt better. I reached up to touch his forehead and found that his fever was completely gone. He smiled at me, then sat up and tugged me out of bed.

"Come on, sleepyhead. You can't lay in bed _all_ day," he teased gently.

"Yes mast-... Duo," I said, trying to hide my mistake. Duo gave me a blinding smile, stretched, and opened the door.

"Hey! You there!" he called out into the hallway. A timid, "Yes?" was replied in a voice I knew as one of the young female servants.

"What's your name?"

"Sara, sir."

"Alright, Sara, me and my friend here are gonna need some new clothes. Think you could help me with that?" he asked, keeping his voice light. I wasn't sure what to do, so simply remained quiet. I could just barely see Sara, a timid smile on her face. I didn't dislike Sara, I barely knew her. All I knew about her was that she was hired as extra help when Mas-... J had guests.

"Umm... I can go get the seamstress and ask her to give you an appointment."

"That would be helpful. Could you also ask if another room has been prepared for me and see when lunch is? Oh! And where is the washroom?" Duo asked, still smiling at her. Sara's smile became less timid and she seemed to relax.

"Of course, my lord And the washroom is just down the hall. Go down six doors and it will be on your left."

"Thank you. I hope I'm not bothering you."

"No, of course not. I get paid to do help Lord J's guests."

Then she trotted off down the hall and Duo came back into the room and pulled me down the hall to the washroom. I, like most people at stronghold, usually used the outhouses out side and the river to bath in. The normal people living at stronghold weren't allowed to use the indoor baths and didn't even know how they worked. Some of the kitchens had water that came from pipes, so that wasn't so strange, but most of the water had to be carried in from the well or stream. From my training I knew that the baths worked by a system of heated pipes, but no more than that.

It seemed odd to go to the bathroom inside. When we got there, Duo automatically disappeared behind one of the doors into a small room. I wasn't sure what to do, but I knew what people did in the rooms so I found something resembled an outhouse and did my business, then washed myself in the sink. Even though I knew that the water in these rooms was heated, it was still a surprise when the water came out of the pipe hot.

I finished before Duo did, so I took some time to look around my stall. I found a cupboard with various rags, towels, and soaps. I also found another, smaller stall inside my stall. It had a pipe leading out of the wall close to the ceiling. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I turned the knob and little droplets of water sprayed all over the place. I hurried to turn it off and went to wait for Duo in the main room.

It took longer than I expected for Duo to come out, so I ended up waiting for him on the floor in front of the door. I don't know where he managed to find a brush, but when he came out of his own little bathroom stall he was brushing his hair. I was a little disappointed to see him quickly braid it and tie it with a string, I liked having his hair down. It was nice to burry my face in it while he was sleeping and sniff his scent.

However, he did let me help him dry his wings. He told me while I was toweling off the feathers that he usually went flying to dry them off, but he wasn't quite feeling up to that just yet. I thought that flying must be wonderful, but didn't say anything. Once I finished, Duo and I headed out to meet Sara and get some new clothes. I could understand why Duo would want new clothes, all he had on were my shorts which, with his tail, barely managed to cover him.

Which also reminded me that he said something about getting a new room. I wondered if I'd ever see him again. I knew he had taken me for his slave, but who would want to keep someone like me around all the time? Maybe I'd get to see him when I was cleaning the rooms or something. Then again, he didn't want me working for Lord J anymore, so maybe he had his own jobs for me to do.

Sara led the way to the seamstress and Duo pulled me after him. I had never been to the seamstress before, all my clothes had been second hand. I could use another set of clothes, but there was no need to make another set. I could just get some hand-me-downs from the discard pile. I wanted to tell Duo this, but we were at the seamstress before I could put the thought into words.

Duo got along fine with the seamstress. He hopped right up on the little stool she used to measure and turned anyway she asked, joking with her all the time. I was amazed by how precise the measurements had to be for a simple set of clothing.

Once that was done, Duo hopped down and walked into the hall to speak with Sara. Then the seamstress turned to me.

Unfortunately, when it came to be my turn, I froze. What was Duo thinking? I wasn't one of them, I didn't need all this. To hide my anxiety, I put on a mask of indifference and coldly told them, "This is unnecessary."

The seamstress frowned, probably thinking I was being stubborn, and I wondered how mad Duo would be at me. Would he want to get rid of me already?

"Unnecessary or not, if you want new clothes you have to get them through me, so hop up here and let me get to work," the seamstress said in an angry tone. Everyone in the room turned to look my way, wondering what had gotten the seamstress so upset. All those eyes on me, I hated being the center of attention. I felt that they all wanted something from me and, since I couldn't give it, they'd know I was... a monster.

I was about ready to bolt, although I would have hidden my fear by glaring and walking calmly out of the room, when Duo came over and stood in front of me, folding his wings around us both so we couldn't be seen. He put his hands on my shoulders gently and I felt some of the panic leave me. Absently, I wondered how he knew what was going on.

"It's alright, Heero. There's no need to be nervous. They're not going to hurt, I won't let anything happen. All you have to do is stand on the stool for a few minutes and we'll head back to the room, alright?"

Duo made it sound so easy that I was ashamed at my fear. I must have looked like such a coward. I nodded and Duo smiled gently, then ran his hand through my hair.

"You're so brave," he said and had us turned back around to the rest of the people in the room before I could do anything but gape in disbelief.

Cautiously, I stepped up onto the stool and allowed the seamstress to measure my arms, and my shoulders, then my height. It was decidedly not a comfortable thing when she started to measure my waist, legs, and thighs, but I managed to keep from jumping. All in all, it was an uncomfortable thing, but not as horrifying as I had originally thought. By the end, I was feeling decidedly stupid about my whole earlier outburst.

With the seamstress's dismissal of, "The clothes will be finished by nightfall," Duo and I headed back to my room. Duo flopped down on the bed the instant we got there, but didn't go to sleep. I knew he was waiting for Sara to return with word of where his new room would be and something clenched in my gut. I almost felt like crying, something I hadn't done since my retraining.

Duo didn't notice. He was looking around absently when he asked, "Heero, is there anything in here you'd like to take with you?"

"Take with me?" I asked in stunned confusion.

"Yeah, I think we should get a bigger room. This one's a little small. I mean, if you'd really like to stay here, we could, but I think it would draw less attention if I were staying in a bigger room. Peasants get kinda antsy when a demon is creeping around them, they like to have people like me where they can keep an eye on us. But, it doesn't matter to me. I could just tell them we decided to stay here for... defensive purposes or something."

Duo wanted me to go with him?

"I would not mind moving to a bigger room," I told him. I had never held any attachments for this room, I had hardly been in it at all and it was not only small, but drafty and dirty too.

The blanket on the bed, however, had been with me as far back as I could remember. In my mind, it connected directly with memories of my father, Odin. It was old and had faded so much that even I couldn't remember what color it had been. It had holes all through it and the edges were tattered. But still...

"I- Could I keep the blanket?" I asked, a blush rising to my face.

"Of course," Duo replied, still smiling. "Anything else?"

There was nothing else in the room except the bed, the mattress and an old dresser. We were wearing all the clothes I owned and Lord J didn't believe in personal possessions. He didn't want me to form any emotional attachments.

"No."

"Alright then, come 'ere."

I approached the bed from where I was standing near the door. Duo reached a hand out and tugged me onto the bed, allowing me to curl up on his chest like I had the past few nights. There was no way I could go back to sleep, so I simply closed my eyes and enjoyed in the heat of Duo's body, listening to the sound of his heart.

It seemed like only minutes later when a light nock sounded on the door, loud enough to be heard, but soft enough to be ignored if we were sleeping. I half wished we were.

Duo opened his eyes and sat up, sliding me off onto the bed. Gently, before heading to the door, he squeezed my shoulder and gave me a small smile. Then he opened the door and the moment was lost.

"I hope I'm not disturbing you, milord," Sara commented, curtseying, "But your room is ready if you'd like to go there. And lunch will be served in an hour."

Duo's stomach chose that time to protest loudly.

"Heh. I don't think my stomach wants to wait that long. Perhaps you could have a snack taken up to the room?"

"Certainly, milord."

"And you might want to have lunch delivered there, too. I don't think I have anything proper to wear to lunch, if you know what I mean."

Sara stifled a giggle and said, "Certainly, milord," before turning out the door. Turning to me, Duo took my hand and grabbed my blanket before heading out after her.

The first thing I thought when I saw are room was, "Which lord is staying here?"

The second was, "Duo."

The room was different from the one the ambassador got, for that I was grateful. Instead of a canopy bed it had a regular one, with purple satin sheets. It made me a bit embarrassed about my own dirty blanket, however I was glad to have it, since it was the only thing in the room even remotely familiar, save for Duo.

I examined the room further while Duo waited for Sara to come back with a snack. The room was about twenty times the size of mine. It had a thick, burgundy carpet and a large open fireplace. It also had a huge window leading to a balcony where you could oversee the activity going on in the courtyard. There was a bookshelf in one corner, with volumes of professional looking books stacked on it, their red-brown bindings all lined up in neat rows. In front of that was a chess board, the little chess pieces all in their designated spaces.

Duo came back with a tray laden with fruits. I continued to wander around the room and stumbled upon another door in our room.

"Heero," Duo called before I called open it, "Come have a snack."

"But I usually don't eat until later..."

"Come eat. You don't look like you've ever had a good meal. We need to put a little weight on you before you blow away," Duo teased. Blushing, I walked over and picked up a piece of fruit from the tray.

I managed to eat what amounts to half an apple in various fruit slices. Duo didn't seem pleased, but didn't comment.

"Heero, can you read?" he asked me once we had finished eating. I had never seen anyone put away that much food that quickly!

"Of course. It was necessary when I was trained to be a..." I trailed off, realizing what I was about to say. Duo must have noticed something was amiss.

"To be a what, Heero?" he prompted.

"To be a killer," I finished in a whisper, hiding my head in my knees. Duo moved from where he sat on the bed beside me to wrap an arm around my shoulders.

That confused me. I had just confessed that I was a killer, a monster, and he hugs me?

"It's okay," Duo whispered, "We both have some blood on our hands. I've killed people too. You don't mind, do you?"

I shook my head without saying anything and he smiled.

"Then we're even. We both kill. There's nothing to be ashamed of."

I tried to find a way to contradict his reasoning and couldn't.


	5. Heero04

Heero POV

Duo and I spent awhile playing chess before Sara brought up lunch for us.

Lunch was an awkward affair and I was glad Duo had suggested we eat in the room instead of in the formal dining hall in front of everyone. I had just eaten less than an hour before the meal came and I wasn't really hungry at all. I wasn't used to eating more than a small portion of soup once a day, half an apple had been all I could consume.

Duo, meanwhile, had no problem wolfing down two apples, a peach, and half a pear. Then he was ready to eat again when the food came! And there was so much food for lunch. Two heaping bowls of chicken and biscuits, plus breads, desserts, and wine.

Duo thanked Sara, who had set this whole tray full of food on a small table for two near the door, then seated himself and motioned for me to come sit down before digging in. I sat at the table helplessly and stared at the bowl in front of me. I really wasn't hungry. I nibbled a bit at the food, but that was all I could manage. I didn't want to throw up.

A few moments later, Duo noticed my situation, because he looked up and asked, "Heero, is something wrong?"

I didn't say anything, I simply stared at the meal. I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to disappoint Duo by not eating, but I simply couldn't do it.

"Heero, don't you like the food?" he asked again. If only it were that simple. The little that I had eaten had tasted wonderful, probably better than anything else in my life, but it just wasn't possible for me to eat anymore. Just like I couldn't sleep as much as Duo wanted.

I frowned, the only expression I allowed to show on my face. I wanted desperately to stay with Duo. He seemed to... care about me. Me, the killer.

I could feel my anxiety rising by the second. I knew I needed to say something, and soon, but I didn't know what. The tension in my body increased and I could feel the blood pounding in my veins. I thought of running out of the room, anything would be better than having Duo hate me...

And suddenly, Duo was kneeling next to my chair, holding my upper body in a strong embrace. I had been so wrapped up in myself that I hadn't even seen him move. Gently, he pulled me out of the chair and into his lap, wrapping his arms around me and cuddling me to his chest.

"Heero, don't run away from me," he told me and my blood chilled. He knew what I had planned to do. Was he angry? Would he hate me? Was I going to be... punished?

I know that I keep everything I feel hidden and never let it show on my face, part of my training, but somehow Duo could see through that mask into what I was really feeling. And at that time, I was scared. Not really of Duo, but of Duo's feelings and the consequences of my own actions.

"You don't ever have to be afraid of me," Duo said, speaking slowly to try and get through my anxiety, "I will never leave you. I will not allow anything to hurt you. I will never hurt you. Do you understand?"

All I could do was nod against his chest.

"I want you to tell me what was wrong. What brought all this on? I won't judge you and I won't get mad, but I need to know."

Swallowing, I told him, "I-I can't eat anymore. I'm sorry, but..."

"Shh," Duo quieted me before I could go off into an apologetic rambling, but he didn't release me. Instead, he seemed to ponder what I had said. After a little while, he began to speak again.

"I don't want you to have to tiptoe around me like this, Heero. When something's wrong, you have to tell me," he turned to look at me, "I won't lie, I want you to eat some more, but I'm not going to make you eat until you puke. I know you're not used to eating this much or sleeping this much, but that's because you're severely malnourished. I want you to try and stretch your stomach. You'll have to eat until it's uncomfortable, not painful and not until you feel like throwing up, but more than you'd like to eat. You stomach shrank, buddie, you should be able to eat everything that I got today with no problem, but you can't because your stomach isn't big enough. It's making you weak and scattering your thoughts. Or at least, I think it is. You're pretty strong and you seem all together, but still..." Duo trailed off, taking the time to run his fingers through my hair as I continued to plaster myself to his chest. On some level, I had already known everything he was saying, but it was unnerving to hear someone else say it about me.

"We're going to have to get you back into prime condition," Duo said, smiling affectionately, "Which means nothing but sleeping late and eating junk food for you," he teased.

"That doesn't sound too bad," I ventured.

"Hm, you may think that now, but just wait until I have had you tied to a bed for nine hours feeding you nothing but chocolate."

I smirked at that image, it was something that I had never even imagined before.

"Seriously, we're going to have to get your body used to eating and sleeping more than it's used to and you're probably not going to like it."

"It won't... hurt... will it?" I asked timidly, this was starting to sound to much like training for my liking.

"Heero! Didn't I just tell you that I wouldn't let anything hurt you? When I said you might not like it, I meant the mental aspects. Someone who was kept as busy as you were is not going to be happy lying in bed doing nothing for most of the day. Now, let's get back to our meal."

I didn't want to let Duo go. That was probably the first time in my life I would have preferred to simply sit on the floor than do something constructive. When Duo released me and moved back to his own side of the table, it left me feeling cold. And alone. It was all I could do to keep myself from walking around the table and curling up in his lap.

I had already eaten so much that my stomach felt like it would explode, so I only managed two more bites. Duo finished his meal, grabbed a book, and pulled me over to curl up with him on the bed.

Duo was right, I hated it. What was the point of lying in bed if I wasn't even tired? To make things worse, Duo was allowed to read a book, but he wouldn't let me look at one, saying, "If I let you have a book to read, you'll do that instead of sleeping. I can put the book down if I feel tired, I really don't think you could."

Eventually, I did drift off, having nothing better to do.

When I woke some time later, Duo was gone. Quickly, I scanned the room and found no trace of him. My stomach plummeted when I realized that he might have went back to where he came from. Quickly, I threw the covers off and slid out of bed. Maybe I could catch him before he left...

My thoughts were interrupted by Duo prancing around the corner in new clothes, presumably the ones the seamstress had made for him.

He looked stunning, decked out in an all black outfit with long sleeves and pants. It was made of silk so it shifted with his graceful movements. It even had a cape that trailed down over his back and obscured the view of his wings and tail. Grinning, he danced over to me and handed me a pile of clothes, then waved and saying, "Get dressed," before bounding back out the door.

I held up the clothes in my hands. The seamstress must have made a mistake. The clothes I held where made of a beautiful satin with a coat of heavy wool underneath for warmth. It was a deep green color, the color of pine needles in the fall. The stitching was so tiny and intricate that it could barely be seen and it had a beautiful set of wings embroidered into the back. It looked like something for a noble, not a lowly servant like me.

I bit my lip, debating whether it would be worse to disobey Duo's order or put on something that was obviously not for me. Before I could even come up with a decision, Duo poked his head back in the room, frowned, and yelled, "Just put it on already!" Then shut the door again. He certainly seemed to have gained some more energy.

I was in motion before I even knew I was moving, discarding my old clothes and donning the new ones. The last thing I wanted was for Duo to get mad at me. As soon as I had the clothes on, I began to revel in the feel of them. The pleasant swishing sound they made when I moved. The fact that they didn't make my skin itch. The warmth of them.

"You done yet?" Duo called from outside. It dawned on me while I was telling him yes that he had been waiting for me to change to come back in, wanting to let me keep my privacy. I just couldn't understand Duo.

Duo made his entrance with Sara in tow.

"Well," he said, casting an arm my way, "How does he look, Sara?"

"He looks wonderful, milord. Simply stunning!" Sara said, a strange gleam coming into her eyes that made me a bit uncomfortable.

"Sara here was just informing me that dinner will be not too far away and we can go down to the main hall and listen to the minstrels before that. What do you think, Heero?"

"If you would like," I told him, not sure what to say. I had never heard a minstrel before and didn't have much interest in them, but if Duo wanted to go so would I.

"Alright then Sara," Duo said, turning back to her, "Would you go prepare us a table and we'll meet you down there in a few minutes? Thanks hon."

Sara smiled and left. It was no wonder the servants liked Duo so much, he treated them like people instead of slaves. He treated me like a person and I was nothing.

"Heero, are you sure you want to go tonight? We could just eat up here."

"I... Duo, I'm not hungry. I'll go with you to see the minstrel, but..."

"What did I tell you? You're not going to want to eat, but you have to. Just try, alright? And, Heero, tell me if you're getting nervous. We'll leave. Don't get yourself so upset that you're about to go into a panic attack. And, above all, try to have some fun."

I nodded and Duo led me out of the room and down the longs halls. Eventually, we reached the banquet hall. The hall was huge and elaborately decorated. It had almost a theater feeling to it, with a large stage in front. Lots of long, square tables were set up in front of the stage in banquet style. All the important people at stronghold and some of the lesser ones were seated at the table. When we entered, the food was just being laid out and a young, red-haired woman was singing an Irish ballad.

Dinner would have been excellent. I managed to eat more food than I thought I would and Duo seemed to approve since he smiled at me. I even found that I really enjoyed the performances put on. It seemed that a traveling band of gypsies had stopped by and been hired to perform for a few nights. It would have been a wonderful evening if it weren't for the stares and whispers of the people around us.

Even as I sat there I could feel eyes of the people that lived at stronghold, those seated and those serving. They stared at me, then whispered to one another, wondering why someone like me was dressed in such fine clothing, sitting with someone so much high in class than I. I was so afraid that someone was going to come up to us, point at me, and say, "You don't belong here!"

I think Duo sensed my discomfort, but did nothing because he wanted me to ask. He wanted me to show that I understood that I could ask for things and I would get them. But it was hard for me to break away from my old habits. It hadn't even been a week since Duo found me, I was not accustomed to being treated as anything but a slave.

Either way, when I began to shake Duo decided it was time he took a bathroom break. Making our excuses quietly, he pulled me out of the dining hall and to the bathrooms. Once inside, he put a hand on my shoulder and gave me a deep look.

"Calm down," he told me firmly, then disappeared into one of the stalls. I think those few minutes of being alone helped me more than anything. I hated being alone, but I had been alone for so long that having someone with me all the time was starting to get to me. I just needed some time to sort myself all out.

However, as pathetic as it sounds, I found myself missing Duo before he even came out of the stall.

"Feel better?" he asked me lightly, giving me a once over. I nodded.

"Do you want to go back to the room?" he questioned. I thought it over for a minute. I didn't want to have all those people looking at me again, but I had been enjoying the show and Duo seemed to be having fun.

"If you would like, I would prefer to return to the dining hall," I replied. Duo smiled and lead me back to the hall.

I enjoyed most of the evening, even after we got back. People still gave me looks and glances, but it wasn't anything I couldn't stand knowing Duo was there to protect me. It was one of the best days of my life... until the end.

The performers had just finished their last show of the night and everyone was leaving. Duo and I rose form our chairs and began toward the exit. I felt someone's eyes on me and glanced over my shoulder.

Master J was standing behind me, glaring at me hatefully. My blood ran cold. I was too terrified to do anything more than stare. He had on this long, red jacket and I could have sworn it was covered in blood.

I hadn't been working. I hadn't been pulling my weight. Master J was going to retrain me...

The moment lasted only a second before Duo pulled me away, but it seemed like an eternity. I'm not sure I was capable of choosing a direction to walk in at that time, so it was lucky for me that Duo took the lead. I wasn't even aware when he decided to take a detour going to the room and stop at the kitchen. I was, however, aware when he pulled Sara aside and asked her for some fruit as a snack.

"Sure, milord, it'll just take a minute for me to cut it up..."

"Don't bother. Could you just put a knife on the tray? I'm sure we can cut up the fruit by ourselves."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course! You look a little tired, we'll be out of your hair quicker this way."

Perhaps Duo would want me to cut up the fruit for him. And the room needed tidied up. And Duo's clothes needed washed.

I suddenly understood why Mast- Lord J was so angry. There were plenty of things to do, I simply wasn't doing them. I was being lazy and useless. Maybe if I got them all done, I wouldn't be punished. This thought served to brighten my disposition as I followed Duo to the room.

As soon as we got in the room, I set to work. I straightened out the bed, the rugs on the floors, the draperies. I also put Duo's book back on the shelf and put away the pieces to the game we had played. I even set the fruit on the bedside table in case Duo got hungry at night, but I didn't cut it so it would still be fresh hours later. Maybe I could do enough to make up for my earlier behavior and not be punished.

Duo, on the other hand, had not been enlightened to my epiphany. When I asked him if I should take our clothes down to the river to wash, he had a fit.

"Go to bed Heero! You are not doing laundry in the middle of the night! No! N-O!"

"But Duo, I need to earn my keep. Please?"

"What keep? You are not a slave. You are not a possession. You're a living, breathing person, act like it! Eat, sleep, whatever! It's not normal for you to run around working like this. It's not good for you," Duo said with a finality that seemed to nail in place the lid of my coffin. Taking me by the wrist, Duo dragged me over to the bed and forced me out of my clothes into a soft pair of pants and shirt that he pulled from the drawer.

There had to be some way for me to make him let me go.

"Duo, I need to go..."

"No."

"But I want..."

"No."

"Can't I just..."

"Not a chance. Go to sleep," Duo said, pushing me toward the bed.

It went against all my training to push back the way I did, but I had to do it. I had to please Lord J. Duo seemed surprised when I resisted. He frowned in confusion and paused for a moment, then leaned against me lightly, testing my strength. The next time he tried to push me to the bed, he easily over powered me. Climbing onto the bed with me, he pinned me to the mattress.

"Heero, I told you when we started this you weren't going to like being inactive. But it's only for a month or two, until we get your strength back..."

All I could think was,_A month or two?!_ _That's how long he plans to make me do this? Lord J will retrain me at least twenty times!_

I wasn't even thinking when I pushed Duo off of me, but I must have surprised Duo with my strength, because he fell backwards onto the bedside table. I watched as he hit the table and it gave out under his weight, dropping both him and the tray of fruit onto the ground. I watched the knife cut through the palm of his hand and up his wrist. Watched the deep red blood begin to fall onto the carpet with a steady drip.

The next thing I knew, I was running down a hall. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I recognized it as the hall that led to my room and automatically began searching for a place to hide. Quickly, I found my little crevice that I often used to hide from Dekim and Barton. I found it almost ironic that I was now using it to hide from Duo.

I can't tell you how long I hid there, cowering in that tiny space between the beams and the ceiling. Maybe I was waiting for hell hounds to come racing down the hallway and gobble me up. Perhaps I thought the floor would open and swallow me. Maybe I thought I would simply fall into the pits of hell for what I did.

It had happened before.

It might have been an hour or it might have been only fifteen minutes later when I heard Duo's voice calling for me. He seemed like he was trying to calm and cajole me instead of being angry and threatening like I had thought it would be.

As he came closer, I could see a scrap of cloth tied loosely around his wrist. Looking closer, I could see that the cloth had been torn from his shirt and the knot in the make-shift bandage was coming apart quickly.

I could also see blood through the dark material.

I shrank back into my hole as Duo neared me. I tried to keep my breathing shallow so he couldn't hear me. The clap of his bare feet hitting the stone floor echoed through the passage.

Duo stopped right in front of where I was hiding and looked up. I could barely see the top of his head turn so he could see the place where I was.

"Heero?" he questioned calmly. All I could do was move forward where he could see me. Our eyes met and he didn't look angry, but I couldn't understand how he could _not_ be angry with me. I was a bad slave. I was lazy. I never listened to his orders. I _hurt_ him.

"Heero, come down," Duo told me, calmly but determinedly, as though if I didn't come down he would come up an get me.

Usually when I was leaving my hole, I'd just jump the few feet to the ground, but Duo was in my way that time. When he saw me making hesitant movements to try and get down, he reached up his arms. I leaned forward precariously and put my hands on his shoulders. Duo then pulled me out of the hole and gently placed me on the ground, keeping me tight against his chest.

At first, I thought this might have been because he didn't want me to run away. Or maybe he wanted me within hitting range. Or maybe he just wanted to yell at me. The point is, I was on edge, ready to try and counter-balance for any blows I received, my heart in my throat.

Gradually, I realized that Duo wasn't making any aggressive moves and my heart rate slowed down to normal. I dared peek at him under my bangs, but he had me cuddled against his chest so there wasn't much I could see. Absently, Duo ran his hands along my back in a calming gesture. I was starting to drift off right there on my feet when Duo's bandage brushed my elbow. I shot back to attention.

"Duo, I'm so-..."

"Shh. Well talk about this later. You're about to fall asleep on your feet."

"But-..."

"Hush. No more talking."

Then suddenly my feet were no longer on the ground. I grabbed for the nearest object and clutched it to me. It wasn't until I felt the sway of movement that I opened my eyes to see that I was clutching Duo's neck.

"Easy, Heero, I'm not going to drop you," he soothed as I registered that he was carrying me.

Duo carried me all the way back to the room and into bed. He literally pulled back the covers and put me into the bed, then pulled the covers back up before sliding into bed on the other side. He wouldn't let me say a word, hushing me every time I tried to apologize. All I could do was let him pull me tight against his chest, let him cuddle and protect me all through the night.


	6. Heero05

Heero POV

I awoke slowly, like I was coming out of some sort of haze. I was completely encased in a heavy warmth. Something soft and fluffy brushed against my nose and I opened my eyes to see what it was. Gently brushing my nose was the tip of a long, black feather.

The harsh reality hit me and I tried to sit up, only to have the arms around my waste tighten convulsively. Lying still and taking a deep breath, the arms soon loosened, though they still kept me captive. Taking stock of my surroundings, I found that I was in the bed with Duo, cuddled against his chest. The blankets had been shoved to the bottom of the bed and both Duo and I were covered by one of his wings. The other wing was tucked neatly behind Duo, obviously uncomfortable to lay on.

Duo hated me.

He had to, after what I did. How could I have been so stupid? It was more important to keep Duo safe and happy than clean and well-kept. Lord J would understand that...

...No, he wouldn't. But still, Lord J had punished me before and I had survived it, I couldn't survive Duo hating me, I knew it.

I sat up and looked down at Duo's serene face, so calm and peaceful in his sleep. Timidly, I reached out a hand and stroked his bangs away from his eyes. His brows furrowed and his eyelids slowly raised to revel two violet pools. Confusion quickly faded from Duo's eyes and he smiled at me. Not a full power smile, but a smile none the less.

And you couldn't smile at someone you hate, right?

Duo sat up and opened his arms for me, I leaned forward and fell into his embrace. For a moment, we both just enjoyed the feel of each other, but in a moment Duo sighed and said, "You know we're going to have to talk about last night."

I froze and struggled to get some space between us, but Duo held me firm.

"Enough, Heero, you're not going to get away," he said with a finality that stopped my struggles. "I'm not mad at you, I never was. I know this isn't easy for you, but you have to understand that I am trying to help. Heero, if you don't want me here, if you don't like what I'm doing, I can stop. I can leave. I know I really haven't asked your opinion on anything and I really hate when people do that to me, so tell me, do you want to go back to the way things were before? Did you like it better that way?"

"No!" I fairly screamed, tumbling away from Duo in an outburst of emotion. I fell back onto the bed and Duo reeled a bit, though he managed to stay seated.

No, please no. I couldn't go back to living like that.

Duo was looking at me with a mixture of wonder and confusion when I got onto my knees where I could see him. I couldn't judge his feelings from the look on his face, so I moved in for a hug, since Duo had always been open to those.

"Please, no," I whispered into his chest even as his arms came up around me, "I can't go back to that, I can't... Please, please don't leave me, I'll be good, I'll be..."

"Shh. Hush Heero, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said it like that. I won't leave you if you don't want me to and this is the last time I'll ask, I promise. I just needed to know that I'm not forcing to leave everything you've known, that you want to do this. It's going to be hard, but it will be better than this was. I promise, I won't leave you. Promise."

And Duo just cuddled me, putting to rest all the fears that his words couldn't. Treating me like no one else had ever treated me before; like I was precious.

"Heero," Duo asked when I had finally been lulled into a half-sleep, "What got you so scared the other night?"

I simply shook my head.

"Heero, you have to tell me. I know something got you upset and it seems that when you're upset you clean. Something upset you very badly last night. Tell me what it is."

"L-lord J was... upset with me," I told him hesitantly.

"And he's what got you so wound up?"

"I don't like it when he's mad at me. He scares me."

"I won't let him hurt you, you know that."

I nodded, but it didn't seem real. I knew Duo would protect me from anything. I knew Lard J was mad enough to try and punish me. But I simply could not see the two of them fighting over me.

Another thought preyed upon my mind and I had to ask, "Duo... is your hand okay?"

"Huh?" Duo asked, surprised, then it dawned on him, "Oh, that! It's fine. All better, look."

Duo unwrapped his arm to show me that the wound was gone only to leave a quickly fading scar behind. However, the scar itself was very long and I wondered how I could have been so careless.

"Duo, I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay, I know you didn't mean to. It was an accident."

"A-are you going to punish me?" I asked fearfully, knowing that he would be right to do so after what I had done.

Duo fell silent for a moment, then took my face in his hands and turned my head to look him straight in the eyes. His eyes are beautiful, but difficult to read. There are so many emotions that flutter through his eyes, it's hard to pinpoint just one. Looking deep into Duo's eyes, I could see that he was searching for something in mine, but I don't know if he ever found it or not. He pulled back and whispered, "How many people have hurt you, Heero? Is it so hard to believe that I will never hurt you?"

Slowly, yet deliberately, Duo moved forward and pressed his lips to my forehead in a sweet, chaste kiss. I could feel some new emotion flowing through me, making me feel defenseless and safe at the same time. Making me feel warm deep inside, in places that had always been frozen before.

Then he pulled away and the moment ended.

"Come on, let's get some breakfast," he said, smiling. I was loathe to leave the room, but followed anyway.

At breakfast that morning I wasn't able to eat as much as Duo wanted, but I did manage to eat more than I thought. We spent the rest of the morning playing chess in our room, then went down to lunch. After lunch, Duo conned me into helping him with his horse-back riding skills, which were not very good. We both washed up, in what Duo called a "shower", before dinner. Then I offered to give his sore back muscles a massage. It was nice to be able to do something for Duo, even though I was a little awkward because of his wings and, somehow, Duo managed to get me curled up beside him drifting to sleep before I was finished.

The next day was just as good as the one before it. Duo and I both slept in and ended up having a "light" breakfast in our room, even though it left me feeling slightly bloated. Then Duo had Sara give us a tour of the stronghold and the lands around it. I knew every room and corridor of the fort as part of my soldier training, but I had never actually been in most of them. What I had originally thought of as Duo getting a strategical layout of the fort turned into something like a museum tour, as Sara showed us the library, the beautiful gardens and fountains, and the old armors that had been set aside for display in a hall far to the back of the fort. We ended up taking lunch in the gardens with Sara eating with us, though she was a little nervous at first. It was so beautiful and quiet in the gardens, more so because Duo was there, but still beautiful. When we got back it was time for dinner. Duo had us eat and go straight to bed, saying he had something special planned for the next morning. I was curious as to what it was and pestered him about it, but quieted and went to sleep when he winked and said, "It's a surprise." I had never had one of those before, I certainly didn't want to spoil it.

The next day, Duo woke me up earlier than usual, though it would have been considered late only days ago, and pulled me out of bed. We both dressed in warm clothes since it was still a bit chilly this early in the morning. Duo pulled out a beautiful parka with a snow leopard-fur lining to make it warm and dragon hide on the outside to make it strong and beautiful. It was gorgeous, with dark green scales on the outside and pure white fur on the inside. I assumed it was the surprise and thanked Duo, but he only smiled and told me, "Hang on, I'm not done yet." He grabbed a blanket and led me out into the castle and up the stairs to the highest tower in the eastern section of the castle. When we got to the top, he pulled me out the window onto a small ledge. Deftly, he helped me climb using his wings and his tail until we got onto the shingles. He pulled me down to his lap and wrapped the blanket around both of us, then gazed out to the horizon. I followed his gaze just in time to see the sun come up over the mountains and slowly light the forests and lakes below. It may have been the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I wanted to thank Duo, but the sight stole my breath and I couldn't speak. I don't think any words were needed though, because when I looked over Duo wasn't looking at the sunrise, but at me, and he was smiling like he had been given the surprise.

We spent lunch in the garden again, then went swimming in one of the lakes. There were several water fights in which no winner was ever discovered, but we both laughed until we were out of breath. At dinner I ate enough to please Duo somewhat and that night I fell asleep before Duo could tell me to go to bed, even if it was in an armchair reading a book and Duo had to carry me to bed.

Sometime later I realized that Duo was trying to keep me busy so I wouldn't notice how little work I was doing. It worked.

I opened my eyes the next morning to find Duo gone and Sara sitting in one of the chairs.

"Where's Duo?" I asked, alarmed. Sara looked up.

"He got called to meeting with Lord J and couldn't put it off any longer. They were supposed to discuss the dragon's migration pattern a few days ago, but Duo put it off because of his injuries. Anyway, he told me to take you down to breakfast then show you the orchards. Duo said he'd meet you for lunch there."

I was a little disappointing that Duo had to go back to his duties, but I could understand. It wasn't like he was still hurt and I had a strong suspicion that he had taken that time off for me. So how could I complain when he had to get back to his job? Sara and I had a fair morning, the orchards were lovely and overflowing with fruit. Sara even showed me how they made wine and jarred the fruits and vegetables for the winter. It was interesting, but I found myself missing Duo.

"You know, that jacket is beautiful, Heero. Did Duo get it for you?" Sara asked over lunch, moving closer to examine it.

"Yes."

"Oh! Is that snow leopard? Wow, that must have cost Duo a fortune."

"What?" I asked, I'd never thought about the cost before.

"Snow leopards. They're not rare or anything, but they live so far south of here it's hard to get their fur, even though it's so soft and warm. I bet Duo had to pay just to get the fur here, then again for the sewing. But, then again, when you're as important as Duo is you really don't have to worry about it that much. Imagine! Slaying dragons!"

I popped a cherry into my mouth and chewed it slowly, careful of the pit, as I thought of what Sara had said. No one had ever spent much money on me, now Duo was spending tons of it and I didn't even know. It made me think of how stupid I must be, not to realize these things cost money. And all the other clothes that had just appeared in my room must have been bought by Duo too, and I hadn't even realized it. Hadn't realized it, and couldn't understand it.

Something grabbed me from behind. I jumped and spun my head around, the cherry pit lodging in my throat. Duo was standing behind me, a mischievous grin on his face. I coughed and choked on the cherry pit and fell to my knees. Something abruptly pounded me on the back and the pit came loose. I took a few moments to catch my breath, then looked at Duo, who had worry written all over his face.

"I swallowed the cherry pit," I pouted. Soon, we were both laughing.

After lunch, we took the horses for a ride through the forest. It was a wonderful evening, but something was off. I finally realized that I would not be able to spend all my time with Duo like I had been and it made me fear being alone again. I was quiet through dinner and Duo questioned me about it as we went to bed. I tried to tell him not to worry about it, but I knew he was still worried. Still, he let it drop for the moment.


	7. Heero06

Heero POV

I awoke wrapped in Duo's arms that morning, just like I had ever since I took Duo out of the forest, and simply savored the moment. Duo stirred not soon after I awoke and levered himself up on his elbow to see if I was awake.

"Morning," he said, giving me a sloe-eyed smile. I smiled back at him.

"Ohayo goziamasu. Kiyou, doko ni ikimasu ka? (Good Morning. Where are we going today?)"

"Well, I thought we'd go swimming after breakfast again. Then, after lunch, I have to go out into the forest and look for something I dropped. You'll have to stay here, but there's plenty of things for you to do. You could go horseback riding... then again, I'm not sure I want you out riding alone, so maybe you should wait for me. Hmm... no swimming alone either. I'll be back around dinner time, that's a little late for swimming, though. Maybe you could get Sara to go with you... but she's usually pretty busy. You could go to the garden or orchard again. Oh! I heard that there's an indoor garden somewhere around here. Maybe you could go there. Or...

"Duo, why can't I go with you?" I asked

"There are still dragons out there. You'll be safer in here."

"But what if you get hurt?"

"I won't. I promise. I'm just going looking for my scythe, I'm not going to pick a fight with a dragon today. I'll wait for Zechs to come help me this time..."

"Who's Zechs?"

"He's my partner. We were both scheduled to come see what was going on with the dragons down here, but his wife, Noin, had a baby and he wanted to stay with her a little longer. I probably should have waited for him, but I went ahead and left without him. I thought I could handle the dragons by myself."

"You went to fight dragons alone? Baka! (Stupid/Moron!)" I covered my mouth from my outburst, not believing I had just said that. But it was true. How could Duo be so reckless as to go fighting dragons by himself?

I looked up at Duo, who was smirking.

"You're right, it was stupid."

"W-what happened? When you fought the dragon. How were you able to kill it?"

"Heh. You want a story, eh? Alright then, lay back and I'll tell you about it," Duo said, pulling me against his chest. "I was flying low, looking for the dragons. I had a pretty good idea that this group had simply slipped off course because some young, rogue male had taken over them and herded them all too far south. If I killed the male, the oldest female would lead the rest of the females to their nesting ground, that's always how it works. Anyway, I had spotted the male and attacked with my scythe, trying to cut off his head but missed and cut his leg. He roared and called for his females, which I hadn't seen. There were three of them, they all came at me at once, bitting and clawing. I managed to kill them, but that last one managed to get her fangs into me and the male got away. I felt kind of bad about killing the females, they didn't do anything wrong, but there was no way around it if I wanted to live."

I shuddered, "Is that when I found you?"

"Yep. I wasn't sure what you wanted when you came out of the bushes, but I was grateful for the help. Did I ever thank you for that?"

I started blushing.

"You don't need to thank me, someone else could have done a lot more for you. I'm pretty useless..."

"No, you're not. You're very strong and you do as much as you can with what little you have. Thank you, Heero. For more than just rescuing me."

"But, everything else you've done for me. All I did was take you out of the woods. Anyone could do that."

"But would anyone? If they didn't know me? Sure, if they knew I was a demon they'd take care of me because they would be hoping to get something in return. You were the only one that would have helped me and wanted nothing in return," Duo told me, absolutely serious. My blush deepened, "And you've done more than just that. You keep me from doing stupid stuff like that."

"No, I don't. I don't keep you from doing anything."

"Yes, you do. You may not mean to, but you do. And I'm glad you do. Do you know what I'd have done if not for you in the past week?"

"No."

"I'd have healed enough so I could move and gone hunting the dragons again. Without any help or concern for my own life. Now, I have to remember that if I got hurt you'd be sad and if I died, you'd miss me. You would miss me, right?"

I nodded, but didn't want to think about it anymore. I couldn't imagine what I'd do if Duo died.

Duo leaned down gently and kissed me on the temple. "Don't worry so much, Heero. It's extremely difficult to kill a demon. Now, breakfast."

Duo leaped out f bed and pulled me, startled, with him. Laughing, we both ran down the corridor and to the kitchen where Duo pestered Sara to let us help cook our breakfast and she nearly threw him out of the kitchen.

After breakfast we had our swim, in which Duo instigated several water-fights. Now that I think about it, I realize that he was trying to tire me out more than anything, maybe he hoped I'd sleep until he got back. I was ever grateful for the nap we got after our swim, curled up against his chest with not a care in the world.

Watching Duo walk out of the room without me later that morning was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Deep down, I knew Duo was coming back, that he wasn't really leaving me, but at the time all I could see was him waking away without me. It took everything I had not to run after him and beg him not to leave me.

I was so glad he had told me to stay in bed, I don't think I could have taken watching him walk off into the forest, leaving me behind.

After that, I just sort of wanted to be alone. I was worried about Duo and I was dealing with false feelings of abandonment, I just didn't want to have to try and keep up with Sara too. I got out of bed and straightened things up a bit later, but I couldn't bring myself to leave the room, like if I left it would all disappear.

Duo wasn't back in time for lunch, but he had instructed Sara to bring me up something to eat if I decided not to go down to the hall. By that time, I was feeling a bit lonely, so I asked Sara to stay and we ate together. Lunch was nice and, though Sara and I couldn't have the same kind of conversations I had with Duo, we had a nice, subdued chat.

Sara couldn't stay long. I understood that she had other things she had to do, but I was still a bit disappointed to see her go. I decided to keep myself busy by going down to the river to wash clothes.

I sort of enjoy washing clothes in the river. I like being outside and I love the sound of the river, so washing clothes isn't like a chore for me. I like seeing the clothes come clean and, most of all, it gives me time to straighten out my thoughts.

After all the clothes were washed I headed back to the stronghold. The clothes would need to dry on the roof of one of the taller towers were it could get the most breeze. I was tired and hoped to get a nap after I hung the clothes so I would be well rested to greet Duo when he came back. Thinking of Duo's return got me worrying about him again and I was soon lost in my thoughts.

Had I been more alert that day I might have heard the footsteps behind me. But I didn't and I didn't realize I was being followed until someone grabbed me from behind and slammed me into the ground.

I looked up and saw Dekim towering in front of me and realized that Barton had to be the one on my back, reeking of alcohol.

"So," Dekim sneered, "You thought you could get away, did you? Thought you could make us chase you around for so long without ever giving us what we wanted? You're such a little cock-tease!"

I tried to struggle out from under Barton but realized, even with the added weight I had gained lately, he still outweighed me.

All the way out here, no one would interrupt us.

No one would hear me if I screamed.

Duo wouldn't be back for hours.

There was no escape.

I panicked and tried to throw Barton off me with all my might, punching and flailing, but it was no use. Dekim came over and helped Barton hold me down, pulling my shirt off with a loud rip. Barton put his mouth over mine, plunging his tongue deep into my unwilling mouth. In my panic I suddenly realized that I couldn't breathe and bit Barton's tongue, causing him to pull back with a curse and I could breathe again. My relief was short lived, as Barton gave me a harsh slap, whipping my face around so hard I saw stars. Then there were hands pulling off my pants. I kicked as hard as I could and caught Dekim in the shoulder. He grabbed my foot and twisted. I screamed and was sure he had broken it. I realized that my last road to escape had just closed, now I couldn't even outrun them if I got away.

Something in me just deflated and I stopped struggling. Stopped feeling. Retreated back as far into my mind as I could go. Hands finished pulling off my shorts and pulled me to my feet, slamming me against a tree hard enough to bruise my chest. Someone's hand spread my cheeks as two other hands help my arms in a bone-crushing grip, keeping me against the tree.

Then something large pushed its way into me and split me in two. I screamed and screamed until someone slapped me across the face to shut me up. I started having these deep, tearless sobs poor out of me. It seemed like forever before I felt the person behind me shudder and pull out.

I thought it was over, but Barton, who I realized had held me against the tree, pushed me to the ground. I fell on my back and cried out in pain, and then Barton was on top of me, pushing himself into me. But he was worse. He was bigger and his size tore my already bleeding body open more than Dekim had.

"You know you like it," he told me, "It's not like anyone will ever want to do this with you again. You should be grateful, you're so stupid and ugly, no one will ever be able to touch you. We're just generous, so enjoy."

Laughing, they both left me there on the ground and all I could think was, "I have to keep this from Duo. He'd hate me."

Even though my entire lower body was on fire, I managed to make myself get up, pull on some of the wet clothes, since mine had been shredded, and collect the now dirty laundry, though I knew there was no way I could wash it again. I could feel blood running down my legs and as I walked back up to the room, taking the least crowded halls and praying no one noticed the shape I was in. I put the clothes basket behind the door, where Duo probably wouldn't see it if he wasn't looking, then made my way to the showers with a sheet and some fresh clothes. I was thankful for the hot water, even though it stung, knowing cold water would hurt even worse. I was glad to see that the bleeding inside me had almost stopped and I wrapped pieces of the torn up sheet between my legs, hoping to catch any more blood, then put on my fresh clothes.

I was exhausted after that, but even in the bed I couldn't sleep. My body was still on fire and my ankle was in agony. It had to be broken and I worried that Duo would notice my limp. I wanted Duo, I wanted his arms wrapped around me and I wanted that feeling of safety. Eventually, even without Duo there, I drifted to sleep, lulled by the smell of Duo on the blankets.

"Heero? Hey, buddie, c'mon. It's almost supper time," Duo's voice brought me out of my slumber. I pulled my head up and opened my eyes to see him kneeling in front of me. I smiled and tried to sit up, but stopped when a searing pain jolted down my spin.

The memories came rushing back to me and for a minute the real world faded and all I had were those horrible memories, taunting me.

"Heero?" Duo questioned, frowning, "You alright?" I nodded.

"I'm... tired. Could we eat in the room?" I asked. I would have to get up to eat, but at least I could try and keep movement as little as possible. And I wouldn't have to sit in those hard chairs if we were still in the room.

"Sure," Duo told me, but the concern didn't leave his eyes. Duo went to get Sara and tell her to bring the food up, giving me a few minutes alone. I used those few minutes to try and get into a half-sitting position. Sitting was out of the question, it hurt too much. I managed to prop myself up against the headboard, but anything more than that and my pain would definitely be noticeable to Duo. Just sitting up that much had caused a light sweat to break out on my forehead and I hurried to wipe it away.

Duo came in with two trays of food.

"Where do you want to eat?" he asked.

"Here, if that's okay." He smiled at me, an indulgent smile, but still looked worried. Duo started eating as soon as we both got situated, but I found my stomach to be a bit queasy, so I ate slowly.

"So, what did you do to day?" Duo asked innocently, but it set off alarm bells in my ears. If I told Duo I had done laundry, he'd wonder why the laundry was still dirty. If I told him I had stayed in the room all day, he would wonder why I was so tired. Complicating the problem was the pain that refused to stop and wouldn't let me think straight.

"I went for a walk," I told him.

"A walk? That's sounds fun. Where did you go?"

"Just around the castle and near the pond."

"Oh."

"Did you find your scythe?"

"Yep. I put it in the closet, people get a little nervous when they see it. I'll show you it a bit later."

We fell into silence after that, Duo trying to figure out what was wrong with me and my trying to hide the fact that I was in horrendous amounts of pain.

A little later, once we had finished and Duo had cleared away the plates, I found myself with Duo sitting in font of me on the bed, wondering how to get out of a bout of cuddling that I didn't think I'd survive.

"Hey, Heero, what happened there?" he asked me, pointing to a small bruise that peaked out the collar of my shirt.

"N-nothing," I told him, trying to sound calm, but it was already too late, Duo was leaning forward, the concern back in his eyes.

"Let me have a look."

"No, Duo it's fine!"

"Don't be such a baby, Heero," he told me, pulling my collar down and frowning at the huge bruise that covered my chest.

"How did you get this?" he asked, grabbing my shirt and pulling it over my head.

"I... fell. During my walk. I tripped on a log and..."

We both knew it was futile for me to keep talking when my shirt came off. It had been a long sleeved shirt, along with pants, to hide my bruises. It wasn't odd, since it was cold out, but it was a little unusual for me to dress so warmly. I had a feeling Duo knew something was wrong since he walked in the door, he just couldn't pinpoint what.

Duo had murder in his eyes when he saw the marks on my arms, the fingerprints left from holding me down. I was afraid he'd hate me, but I hadn't thought he'd want to kill me, Duo had always seemed so gentle...

Duo grabbed my pants and pulled them down, lifting me by that waist a bit to get them off. I bit down on a cry of pain, but didn't do anything to stop him.

Once I was naked sitting on the bed in all of my bruised and broken glory, Duo backed up. His eyes traveled over me, taking in every mark.

"Who did this?" his voice was like death.

For a moment, I was afraid.

I grabbed the blanket and pulled it around myself, trying to hide the ugly truth.

"Duo, please, I-... it just- they- and I couldn't... I didn't want to... I'm so sorry!" I was so close to tears, but even as I search Duo's face I could find none of his gentleness, none of his soul. There would be no mercy for me.

"Heero, who did this?" he growled, his face contorting in a snarl. I shook my head, it wouldn't help if I told him. The two of them would only deny it and I'd be in worse trouble for lying. But how much worse could dead be?

Somehow, the mere action of shaking my head snapped Duo's control. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me up from the bed, forcing me to stand on my injured ankle. I cried out in pain, but Duo already had us out the door and halfway down the hall. He headed for the dining room, I would most likely get a public execution there.

I was glad I had kept a hold of the blanket when we got to the diningroom, since everyone turned to stare at us and most of them stood, backing away from the irate demon.

"_Who did this?_" Duo screamed so loud that the entire hall shook with the force of his anger and several women fainted. I wondered why it was so important to know who had done this, if the blame would eventually fall to me anyway. No one stepped forward, but it was evident who was to blame since the only two people not to back away were Barton and Dekim, who were so scared that they couldn't move. Duo saw them both and took a step forward, raising his tail. The next thing I knew, there was blood everywhere. Somewhere between the time Duo dragged us in and the time he stepped forward, I had sunk to the ground, my injured body not being able to support me. Dekim was on the ground, screaming and holding the place where his leg used to be. Barton was much the same, only holding his bleeding shoulder. Both the amputated limbs were in puddle of blood on the floor, the arm and leg still twitching spasmodically. My eyes found Duo and I saw that he was smiling with a maniacal rage and was raising his tail for the killing strike. Without thinking, I pushed myself off the floor and lunged at him. My body was so small and weak that it barely made him stumble, but it did make him look down.

I couldn't have cared less if Dekim and Barton died, but I didn't want Duo in trouble.

"No more. Please Duo, no more," I pleaded. Something inside him seemed to deflate as I clung to him and I was happy to see his soul come back into his eyes. In a second, he seemed to come to a decision. He leaned down and took my chin in his hand then leaned down for a long, plundering kiss. I was so surprised by his action that I couldn't think anything but how much better it felt than when Dekim or Barton had done it. Then the kiss ended and he turned from me to the crowd.

"Anyone who harms him will receive a thousand time worse than these two have," then he turned his eyes on Dekim and Barton and the fire returned for a moment, "Don't ever let me see the two of you again."

And then he was pulling me back down the halls to our room, barely controlling his suppressed rage. We got to the room and he pushed me to the bed, mumbling a commanding , "Stay here," before jumping out the window and flying away.

I really can't say whether I fell asleep from the pain, or passed out. Either way, darkness claimed me.


	8. Heero07

Heero POV

Something was moving in my general vicinity. My soldier training was screaming at me to find out what it was, but I didn't dare to wake up. As long as I stayed in the darkness, I wouldn't have to remember what happened. Soon, the thing left, only to return again a bit later and come closer to me than it had before.

Something was touching me, prodding at me, trying to wake me up. Vaguely, I could hear a voice speaking to me, but I stubbornly chose to remain asleep.

It took that voice going from quiet and soothing to loud and worried to get me up.

"Heero, wake up!" the voice told me in what would be considered the normal volume of speaking. I didn't want to, but I obeyed.

I opened my eyes to see Duo sitting in front of my, looking the same as he normally did, not overcome by rage and insanity. For just a moment, I entertained the thought that it might have all been a bad dream. I smiled, then reached out a hand to touch him and shattered that dream to pieces.

A bolt of pain raced down my back and I was forced to believe the truth. I whimpered and pulled back into myself, curling up and trying to make myself as small as possible. Duo was next to me in a second and I flinched, thinking he was still angry.

"Shh. Baby, no. You know I won't hurt you. Come here," he soothed, pulling me out of my ball and into his arms.

So what if it was a dream? I'd enjoy it while I could.

With that thought, I clung to Duo, holding onto him as tightly as I could. I didn't even realize I was shaking until Duo pointed it out to me.

"Easy, babe. Calm down. Look at you, you're shaking like a leaf. Poor thing. We've got to get you cleaned up and looked at."

Duo lifted me off the bed gently, cradling me in his arms. It hurt just to be lifted, but I knew I couldn't walk. Everything hurt more now, even my ankle had swollen worse. Even as gentle as Duo was being, I still whimpered when he lifted me out of the bed and carried me into the room adjoining ours.

It was the first time I had been in that particular room, my earlier explorations having been interrupted. The room was larger than I had thought. It held a large, above ground, tub filled with steaming water in the middle of it, large enough to fit four men easily. Along the wall was a padded massage table with a cart of towels and oils next to it. The room was generously decorated with plants, mainly small trees and vines. The room itself was covered in wood paneling, the floor was white tile. It had almost a tropical look to it.

"Heero," Duo called, "I'm going to put you on you stomach on this table. Will you be alright?"

I nodded and Duo eased me onto the table. Being on my stomach didn't hurt as much as being on my back, but it was still painful. For a moment, I wondered why Duo would want me there, then he began gently peeling away the sheet I hadn't realized I was still wrapped in. I found out why he was pulling so gently when he started pealing it off my lower body. I had bled all over the sheet, the blood had congealed and stuck to my body. Pulling it off my bruised and torn parts was incredibly painful, I found myself whimpering and wheezing in pain by the end.

"You alright?" Duo asked me quietly, I simply nodded. I was sweating from the exertion it took to keep from screaming, but I was still alright.

"This is going to hurt," Duo warned, before picking me up and lowering me into the steaming tub.

I though my skin would melt. It burned and stung, I let out a gasp and sobbed helplessly as my body adjusted to the water and temperature change. Duo moved in front of me, taking my hand and running his other hand down my back soothingly. After a few minutes, I quieted and Duo dared to move away from me.

I was barely aware when Duo slipped into the water next to me, still clad in his boxers, but I was aware when he took me and cuddled me against his chest, like nothing had changed.

It made the pain just a little bit sharper in my battered heart.

"This changes nothing," he told me and I gaped at him, "I will still protect you. I don't care what those... brutes did to you, you're still Heero."

But I wasn't, was I? I wasn't the same Heero Duo had first met, I was... dirty now. Unclean. Filthy. Soiled. Used. Absently, I scrubbed harshly at a spot of dirt on my arm, like I could wash my soul clean. Duo frowned and grabbed my hand.

"Don't," he reprimanded gently, "You're not dirty. They aren't going to beat you like this. I won't let them."

"But I am dirty!" I cried, unable to hold it inside any longer, "Whether it's blood or filth, I've always been dirty! I'm dirty now! And I'm going to get you dirty too! Let me go!"

I stood and tried to push away from Duo, but he had my wrists in an iron grip and wouldn't let go. In a minute, we were both on our feet, spilling water all over the floor.

"Heero, stop!" Duo commanded in a tone that made me stop before I had even made a conscious decision. I deflated and sank back into the water up to my chin, Duo stayed standing above me. He stared at me for a long time before leaning down and taking my face in his hands, forcing me to look at him.

"Anything that's dirty can be made clean again," he told me solemnly, "We're going to clean you up and everything, the blood, the filth, even what they did to you, is going to come off and be washed away in this water. Do you understand?"

I nodded mutely. Duo never lied to me before. If he said the dirt would come off, then it would, as simple as that.

Duo stood and picked up a rag, lathering it with a sweet-smelling soup, then began washing my arms, gently but thoroughly. Then he moved down my chest, then pulled each on of my legs out of the water to wash my feet and my legs. He washed my hair with strawberry-scented shampoo. He even washed the places _they_ had touched me.

The water was darker as it swirled down the drain, more from the blood than anything. I stood next to the tub and watched it go, feeling clean and pure again for the first time in a very long time. I looked at Duo and smiled, he stopped what he was doing and pulled me into a hug against his bare chest.

It was minutes before he pulled away from me, but I could have stayed like that forever. Gently, he took my hand and led me over to the table and pushed me onto my stomach once agin.

"Sorry about this," Duo apologized.

I soon learned that Duo needed to check my insides to make sure there was no internal damage. It was... not pleasant. I was sore all over and his poking and prodding really didn't help. I was grateful when he finished, declaring there to be, "A little bit of tearing but nothing too serious. You should survive."

"Stay here a second," Duo instructed and I was more than happy to oblige. Duo left the room and I had a bit of time to wonder where he had went before he appeared again, carrying a small bag. I watched as he set the bag down and pulled out a small jar and twisted off the top. I strong scent of herbs wafted from the jar and I wrinkled my nose in distaste.

"What is that?" I asked. Duo grinned.

"Nasty smelling, isn't it? But it gets the job done and the smell will fade in a bit," Duo told me before taking a gob of the paste out of the jar and smearing it all over my back.

"Duo, what are you doing?"

"Just wait a second for it to kick in," he told me. I was about to protest when all of a sudden all of the sore and tense muscles in my back relaxed and went numb. I let out a contented sigh before I could stop myself. Duo chuckled.

"I told you it was good stuff. You were lucky I have a friend around here that makes this stuff."

"Is that where you went?" I asked him, too comfortable to be thinking straight. I began to worry when an answer wasn't immediately forthcoming and tried to cover my mistake, "I'm sorry. It's none of my business, I shouldn't have..."

"No, Heero, it's not that. It's just that... I should never have run out on you like that. And I'm sorry. I wish I could go back and change that whole thing."

"What would you do differently?"

"First off, I wouldn't have let those two bastards live," Duo said the venom in his voice startling me.

"Duo..."

"I stopped before because I saw how much I was hurting you, but if I see those two again I'll kill the both of them in a heartbeat. Maybe I should go and find them when you go to sleep..."

"You stopped... for me?" I asked, unable to comprehend the fact.

"Why else would I have stopped? I'm sorry I pulled you around like that. I can't believe I was so stupid. I'm such an ass sometimes. I just have this horrible temper that I can't control sometimes," he knelt to look me in the eyes, "That's why I left Heero. I was worried my temper would get the best of me and I'd do something really dumb. I needed to cool off for a bit, but I should never have left you like that or treated you that way. I'm so, so sorry."

"I-it's alright," I told him. I was having trouble focusing. The things Duo was saying just didn't compute. He did all that for me? No, it couldn't be.

"What am I doing?" Duo asked, a half-grin back on his face, "You don't need this right now. You need me to get back to your massage."

While I was still trying to dissect and pull apart everything Duo had said, his hands started gently kneading my back and lower body. The lotion had numbed everything so well that nothing hurt and all I could feel was Duo's hands on me. My thoughts began to come apart and slowly, I slipped back into sleep.


	9. Duo08

Duo POV

The only thing I wanted to do for the rest of my life was curl up in a little ball around Heero and make it so nothing could ever hurt him again.

Heero had been hurt all his life and had taken more pain than anyone should. A fact that had become all too apparent to me when Heero thought I would beat him for hurting me on accident.

When Heero pushed me and I fell on the knife, I wasn't paying any attention to the pain. All I was paying attention to was Heero's eyes. You see, his face may remain stoic at all times, but his eyes give him away if you know where to look. At first there was only surprise. Then he realized what was happening and his eyes went wide, his pupils dilating with fear. Terror ran through his body and his mind blanked out to protect itself. Acting purely on instincts as old as time itself, he bolted. He fled from me, thinking I would want to hurt him, and hid somewhere he deemed safe.

I knew where he was the whole time. I could feel his location, how far in what direction he was, but I knew that if I approached him before he came to he'd only run off again. So I waited for a few minutes, hastily bandaging my arm and making sure to warn all personnel away from the hall Heero had fled to. I didn't want to be disturbed while trying to coax him down.

When Heero started to come back into his mind and I was sure we wouldn't be disturbed, I began calling to Heero, trying to sooth him out of his hidey-hole. I was hoping he'd make himself known before I reached him, but he didn't. I ordered him to come down, but, truth be told, if he didn't feel safe enough to come down I would have went up after him. Would have spent the hole damn night there if need be. Luckily, it didn't come down to that. Heero came down to me and I held his shaking body until he began to drift off to sleep right there on his feet.

The body has a hard time keeping enough adrenalin in the blood to maintain that kind of panic, so when Heero came of his high, he came down hard. I carried him back to the room that night, knowing he'd let me and not sure if he'd make it by himself.

You see, I have a small advantage over Heero in our relationship right now. When I licked his wound clean in the woods, my main reason for doing it was to seal a spell. Since Heero had cleaned out the dragon bite on my leg he had inadvertently swallowed some of my blood. When I swallowed his blood, I bonded our minds together.

I could feel what Heero was feeling.

The link from his mind to mine allowed me to feel what he was feeling at that time. I could follow the tiny silver thread from my mind to his and better understand what was going on inside him.

Which wasn't much at first.

Heero was so starved, body and soul, that he wasn't thinking on any deeper levels. It was eerie how much he reminded me of a machine, unable to feel, only able to work and follow orders. Only once in a while would I feel a flash of emotion from him, like lightening across the night sky, his emotions were stronger and more visible because of how few of them there were.

On some deeper level, I realized Heero was putting aside his emotions because he was literally starving to death. When he first put me in his bed and laid down beside me I could have wrapped both hands around his middle. I ran my hands down his chest and could count his ribs, one by one. He was lucky if he could get two hours of sleep a night. I almost never saw him eat.

The worst thing in the world for me was to see him begging me to eat even though he was wilting away. Sometimes I would eat a few bites for him, but only because I didn't want him to worry. I could survive a few days without food. As for Heero, I doubted it. If I had been able, I wold have gotten up and demanded Heero be better cared for, but by that time I was suffering from the dragon's poison and it was hard to even stay awake.

Other things came to light after I had taken Heero as mine. Like his complete and utter lack of training in how to deal with normal people, which was demonstrated clearly in Heero's fear of the seamstress. It wasn't that he thought she would hurt him, he had just never dealt with that kind of situation. I still feel guilty that I chose to leave him there like that, even though I knew he was nervous. I wanted to see how he reacted to people if I wasn't there, I thought maybe it would bring him out of his shell a bit. I had yet to see or feel his talking to anyone in the castle except for Lord J, who had hurt him.

Lord J would not hold control of Wing Stronghold much longer, not if I had anything to say about it. I knew it was J who called for Heero to assassinate the ambassador and I even understood his reasons for it. It would be a lot easier to say that an ambassador had been killed than a demon had just disappeared. If the ambassador had gone back to his country with word that the demon had never shown up there would be suspicion of why the demon hadn't shown up which could lead to an investigation. If I had died, there would have been an investigation of Stronghold by the demons, which could have unearthed some secrets that J didn't want to be told. If I showed up, J could simply accuse a band of thieves of killing him or even declare Heero a traitor. I understood J's thinking fairly well, which made me a danger. I spent a lot of time at stronghold worrying about myself and Heero.

However, no matter how much I disliked him, J was not only the only person Heero had interacted with on a regular basis before me, but the only link I had with Heero's past. For this reason alone I tried to remain civil in our meetings, just in case I needed a favor later.

The only person Heero voluntarily interacted with was me. Sometimes he'd talk with Sara, but only short, curt statements. Sara usually had to carry the conversation by herself, which she didn't have a problem doing.

Heero also had problems taking care of himself. If left to his own devices he would only eat when he absolutely had to and he barely ever slept. It wasn't that he was needy, since he had trouble accepting anything other than direct physical contact, and it wasn't that he couldn't take care of himself, since he was the only one who ever helped him. It was just that he was so used to living on that brink of starvation that he couldn't understand it wasn't supposed to be like that. He could not comprehend that it didn't have to be like that. It was like he had been hurt and abandoned so many times that he could only see a world in which we would be hurt and abandoned over and over again, like that was the way it was supposed to be. It took me a long time to get him totally passed that and it all started on the night he made a mistake and I accepted it and didn't punish him for it, on the night he pushed me and I got cut on the knife. I'm not sure that he ever realized it, but the thing Heero gained that night and in the day that followed was hope. Hope that he could be happy. Hope that I would stay with him. Hope that I would protect him. But we had not made enough progress for him to hope that I loved him.

Though I did.

I did, still do, and forever will love Heero. It may have started on those nights, holding his tiny body, watching him struggle against impossible odds, but it continued to grow even after that and what I truly fell in love with was Heero's smile. It's not often that Heero shows any facial expression, so his smiles are especially rare. The first time I saw him smile, really smile, was when I took him to the roof to watch the sun rise. At that time, I had started to learn about just how desolate a life Heero had led, so I managed to keep from wincing when I felt, through our connection, that Heero had never been given a surprise before. Hell, I'd be astonished if anyone had ever given him anything before. I can't read Heero's mind through our connection, only the feelings can come through, but the feelings of awe and astonishment that came through him, then the anxiety, like if he wasn't good the surprise would disappear, those were the kind of emotions little kids gave off. It didn't bode well for Heero's childhood.

Speaking of Heero's childhood, how the Hell does someone go through life and only have a single, threadbare blanket to show for it? Didn't he ever play? Didn't he have any pictures that he could keep? I knew how it was to grow up on the streets with nothing, but even we street-rats were able to keep something. Personally, I had a little yo-yo I had found in the trash. Some of the girls had dolls or brushes. Some even had pictures of what their families were like. To say the least, we each had _something_.

Heero didn't. He didn't have anything. As far as I could see, he'd never played anything before in his life. I had to explain to him three times what the point of chess was before he understood it, and even then only when I explained it as, "tactical practice."

Heero had been a trained as a soldier, then used as an assassin for J. He was stronger than he should have been in the condition he was in. He could ride a horse better than anyone I'd ever seen, including me, but that didn't count since I didn't usually ride horses since I could fly. The point is, Heero had been trained to kill, but he hated death.

He _hated_ death. You could almost see the guilt eating at his soul. See how much it hurt him every time he had to take a life. It ate at him. When he came back to the room that night with the blood of the ambassador on his hands, he was so ashamed that he would have preferred to gnaw his own wrists off than show me what he had done. I wanted to tell him it was alright, but I was uncertain of what his reaction would be to the fact that I could talk. I wasn't strong enough to try and discuss it with him, so I simply removed the blood and pulled him into my arms, showing that I didn't care.

And I did know it was the ambassador's blood on his hands. I could smell it. People from that region of the world live very close to dragons, even managing to domesticate some, so they have a smell of sulfur on them all the way down to their blood. Not so strong as it smells bad, but it is distinctive to them. So I knew that it was unlikely Heero had killed anyone other than the ambassador.

No matter how strong Heero is, he has a tender heart. He hates to see other people hurting, no matter how much pain he's in, and I've already addressed his problem with killing. I wanted to protect that tenderness, that kindness, and I loved Heero, so he was one of the few people that I would do anything to protect.

So when I saw what those two guards had done to him I wanted to pull out their intestines, slowly.

I have a problem with my temper. When someone hurts someone dear to me, I will stop at nothing to get them. When I saw the bruises on Heero's chest and thighs, I could barely see. I my need for revenge was so strong that I couldn't think of anything else. If Heero hadn't had a hold of that sheet I probably would have dragged him down to the dinning hall naked.

When I found Barton and Dekim, I had ever intention of cutting them to pieces one limb at a time. The only thing that made me stop was seeing how upset I had made Heero. The last thing I wanted was to hurt Heero more, but I had to make a lasting impression on everyone present that if they hurt Heero they would deal with me. At the time, claiming him as my mate seemed like the most logical thing to do. Never mind that these people had no idea that for a demon to publicly kiss someone deeply and put their scent on him is the same as a betrothal is to humans, never mind that none of them could smell the scent our link made Heero's body start producing to show that he was mine, and forget the fact that Heero had just been raped, it seemed like a good idea at the time. Luckily for me, Heero was too dazed and trusted me too much to get scared by the kiss, or he may have never trusted me again.

I only had enough of my mind that wasn't filled with rage after that to get Heero back to the room and tell him to stay before taking off to blow some steam. Somehow I led myself to the cottage of an elf I had known when I was young who made the lotion that I had used on Heero, but it still didn't make up for leaving him as I did. I had abandoned him when he needed me most and I couldn't forgive myself for that.

Puling away from my thoughts, I gently lifted the sleeping Heero off of the massage table. He didn't even wince as I laid him down in bed on his side, so deeply asleep with the pain all gone that he wasn't aware of any of my movements. Having slid in beside him, I gently wrapped my wings around his bruised body and pulled him toward me. He sighed contentedly and snuggled into my chest. I could have stayed like that forever.

If it weren't for our mental link, I would have never know Heero was having a screaming, horrible, pee-your-pants nightmare. The day's events had tired me out, though not nearly as much as Heero, and I had been was fast asleep when the nightmare started. It was feelings of pain and terror coming from him through our link that woke me. I sat up and blinked owlishly, then reached down and brushed away his bangs with my fingers, hoping to bring him out of the dream without waking him. Heero had enough trouble sleeping and I didn't want his nightmares to cause insomnia.

There was a tiny crease in Heero's forehead, the only indication something was wrong. He made a tiny sound, a whimper, barely audible but something that equaled a scream in normal people. There was no helping it, I would have to wake him.

"Heero?" I called gently, trying not to startle him, "Baby, wake up."

Heero's eyes snapped open and he bolted upright in bed. After giving him a second to catch his breath, I pulled him back down to the bed beside me and tucked him in next to me. Heero's face may be able to hide everything he feels, but his body cannot. He was shaking when I pulled him down, a light sheen of sweat covering his body. Gently, I ran my hands up and down his back and soothed him. The shivering faded eventually.

"Heero, do you want to tell me about it?"

"No."

"You sure?"

There was no reply, but I felt his anxiety rise just a little bit.

"It's alright if you don't want to talk about it, but sometimes it helps," I said, trying to calm him. Heero debated what I had said for a long time, then replied tentatively.

"I- it was a dream about them. About Dekim and Barton. They were... doing those... things to me again and I couldn't get away. Only, in the dream, you came and yelled at me for letting them... letting them..."

"You know I wouldn't do that," I interrupted, knowing that this was getting to be too much for the dazed and half-asleep boy. I wanted to get his anxiety level back down before he panicked again. "You know I wouldn't let anyone hurt you."

I sat up a bit and looked Heero in the eyes. Heero's lack of faith in the fact that I would never hate him and I would help him no matter what seemed to be the root of the problem.

"Heero, tell me you know that I would never hate you. Tell me," I demanded softly.

"I-I know."

"Say it."

"You-you would never h-hate me."

"Tell me that I would never hurt you."

"You would never hurt me."

"Tell me that I would never let anything hurt you if I had the power to stop it."

"You would never let anything hurt me. Never."

"Good," I said laying back down, but something was amiss.

"Duo," Heero finally said, "there was nothing you could have done to protect me. It wasn't your fault."

"Go to sleep, Heero," I told him, neither confirming nor denying what he had said. No, there was nothing I could have done to help him. Yes, I would continue blaming myself for along time because of it. There was nothing I could do about the way I felt but try to work around it. Strangely, though, Heero's absolution helped ease the guilt a bit, like I had somehow been waiting for him to blame me for what had happened.

He had another nightmare that night, as I knew he would. This time I didn't manage to wake up until he was fully into the nightmare, thrashing and whimpering on the bed.

I grabbed his shoulders and shook him, trying to get him to wake up. Instead of opening his eyes, he went stone still, even holding his breath. There was a moment were everything was completely silent.

In that moment I realized that when Heero woke up he would have a man hovering above him holding his shoulders down. I think I knew that Heero wasn't going to react well to that, though I didn't know what he would do.

There was no warning when Heero flipped over on the bed, pushing me to the floor and landing on my stomach. My tail came up behind me, ready to stab him in the back, but I managed to keep myself from attacking him. His hands came up around my throat, tightening and cutting off my oxygen supply. I realized that, because Heero was a soldier, any movements I made would be interpreted as signs of aggression. So I went limp. I let my body fall lax in his grip, even as little spots began to from in my vision and my ears began to ring.

Just as suddenly as Heero had attacked, I felt his hands disappear and his weight move. Regret and pain flooded the link between us as I gasped for breath. Unconsciously, I turned to my side and curled into a ball, putting Heero at my back. After a few moments, Heero approached me, though still kept his distance. I could feel his hand hovering over my back, like he wanted to console me and make sure I was alright, but it dropped away. I'm not sure if the twinge of disappointment came from Heero or me.

As quickly as I could, I flipped over, still coughing and wheezing, and grabbed Heero's hand. He did this little movement, somewhere between a flinch and a jerk, but didn't pull away from me. I tried to smile at him, but I know that, if I managed it at all, it was a pained smile. After that I started coughing again and Heero pushed me into a sitting position.

"Duo, I'm sorry..."

"No," I ground out, still coughing, "It wasn't your fault. I shouldn't have tried to wake you like that. It was stupid of me."

Heero was quiet for a few moments and I wondered what he was thinking about.

"It was not... appropriate," Heero told me, his voice showing no hint of the anxiety he felt in reprimanding me. Even though that was a pitiful excuse for a reprimand, it went against Heero's training as a soldier, since soldiers never second guessed their commanding officer. It was a big step for him.

I smiled at him, a cheeky grin, but still able to tell him that I approved of what he had said.

"Hey, think we could get back into bed? The floor's not exactly the best place to sleep," I told him. He nodded once and took my arm, helping me back into the bed, then stood uncertainly beside it, not sure if I would want him to get in or not.

"Heero, stop being a stupid head," I told him, snagging his hand and pulling him into bed. I didn't get a smile, but I that sort of lopsided grin that he uses when he's pleased.

I pulled him into bed and, though his mind might have been wary around me once again, his body automatically pressed against mine. It's a wonder that Heero could be so... cuddly with me when he tenses up when anyone else so much as brushes against him. I know some if it was because he had initiated the contact, and some of it came from that fact that for the first few days while he got used to physical contact with me I was too hurt to be any kind of a threat, but that couldn't be all of it. I was all better and he still allowed me to touch him, even after I had treated him so badly after his rape. Even after I had allowed him to be raped.

His mind trusted me a bit, too, but was still having problems understanding me, since I had shown up and turned everything he knew upside down. I think he knew by that time that there was no way that I would let anything hurt him, but he still wasn't sure that I'd want him around. Thus his uncertainty about getting back into bed. The physical barriers were steadily crumbling between us, but the mental ones were much stronger, it would take a while to pull all of them down and put his fears to rest.

Slowly, Heero relaxed and slipped back to sleep. He didn't really have a choice, the combination of his frail state and his injuries, not to mention the mental trauma he had undergone, needed him to sleep and get energy back into his body. Which is why it was vital that he not wake up again. It was getting close enough to morning that Heero might not want to go back to sleep, and I didn't want to have to fight him about it.

When I was sure Heero was in the first stage of sleep, completely oblivious to me but not deep enough to dream, I started sending him feelings of peace and serenity over our link, hoping to prevent a nightmare. I also started monitoring his feelings, in case a nightmare did start, so that I could try to prevent him getting so lost in it. It sounds complicated, but it wasn't. I didn't really even have to think about it.

The only reason I hadn't tried this before was I didn't want Heero to find out about the link yet. If he noticed strange feelings being sent to him He could easily trace them back to me and find the link between our minds.

The link wasn't a one-way deal, Heero could just as easily read my emotions as I could read him. But, also, he could set up barriers to guard his mind, just as I could. Bonds that were older and stronger than ours had a harder time hiding things from each other, since they were more in sync. My bond with Heero was new and weak, Heero could easily put up barriers that I would have a hard time breaking. He could hide the way he felt from me and that could be disastrous.

With a bond so new as ours, I could only feel Heero if I was close to him. The last time I had been out of link distance, Heero had been raped.

I needed to know what Heero was feeling, since he wouldn't and couldn't tell me.


	10. Duo09

Duo POV

Sara knocked on the door gently then opened it without waiting for a reply. She looked nervous, she must have known I wouldn't want any disturbances after what had happened last night.

I pulled Heero closer to my chest, still feeding him peaceful feelings even though he had slipped into a deep, deep slumber. It was late, probably seven or eight o'clock in the morning. If Heero awoke, there would be no way he'd go back to sleep and he would probably want to get up and do something, even though his injuries wouldn't allow it.

Sara had better have a damn good reason for disturbing us.

"M-milord, another demon by the name of Zechs has arrived and wishes to see you."

I cursed under my breath. Of course Zechs had to pick the most inopportune time to show up. Slowly, carefully so as not to wake up Heero, I slipped away from the sleeping boy. He whimpered, which was actually just the tiniest bit of air moving over his vocal cords so light it could have been part of a snore, and frowned, the lines in his forehead compressing just the smallest bit. I ended up putting a pillow in my place and watching Heero clutch the thing gave me the weirdest sense of jealousy.

"Bring Zechs here, I would like to discuss things with him as soon as possible," I told Sara, keeping my voice low enough to let Heero sleep. Sara nodded and hastily left the room.

I would have preferred to meet Zechs somewhere else, but I didn't want to wake Heero and I knew that he had a heart-attack any time I disappeared without warning. I also needed to stay within range of the link, so I could keep Heero's dreams at bay.

Zechs showed up not ten minutes later, his long blond hair trailing behind him, loose, like a banner. His timing could have been better, but, man, was I glad to see him. It was like someone had finally sent me reinforcements in this scary, alternate universe where they starved angles. Zechs immediately pulled me into a strong hug, and damn if it didn't make me feel a hell of a lot better.

"Hello, Duo. You look..."

"Like shit?"

"I was going to say unhealthy, but yours is a rather apt description. And, by the way, who is that?" he ask, pointing to the bed, where Heero lay still asleep, "You haven't been taking strange men to your bed again, have you?" he teased, knowing damn well I had never taken a lover in all the time he'd known me and needing to rub it in.

"Promise not to get too loud and rambunctious and I'll tell you about him."

"Should we take this conversation somewhere else?" he asked and I could only shake my head.

"The hall should be empty, we can talk there."

Zechs frowned; his good humor had been fading ever since the conversation had started. I had the sinking feeling that I was going to be yelled at.

Twenty minutes and one long story later, I was proved right. And was I ever glad that the castle had thick walls. Once Zechs was on a rant, there was no way to stop him, even if it woke Heero up.

"Of all the reckless, stupid, moronic, foolish..."

"Idiotic," I put in helpfully.

"...idiotic things for you to do! You were supposed to look for the dragons, not attack them! You were a scout, not a mercenary! I told you to wait until I got there to try anything stupid. Didn't I tell you not to go on your own if you were going to try and take on the dragons? And linking your mind to someone you didn't even know! What the hell were you thinking? You could have had your mind stolen!"

"By a starved human slave?"

"That's not the point! You can't judge a person by the way they look, he could have been some kind of shape shifter! He could have drained away your blood and put your soul in a bottle for eternity!"

"He didn't even know I was a demon."

"Of course he did! What, the giant black wings didn't tip him off?"

"Zechs, enough," I warned. I wasn't going to stand for him putting down Heero, no matter how stupid I had been.

"Duo," he said, in a more calm manner, "this recklessness of your has to stop."

"I know. I swear, I've stopped. Doesn't the fact that I didn't go back out fighting the dragons again tell you that?"

Zechs heaved a sigh and leaned against the wall. "I was wondering about that. So what's the whole story?"

"I had only gotten to where I found Heero when you exploded. Geeze, I thought I'd at least get to finish. I tell ya, no courtesy at all!"

"Duo, just finish already."

"Well... Since you insist. Heero took me back to his room and took care of me for a few days. After that a couple of goons found me and reported it to their lord and, to make a long story short, I made him give me Heero and moved us both to a better room."

"So Heero is your slave?"

"No! Damn it, don't let Heero hear you say that! What kind of a person do you think I am?"

"Just making sure. Is that everything up to date?"

"If only. I had to leave to go find my scythe, I dropped it in my battle with the dragons and figured I'd better get it before you got here," I clenched my fists in anger, knowing these next words would be hard to get out, "I only left Heero alone for a couple of hours, but a pair of guards here got a hold of him and raped him. He tried to hide it, but I found out and flipped."

"If you care as much about this Heero as I think you do, I'm surprised the fort is still standing."

"Heero made me stop. Damned if I know why, but he didn't want me to kill the two guys that did that to him. Didn't help that I dragged him through the halls with only a sheet on and ran off on him after that."

I shut my eyes and turned around, banging my head against the wall.

"So stupid..."

"Stop it, this isn't helping anything. You did what you could for him."

"But it wasn't enough."

Zechs was silent for a moment, then said, in that dammed evasive tone of his, "I think it was," then changed the subject on me. "How soon do you think we can get rid of these dragons?"

"Subtle, aren't we?" I joked, "Guess you want to get back to that baby of yours, eh? What did you name her?"

"Her name is Mei. And I think getting you out of here is even more important than me."

"Not just me," I told him, jerking my head toward the door.

"Ah."

"From what I saw, we should be able to get the dragons out of here in about a week. All we have to do is get rid of the male, it's a fairly simple..." I stopped mid sentence and headed for the door to my room without another word. I had been so distracted that I hadn't felt the start of another of Heero's nightmares and now it was too late.

I threw the doors open and was at the bed in a matter of seconds. I don't even want to know what Zechs thought of the whole display, but at that time he was the last thing on my mind. I knelt next to the bed, not wanting to have an incident like last time, and called Heero, taking the hand that he had clutching a sheet so hard his knuckles were white. His jaw was clenched so hard the muscles in his neck stood out and his body was stiff as a board. His eyes came open as soon as I called to him and he looked around the room in confusion. Slowly, his confusion faded as I gently stroked his hair with my free hand, not daring to try and sooth him verbally, since I knew Zechs was close by and I wasn't sure how Heero would react. Eventually, he calmed and sat up.

"What time is it?" he asked as he reoriented himself.

"...Early," I evaded, but I could tell he wasn't fooled.

"Duo, the sun's up. It's after nine, why didn't you wake me?" he asked. I could hear Zechs moving around behind me. He closed the doors, then came within hearing distance of us both.

"You need to rest," I told him in a tone that booked no argument. Unfortunately, Heero didn't understand that he wasn't supposed to argue with that tone and I could see him getting ready to protest just as he noticed Zechs in the background. He took a small breath, the equivalent of a gasp, and pulled the blanket up to his chest, a little upset that he was naked in front of a strange man. A strange, very tall, very intimidating man. Right after he had been raped.

"Duo," he growled, "Who is that?"

I could feel that Heero was about to panic. Too many things were coming at him at once.

"Heero, calm down," I told him.

"Duo, move," he barked, ready to get up, "I have to get dressed."

Never mind that he was totally naked and the bathroom was on the other side of the room. Heero was too far gone to even notice that Zechs was between him and the bathroom.

"Heero, you have to stay in bed. You have a sprained ankle and several other injuries that need to heal."

"I am not useless. I am getting up," he told me and moved to do so. I saw him getting ready to stand and grabbed his shoulder, pushing him back to the bed. I realized I had made a mistake when scattered bits of betrayal and grief started coming from Heero.

I could see the conclusions his mind had jumped to. Zechs was a threat. Heero was in a disadvantaged position. Heero needed to get to a better position to defend against the enemy, Zechs. I stopped him, thus I was an enemy. I could understand it, but I didn't have to like it.

"Heero, stop. You need to rest, you're going to hurt yourself!" I told him as he started to struggle.

"Get out of my way," he growled at me, his level of panic rising as Zechs approached the bed. Me, he might be able to overcome if he could surprise me, but he couldn't get passed the two of us.

I think Heero was about to flip out and get violent when Zechs stopped in front of the bed and leaned down.

"Heero," he commanded, "Look at me."

Heero froze, like a rabbit under a hawk, and looked into Zechs' eyes. There was almost a tangible snap in the air and Heero's eyelids drooped and he fell forward in my arms.

I may be able to beat Zechs in a battle on a good day, but that man was a hell of a good psychic.

"Thanks," I whispered as I laid Heero back down, but Zechs wasn't paying attention to me. Slowly, he pulled the blanket down around Heero's torso and gently traced the bruise covered ribs it revealed. I quickly put aside any stabs of jealousy I had and focused on Zechs' face.

"I guess your right," he said at last, "he doesn't look like any threat at all. Come on, let's go get some breakfast. He'll be out until after lunch."

"And the dreams?"

"Gone," he said rubbing his forehead, "but don't ask me to do this again. It took a lot more power than I had expected."

I nodded and followed Zechs to the door. I knew that there would be more conversations and a bit of arguing over Heero's presence, but I had seen the look of protectiveness that had come over Zechs' face. Whether Zechs new it or not, he had already accepted Heero as part of our group. There was no going back, Heero was coming home with me.


	11. Heero10

Heero POV

Over the next few weeks Duo took care of me so well that I would get angry at him. I would get mad at him for not letting me do anything, I yelled and screamed and said horrible things. Then I'd run to him and beg him not to leave, tell him I was sorry, and ask him to forgive me, promising never to do it again. Sometimes I'd tell him that I hated it when he held me, so he wouldn't touch me all day. By nightfall I'd be ready to break down. I would run up to him when no one was around and slam into him hard enough to startle him so that he wouldn't move. He'd fall to the ground and I'd lay on his chest as long as he allowed me. Then he'd kiss me on the forehead and take me to bed; it never lasted passed sundown.

It seemed like I couldn't live without him holding me at night and sometimes, when I realized how close we'd gotten, I'd become so afraid that I just had to push him away.

I started going from bouts of insane anger to horrible guilt and fear. All these emotions were so new and strange to me, I couldn't understand them. I didn't know why I was so mad at Duo and, when I would even mention my rape in anger, he would get this look of total self loathing and I would nearly die. How could I bring up something that I knew Duo felt guilty about when he had done so much for me? I was so afraid that he would finally give up on me and leave, but some of me wanted him to go, to prove that everything I knew was true. That I was nothing.

It didn't help matters that, while I was getting more sleep than I had before Duo came, I was only getting a maximum of six hour a night, sometimes less. I had nightmares all the time. Many were about Dekim and Barton, but more of them were about my past. Some were dreams where I would find my hands soaked in blood. It would ooze down my arms and legs until it covered me totally and I suffocated. Sometimes it was of my childhood, when I was trained by Lord J. He would come home to find that I hadn't completed my chores or my training exercises, it didn't matter which, and he would hit me and yell at me, telling me I was worthless and he should have never taken me. Calling me ungrateful and useless. Sometimes the dreams weren't even really nightmares. I would be back in my room when I trained under Lord J. he would have me reading books or doing questions, maybe even exercising outside. Either way, I would either look out a window or over my shoulder and see a bunch of kids playing. In the dream, I'm only eight or nine years old. I watch the children, but usually don't approach. The one time I did approach them, they all fell down dead.

Duo usually wakes me from these dreams, though he's been cautious about it since I attacked him. I was so scared when I saw that I was choking Duo that I forgot to even let go for a moment. He was nearly blue when I did release my grip. I was so sure that he would never want to see me again, I couldn't even touch him. How far, I wondered, can I possibly push him before he gives up?

He didn't give up then and he hasn't given up yet.

Things were different once his partner arrived. He and Duo went out every day to search for the dragons, but they hadn't found them. Even though it took Duo away from me for most of the day, I hoped he never found the dragons. I knew Duo didn't like stronghold, so chances were slime that he'd stay with me. If he found the dragons, he leave me and go back to the place that he come from.

"Hey Heero," Duo called me, entering the room, "Whatcha doin'?"

I hmmed a response and didn't look up, even though I really wasn't paying attention to the book I was reading. Duo came and sat on the bed next to me, his hands carefully running over my ankle. I was laying on top of the blanket, so he could easily feel the difference in swelling. I had only walked to the shelf to get a book, but it had only been a week since Duo had told me my ankle was sprained, not broken as I had thought, and I wasn't supposed to be walking. Duo frowned as his fingers found the growing lump above my foot, gently pressing down then releasing.

"Heero, you know you shouldn't be walking yet."

I made no reply. Duo sighed and continued, "Your going to make it worse. You don't want to have to be off you feet longer."

"I can walk to the bookshelf and back, Duo. I am not disabled."

"I never said you couldn't, I said you shouldn't. You need to heal, just like anyone else would. You're not a god, Heero."

"I will be fine. Stop pampering me."

"And why can't I pamper you? It's not like it'll hurt you."

"It will make me weak."

"What will? Healing? Letting your body recover from malnutrition?"

"You make me weak."

"How?"

"By making me want things I cannot have. By showing me things I wasn't meant to see."

"And why weren't you supposed to see them, Heero?"

"...They will hurt me."

"Heero, I won't hurt you."

"You wouldn't, intentionally."

"Heero," he said, taking his face in my hands. It was the first contact we'd had all day, since I had pulled away from him in the morning when he was leaving, and it tingled on my skin. "I will never hurt you. I will do everything in my power to stop it. You have to try to believe me."

And I broke. I dropped the book I had been reading and lunged into his arms, which were, as always, open and waiting. I was so scared that someday Duo would find the dragons and I would wake up to a cold, lonely bed in a small closet again. So scared that I wouldn't be able to shut everything down again. That I would have to live every day like that.

I didn't think I could do it.

Once the shaking in me had stopped and Duo had held me until I felt warm inside again, he started talking to me. Not talking about anything important, just talking.

"Say, Heero, how far in these woods have you been?" he asked, not expecting or receiving an answer, "Not too far, I guess, they probably kept you pretty close to the castle. Man, they have this super waterfall at the end of that river out there! It must drop a hundred feet! I'll take you to see it sometime, huh? Noin will want to see it when she gets here. Did I forget to tell you? She's Zechs' wife. They usually partner together, but it's kinda hard to do when your in labor so she took this mission off. Sally's a doctor, she's comin to look after the baby while we're all out hunting the dragons. Quatre's coming too. He's a great guy, you'll like him, he's desert raised and he's got this awesome blonde hair. I hope Noin's baby has her tracking skills. Noin can find a dragon in five minutes in the dark. She's so cool. Then it usually only takes Zechs and me a couple of minutes to get rid of the problem. Hilde's good at tracking down dragons, too. I don't know, maybe it's a girl thing. Then again, both Hilde and Noin learned to track from their fathers so that doesn't make any sense either. Oh well. Hey, babe, you okay down there? You're holding on kinda tight. Everything alright?"

I nodded, but I wasn't. Duo was going to leave me. It was strange. I didn't feel sad, or angry, or anything. I just felt... empty. My worst nightmare come true, and I felt nothing.

"Why don't we go down and get some dinner?" Duo asked, plastering his trademark grin across his face. "As long as you let me help, you shouldn't hurt your ankle."

I briefly considered pinning Duo to the bed for the rest of my life, but disregarded the plan as impossible. I didn't want to move, but realized that Duo's stomach was growling under me and he probably hadn't eaten since breakfast. Slowly, I disentangled myself from Duo. He got up, giving me a smile, and stood next to the bed. I got to my feet and let him hook one of my arms over his shoulder, taking the weight off my injured foot. In this way we walked down to the dining hall. I was almost glad for my injured ankle, otherwise I would never have allowed Duo so close in public.

Halfway through dinner, a servant came rushing into the hall to announce a group of people were approaching. Zechs immediately stood and went out to meet them.

I had mixed feelings about that man. I didn't know him well enough to trust him, but Duo liked him and he had never tried to hurt me. I'm not sure that he liked me, I tried to stay as unobtrusive and quiet as I could when he and Duo were conversing, but I think that only made it worse. It didn't help any that my first memory of him was this strange, dream-like picture of his eyes then everything went dark.

Zechs came in about twenty minutes later with a black haired woman with a baby, a blonde haired woman, and a blonde man. It was easy to match names to the description Duo had given me, though I was glad to see that the blonde woman didn't have wings and was obviously human. I had been worried that I might not be accepted by Duo's friends because I was not a demon, that put some of my fears to rest. The blonde man had white wings with gold-tipped feathers. It was very beautiful and it made a perfect picture with his fair skin and blue eyes. The dark haired woman had deep navy blue wings, and all I saw of the baby was that it was a girl and had brown hair.

I felt my heart drop when Duo left the table to go join them and play with the baby. I sat back in the corner, watching, but not interacting other than when one of them came up to introduce themselves. A startling thought came to me out of nowhere. "This is how it's going to be from now on."

Duo left at nearly dawn the next morning, saying dragons move slowest in the morning since they were cold-blooded. He warned me, as he always did since the incident with the guards, not to go anywhere alone. He locked the room's door from the inside when he left.

Alone, lying there on the bed with nothing to do but contemplate how alone I was going to be in the future, despair hit me.

I nearly threw the door open when I heard a knock, ignoring my ankle in favor of something more distracting. I didn't even bother to find out who was on the other side.

Master J stared me in the face as soon as the door was opened and I wished that I could have turned back time and kept myself from being so stupid.

"The demon will hurt you," master J told me, "I can keep you from being hurt like that."

I knew he was talking about retraining me, something I had feared in the past, but, at that time, all I wanted was to stop hurting. It was like hanging a bone in front of a starving dog. Nothing mattered. Without even thinking about it, I nodded and followed Master J down the hall and into hell.


	12. Duo11

Duo POV

I knew something was off before we even reached the castle walls. It hadn't started a good day, but it kept steadily getting worse. First we found fifteen female dragons holed up in a cave without the male anywhere in sight. Then Zechs discovered that one of the dragons had a gold ring around her tail, which meant she was tame.

The only people that had managed to domesticate dragons were the Chinese. The dragons originated in the deepest tunnels on earth, burrowed though the Tibetan mountains into lava pits deep underground. The Chinese had been around the dragons longest, it was only natural that they knew the most about them. It was also said that they produced some of the best sorcerers in the world because of how much they mingled with the dragons, but that could not be proved. Sorcery in China was severely forbidden, believing that it took power away from the gods.

Usually dragons would spend the summer in China then migrate to Australia for the winter. It wasn't uncommon for a young male dragon to overshoot his return and end up in Mongolia, Kazakhstan, or even Russia. It wasn't a complete surprise that the dragons ended up at Wing, it was only a few miles away from the borders of Mongolia, China, and Kazakhstan. Usually it was a simple matter of removing the male so the females would fly back to the mountains, and far away from any people they could injure.

However, a tame female could not get lost; it had to be stolen. Which meant the other dragons had to be some kind of illusion, possibly changelings, creatures that could change shape at will but gained no extra powers. The changelings would hide the presence of the other dragon, it was suspicious to see a female dragon alone since they always traveled in groups. Which meant that someone had done a lot of planning to steal the dragon and must have had a good reason.

I just prayed the reason wasn't war.

China and Russia had an alliance, not exactly a friendship, but a mutual respect. China revered the dragons and, though they were used to help make food for the rising population, were cherished above all other animals. The Chinese would rather lose a thousand men in battle than one dragon. And I worked directly under the ruler of Russia, Treize. We had been friends for several years, he and Zechs had been friends for like forever. He hadn't told either of us about any plans to attack China, so I knew there were none. Besides that, Treize hated unnecessary killing and would only go to war if he absolutely had to.

Which meant that someone was planning war and it wasn't us or China.

On top of all that, we had discovered about two hundred eggs in the cave and there was no way to tell a real dragon egg that was fertile, a real dragon egg that was not fertile, and an egg from a changeling apart. Which meant that all of them had to be chipped apart, since they were covered in a sticky substance that dried like cement, and taken back to the capitol along with their mother. That could take weeks. Then they would all have to be returned to China, which would require Treize to go there as a figure of good-will. Then there would be an investigation and a lot of suspicion. Things were going to get a bit strained soon.

Needless to say, all I really wanted to do when I got back to the stronghold was curl up with Heero and pretend that this whole mess was not going to happen. But I knew that wasn't going to happen when I got within range of our link.

Because I was so far away, the feeling were fuzzy, and I wasn't looking for them so I didn't notice them for a while. When I did notice them I realized that Heero was scared, terrified even. He was so scared and in so much pain that he was systematically shutting down his mind, piece by piece, in order to get away from it.

I was so surprised I almost fell out of the air.

I turned on as much speed as I could. I had to get there and find out what could possibly be hurting Heero so bad, what the hell was going on. I knew he had been a bit upset when my friends had shown up, but he'd get used to it. I was hoping he'd talk to me, but I never thought it was more than just a bit of nervousness. And if it was more I thought he'd at least tell me. I knew it couldn't possibly be causing as much pain as Heero was putting out.

In the back of my mind, I realized that Zechs, Noin, and Quatre had all sped up with me and were probably wondering if I had lost my mind, but I was so focused on Heero that I didn't bother with them.

I didn't land until I was nearly at the door. I must have startled the hell out of the men guarding the outer wall, cause I flew in and knocked one's hat right off his head. Looking back, I'm really glad the front doors had already opened, because I probably would have crashed right through them. Sally was already at the door with Mei to meet us, but I didn't stop for her. She gave me a worried look when I rushed by, but didn't follow because of the baby. I knew she'd come to see what all the commotion was about once Noin had the baby settled. Zechs and Quatre followed me immediately.

I could tell right away that Heero was not in the room. From what I could feel he was in the damn dungeon! As I got closer I could hear Heero screaming and it scared me. Heero could barely show when he was in pain, for him to be screaming it must have been insanely bad. I followed his screams since they were easier to track than our link and, to tell the truth, I was too angry to think straight. My feet pounded the ground and I skidded around corners and down passages until I singled in on one door. I grabbed the handle and pushed, ready and willing to break the thing down if it was locked. The door slid open easily and slammed off the wall beside it.

The room was empty except for Heero, huddled in a corner, who looked unharmed. I took a deep breath in relief, the adrenalin that had ben invading my system dissipating. Zechs and Quatre came up behind me and I could see the questions on their faces.

Heero started to scream again. The three of us all had the same feeling of need to protect someone we had accepted as our own, so we all moved to see what was the matter with Heero at once. It was dark in the room, so it was difficult to see, but it was clear when Heero plastered himself against the wall, backing away from us and screaming in terror.

Heero was afraid of _us?_

I took a deep, calming breath. Damn, that hurt. And I was more confused than ever. Why would Heero be afraid of us? I realized that I had to find out, but Heero was so scared of the three of us he'd probably have a heart attack if we all moved at him again.

"Guys, wait outside, I'm gonna see what's wrong with Heero," I told them. I could see that they were both as hurt and confused as I was, but they nodded and obeyed, bringing me a torch so I could shut the door.

Moving slowly, I put the torch in a holder on the wall and looked around the room. It was small, with no light, meaning Heero had been submerged in total darkness. Even the torch only managed to cast long shadows and dim lighting.

The cell was pretty standard, rough walls and a dirty floor, nothing to be afraid of. So what had Heero so scared? I had never seen him like this. He stood, back pressed up against the wall as far as it would go, watching me like I was a snake or something. I could see him shaking and hear his deep, sobbing breaths from the other side of the room. Slowly, I approached him. He slid away from me, keeping his back to the wall, every time I took a step toward him. Finally, I got him backed into a corner, and he did the last thing I ever thought he'd do.

He sat down on the floor and cried. Really cried.

It hurt so bad to see him there and know that, in some way, I had caused it.

I was scared. So scared. I knew something was wrong, something was hurting him, but I couldn't fight it, I couldn't find it. When I get scared, I get angry. I have personality flaws like that. I couldn't help it. I grabbed Heero by the arms and pulled him out of the corner. He struggled like I was the devil, but I was still stronger.

"Heero, what the hell's the matter with you?" I ground out, but Heero couldn't hear me over his own fear. I could feel the pulse in his tiny wrists racing, but ignored it. It had to be him, had to be some kind of joke. Something. "Damnit Heero! You're scaring me! Knock it off!"

I knew I was out of control, that I was only scaring Heero more, but I couldn't help it. Never in my life had I expected Heero to react so strongly to anything. I was just getting used to how much he had on the inside and how little he showed on the outside, when he did this. I grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him hard, his head pitching back and forth as I tried to get him to knock it off. All of a sudden he couldn't seem to take it anymore and let out a scream that raced through my bones and chilled my very core. I let go of him like he was on fire and he scuttled back into his corner, pulling his knees up to his chest and protecting his head with his arms, like I would attack him.

I took a moment to calm my racing heart. Heero needed me to be calm and gentle, not half as crazed as he was. Slowly, I sat down in front of him and tried to look small and meek. I don't think it worked, because when I reached out to touch him, he cringed away. I realized he was muttering something under his breath, but I couldn't catch it.

"Heero? Heero, tell me what's wrong," I asked him softly. He simply cringed and started muttering faster.

"Heero? Heero, please, it's me, Duo," I told him and finally got a response. He froze, his head coming up just the tiniest bit, a hint of blue showing from behind his bangs.

"D-Duo?" he asked in the tiniest whisper.

"It's me," I told him, daring to reach out and lightly rub my fingers over his hand, "It's me."

And that was all it took. In a moment, I had an armful of Heero sobbing brokenly into my chest. Slowly, I put my arms around him and pulled him into my lap. Tears cascaded down his cheeks and my shirt was soaked within minutes.

"....please. Don't let them get me... don't hurt me, don't let them hurt me... no more, can't take more... sorry, so sorry... dirty, get it off me!... what did I do?... don't, can't make me, don't want to... don't let them hurt me!... alone... no! Not alone! Please, not alone!..." his litany continued, unstopping, unshaken by his tears, barely understandable. I wanted to stop him, to ask who did this, who was going to hurt him, but realized that he was too far gone to answer me anyway. Careful not to startle him, I ran my hands over his body, assessing that he was not physically injured in any way. As for his mind... I could only hope that he was alright.

A small knock sounded on the door, but the whole place could have been hit by a catapult by the reaction Heero had. He gasped and jumped behind me, hiding behind my wings. The knock came again and the door opened before I could reply, revealing Sally. She stepped into the room. Heero cowered behind me, using me as a shield. Sally looked from Heero to me, confusion and concern growing on her face.

"I heard there was something was wrong with Heero," she told me.

"Don't listen to her!" Heero whispered shrilly, looking at me with pleading eyes. Sally frowned, more confused than angry.

"I don't know what's going on," I told her softly, reaching to run my hands reassuringly though Heero's bangs. Sally nodded once, her eyes taking on that serious light that they get when she's in doctor mode.

"Bring him out into the light, I can't see him in here."

It was a bit of a struggle to get Heero out of the cell, he was so scared that his legs wouldn't hold him. I ended up just sweeping him off his feet and carrying him out the door. Once Heero was in the light we had some problems again. Heero didn't want anyone but me near him or touching him. While Zechs and Quatre left without too much fight, I needed Sally to stay and help me figure out what was wrong with Heero. More than that, we had to get his clothes off so that Sally could examine him.

Heero's shirt came off pretty easily, since I grabbed it without letting him on to what I was about to do. It was plain to see that he wasn't going to react well to being naked in front of someone he didn't want to be around, but I couldn't just leave him alone. I didn't have any idea what to do, I was praying that Sally did. Heero looked up at me with those innocent, confused puppy eyes as I held his shirt in my hand and I had the overwhelming feeling that I was about to do something terrible. I wanted so badly just to wrap him up in a giant bubble and fly him away from all this, but I couldn't. It almost broke my heart.

I reached for the waist of his pants and he caught on; Heero is anything but stupid. He grabbed my hands and the tears, which had been coming nonstop, started gushing again.

"Please, no. Please, Duo I'm so sorry! Please, please! I don't want to do that! I-I'm s-sorry please! I didn't m-mean to! I-I c-can't..." his sobs were coming so hard that he couldn't speak and simply bowed his head against my shoulder.

"Heero," I said, swallowing so I didn't start crying too, "Heero look at me," I said and tilted his head to look into my eyes, "I won't let you be hurt. Sally's going to help you, but you have to trust us."

Heero looked over his shoulder, then leaned forward and cupped his hand around my ear in a childish gesture of seclusion, whispering, "That's not Sally."

I stared at him, open mouthed, for almost a minute. Sally must have heard him, because she had the same confused look I was wearing. I wanted to contradict him, to make him see how crazy what he was saying was, but I knew it wouldn't help. Instead, I leaned forward and rested my forehead against his, shutting my eyes.

"Trust me," I whispered. Heero looked at me, still afraid, but nodded and I was once again amazed by his courage. His faith in me was nothing short of scary.

Before he could change his mind, I pulled the rest of his clothes off, putting my wings around him so he didn't get chilled. Sally stepped forward and touched him, just touched his arm, and he squeaked and tried to hide behind me again. I was ready for it this time, and caught him in a hug, both to keep him calm and to keep him from running away.

Sally's examination was quick, though her eyes nearly popped out of her head when she took his pulse. In the end she was frowning and looked more confused than ever. I felt panic inside me rise, a feeling of dread washing over me. She had to know what was wrong with Heero, she had to.

Sally stepped back for a moment, her eyes trailing over Heero's shaking form. Heero had stayed quiet through the whole ordeal, though he flinched every time Sally spoke or touched him. Nervously, his eyes flicked over to Sally then back to me.

Sally must have caught something in those eyes, because she struck like a snake, grabbing Heero's face and forcing him to look at her. Heero screamed and frantically tried to get away, but I had a good hold on him and he wasn't thinking straight in his panicked state.

"Oh god no!" Sally muttered her eyes taking on a look the I definitely did not like. "Duo, hold him here. I have to go get something," she said and was out the door. Heero whimpered, turning back to me and burying himself in my arms. I helped Heero back into his underwear, figuring it would be better to have to take them off again than embarrass Heero in front of everyone.

I didn't know how long Sally would be, so I pulled Heero to the floor with me and sat him in my lap, tucking his head under my chin and holding him against my chest. I rocked him gently and he soon fell into a sort of daze; too tired to stay awake, but to wired to go too sleep.

Heero jolted awake with the return of Sally, only a few minutes later. He frowned, tightening his hold on me. Heero's eyes immediately went to the needle and vile in her hand, he started to pant in fear and his pulse, which had been calming, shot back up. Then he turned those big blue eyes on me.

"Duo, please... don't let her. Please... don't let her hurt me," he said and I shushed the litany that was ready to start pouring out of him.

"Duo," Sally said, grabbing my attention. Her eyes were hard and I could tell we were about to do something none of us would like. "Hold him still," she finished and I wrapped Heero's body in my arms, immobilizing him.

Sally grabbed Heero's hand and he let out a scream that reverberated through the room. He kicked, struggled, and tried to get loose, but couldn't. In the end, it was his tears and his quiet begging for me to save him that hurt me so much. I tried to calm him, tried to sooth him, but it was like there was a barrier between our minds. Inside him was only fear and pain.

Sally pricked Heero's finger with the pin, collecting the tiny drop of blood that formed there, then exited the room, closing the door softly behind her. I released Heero, realizing that I would only scare him more by holding him down. He immediately got up and I felt a pang of regret, thinking he had stopped trusting me. Heero went to his corner, surprising me by reaching over and tugging me there with him. I curled up with him on the cold floor of the room, listening to the soft sobs coming from his body, in the shadows of the room.

The next time Sally opened the door Quatre and Zechs were with her. Heero didn't even bother to look up at them, just buried himself deeper in my chest.

"Duo," Sally called softly, "I need to speak with you for a moment. Alone," she added sadly.

I rose, biting my lip and knowing how much this was going to hurt Heero, and made to follow her. Heero followed like a puppy at my heals the whole way to the door, where I turned around before Zechs and Quatre could grab him and frighten him.

"Heero, I have to go with Sally for a moment," I cannot tell you the depth of the pain that came into those two, beautiful blue eyes, "Just for a second. I'll be back before you even know I'm..."

"No! No, don't leave me, please! I'll be good, I promise. I'll do anything! Duo, Duo please! I-I can't... They'll hurt me! Duo you-you have to stay! I can't-can't lose you too! Please! Don't leave me! Not alone! Don't leave!"

I couldn't keep a tear from falling down my cheek as I backed away from Heero. Quatre and Zechs held him back as he tried to follow me, but he struggled as hard as he could, his eyes glued to me. It wasn't until the thick wooden door of the dungeon began to swing shut that I saw despair creep into his eyes. He really though that I was never coming back.

"Make this fast," I growled at Sally. She nodded and began, the way she always does, bluntly.

"Heero's not crazy. Somebody gave him a drug called Hell. It's a hallucinogen. It makes people see and hear thing that aren't happening and twists things that are. It also multiplies that pain inflicted by any wound increases a person's heart-rate dramatically."

Red invaded my vision.

"Are you telling me that someone purposefully did that to Heero!"

"Don't you dare do this, Duo Maxwell!" Sally's sharp reprimand hit me, bringing me back to myself as I met her accusing stare, "Heero needs you. You! Not the Shinigami! You're the only person he trusts, the only person he knows won't hurt him. It's up to you to keep him calm and help him through this. If you abandon Heero now you'll be worse than the person that did this!"

She was right and I knew it, so I nodded.

"What should I do?"

"Take him some where you can make him feel safe. Keep him calm. You need to get him to drink something or he'll get dehydrated from all those tears. I'll bring something up later to make him drowsy, but he can't have sleeping drugs or he'll have nightmares worse than any he's had before and he won't be able to get away from them. This should only last twenty-four hours, but it's critical that you be with him. So go!"

And with that I was bolting back down the hall to Heero. I threw open the door to his cell and found Heero huddled in a corner, Quatre kneeling next to him, trying to console him, Zech standing guard next to the door. Quatre always tried to be friends with everyone and he'd never had anyone be frightened of him off the battlefield before, so I know Heero's fear hurt him quite a bit. Zechs was more of a soldier, so it didn't affect him as much, but I could still see it hurt.

Heeros' eyes lit up with joy, hope, and relief the minute he saw me and he bolted across the room, and threw himself into my arms sobbing again. I lifted him in my arms and walked out of the room without any explanation to the other two; I figured Sally would handle it. It seemed like one minute we were in the dungeon, the next we were in front of the door to our room. Quietly I opened the door, Heero had fallen into his half-sleeping state again, and laid him on the bed, keeping a hold of his hand as I curled up beside him. Heero immediately curled up against me, too tired to be scared, and fell asleep in my arms. I watched the sunset through our window.

It might have just been me, but there seemed to be something foreboding about it.


	13. Duo12

Duo POV

Something poked at my arm, bringing me back form the warm, comfortable sleep I had been in.

"Duo," I recognized Heero's voice, "Duo, I have to go to the bathroom."

"Hmm? Go on..." I moaned, loosening my hold on him so he could get up. His arms were suddenly clasped around me very, very tightly and I gasped, coming fully awake. I looked down at his form pulled tightly against me and the memories came flooding back.

It took me a second to get my head around everything that had happened and when I came back to myself I was sitting up in the bed with Heero sniffling quietly, his head resting on my knees.

"I-I don't have to go that badly," he sniffled and I smiled sadly. Heero's bladder was probably about to burst for him to ask me, especially in this condition.

"Come on," I told him gently, "I'll take you."

Heero had a death-grip on my hand as I led him to the bathroom, like he thought I'd run away as soon as I got the chance or something. It was only a few steps until I stopped in front of the bathroom door.

"Go on, I'll wait right out here for you."

Heero still looked hesitant, keeping his eyes on the floor and a grip on my hand.

"Heero?" I asked after a few minutes of him remaining.

"Y-you'll wait right here?" he asked, sounding meek and uncertain. Damn, this was going to take a bit of getting used to.

"Of course. I promise, I won't move."

Reluctantly, Heero let go of my hand and went into the bathroom, closing the door with a soft click. It was about twenty seconds before a I heard two hasty steps and the door was thrown open again, a very frightened looking Heero standing in the door way.

"Heero? What's wrong?" I asked, though I was pretty sure I knew. Heero looked sheepishly at me, his fear fading for the moment.

"I-I thought I heard you move."

"I'm not going anywhere," I told him and he receded back into the room, again closing the door with a soft click. It was another twenty seconds before I heard a hesitant, "Duo?" from behind the door.

"I'm right here," I called and continued to call every twenty to thirty seconds. It seemed like everything was going fine, until I heard Heero call a shrill and panicked, "Duo!" from inside the room.

I was through the door without a second thought. Heero was sitting in the corner again, knees drawn up to his chest, shaking like a leaf.

"What's wrong?" I asked, bending down with an unnerving sense of dei-ja-vou.

"I-I'm sorry. I c-can't stand it! The walls are crawling with bugs and vermin! I can't stand it! It won't come clean! There are skeletons on the floor and they move when I come near them and..."

Shit! The hallucinogen! I totally forgot that Heero would have hallucinations.

"Shh. It's ok, it's alright."

"Sorry. I'm a pain. You should just let me die."

"I won't let you die, now stop it. You have to be brave, you have to ignore all of it. Just don't even look at it. Come on."

I pulled Heero to his feet, but he wasn't able to ignore the visions. As we walked across the bathroom he would suddenly jump to avoid something or swerve around nothing so he didn't have to step on it. He looked around the room, his eyes darting from place to place. By the time we had traveled the few feet across the bathroom, Heero's fingers were about to puncture a hole right through my skin. I didn't dare say anything, Heero seemed like he was about to break down and start crying again and I didn't want that.

Heero stopped in front of the toilet and, to my utter mortification, didn't even realize, or didn't care, that he hadn't let me go. I averted my eyes and ignored it, we had already seen how badly Heero reacted when he wasn't in skin to skin contact with me. I was really trying to count every leaf on the potted fern in the corner when Heero made the squeaking noise he makes when he's in distress and attempted to back up. He couldn't, since I was right behind him, but it was difficult to see what could make Heero so afraid of a toilet.

"Duo, we have to leave. I can't...it's _them_!"

"Who?"

"_Them_! The ones that... they made me... D-Dekim and Barton and I can feel them..."

Shit! The rape. Dammit, no wonder Heero was petrified, having his groin uncovered, even with something as simple as going to the bathroom, must have been terrifying mixed with the drug induced hallucinations.

All I could do was put my arms around Heero's shoulders, put my face right next to his, keeping my eyes closed of course, and hope that the close proximity helped as it had before.

"J-just ignore it Heero. Just pretend it's not there."

God, I felt so helpless.

By the time Heero was finished he was shaking so much that couldn't even get his pants back up. I had to do it for him, but I was passed the point where I could let modesty get in my way. The moment he was fully covered, Heero turned around in my arms and latched onto my neck, the water-works going full blast. Knowing that he needed me to be strong for him was all that kept me from breaking down myself.

All I could do was pick Heero up and carry him back to the bed. I held him and rubbed his back, talking to him in soft tones until sleep claimed him and even after.

It wasn't long before I heard hushed voices outside my room, but I didn't want to move in case Heero woke up and waking him up wasn't even an option. I didn't have to worry about it long, though, the door opened just a crack and Sally peeked in. I nodded and waved her over, she came in and closed the door barely making a sound. When she spoke, it was in hushed tones.

"Duo, did you get him to drink anything yet?" she whispered and I could only shake my head. "Has he gone to the bathroom lately?" she asked and I felt a deep, belated blush rising to my cheeks. Sally laughed, but managed to keep it quiet. "Don't be embarrassed. Heero's helpless right now with the hallucinations you'll have to help him with just about everything. For now, let's get him to drink something. I'll be back at the twelve hour mark to get another blood sample so I can be sure the toxin is making its way out of his blood."

She then disappeared out into the hallway and came back just a few seconds later with a large glass of water. She set it on the night-stand, then leaned over and gingerly placed her fingers on Heero's forehead.

"For now, just keep him calm and get him to drink something. Be careful he doesn't develop a fever," she told me, then she left. I sighed, the loudest sound I dared to make around the sedately sleeping Heero. Why him? Why did all these bad things have to happen to Heero? And why now, when everything was just starting to look up? And why the hell would he leave the room when he knew what happened last time? I had seen the door, no one had forced their way into the room. Heero had left of his own free will. Why?

Questions encircled my brain, but I put them aside, knowing that finding the answers to the questions would scare Heero, just like everything else.

Heero woke up about an hour later. I was just beginning to toy with the idea of waking him up, since he needed to get some fluids, when his eyelids fluttered and he sat up.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall asleep on you," Heero apologized.

"Don't worry about it, I'm glad you got some sleep. It gave me time to admire you," I half teased. Heero gave me a weird look.

"Why would you want to do that?" he asked.

"Because your beautiful," I told him. I could tell that he didn't believe me, but I didn't want to push the subject. Not yet, anyway. His mind seemed to be a bit clearer, but I wasn't about to push my luck. "Heero, I want you to drink this. Then maybe in a bit we can go get something to eat, it's almost morning."

I reached out and took the glass from the night-stand, moving myself closer to Heero. Heero looked at the glass in my hand with horror written all over his face.

"Duo, I can't drink that," he told me, surprise and disgust in his eyes.

"Why not?"

"I-it's slime! I wont drink it! I won't!" he told me, his voice rising as he backed into the headboard.

"Heero..." What was I supposed to say? How could I tell him that everything he saw, smelled, tasted, or felt was wrong? How could I convince him that this was all an illusion, a petty trick? I had to get him to drink for his health, but what about his mind?

"Heero, you have to drink it. It... It's like medicine. It looks gross and nasty, but it's good for you."

"I won't Duo, no! That's stuff's vile! It's probably toxic!"

"It is not! Heero, you don't have a choice. You have to do this, please, for me."

"Duo... no. I-I can't. I won't. You can't make me!"

"Heero, if you don't drink it I'll... I'll leave!"

We were both silent for a moment, Heero's horror stricken eyes locked onto mine. The color drained from his face and he began to shake. God, what kind of a monster was I?

"Ok," he said quietly, "Ok, I'll do it. Just-just don't leave me alone."

Slowly, Heero took the glass from my hands. He stared at it like it was going to crawl up and bite him for a moment, then shut his eyes, took a deep breath, and chugged the whole thing. I knew it wasn't a good idea for him to drink so fast, but if it looked and tasted like slime to him I knew that he probably wouldn't be able to drink it any slower. Some of it dribbled out the sides of his mouth. Heero finally finished, dropping the glass on the bed. I grabbed him as he hunched over, visibly fighting not to get sick. I held him as he tried to keep from retching, putting the cup aside and laying him down when I was certain he wouldn't throw up.

He was crying again, like he was trying to make up for all the tears he hadn't shed before. I wiped the excess water that had dribbled from the glass off his face along with his tears. I held him and rocked him and finally got him to go back to sleep.

It was barely morning.

It wasn't even an hour after Heero had gone to sleep before I noticed that his temperature was up and his breathing sounded a bit funny. I cursed under my breath and decided to wake Heero then go get Sally.

"Heero, wake up babe," I called gently. Sleepy blue eyes opened and looked up at me. "Hey babe, how ya feelin?"

"I'm fine," he told me in a raspy voice that told me he was not fine. His voice was hoarse from all that screaming yesterday, he had bags under his eyes even though he had slept most of the night, and he had a fever.

"Heero, I'm going to go get Sally, okay? Stay right here," I told him and moved to get off the bed. I was pretty sure he wouldn't let me just walk off, so I wasn't surprised when he grabbed my hand. I turned back and smiled at him.

"Don't worry, I'm just going to the door, you'll be able to see me the whole time."

I know the kind of trust it took for Heero to let go of me. Although I wished that he would trust me not to run off at all, his trust still touched me in the way only Heero could.

I walked to the door and opened it, Heero fidgeting on the bed behind me. As I hoped, there was a servant in the hall watching the door. I barely had to get the words, "Go get Sally," out of my mouth and he was already down the hall.

It was only a second before Sally was there and I had to wonder why everyone was on such high alert. What, did they think Heero would wig out and try and kill me or something? Unfortunately, the more I thought about the surer I became that they had thought exactly that.

"Duo? Is something wrong?" Sally asked quietly, out of earshot of Heero.

"No, but Heero's got a fever and he's hoarse. Is there anything you can do about that?" I asked just as quietly. Most likely, Heero thought Sally was some kind of three headed monster and was trying to get me to kill him, I didn't want to try and add to that fear.

"Of course, silly," Sally told me smiling as she pulled a red bottle of cough syrup and a spoon out of her satchel.

"Man, you just come prepared for everything, don't you?"I teased.

"Of course. I am a doctor, after all."

And then all the teasing was over. We both knew what a hassle it was going to be to get Heero to take the medicine.

I went over to the bed first, pulling Heero into my lap so he couldn't bolt. Heero latched onto me like he always did. Sally came over and stood by the bed, then poured the medicine into a spoon.

"Heero, I need you to take some more medicine," I told him softly. It probably seemed like I was trying to torture poor Heero, but I couldn't help it. I could tell Heero was more distressed by this situation than the last one.

"Duo I can't! I won't do it! I-it's blood! I can't drink blood! Please don't make me!" he cried, burying his head in my shirt. Of course the medicine had to be red, they couldn't make it blue or purple or anything.

I knew this time that Heero wouldn't willingly take it no matter what I said, so I signaled Sally and wrapped my legs around Heero. As quickly and gently as I could, I grabbed Heero's face and turned him around. Heero gave a gasp and Sally wasted no time forcing the medicine into Heero's mouth. He choked and sputtered, but most of the medicine went down. I released him as soon as Sally had given him the medicine, allowing him to turn around and bury into my chest as hard sobs wracked his small body. Sally, put the spoon and medicine on the night-stand, then refilled the glass and left it there too.

"Duo, in two hours I'll have to come take blood from Heero to make sure there aren't any side-effects of the drug," she told me softly. Heero shuddered as she spoke, but seemed to calm a bit after she left.

I think I started talking to Heero about making plans to reassure myself more than him. I'm not afraid to admit it. I was _scared_. I was so afraid that I would lose Heero, that this terrified child would never give way to the strong, independent person Heero had been. I knew that what Heero was showing now was a part of him, a part that had never been properly nurtured, and I was glad I was able to see it. To reassure the child Heero had never been. To watch Heero show fear and all the other emotions that he normally couldn't. But I didn't want Heero trapped in that dark, demonic world of horror forever. I wanted to be able to show him the good things in life. On some level, I was afraid I'd never get the chance.

"Heero?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you remember that waterfall I told you about earlier?"

"Yes."

"Once this is all over I'm going to take you to see it. We'll spend the whole day just looking at the waterfall and swimming at the bottom of it."

"...Promise?"

"I promise."

Slowly, tired by the recent events and the drugs, Heero slipped back to sleep, cradled in my arms.


	14. Duo13

Duo POV

Heero was still sleeping when Sally came back to take blood two hours later. I wasn't surprised, I had expected Heero would sleep the whole time because of the fever and drugs, but I was a little unhappy. I didn't want Heero to keep waking up to Sally's presence, he might start to think she would only come when something bad was about to happen. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Quatre and Zechs standing in the doorway, I suspected that was not a good sign.

"Duo," Sally called, careful not to wake Heero, "We're going to have to take more blood this time. Just thought I'd warn you, after how he reacted last time. Maybe... maybe we should take it while he's asleep."

"No," I told her, shaking my head sadly, "He'd wake up and be out of his mind with fright. I don't think it's a good idea to surprise him like that."

Gently, I shook Heero awake. He opened his eyes and looked at me, then turned to see Sally. He winced and looked back at me with fear in his eyes.

"Heero," I told him softly, "Sally's got to take another blood sample. It'll only take a second and then you can go back to sleep."

I pulled Heero into a sitting position on my lap without giving him time to protest. Sally pulled out on of those evil-looking glass syringes and all the color drained from Heero's face. Damn, why did she need that much blood? She only needed a drop last time.

"Duo," Heero whispered, his voice terrified, "It's a snake. It's a snake Duo, don't let it bite me! Don't let it hurt me! Please, I'm sorry! Duo..." his eyes met mine and I suppose he could tell that I wasn't going to save him from Sally, because he went quiet and still. Sally rubbed his arm with alcohol and went to prick him with the needle.

Heero lashed out with his foot, kicking Sally and hurling the syringe across the room to shatter on the wall. He pushed against me, sending me flying to the floor, then dashed across the room. Quatre and Zechs were on him in a flurry of movement, pinning him to the floor and holding down his arms and legs so he couldn't thrash about. I got to my feet, uncertain about what I should do. In the few seconds while Sally rushed to get another syringe out of her bag, Heero's eyes met mine. They were laden with questions. "Why won't you help me? What did I do wrong? Why are you doing this to me? Do you hate me?" I could feel hot tears streak down my face, but there was no way I could answer those questions.

The moment was broken when Sally found the syringe and grabbed hold of Heero's arm. He looked at the floor, tears still sliding down his face. As gently as she could, Sally slipped the needle under Heero's skin. Heero screamed. He screamed and thrashed his head side to side and tried with all his might to pull away, but Quatre and Zechs were too strong and he only managed to tire himself out.

When Sally had finally finished, Quatre and Zechs let Heero go and stepped back quickly. Heero didn't move, only curled up into a little sobbing ball on the floor. I didn't know what to do. What reason did Heero have to trust me?

I knelt in front of Heero, daring only to put my hand on his head and stroke his hair. It hurt so bad when he flinched away from my touch, but I couldn't blame him. Even if we were trying to help, that wasn't what Heero saw.

"Heero, let me tell you a story," I said the notion popping into my head.

"A-a story?" Heero asked, his head coming up just enough so that he could see me from underneath his bangs.

"Uh-huh. A story. This story starts out with a man named Duo. This man went in search of the perfect mate, because only he and his one true love could defeat the monster that had been destroying Duo's village," I could tell that Heero was getting interested, the story taking his mind off of everything else. He even uncurled from his ball and rested his head on my knees. Slowly, I started spinning a story out of spider webs and pixy dust, "He was looking for traits like kindness, gentleness, caring, understanding, bravery, honesty..."

"... And so together they defeated the evil monster and Heero and Duo went back to the castle and lived happily ever after," I finished. It didn't matter though, Heero had fallen asleep some time ago.

"Someday," I told his sleeping form, "I'll make you see just how wonderful you are. Then I'll tell you I love you."

Careful not to wake him, I curled up to the sleeping Heero and fell asleep beside him on the floor.

I awoke later to the sound of raindrops on the roof and an incredibly sore back. I sat up and stretched, careful not to jar Heero. Gently, I picked Heero up and laid him on the bed, then went to relieve myself. I went quickly, hoping Heero wouldn't wake without me. When I came back out, I was surprised to see Quatre sitting in a chair on the other side of the room.

"Hey," I called softly, walking up to him.

"Hey," he said, also keeping his voice quiet for Heero, "I thought you could use someone to talk to. You've been pretty upset lately."

"I can't believe it's only been a few hours. It feels like it's been forever."

"Only five hours left to go. Hang in there, Heero needs you."

"Quatre... I've got to get him away from here. Every time I leave him alone something bad happens."

"Zechs says we can have the eggs all cleaned up in a week if we hurry. You know as well as I do that this is top priority. If this isn't handled well there could be war."

"There's already going to be war, Quatre, we're just not sure who with. Somebody's trying to start something, we just don't know who."

"I realize, Duo, but would you prefer to have China with us or against us in that war?"

"I know, I know. I just hate it here. I wanna get Heero somewhere safe, you can understand that."

"Of course I can, but we're all here now. You know we'll watch out for Heero when you can't. Nothing like this is going to happen again. You know that," Quatre finished, then took his leave.

"Quatre," I called as he headed out the door, "Thanks."

I got a nod and a small wave in reply, like it was nothing. Feeling, if not better, a little lighter, I walked over to the bed and crawled in beside Heero.

"Duo?"

"Sorry Heero, did I wake you?"

"No, I heard the door shut and thought you left."

"You know I wouldn't do that."

"I know but... I'm sorry."

"It's alright. I just wish you'd trust me."

"I do trust you."

"But not enough to know I wouldn't leave?"

"...Why would anyone want to stay with someone like me? It doesn't make sense."

"It makes perfect sense. You're a wonderful person."

"Then why do these monsters always follow me around? I must have done something horrible. You don't know me very well, Duo, I'm a bad person. I do bad things. I kill."

"I know you kill, but you do it because you have to. Do you like to kill? Do you like hurting others?"

"No!"

"Then you're not a bad person."

"How can you say that? You don't know what I've done."

"Heero, times are hard right now. The wars in Europe and France have just finished. India has just gotten its new government settled, and Russia is just trying to get used to our new ruler, Treize. There's fighting everywhere and in most places it's a kill or be killed society. I know you fell guilty about what you've done, and that will never fade, but the people that love you want you to be happy. Even if they're gone, they still want to see you happy."

Heero frowned, looking sullen in the drawn out silence. His next words surprised me.

"No one loves me."

I laughed out loud, surprising Heero so much that he jumped, then turned on his most heated scowl.

"No one has ever loved you? Never?" I asked, knowing that couldn't possibly be true. Heero looked uncertain for a moment.

"One person, when I was little. Maybe."

"Maybe? There is no maybe in love. You either do or you don't."

"I think he did. He took care of me even though he didn't have to. He cared for me when I was sick. He trained me to fight, but he didn't force me to."

"See? He did love you. He would want you to be happy."

"...He didn't love me."

"Why not?"

"He left me. You don't leave the people you love."

"What happened?"

"He died. It was an accident. His name was Odin Lowe. He came to Japan when China tried to invade. He was European, sent by their king to defend the European ports so they could still trade. He was caught in a burning building when the roof collapsed."

"How did the two of you meet?"

"He found me tied up in an abandoned building and cut me loose. He took me home with him, fed me, gave me a warm place to sleep, and taught me everything he knew. But he didn't love me. You don't leave the ones you love."

"Heero, what makes you think he's gone?"

"What?"

"If there's anything humans have taught me, it's that just because you can't see someone, it doesn't mean they're not here. The dead watch over you."

Heero raised his eyes from where they were staring at the comforter and looked around the room. I could tell he was seeing something I couldn't.

"I don't like the dead," he told me in a small, hushed voice, "I don't want them to watch me anymore."

"Tell me what you see," I asked him, needing to know what those haunted blue eyes of his saw. He shuddered, looking at me with pleading eyes, but did as I asked.

"The walls are covered in blood. It pools on the floor and makes a puddle about an inch deep. Bodies, some just skeletons some still decomposing, lie on the floor. When I look at them, they look back at me, some with dead eyes, others with black pits. They move whenever they feel like it, using their bony fingers to clutch at the drapes or the walls, sometimes even the bed, and try to rise, but they never manage to get to their feet. The rats come and eat at them sometimes and they scream, trying to bat them away. Once in a while a little girl will come, half of her face is perfect, with blue eyes and blonde hair and a pink dress, the other half is all skeleton. She always has her puppy on a leash with her, but it never has any skin, just two pleading brown eyes. Sometimes I close my eyes, but that just makes it worse because I can hear what she's doing but I can't see it. Sometimes she'll come so close I can taste it, so close I could touch her. I hate the sounds she makes. She walks around with her puppy crying but she never stops or tells me what she wants. I stopped asking a long time ago. She usually leaves when the crows come, or the snakes. They feast on the bodies too. I can't stand watching them eat the bodies. It smells so bad I just want to gag, but I can't because I'll make noise. Sometimes, if I move too much, the crows or the snakes will come feed on me. Sometimes the bodies come and..."

"Stop! Stop, Heero, enough! D-don't say anymore!"

God, how could he live in a world like that? What kind of person would want to put Heero through that? Repeatedly, too, it seemed, since Heero was fairly accustomed to what went on inside the nightmares. I knew I was shaking, but I couldn't stop. Heero was giving me a funny look.

"Don't worry Duo, they won't come near us. They know you'll protect me, so they've stayed away," he told me, his bright eyes shining with happiness. I let out a strangled sound. I wanted to protect him, but I couldn't.

"Why? Why, Heero? Why did you leave the room when I was away? I told you not to, but you did. Why?" I asked, my voice cracking with emotion. Heero became upset, his eyes brimming with tears again.

"I-I'm sorry. I was so sad when you left and Master J..."

"Is he the one that did this to you?" I asked, my anger surging. That bastard!

"Y-yes. H-he took me to his lab and gave me the shot he uses to help me get rid of my emotions."

"Do you know where this lab is? Could you tell me?"

"It's in the dungeon. The entrance is secret, you can only get to it by pulling on the torch holder in the cell. You're not mad at me, are you?"

"Of course not, silly. Now, go to sleep. The next time I wake you everything will be back to normal. All the monsters will be gone," I told him as hope began to fill his eyes. Gently, I laid a hand on his forehead, "Besides, you still have a fever. You need some sleep."

"Did you mean it? Will the monsters go away?" he asked me, the child in him peaking through.

"Of course. Now go to sleep," I told him and he immediately curled on his side and closed his eyes. I smiled sadly. Soon, Heero would be better. Soon. Putting my arms around his small body, I was soon fast asleep with him, plotting plans of revenge in my dreams.

I awoke to feeling of someone standing above me. Instantly I came awake and looked up, only to find Heero hovering above me, his eyes wide with fever and awe.

"You made the monsters go away," he told me, his tone revealing astonishment and reverence. And suddenly his arms gave out and he was sobbing on top of me, kissing up and down my neck and face.

"Please, I love you! Please, don't leave me! Please! I love you! Don't leave me!" he cried hysterically. I knew he didn't really love me, I had traced the link to his mind many times lately, calming him and sorting things out, barely realizing I was doing it. I knew Heero had grown to love the concept of safety that I offered him, but he still wasn't ready to love me. It was alright, I could wait.

However, this notion that I would leave him still, even after it appeared that the drugs had left his system, bothered me. I wrapped my arms around him, immobilizing him. He sniffed from crying, what I was assuming an after-effect of the drug, and looked up at me with sad eyes.

"Alright babe, what makes you think I'm going to leave you?"

"I know you hate it here. I was hoping I could make you happy enough that you'd want to stay, but I've been nothing but trouble and I haven't made you happy. I know you plan to go back to your home with your friends, but I want you to stay with me. I'm so selfish, I'm sorry."

"Heero, I'm the one who should be sorry. I thought you knew. I would never leave you, I've told you that. When I go back to my home, your coming with me. I'm sorry if I led you to believe otherwise."

His eyes had gone awe-struck again, and I was starting to wonder how bad his fever really was. He didn't feel too hot, but still...

"Do you really mean that?" Heero asked me, his voice small again.

"Of course I do. You have to trust me. Now, I want you to drink that glass of water on the night-stand and go back to sleep. The drugs aren't completely out of your system yet."

Heero nodded and drank the glass of water, making a small face since the water was warm. Then he laid back down, but couldn't seem to get to sleep.

"Duo?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you think we could go lay by the window? I'm a little hot..."

"Is your fever up again?" I asked, quickly checking his forehead and comparing it to mine. I was glad to find that it wasn't too bad, though a little higher than normal. I looked over to find Heero smirking at me.

"What?" I asked.

"You."

"What about me."

"You just panicked because I said I was hot."

"I did not!"

"Hn."

"Come on, you said you were hot so let's go lay in front of the window already," I told him, trying to distract him even though I couldn't get him to lose that shit-eating smirk of his.

I took the blanket and we curled up in front of the open window, the rain had stopped and a cool breeze blew in. The sky was still cloudy and dark, but it was beautiful and seemed to fit the mood perfectly. The rain-fairies, a special kind of fairy that was said to sing a song after every storm, were even out. Everyone knew that the fairies made the noise beating their wings to get rid of the moisture, but it didn't make the sound any less magical. I only wished Heero could hear it, it was far too high pitched for the human ear to hear. However, Heero did seem to be listening to something, probably the crickets outside.

Inside my head, I was making plans for revenge. Once Heero was asleep I planned to have Sally come sit with him while I went down to the dungeon to find Lord J. There was no way I would let a ruler like that live, not after what he had done to Heero, but I didn't know if Heero was still loyal to him and letting him know my plans would only cause him unnecessary worry.

Just as Heero's breathing started to even out as he slipped into sleep, the song of the rain-fairies waned and stopped. Heero frowned and sleepily mumbled, "What a pretty song."

I stared at him so long that he was fast asleep by the time I realized just what had happened.

Oh yes, J had a lot of questions to answer.

When I was sure Heero was asleep deep enough that he wouldn't wake if I left, I called Quatre and asked him to stay with Heero. I think he saw that he couldn't dissuade me from what I was about to do, because he simply grabbed a book and sat down.

It wasn't hard to find the lab, rather it was surprisingly easy. Heero's directions led me to a small room behind a moving wall. The room had a large table with tubs, glass jars, and wires going all over the place, some bubbling over burners. It was your typical evil genius laboratory. How boring.

At a clean portion of the table writing with a long feather pen on some high quality paper was Lord J. He didn't even look up as I walked in, simply continued his mad scribbling. I was half wondering if the old guy had gone bonkers when he threw down his pencil and turned around, not a hint of fear on his face. I was a bit put out.

"I suppose you're here to kill me for what I've done to your pet, correct Shinigami?" he sneered.

"Heero is not my pet!"

"Whatever he is. It really doesn't matter to me."

"Doesn't it bother you that you're about to die?" I couldn't help but ask him. It had been a long time since I'd seen someone who didn't care whether they lived or died, other than Heero, but he had started to care so he didn't count. The old man's eyes went far away and I could tell he wasn't just seeing this dark, dirty room. I briefly wondered what horrors his past held, then decided I didn't care. There was no excuse for the pain he put Heero though, I could never forgive him for that.

"I've been dead for a long time," he told me softly, then seemed to shake himself, "Well, don't keep me waiting, demon, if you're going to kill me, kill me already. I'll die of old age soon, then you won't have the pleasure of my death."

"Before you die, you've got some questions to answer, and you had better answer, or your last few moments of life will be... unpleasant."

"Ha! Unpleasant, is that the best you can come up with? My whole life has been _unpleasant_!"

"Look gramps, I'm not here for your sob story! I'm here to ask a couple questions, kill you, and get out, got it?"

"Seems simple enough to me, even though you have yet to ask a single question."

"Alright smart ass, what is Heero?"

"A slave."

"You scum!" I shouted grabbing him by the neck and slamming him against the wall. He flinched in pain, but showed no fear. "You know what I'm asking. Heero is not human, what is he? A shapeshifter? A wizard? What?" Damn bastard had the audacity to laugh at me.

"No, nothing like that! The boy, Heero I suppose he's called, is a demon."

"What? That's not possible. He would have had his wings by now, he's got to be at least thirteen."

"Actually, he's sixteen, only two years younger than you if that's what you worried about," he told me, smirking knowingly. I blushed, though the relational aspects of him being so young were not what I had been thinking of.

"If he's a demon why doesn't he have his wings? Why doesn't he have a tail? He looks like a damn human!"

"And he thinks he's a human as well. Which is what I wanted. I wanted him to fight for the humans, to overthrow the demon leaders. If things had gone as I had planned, we would have been able to take over the entire world in a few short years, with wingless demons controlling the dragons and Oz controlling them."

"Oz?"

"What, you thought I was doing this all alone? Don't be silly, boy."

"What changed?"

"Nothing much, I simply found that all those in Oz are cowards. They found out just how strong the wingless demon was and were afraid they wouldn't be able to control him. They ordered me to kill him, but I wasn't about to do that, not after all the trouble he and Odin put me through."

"Odin?"

"Blasted man found the demon waiting for me in one of former hideouts and kidnaped him. It took me forever to find him again. It was sheer luck that the man was killed before I left Japan and I was able to recapture my experiment."

"So why is Heero wingless?" I asked him and he gave a look to me that you give to someone extremely stupid.

"Because I gave him an enzyme to keep his wings and anything else demonic from developing," he told me slowly. Once he was done he got this look of distaste, annoyance even. "It doesn't matter now, though, Heero will never be as strong as he once was. No matter how much he recovers he will never have the stamina he once had, I'm not even sure about what else has been irreversibly damaged."

"So that's it? Heero was supposed to take over the world for you, and then what? Would you have killed him?"

"Of course. I couldn't have something that powerful waltzing around my new domain, he might have tried to overthrow me."

"You sick, demented old fool. Do you know what you've done to Heero?"

"I've made him perfect. It is you that hurt him. He had hope when you where near him. It hurt him deeply when that hope was killed. I made him stop hurting."

I took my fist and bashed the man's head in and dropped him on the floor. What could I say? It was all true. In some sick, twisted way I had given Heero hope and it had hurt him. But I knew it was better to give him hope than it was to let him walk through life as a shell of a person, feeling nothing, no joy or pain. It was better this way.

Wasn't it?


	15. Heero14

Heero POV

Duo wouldn't let me out of bed for two full days after I had recovered from the Hell drug. Even though I hadn't really been in any danger and I barely had a fever, he watched over me like I was on my last legs. At first I was grateful, he didn't hate me or think any less of me and he had stayed by me that entire time, even though I was acting so crazy. But after a little while the novelty of it faded and left me feeling like an invalid. I know I was a bit of a... trial after that.

On the third day he did take me to see the waterfall, just like he said he would, and we went swimming. It would have been the perfect outing, the waterfall was gorgeous, the weather was great, and the water was fine, but he constantly had one eye on me, making sure I was okay.

It was like he didn't trust me to take care of myself.

To top it all off, Duo had to go help the others get the dragon eggs ready to ship back to the capitol and my nightmares came back. Before I had been too sick to have nightmares, but with the drugs completely out of my system and my time spent worrying over Duo's absence brought them back with a vengeance. I was probably getting just as much sleep as before Duo had come.

The most embarrassing thing that came from the whole thing was that Duo decided I needed a babysitter to stay with me when he wasn't there. He made it seem logical when he explained it to me; we had the only room with a private bathroom and little Mei had a tendency toward getting dirty, but there was a bathroom right down the hall. Besides, even if Mei needed a bath, there was no need for them to stay in the room with me all day. It was simply the fact that Duo didn't trust me, though I couldn't blame him. I had broken his trust when I left the room.

Today Quatre was watching me, since Sally had been called away to look over the body of Lord J. I wasn't sorry he was dead, only I was a bit curious as to why the entire compound wasn't being questioned as to who could have killed him.

Quatre had just finished giving Mei a bath, she was only a few weeks old and already she had found that if you squeeze the baby powder bottle hard enough it produces a very entertaining cloud of white stuff.

"Heero, could you come here for a second?" Quatre asked from the bathroom. I closed the book I had been reading and walked into the bathroom. Quatre had Mei wrapped in a towel, I could see the cloudy white water still in the small, sink-like basin that could be attached to the side of the tub. Quatre held out Mei in my direction.

"Here, take her for a minute. I have to clean up in here," Quatre told me. I took hold of Mei under the arms, holding her away from my body and wondering what I was supposed to do with the child. Mei gave me a weird look, like she was trying to decided whether to smile at me or throw up on me. I had no idea what to do, so I took her out of the bathroom and put her on the bed, then sat beside her to keep her from rolling off.

Quatre came out a moment later with Mei's clothes and began to dress her. While he had her out of the towel, I noticed something that astonished me.

"She has no wings," I commented, having not even realized I said it out loud until Quatre looked up at me.

"Of course not. Demon's don't grow their wings until puberty. It's not a very well-known fact, though, so don't feel bad. Duo didn't even know he was a demon until his wings started to grow."

"So Duo thought he was a human?"

"Sure. Duo's lived with humans for most of his life."

"Why? What happened to Duo's parents? Where did he live?"

"Heero, I think you should ask Duo those questions. It wouldn't be right for me to tell you and, truthfully, I don't know everything about Duo myself. Just know that Duo hasn't had an easy life."

Quatre moved to set Mei down and I digested that. Perhaps Duo and I had more in common than I thought. But what kind of hard life could Duo have had? And why would he be living with humans? How could he not have known he was a demon?

"Heero," Quatre said, coming to sit beside me on the bed, "I'm glad Duo found you. Duo has a hard time getting really close to people, he tries to keep them at arm's length, but he is very close to you and I think it's good for him."

"Duo isn't close to me."

I didn't want to wipe the smile off Quatre's face, but he was putting hopes in me that didn't belong there. I wasn't good for Duo, I was bad for him. All I ever did was kill and screw up. I knew Quatre was surprised by what I had said, but it was better than having him hope I could do something I couldn't.

"Why would you say that?"

"Duo doesn't trust me anymore."

"You mean all this?" Quatre asked, "I don't know if you'll believe me or not, but this is more for Duo than for you."

It was my turn to be surprised.

"I don't understand."

"Heero, you really scared Duo when you... broke down like that. He was so afraid you were going to die and then he felt so bad when you had those hallucinations... he blames himself. He's starting to think that by staying here with you he's asking for something bad to happen. I really think he would have taken you away from here if I hadn't convinced him to stay. He knows he has to complete his job here, but he's so afraid you'll get hurt again. I think he's starting to think this place is some sort of jinx. I just... I want you to understand that it's not you he doesn't trust, he's just scared of losing you right now," Quatre looked at me deeply, like he was trying to convey how much this mattered, "I know this is all annoying, but please understand, Duo was really scared that you would die. Most of the people that cared about him in his life had died, he was afraid the same thing will happen to you. Please, just be patient, you may not realize it, but Duo does need you. He would be sad if you left him."

I almost snorted. Like I had anywhere else to go. I must have shown a hint of what I was feeling on my face because Quatre frowned, leaned forward, and said, "It is your choice. No one can make you be friends with them, or anything else. If you want to leave, Duo will be hurt, but he'll understand. In time," he added affectionately, then a smile broke out on his face, "and probably three to five apple or cherry pies later he'll feel better. Duo has a tendency to eat when he's upset. I wish I had a metabolism like that," Quatre said and I could see him heading for normal conversation material which I was not interested in. Quatre had given me a lot to think about.

Duo came back that night exhausted and covered in sweat. Instead of heading straight for the shower, since he preferred the shower down the hall to bathing in our room, he came up and stuck his head in the room where I was reading and Quatre was playing with Mei.

"Hey guys and small girl child, how's it going?" he said, smiling, then went over and twirled Mei around, she giggled the whole time.

"One of these days, Duo, she's going to puke all over you and I'm going to laugh," Quatre told him, half-teasing. Duo faked a look of insult.

"Mei would never do that to me! Would you?" he asked the girl, who simply squealed and giggled some more.

Duo handed Mei back to Quatre and bound over to me.

"Hey Heero!" he said, grinning from ear to ear. I could see that he had spent most of the day doing hard, physical labor. His clothes were dirty, he was sweaty, and he needed a bath.

"You smell bad," I told him, he pouted.

"Didn't you miss me?" he asked, giving me puppy-eyes. I raised and eyebrow.

"That means yes in Heero's language! I knew you'd miss me! Well, I'm off to the showers, try to contain yourself while I'm gone," he shot and was out the door in a flurry of movement.

If I had just met Duo, I would have thought he was on a caffeine high. Having known him for several weeks, I could easily tell that Duo was exhausted. It wasn't his manner that gave him away, he did the same things he would have normally done, but his movements were slow and lethargic. I could tell all he wanted to do was bathe, eat, and sleep. I asked Sara to bring something for supper up to the room while Quatre was packing up Mei.

"See?" he asked me on the way out, "I said you were good for him. I won't say I told you so, I just want to make it known that I was right," he said, grinning cheekily, then left. I snorted, sometimes he was a bit too much like Duo.

When Duo came back to the room, fresh from his shower, Sara had already set up and left. Duo smiled, teasing me about just wanting to get into his bed, but I could tell he appreciated not having to go down to the hall to eat. I was very glad we had stayed in the room to eat when Duo fell asleep in the middle of his mashed potatoes. He was only lucky he hadn't gotten his hair in it or been anywhere anyone but me could see him. He would have probably never lived it down.

Smirking to myself, I picked up his lithe form and put him into bed, taking time to remove the boots he had worn coming down the cold, stone halls from the shower. I barely managed to contain a snort when he opened his mouth and let out a half-hearted snore. Careful not to wake him, I closed his mouth, effectively stopping the snores, and ran my hands through his hair.

"Mmm... Love you..." he muttered in his sleep, frowning a bit then turning over. I pulled back my hand with a startled gasp.

He couldn't mean _me_!

I shook my head, then lay down next to Duo and fell asleep wondering who he could be in love with. I had bad dreams all night long.


	16. Duo15

Duo POV

I had hoped that after Heero got better things would start looking up too. Stupid little optimistic me. It wasn't too bad for the first day after Heero had the drugs out of his system, he was exhausted from the physical and emotional stress. However, after that he just wanted to forget it ever happened, kept saying that he had never been in any real danger and that he was used to it.

I think Heero might have been just fine ignoring what happened, but, dammit, I wasn't. I had almost lost him. I don't care that he wasn't in any real danger, to me it felt like he was right on the verge of dying and there was nothing I could do about it. I wasn't ready to just pretend it hadn't happened, I wanted a couple days to just lie in bed and recover for him... and for me.

Heero had other plans. He was back to trying to clean the room twenty times a day. He was going around and doing odd jobs behind my back, I must have dragged him back to the room twenty times the second day he was better.

The day after that I took him to the waterfall just like I said I would. I didn't want Heero to feel rejected or disappointed and I had promised. It was just as beautiful as I remembered, but I didn't look at it a whole lot. I spent most of my time watching Heero, worrying that the cold air and the water combined with his sickness and lowered immune system would make him sick.

By the third day I think Heero was about ready to deck me. If there's anything I've learned about Heero it's that he hates to rest, it makes him feel useless, unneeded, and... unwanted. I didn't want him to feel like that, of course, but I was so worried about him physically I didn't think about the mental aspects enough. I knew I was worrying obsessively, but I didn't know how to stop. It all came down to one thing; I was scared. I wanted to get the hell out of the place that had caused Heero so much pain, but I couldn't because of my duty.

So I got my friends to babysit Heero while I was gone. Even when I was ignoring our link I could feel how much he resented that. I didn't want him to feel useless or pathetic, but I'd be damned if I was going to let him alone in that place again. I'd sooner take him out to the dragon's cave with me.

On a better note, the dragon was behaving herself wonderfully. She usually just laid in the cave except for when she went hunting, you could pet her or anything, just like a big dog. The eggs all had to be chipped apart, but it was going fairly fast. Dragon eggs aren't as big as you'd think, they're only about as big as a bowling ball. Some of the time we could just chip away a bunch of them save some time, but some of them were spread out. The real job wasn't chipping them apart, we didn't even have to do that unless there were more than thirty eggs in a group. The real job was chipping them off the rocks and other things in the cave.

I think I was a little slower than usual with the eggs. I was tired all the time. Heero's nightmares had come back with a vengeance and I spent most of the night dealing with them, we were both getting about three to four hours of real sleep, the rest was spent with him fighting nightmares and me trying to help him. It... did not help my worry to have to listen him whimper all night long.

It was the sixth day of Heero's recovery, two days after I started working with the eggs, that the former Lord J's body was found. There wasn't too much fuss, everyone in the castle had suspected I had killed the good doctor, even Zechs and Sally didn't make too much of a fuss when I told them I had killed the Lord, having told them what he did to Heero.

It was probably a week after that, I really don't remember since the days seemed to just flow into one another. I would leave every morning and go dig the eggs out of the cave and come home dead tired at the end of the day only to have to stay up most of the night and calm Heero's nightmares. I think perhaps that lack of sleep was the main thing that stopped my ability to track time. Whatever the day, we had finally finished digging out all the eggs and had them ready for transport. We'd be leaving for the capitol of Russia, Haven, in two days and meet the eggs when they arrived there. Some of Trieze's most trusted officers, below all of us, had come in with these huge, specially bred horses to haul the eggs back to Haven.

We'd finally get to go home! I'd be able to take Heero and show him all the things I'd wanted, be able to get our link deepened, which required a special process but could allow us to trade more feelings and even some thoughts. I'd be able to keep Heero safe.

And yet I wasn't as happy as I should have been. I worried about taking Heero away from the only place he'd ever known and into a place he knew nothing about. Oh, I planned to tell him a bit about Haven before we left, but his lack of questions about it surprised and worried me. He didn't care where we were going? He didn't want to know? Or was he again doubting my sincerity and thinking I might leave him behind?

All these questions and more fed on me as I came back form the cave that last day. It probably didn't help that I was dead tired, nearly falling asleep in the air. It was late and I hadn't eaten breakfast, having overslept due to Heero's nightmares. I knew I reeked, but I had to see Heero before anything else. So I went up and said hello to him, Quatre, and Mei, then went to get my shower. I could tell that Quatre had been mad at me for something, but I really didn't have the energy to ask what. I needed sleep desperately. I almost cried when I saw Heero had asked dinner be brought up to the room and started to chow down immediately.

The next thing I knew I was shushing Heero as he whimpered in the throes of another nightmare.

"What the hell?" I wondered sitting up. I belatedly realized I was in bed with Heero and I must have fallen asleep at the table. I was really glad I hadn't went down to the hall for dinner, that would have been mortifying.

Another whimper brought me back to Heero and I pulled him into my arms, soothing him until the nightmare was gone, sending him good feelings over our link without even realizing it. Sending feelings of safety.

Once Heero was fully out of the dream and sleeping normally, I got up. It was too early to really go to sleep, but too late to do something fun, so I decided to head down to the library to pick up a new book, which seemed to becoming a late-night hobby of everyone in Wing. When I got to the library, Quatre was already curled up in an armchair in front of the fire. He looked up before I could back out of the room.

"Hello Duo," he said in that 'I want to talk' tone. Man, I must have done something really bad to my chi to be this unlucky.

"What's up, Quat?" I asked, plopping down in one of the plush sofas.

"I'm a bit worried about you and Heero."

I am proud to say that I refrained from groaning.

"Oh?"

"Duo, you can't say that you haven't been acting odd lately. You've been watching Heero like a hawk and having us babysit him is not helping his confidence at all. Look at you, you're not sleeping, you look like crap, and you're fixated on Heero.. I know you're still worried from when Heero was sick, but I know that's not all."

"Quatre, thanks for pointing all this out, but I already know we're having some problems. I'll clear them up when we head back home, alright?" I asked, a bit annoyed. I knew we were having problems and I didn't need him pointing them out to me. I'd fix all of them, I just needed a bit of time.

"I'm sorry," Quatre said with a sigh, looking sincere, "I didn't mean to sound like I was lecturing you. It's just that I've been so worried about you and Heero lately, but I can't talk to him because I keep feeling strong bursts of emotion from him at night and it's messing with how I see him. I want to run up and hug him or deck you, but I know that neither would be a welcome gesture and I don't know enough about what's going on to really help. It's driving me crazy."

Quatre has a sort of... link with the world. His dad called it a Space Heart, whatever the heck that means. Anyway, he can feel strong bursts of emotion from anyone, he doesn't have to be linked to them. It's helpful in the negotiation, since he can feel when someone is really scared, but useless in normal relationships because he can't feel the weaker emotions. Also, he can't make his Space Heart links any stronger without using a regular linking spell. Belatedly, I realized that Quatre must have been picking up on Heero's emotions during him dreams. Although Quatre would have only been awakened at the peak of the nightmares, two or three time a night, it could not have been pleasant.

"I'm not here to judge you or yell at you, Duo, I'm here as a friend," Quatre continued, "I just thought... you could use someone to talk to, that's all."

"Thanks Quat, but I should really get back to Heero..." I said rising off the sofa.

"Duo, if Heero starts another nightmare I'll tell you, alright? Sit down and talk to me. We don't have to talk about Heero, I just thought it would help."

I blink owlishly at him.

"You knew they were nightmares?" He laughed at me, I mean, really laughed at me. I full-throated, throw your head back sort of laugh. I was a bit surprised.

"Duo, if I hadn't known it was a nightmare I would have rushed down to your room and broken down the door. People's feelings are just a bit different in their dreams, because their subconscious is feeding them the feelings. I could tell the difference, but I still wasn't happy about it."

I sat back down, figuring I might as well not fight it.

"I guess you already know why I haven't been getting a lot of sleep lately then."

"Mm-hmm."

"Heero usually wakes me with those nightmares of his four or five times a night, so I haven't been sleeping very well."

"Any idea what could be causing these nightmares?"

"Not a clue. I've tried just about everything I could think of to keep them at bay, I even had Sally make a sleeping potion and I snuck it in Heero's drink. It didn't help at all and I felt really bad about it. I don't know what to do."

"Have you tried using your link to help him?"

"How did you find out about that?"

"Oh please, even if Zechs hadn't started ranting about how reckless you are the minute I got here it still would have been easy to see."

"Oh. Yeah, then, I have been using the link to get Heero out of the nightmares, but there's nothing I can do to stop them."

"Have you thought about strengthening your link? It would bring the two of you closer and you might be able to help Heero with his nightmares."

"I've thought about it, but it would be a little hard."

"Why?"

"I haven't... um... I haven't really told Heero about the link yet. He doesn't know."

"You what!"

"Quatre, I know Zechs told you how I linked with Heero in the middle of the forest. Heero doesn't even know what the link is, let alone that it's there. And I just haven't enlightened him yet."

"You're scared."

"I am not."

"Yes you are, I can see it in your eyes. You're terrified Heero will learn about the link and push you away. That he'll feel betrayed because you didn't tell him and he'll be mad at you for linking without his permission."

"So? So what if I don't want to tell him, it's not like it'll hurt him not to know. And, I mean, what's wrong with the way things are right now!"

"Nothing, but Duo, you two could have so much more. If you can't trust Heero there's no use trying to get closer to him. You don't want to tell him about the link because you afraid he'll be mad enough to use it to hurt you. You don't trust him."

"I do trust Heero!"

"Prove it. Take your link with Heero to the next level."

"I will! Just... just as soon as we get out of here."

"Duo, did you know Zechs and Noin aren't coming back with us?"

"What? Why not?

"We sent a message ahead to Trieze, telling him what's been going on. There are no lords in line for this hold, so Trieze put Zechs in charge."

"Oh. So what does this have to do with Heero and me?"

"Zechs is the only one good enough with his psychic powers to put Heero into the medative state needed to raise your link. You've practiced hypnotizing others and yourself all your life, but it would take months for Heero to learn those skills, if he ever could. You need to raise your bond with Heero _before_ we leave."

I sat and digested that for a minute. The last thing I wanted to do was have Heero put into that kind of trance here, where I didn't think he was safe, but Quatre was right. If I didn't raise the level of our bond now, we might never get another chance. I had to tell Heero the truth and hope he still trusted me. It was the only way to get his nightmares stopped.

"Duo," Quatre called softly from across the room, "Nightmare."

I sighed, then bolted out the door and down the hall to my room, threw open the door, and dashed across the room and to the bed, where Heero was just beginning the first stages of a nightmare.

I sighed with relief, I had thought Heero had been in the hold of a nightmare, not in the beginning. Slowly, as not to wake or startle him, I climbed into bed and curled up beside him. Gently, I pulled him into my arms. He immediately turned around and buried his head in my chest, holding my shirt in his fist. I opened our link and started to soothe his troubled mind, hoping I could ease him out of the nightmare. Carefully, trying not to trigger a nightmare about Dekim and Barton, I slipped my hand under his shirt and rubbed his back. Heero calmed even more and I could tell that I would be able to pull him out of the dream.

Heero has always reacted better to skin-to-skin touch than anything else with me, I'm not sure if it's because he hasn't been touched or held a whole lot in his life, or he just likes the warmth of my skin. Heck, I'm not even sure it's me, he may just be a person that reacts very well to physical touch but is too shy to initiate it. Whatever the matter, I learned early on that Heero pulled away from his dreams easier if I touched him. At first it was just holding hands, but as the dreams got worse I started cuddling him more, tangling our legs together, rubbing his back, pressing our foreheads together, just normal touches.

Of course, it was a constant battle to keep those touches from crossing the line from friendly into more-than-friendly. It didn't help that Heero had no restraint when asleep and he would constantly wiggle until he was laying on top of me or in other provocative positions. Also, he seemed to like to touch back. I didn't mind at all when he grabbed my shirt or wrapped his arms around my neck, but when his sleeping hands went other places... then we had problems. There were a couple times I nearly ravaged the sleeping boy, only knowing how much he trusted me and the fact that he had no idea how much he was torturing me kept me form trying anything.

I didn't want to hurt him or spoil what we had, even if it was only friendship, so I kept quiet about my growing attraction to the blue eyed boy. Unfortunately for me, the _only_ person who couldn't see my attraction was Heero, everyone else was trying to give me tips on my romantic life. I gave them a few tips on where to shove it.

I decided that night that I had to tell Heero about our link, and firmly resolved to talk to him in the morning. There was no way in hell I'd wake him up from the comfortable sleep I had just struggled to put him in, but I knew I had to tell him before I lost my nerve and, possibly, lost him forever.


	17. Heero16

Heero POV

I woke up with Duo wrapped around me the next morning. It was odd, normally Duo was up before me, though he'd never tell me how long he had been up. Sometimes I worried that I had woke him while making motions or sounds in my dreams, but he never complained about my nightmares, only commented on how tired I looked and suggested ways to get rid of them.

I sat up slowly, trying not to disturb Duo, and looked at his sleeping face. There were deep bags under Duo's eyes and I knew he wasn't getting enough sleep either. It worried me, but I had no idea what caused it so there was no way to try and help. Duo should have been getting at least six hours of sleep, even if he was up before me, so I just couldn't understand it.

I reached out and stroked Duo's hair, he always wore it loose to bed, and watched the multicolored strands twist around my fingers. I'd always been enthraled by Duo's hair, the way it shone and bounced when he walked. It was beautiful.

How could someone so beautiful care for someone so plain as I? I was lucky Duo even stood my presence, let alone took care of me the way he did. Yet my heart hurt every time I thought of the lover that must be waiting for Duo at his home.

Duo's eyelashes began to flutter and I could see that he waking. His eyes opened and revealed tired violet eyes. He looked up at me and smiled.

"Hey," he called softly.

"Good morning," I replied and couldn't help but run my hands through his hair one more time. Duo sat up and flung the blankets off, always one to start the morning quickly.

"How about we get breakfast in here today?" he asked as he disappeared into the bathroom. I grunted in acknowledgment. Duo always showered first, giving me a few minutes to straighten out the bed. I knew he'd call for Sara as soon as I got into the shower.

I liked the shower well enough once I got used to taking them, but I just never felt as clean as when I bathed in the river. I just couldn't imagine how you could get clean scrubbing with water that had been sitting in rusty pipes for weeks, it just didn't seem sanitary, which was probably stupid since the river bottom was covered in mud. I never voiced these protests to Duo, since I knew he'd try and fix them or worry about it too much, but they were there all the same. I sometimes wondered what my new home, Haven, Duo had once called it, would be like. Would it have forests and rivers like Wing had? Or would it be barren? I hadn't asked Duo, because I wasn't sure if I could go through with the move if he told me it was a wasteland.

When I came out from my shower, fully clothed but a little damp, breakfast was already laid out and Duo was sitting at the table.

He looked... edgy. A little anxious. Nervous even. Not a common emotion for Duo.

"Duo, what's wrong?" I asked. He gave me a forced half-smile.

"Heero... come sit down. We need to talk."

All the possibilities of what I could possibly have done wrong ran through my head. I hadn't made Duo mad lately, and I thought he was over the Hell drug incident. What was he going to tell me? That he had finally realized I was as evil as I had told him and he was leaving me? Maybe he never wanted to see me again! Maybe...

"Heero!"

I jumped and fell out of my seat onto the floor. I looked around, a bit confused, then realized I must have sat down at the table when Duo told me to, even though my mind was elsewhere. Duo was standing above me, a sad little smirk an his face.

"You back now?" he asked as he leaned down beside me.

"Yes," I responded.

"Look Heero, I'm sorry if I was acting funny earlier, but you have to stop panicking about everything I say," he told me, leaning closer and putting his hands on my shoulders, "I won't abandon you, I promised, remember? Trust me."

Things were getting... odd. Duo's face was only inches from my own and his eyes seemed to sparkle more than they had before. His lips were redder. I began to pant lightly, like I was having trouble breathing. The air of the room became thicker, charged with electricity. I stared deep into Duo's eye as he moved forward, closer to me. Something was building.

And in a moment Duo shook himself and it was over. He dropped his hands from my shoulders and stood up, shaking his head a bit.

"C-come on, breakfast's getting cold," he told me, his voice shaking a bit.

Well, that was a rather anticlimactic ending.

I wondered about my reaction to that a bit, but dismissed it as a fluke of the moment. What else could it possibly have been? Perhaps I was getting sick, there was a nasty bug going around.

I sat down at the table in front of Duo. We both ate in silence, I could tell Duo was trying to figure out something in his mind, so I tried not to disturb him. It wasn't often that I saw him so deep in thought. Once we both finished, we cleared away the breakfast dishes and put them next to the door for Sara to come collect, as was our usual routine.

"Heero," Duo started, "I need to tell you something," he said nervously, then didn't continue. All this dodging around the subject was starting to scare me, which made me mad.

"What is it?" I barked much more harshly than I had intended and immediately regretted it as Duo flinched. "Duo, I'm sorry..."

"No, I shouldn't be running around like this. I have to tell you this. Come sit down," he said, and led me to the bed. I sat down cross-legged on the left and Duo sat down on his knees on the right.

"Heero, I... When I first met you I made this thing... a-a bridge between our minds so that I could see you..."

"You couldn't see me?"

"No, no, that's not what I mean. I mean I could see inside you..."

I must have looked rather appalled because Duo retracted the statement right away.

"No! I mean I could see inside your mind... Ahh! I could read you mind, alright? I knew what you were feeling!"

All this came tumbling out of Duo like a flood and I could see that it had been building inside him for a while. It took a minute for me to process what he had just said.

"You could..." I started, horrified. Duo had known what I was thinking? He had seen inside me? All my moments of weakness? All of my pain? Had he only helped me because he felt sorry for me?

"You could read my mind?" I asked him quietly, but my distaste must have been evident.

"J-just your feelings, and only the more powerful ones. Heero, I'm sorry. I wouldn't have done it but I needed to know your intentions when we first met and I..."

"Is there no way to remove this... bridge?"

"...Yes," he muttered weakly, "there is, but I didn't use it."

I was up and out the door before I could even think of what I was doing. Duo's voice from the doorway brought me back from my rage, but he didn't dare follow me. He had been inside my mind all this time, laughing at me. Laughing at how pathetic I was. Laughing at poor, stupid little Heero. I had to protect what little pride I had left, so I ducked down the corridors and formed plans of how to avoid Duo until he left.

What I would do after that was a bleak mystery, but I couldn't go back to someone who had deceived my like that.

I spent that night holed up in a storage closet under some old rugs. The stone floor was cold and uncomfortable, but I knew it was partly because I had been spoiled so much lately. It wold be difficult to get used to my normal life again, especially since I couldn't have Master J remove my emotions like before.

I spent most of that night and the next day nursing my anger with thoughts of how Duo had betrayed me, being sure to keep far away from the thoughts of how kind he had been and how happy he had made me. As long as I kept my anger, I wouldn't be tempted to run back to him, but it was hard when I would feel these huge pangs of remorse, guilt, and sadness every so often.

I sneaked down to the kitchen hours before dawn on the second day, knowing no one would be there, to grab some leftovers and, hopefully, something I could hide away in the closet in case I couldn't get back to the kitchen in the next few days.

The kitchen was dark, the fires having been banked for the night, and I quickly threw some wood into the fire so I could see better. Quickly and silently, I moved to the cabinets and started pulling out things I knew wouldn't be missed.

"Heero," came a quiet voice from behind me. I spun around, dropping a box of dried apples. My eyes immediately found one of the large table situated in the kitchen. Quatre was sitting on the other side of the table, a book in hand and a cup of steaming tea sitting on a saucer in front of him.

"Quatre," I replied, reaching down to pick up the box.

"Why don't you sit down and have some tea with me?" Quatre asked, then got up and poured another cup of tea from the pot on the counter, then sat it in front of the chair next to his and took his seat. I really didn't feel there was much of a choice in the matter, so I put the box away, closed the cabinet, and sat down next to Quatre. Uncertainly, I stared at my cup.

"I won't go back to Duo," I told him decisively. Quatre paused sipping his tea for a moment, then sat the glass down.

"I never asked you to," he replied calmly.

"So you usually sit in the dark drinking tea in the middle of the night?" I asked him and he chuckled a bit.

"No, I knew you wold have to come down for food some time and you wouldn't come if you knew I was waiting for you."

"So you want me to go back to Duo."

"Yes, and no. I want to know why you left him."

"He told me he could read my mind. He said he had this link to show him my thoughts."

"A sub-kinetic mind link. It can't transmit thoughts on this level."

"You knew!"

"Yes, I knew. I was the one who convinced Duo to tell you, though now I can see why he didn't want to."

"Can you help me remove it?"

"I could, but I won't. Not yet. If you really want to break your contact with Duo, he'll remove it himself before we leave. Just remember, if you break the link and refuse to come with us, you'll probably never see Duo again."

I nodded silently, even though something inside me was crying out. Never see Duo again? I didn't want that! But after what he had done, could I trust him again?

"But you really don't have to worry, the only thing that can be transmitted through a link on this level is emotions. You've been driving Duo crazy with all the rage you've been sending."

"I've... what?"

"Duo's been picking up on your rage and it's been affecting him. Haven't you been feeling any emotions coming from Duo? He's been pretty sad lately."

I thought back to all the times a quick but strong burst of sadness had hit me, an emotion that I couldn't track to any source, and realized they had probably come from Duo. He was sad that I left? But, why would he be sad? I was just a pest to him, after all, it must have been another trick. Strangely, it was hard to bring myself to believe that.

"So Duo's been feeling my emotions... and I've been feeling his?"

"Mm-hmm. The link works both ways. As much as he can feel your emotions, you can feel his."

"Then why haven't I?"

"You have, you probably just didn't know it. In order to feel the other's emotions at will you have to learn to follow the link. You can also send emotions across the link to make the other person feel better. Sometimes it's hard to control the link, right now Duo's so grief-stricken that he can't help but let his emotions escape to you, he wasn't doing it on purpose. Once you learn more about the link you could erect barriers to keep the other out of some parts of your mind or to keep them from feeling some of the things you feel, but you won't need that since you're severing your link."

"Why... why did Duo link with me?"

"In the beginning, he probably just wanted to know what you were doing, that you weren't going to kill or sell him. He linked with you to see if you were feeling greedy or angry. If you were, he would have killed you and the bond would have been severed, but he probably needed your help and didn't want to have to kill you. Of course, this is a dangerous and stupid way to find out someone's motives."

"Why?"

"Because if the person he had bonded with was stronger of mind and will than him that person, or creature, could have taken over his body and mind, trapping his soul. Because someone can only willingly bond another person to them, it's not often that someone's soul gets taken, but with Duo injured and linking with a stranger... it put him in a very dangerous situation."

"But I wasn't willing to bond with Duo, how did he bond with me."

"Heero... were you very lonely before Duo came? Even though you didn't understand the offer, sometimes a mind that is want for human contact will accept a bond just to be close to another person. You accepted the link without fully understanding it, but you did accept."

"Oh."

"Anyway, Duo probably didn't take the link down after that because he was too weak. Zechs told me Duo was in a fight with a dragon before you found him, right?"

"Yes. He had a large gash on his chest and had been bitten by one of the fangs." An image of a weak, injured Duo flashed across my mind, his eyes burning embers, and I felt a pang of longing that I was certain didn't come from Duo.

"Oh my. Duo's always been reckless. He's just been calming down lately, but... oh well. I'm sure he'll be fine."

"You don't think Duo will do anything reckless, do you?"

"I don't know. Duo lived for adventure before he met you, it's only reasonable that he'd go back to that life. But let's move to a better subject. Zechs is going to be lord of this hold, maybe he can find a position for you once we leave."

"Zechs is staying here?"

"Yes, with Lord J gone and no one in line to inherit the estate, king Trieze gave it to Zechs. Noin and Mei will also be staying, Sally is going back to Haven with Duo and me. I believe that's why Duo told you about the link now, he wanted Zechs to raise the level of your link. Otherwise he might not have told you about it until we were all back at Haven, he really doesn't want you to stay here. He still doesn't, that's why he asked me to find you and convince you to leave here, even if you don't want to see him anymore."

"Duo wanted to raise our link? I don't understand."

"There are only two levels of mind linking; weak and strong. A weak link is easy to construct and can only allow minimal communication. With a stronger link, you can not only feel more and deeper emotions, but even some thoughts. Even memories and dreams can be shared. And the range you can feel each other is much, much large than with a weak link. But it's difficult to raise a link from weak to strong. Both participants have to go into a trance and drop all their mental barriers in order for it to work. That's were Zechs comes in. It's fairly easy for people with magical blood to learn trances and such, but it would take months or even years for you to learn because of your human blood. So Duo was going to have Zechs put you into a trance so that your mind s could meet. You would still have to drop your own mental barriers, but the process would go a lot faster."

"Why would he want to do that?"

"Because he cares about you. He wants to be closer to you. That's why."

I looked out the window, the sun had just started to rise. Did I dare to believe what he said? That Duo had really kept the link because he cared about me? But if what he said was true, what had I done to Duo? How could I face him knowing I caused him so much pain when he only wanted to help.

"I had better go," Quatre told me, rising from the chair, "Think about what I said. And remember, even if you don't want to see Duo anymore, I can take you somewhere else, somewhere you can start over instead of this place, which probably has lots of painful memories. Duo'd kill me if I forgot to tell you that."

"Quatre," I called as he reached the doorway, "Where is Duo?"

Quatre paused, his face unreadable, "He's in your room, the old one that's the size of a closet," he told me, then left.

There was a sour taste in my mouth that no amount of tea would wash away. Quietly, I stood and walked out of the room. I began walking the halls aimlessly, letting random thoughts come and go. I thought about the time Duo had taken me to the roof to watch the sun come up. I thought about the jacket he had bought me. I thought about the time I had rushed out of the bathroom, when I was on Hell, so certain he had left only to find him standing there. I thought about the nights in my room, talking to him and listening to the sounds he made. I thought about the times before Duo.

I found myself standing in front of the door to my old room, a room that had never been more than a place to sleep. Even though the room was tiny and cold and dirty, Duo had given me a choice in whether or not I wanted to leave. A belated choice, but a choice none the less. And he would have stayed with me had I chosen to remain there, didn't that merit something?

As quietly as I could, I pushed open the door. Duo was sleeping on the cot, the light from the single widow played upon his loose hair. My blanket was thrown over him and my pillow clutched in his arms. He was still in the clothes he had on when I left.

Silently, I crossed the room and leaned over the bed. Duo's face was downcast even in his sleep and there were two shiny paths starting at his eyes and traveling down to his chin.

Tears? Duo was crying? Guilt overwhelmed me. I hadn't meant to hurt Duo, I had just been scared. I still couldn't believe someone would want to help me for no reason, that anyone could care about me. Had I ruined everything? Could Duo forgive me for running out like that? Was I brave enough to ask for forgiveness and face the rejection that might come?

I couldn't help but lean down and gently trace the cool tear stain on his cheek. Duo's eyelashes fluttered and he slowly opened his eyes.

"Hee-... Heero?"

I froze. I thought about running, but knew if I did that there would be no coming back. I thought about saying something, but I couldn't find the words. I opened my mouth, but no sound came out. Dejectedly, I looked at the ground.

"Heero, I-I'm so sorry. Please, I didn't mean to..." Duo's voice was thick with emotion. I looked up at him sharply. Duo was staring at the blanket twisted in his fists.

Cautiously, I crept up onto the bed beside him. He looked up at me with watery eyes as I slowly approached him. He looked so surprised when I rested my head on his chest and curled up against him. The emotions ran high and words began to tumble out of us both.

"...So sorry... shouldn't have left you..."

"No... my fault, I should have told you..."

"...didn't mean to hurt you..."

"...thought you were never coming back..."

"...so lonely..."

"...missed you so much..."

Once all the emotions were spent, all the apologies said, and everything forgiven, we both laid in the other's arms, emotionally and physically spent. And for the first time since I had run out, things felt right.


	18. Heero17

Heero POV

I awoke with a surge of panic. I was sitting up even before I had opened my eyes, trying to figure out what had scared me so much. As I oriented myself, I realized Duo was thrashing in his sleep next to me. He was moaning and tossing from side to side, obviously caught in some kind of nightmare. I had only a moment to feel the reversal of roles before I leaned down to comfort him, holding him and quietly shushing his cries.

He woke not much later. I was still holding him against my chest, stroking his hair, as I felt him start to stir.

"Hey," he said, blinking at me owlishly.

"Morning," I replied as he glanced around the room, some what dazed. He seemed to get his bearings, then collapsed back on top of me.

"I thought last night was all a dream."

"It wasn't. I'm so-..."

"Don't. We both made some stupid decisions, it's both our faults. Let's just let it go," he said, and snuggled back down into my chest. I would have liked to simply go back to sleep and forget everything, but I had to ask about something.

"Duo, Quatre said you wanted to have our link's level raised. Is that true?"

"Just forget it Heero, it was a stupid idea. You're not ready for that yet, it's alright," he told me, but I could feel his disappointment even as he said it.

"If you want it, I'll try."

"Really?" he asked, his eyes shining hopefully.

"Hn. I said I would, and I will, but I can't promise you anything. I might not be able to lower my defenses."

"All I can ask is that you try. Besides, you won't have to lower them to everyone, just to me. And you've already lowered a lot of your defenses to me or you wouldn't be here. I don't think it'll be as hard as you think."

"How soon do we have to try?"

"I talked to Zechs about this and the latest we can try it is tonight because we'll both need some time together to cement the bond and some time apart to make sure that we don't fuse into one being."

"What?"

"Sometimes when two people link they get too close and they become one, they think the same and act the same. Sooner or later they grow bored with the other and leave them, or sometimes they hate each other and kill each other. It's not often that this happens and it's usually only when people who are very, very much alike are bonded. Sometimes it happens when people are bonded but don't love each other, the people try to get close and make the relationship work but get too close. No one really knows why it happens, not even the people it happens to. The bond won't open all your thoughts and feelings to me, just the strongest ones, and sooner or later you'll get the hang at hiding things from me. Or so I've heard, I've never actually had a high link with anyone before."

"Really?"

"Mm-hmm. I was waiting for someone special, and low and behold here you are."

"I'm not special."

"Of course not. Everyone is trained by an evil doctor, rescues a demon, given hallucinatory drugs, and survives conditions that wold kill most people with a kind heart and quick mind. Yep, that's all part of a normal childhood. Besides, nobody has eyes like yours, Heero."

"You... like my eyes?"

"They're gorgeous. I heard some of the girls the other day saying they wish they had eyes like yours."

"You're lying."

"I'm offended! I never lie!"

"Go to sleep, you're going to wake up the whole hold."

"You're just mad 'cause you're losing."

"Sleep."

"Yeah, yeah. We're only going to get a couple more hours anyway."

"We're not going to get any unless you shut up."

"Fine, fine, just remember I- Gak! Why'd you do that? Unlike some people, I don't like the taste of pillow!"

"If you don't go to sleep right now you'll be tasting pillow permanently."

"Spoilsport," Duo muttered as he settled down and finally drifted off to sleep. I sighed, if that was what it took to get Duo to sleep on a normal day I'd be investing enormous amounts of money in sleeping pills.

Duo and I spent most of the next day relaxing. Apparently, Duo hadn't eaten since I ran out on him and he was still tired from all that work he did with the eggs. Quatre spent part of the day overseeing the departure of the eggs and dragon, and Zechs was trying to get the hang of running the hold, so Duo and I just sat back and relaxed. Duo got the bath he was in dire need of and I helped him dry his hair and wings. We also went up on the roof and Duo took me flying for the first time.

It was right before lunch, Duo told me on the way up that it was a bad idea to eat before flying in case you got airsick. Duo led me up to the roof and explained that, since he was going to carry me all the way to Haven, I would have to get used to flying with him. If worst came to worst we could get me some pills so I'd sleep the whole way there, but Duo didn't seem very enthusiastic about that option.

Calmly, Duo unfurled his wings and stepped behind me. My heart was pounding. I had wanted to go flying with Duo and I only hoped I didn't screw it up and get sick. Slowly, Duo put his arms around my waist.

"You ready?" he asked and I could only nod. Then, with two strong beats of his wings, we lifted off the ground. For a few minutes, Duo circled only a few feet off the ground, to see how I would take to it. Once he saw that I was alright, he stopped circling and flew over the side of the tower toward the surrounding forest. He took me to one of the rivers and we spent a while skipping rocks. Duo needed to see how I would do in a vertical take-off, which relies on wing power instead of up-drafts to get into the air. It was different that the take off on the roof because Duo had to beat his wings to get us up. We would rise a foot, then drop a couple of inches, then rise another foot until we were above the treetops. I could see how it could make someone sick, but it didn't do anything to me.

We only stayed in the air for about an hour and never strayed far from the castle, but I could have stayed in the air for hours. It felt so right, being in the air, high above all the worldly problems below, with Duo there with me. Had it been possible, I would have stayed in the clouds forever.

The sun was beginning to set when we finally got back. We were both starved and immediately headed for dinner, which was just being served.

"Heero," Duo called as we both finished up dinner, "We're going to have to go soon," he said, and I knew exactly what we had to go for. I was feeling a bit nervous, I didn't want to let Duo down, but I had promised I'd try, so I let Duo lead me out of the hall and down to the library.

"This is where we're going to up the link?" I asked.

"Yep, this is one of the places we both feel comfortable, but not invaded. We'd both be on guard if Quatre or Zechs came into our room, and they're both going to be here to make sure nothing goes wrong."

"What could go wrong?" I asked anxiously.

"I told you earlier, sometimes the two people become one. Don't worry, we'll be fine," he told me as we rounded a bookshelf and spotted Zechs.

Zechs was in an open area surrounded on all sides by bookshelves so it would be hard to see us even if someone accidentally walked in. There was a fireplace on the opposite wall sending out a warm glow, Quatre was curled up beside it with a book open on his lap. Zechs was in another chair, this one a bit further from the fire. In the center of the area, right in front of the fire, were two odd-looking chairs standing side by side. They were small, meant only for one person, and leaned back, so the person would have to be almost horizontal when they sat down. They both had small armrests and were covered in a deep red leather.

The library was quiet, the only sound being the crackling of the fire. There was a rustle of clothing a Zechs rose and led the two of us to the odd chairs.

"Heero," Zechs said, kneeling in front of me, "I'm going to put you into a trance. It's going to feel odd, but as long as you relax and don't panic everything will be fine."

"What happens if I panic?"

"Nothing, we'll just have to try again when you calm down, that's all, but it will put us behind schedule so try not to do it."

Duo reached across the few inches between our chairs and took my hand.

"Relax, babe, it's not that big a deal. Remember, I'm right behind you," he said, smiling at me.

"Heero," Zechs said, his voice deepening as I turned my attention back to him, "I want you to imagine yourself in the safest place you can think of."

I imagined myself wrapped in Duo's arms, buried under the covers of our bed.

"Good. Now, I'm going to count to ten and when I finish you will be in a trance. One..."

I could feel my body start to relax even though my mind hadn't relaxed in any way.

"Two..."

My feet and hands felt like they had fallen asleep and I began to panic when I couldn't move them.

"Three..."

A gentle squeeze on my hand reminded me to stay calm and I relaxed, realizing that I could trust these people.

"Four..."

I could no longer feel my legs or arms and my eyes were feeling strangely heavy.

"Five..."

My eyes slipped shut and I couldn't see anything but darkness.

"Six..."

The numbness traveled up my lower body to my stomach and from my arms to my shoulders.

"Seven..."

The numbness finally consumed my entire body up to the neck and started to travel up.

"Eight..."

I could no longer feel or see anything, only the sounds of the fire reminding me that I was in the room.

"Nine..."

I began to feel weightless, like I was completely separated from my body.

"Ten..."

All sound stopped and a was completely detached from anything and everything hovering in a black void. In a few seconds, I began to panic.

_Heero?_ Duo's voice called, though on some level I realized that I wasn't hearing his voice.

_Over here!_ I called back, uncertain as to how he would even find me in this void. A second later, Duo materialized in front of me.

_Hey,_ he said smiling at me, _we did it._

_Did what? And where are we?_

_We upped our mind link, duh! And we're between our minds. This is the place between both our minds._

_It's dark and empty._

_Says something about your intelligence, doesn't it?_

_Duo,_ I warned.

_Well what did you expect? Our minds are both too full to fit another person, or at least mine is. And besides, if our minds met they would become one, and I already explained how bad that is._

_So what are we supposed to do here?_

_Anything we want. We can look at each other's emotions, pull up memories, or just enjoy each other's_ _company._

_Emotions? Can we look at those?_

Duo nodded and there were suddenly strings of all different color and sizes coming out of him. They surrounded us like cobwebs, sometimes branching off, sometimes coming together, always disappearing off into the darkness. I looked down to find a few thin strings coming out of me.

_What is this? _I asked.

_These are emotions. They connect people to one another. Not literally, I mean, that'd be kind of difficult, but mentally._

_Oh. So, what is this one?_ I asked, picking up a green one coming from Duo. I suddenly felt...respectful, like I knew that the person on the other end was worthy of my respect.

_That on leads to Une, Treize's captain. She's extremely good at what she does, if a bit scary._

We spent a bit looking at the strings, touching some and looking at others. I found that some of the strings led to people who weren't even alive, like the one that linked Odin to me. It was a bit painful to see that one, but made me feel better, too. We both found a string of brotherly affection leading to Quatre, a brotherly affection from Duo to Zechs, a respect from me to Zechs, a complete and utter loathing from Duo to J, and a respect from me to J. I found that I had less strings than Duo did, but that didn't really surprise me. I hadn't had a whole lot of contact with anyone before Duo.

_What's this one?_ I asked, picking up a thick, dark red string and tracing it with my fingers. I had learned that the thicker the string the tighter the bond, and since Quatre's bond of brotherly love was pink I wondered about this one.

The string made me feel loved, but not in the way Quatre's had. This one wasn't a love of brother's this one was real, true love. I realized that it must have led back to Duo's lover in Haven. With a pang of regret, I traced it just a bit further, waiting for it to disappear into the darkness.

I let out a startled gasp as I traced the string to the center of my chest.

_Heero?_ Duo questioned, appearing beside me.

_Duo, w-what is this? What does it mean?_ I asked and watched his face for a response. Duo just stared at me for long enough that I wondered if I was going to get an answer.

_It's love, Heero_,he told me simply.

_I know that, but what's it doing going through me?_

_It's not going through you, it's going to you. I love you._

_You can't,_ I blurted before I could stop myself. Duo smiled.

_Well, I do. The proof's right there in front of you._

_But why? How?_

_Heero, there is no why or how in love. It either is or it isn't, and it is. I can't help it and I really don't want to help it. I love you, it doesn't change anything between us, I just thought you should know. I should have told you before now, but I didn't want to scare you off._

_Scare me off?_

_Mm-hmm. Some people don't like it when someone loves them that they don't feel the same way about. They get really freaked when it's a member of the same sex._

_But you're so great, why would anyone be mad if you loved them?_

_People are weird, Heero, sometimes they look for things that aren't there, other times they try to force them, sometimes they deny the existence of certain emotions. Lots of people just don't realize that you have to let things flow, things happen in their own time if you let them. And if they don't, maybe they weren't meant to._

I pondered that as I released the string. I wondered about Duo's love, if it was really unrequited. Quickly, I glanced around, hoping to find another dark red string. Duo must have suspected what I was doing, because he jumped in front of me.

_No! Heero, I don't want you trying to find if you-... if you love someone or not. You can't force love, babe, if it's there, you'll know it when the time comes._

"Heero, Duo, it's time to return to your own bodies," Zechs voice sounded through the trance.

_Saved by the bell, _Duo muttered as we began to part, each heading back for his own body. As I slipped back into my own mind, I felt a sharp tug. Like there was a rope around my waist and someone had pulled on it, but it was too late to look for the source as I was pulled back into my own mind.

I began to wake and gently reached to the side, trying to find Duo. I quickly sat up and looked around the room. I was in a large bed that I had never seen before.

"Heero?" Quatre called as I turned to look at him.

"Where am I? Where's Duo?"

"You two have to sleep apart tonight, just to be safe. Go back to sleep, we leave in a few hours," Quatre said then sat down beside me on the bed.

"You... where are you going to sleep?" I asked. It wouldn't have even occurred to me to worry about someone else just a few months ago, but I had grown attached to Quatre.

"I'll be fine," he said.

"You can sleep here, it is your bed," I told him, another thing I would have not done in the past. Quatre smiled gratefully, then laid down under the blanket, not close enough to touch but close enough that I could feel the heat of his body.

Quietly, I fell asleep, not as deeply as I would have had Duo been here, but more deeply than I had when I was alone. It was nice not to be alone.

The next morning Quatre woke me up early and we both headed down for breakfast. Duo grabbed me in a hug as soon as he saw me and I couldn't help but feel warmed by it. I still wasn't sure how I felt about Duo, but it was nice to know someone loved me.

We set out about an hour after breakfast. We had to pack light; Duo took a few sets of clothes and his scythe, I took a few sets of clothes and my blanket, which a packed with a raging blush on my face but couldn't seem to leave it behind. I had to wear the jacket Duo bought me and Sally had worn her thickest jacket too, but Quatre and Duo didn't bother with such heavy clothing, saying that the flight plus carrying a passenger would keep them pretty warm.

The first day of our journey was exhilarating. Duo carried me and Quatre carried Sally. Everyone came up to the roof to send us off, Zechs, Noin, Mei, and even Sara, who had been given the job of being Mei's nurse and nanny. I was a little surprised to find a little pang of regret when leaving Wing, I had just recently made some good memories there, but the realization that Duo wouldn't be there made leaving easier.

We flew high in the air where it was very cold and I grateful Duo had made me where the heavy coat. I don't know how much ground we covered that day, I wasn't even sure how far we had to go, but I know it was a lot. Duo and I spent most of the trip testing out our new link, seeing wheat we could read and send without going into that between place. We found that we could send and read messages, but we couldn't do memories or anything that required visual or audio aspects.

We munched on lunch in the air, which was an adventure in itself, but set down for supper as the sun was setting. We found a cave in a high cliff where we could easily take-off from. There was already wood and blankets in the cave, so I assumed this was were the others had rested on their trip down. That night Duo and I curled up in a small nook near the back of the cave and Quatre and Sally both settled down closer to the fire. It was nice to be back in Duo arms, I just hoped I wouldn't have nightmares.

A hope that was not fulfilled.

I found myself back in the small room J had kept me in when he trained me, books and papers lined the walls, stacked up higher than I was. Again I was a small child, forgetting all then the good things that had happened to me since Duo found me. Forgetting Duo and the others, remembering only what the small child knew

The room was on the ground-floor and my one window looked out over the courtyard. Outside, I could see children playing. I wanted to join them, but I knew J would beat me if I didn't get all my work done in the few hours I was allowed to study. J would take me out later to workout and practice my skills with various weapons, but that wasn't play. If I had any hope at all that the children would have played with me, I would have left the room in a heartbeat and risked any punishment I might have gotten, but they were all afraid of me, they ran when they saw me coming.

The sound of the children's laughter tormented me as I continued to scan the books and jot down notes that I knew J would look over later, just to tell me what I had done wrong. I tried to ignore the laughter and the sounds of children playing, but I couldn't and I felt tears come to my eyes.

Suddenly, the laughter stopped and everything was quiet except for the sound of someone bouncing a ball. Quickly I looked out my window. Standing in the courtyard, barefoot and alone, was a small boy wearing dark clothes and a long braid.

_Hey there_, he called to me and I could only stare out my tiny, bared window. _Why don't you come out and play?_

_I can't,_ I told him, even as the bars from my window disappeared and I found myself in the courtyard.

_Why not?_

_I'll get in trouble._

_No you won't. Look, your work's already done,_ he told me and I turned to find all my notes taken and all the problems answered.

_But Master J will be angry if he finds me playing,_ I told him, briefly wondering why I was so hesitant to do something that I would have traded anything for just a moment before.

_Then we won't let him find us,_ the boy said, taking my hand and pulling me away from the room. The feel of his hand in mine was comforting and in a moment I found myself in a grassy field far away from the hold.

_Catch!_ The boy yelled, tossing me the ball. I simply stared at the ball in my hands, _You're supposed to throw it back,_ the boy told me and I did so.

The game we played had no rules, no sides, and no actual points. It consisted mainly of tossing the ball back and forth while running and mixed in the games of Tag, Hide-and-Seek, and some form of ball game. The game eventually ended when the two of us rolled down a hill, the boy giggling like mad and me smiling brighter than I ever had before. We both reached the bottom of the hill and panted to catch our breath.

As I stared at the long-haired boy something struck me.

_This isn't right,_ I muttered quietly and the boy looked up at me.

_What's wrong?_ he asked me.

_This isn't right, _I told him, _This never happened. _The boy seemed to look sad for a moment as I fought against whatever spell he had trapped me in. Quietly, the boy rose and came up to me. I couldn't seem to find the strength to pull away from the hug he gave me, our two tiny bodies intertwining.

_I know, _came a voice, much older and deeper than that of the boy and I suddenly found my small form in the hands of a full-grown man with the boy's braid and beautiful violet eyes.

_I know this never actually happened, Heero, but why can't it happen now?_

My mind only had time to supply the word Duo before I found myself back in my adult body, still held tightly to Duo's chest.

_I don't want to be a burden, you've already done so much for me, you don't have to fix my mind too._

_Heero, you may not believe this, but this helps me too. My childhood wasn't exactly golden, if you know what I mean._

_Really? _I asked and heard Duo gasp, before the scenery suddenly changed and I found us in a dark, dirty back ally. Both Duo and I watched as a thinner, smaller Duo hid in a box with several other grimy children. On the other side of the alley two drunken men brawled and yelled at each other. The children cringed as the two men moved closer, all of the little one huddling together for comfort. I could see resolve come into one boy's eyes, a blonde caked with dirt who looked to be the oldest, and the boy darted out of the box and slammed into one of the men, then ran off down the alley. The two big men gave chase and I could see the little Duo run out of the box and follow them. Little Duo found the other boy sometime later, a bruise on the side of his face and blood running from his nose. Silently, Duo helped the boy up and hauled him back to the rest of the children, where they spent the rest of the night shivering from hunger and cold.

_Duo, what was that?_ I asked the retrospective man at my side.

_That was how I grew up,_ he told me after a while, _I was raised by the streets._

_But how? Why?_

_Don't know. Maybe my parents were both killed. Or something happened to them. Maybe neither one of them wanted me. I don't know, Heero. All I know is that I've never known my mother or my father and have never met any relatives. I'm not even sure I'd want to find them now, since they weren't there when I really needed them._

Gently, I took Duo's hand. It wasn't often that Duo let anything get him down, but I could tell he was in pain now and I wondered how often I had missed his pain, he hid it so well that it was hard to see even now, when it was in plain sight.

_I never knew my parents either, Duo. I was lucky enough to have Odin for a while, but... it still hurts knowing your own flesh and blood didn't want you. I understand._

I think telling him that I understood may have helped more than anything else, because I felt just the smallest bit of the pain fade.

_Come on, Heero, I'm too tired for any more of this tonight,_ Duo told me and I nodded in assent as the world faded into black and we both fell into a normal sleep.

That night may have been hard for us, but I knew that it had started the healing process for us both. Maybe, just maybe, we could get over the past together.


	19. Duo18

Duo POV

It's amazing the kind of stuff you can learn when you're looking from the inside of someone's head. I mean, sure, they can still hide their deepest darkest secret, but you can see all the other memories perfectly, and the coolest part is, so that your mind can keep them separate from your own memories, you don't actually see through the person's eyes. You're mind takes what the memory gives and shifts it around so you're a spectator instead of one of the characters in the little drama. If it's Heero's memory, of course he can shift into his body and relive the memory, the same goes for if it's my memory.

Memories were different from feelings. Well, duh, but I mean in our link. Instead of being ropes in a void, the link made a solid room that looked a hell of a lot like a cave. I often wondered if this was because we were in a cave the first time we shared memories, or we both just thought that would be as good a place as any. Anyway, the memories appeared as these big, multicolored blobs on the cave walls. Kind of looked like the cave had pimples. Or chickenpox. All different colored pimples and chicken pox... Anyway, as with the feelings color signified what the memory was like. Blue signaled sadness, pink signaled happiness and love, white was a memory in which nothing special happened, and so on. We started with Heero's mind, since he had a hell of a lot more white memories than me and we figured I'd take longer. Besides, we had only managed to do a couple of memories that first night, so if we hit his brain on the second night we could hit mine on Heero's first night at Haven and maybe it'd take his mind off the new surroundings. The problem with Heero's mind is that he had so many memories the same exact thing every day, work on books, work on the body, listen to J lecture about the nobility of following orders, how little Heero mattered, and how hot in Hell he would burn if he ever disobeyed J. Or something like that. Every time we went through a memory we would stick a little red flag in it, so we didn't look at the some one three or four times. Oh yeah, and you can conjure things in the links too, although Heero forbid me from conjuring any more hamburgers, saying they wouldn't really feed me at all. Spoilsport. Anyway, we decided to take a look at some of the more interesting colors of memories when Heero found me trying to pop one of the white ones with the stick from my flag. Man, did he ever flip! It's not like he needed that memory, he had at least a thousand more just like it. Yeash!

Anyway, while exploring I happened upon a bright red pimple thing. I was curious about it, since love was red in the emotion strings. Maybe red was a memory of hot, passionate sex? And since I definitely hadn't had sex with Heero, thins one had me a bit worried.

_Hey Heero,_ I called, _Come have a look at this._

Normally, I would have been surprised if Heero suddenly appeared out of nowhere, but hey, I had been conjuring things so I really couldn't complain.

_What is it?_ he asked in his normal, this-had-better-not-be-stupid tone.

_What is this thing?_

_I don't know. _

_Wanna find out?_ I asked, then grabbed his hand and touched the pimple without waiting for an answer. We were immediately sucked in.

There was a small forest clearing. At the end of the clearing, several targets were set up, the round red and white ones usually used in archery or throwing knives.

The bushes rustled and a large man with light brown hair stepped out. He looked European and wore European clothing, though so did the small Japanese boy behind who followed at his heels.

_Aww! Heero, you were so cute as a kid!_ I told him. I glanced over at Heero when he didn't reply only to find a blush growing on his cheeks. Interesting.

The man, who I would assume to be Odin, was holding two bows, a large one and a small one, and a quiver of arrows. He stopped about five yards from the targets, the little boy stopped behind him.

"Odin, wha are we doin' 'ere?" he asked, in his broken, accented, childish Japanese which translated through Heero right into English for me, since I wasn't good enough at Japanese to translate baby talk.

I barely suppressed another aww. Heero could only be three or four years old, five at most, and his words were still a bit hard to understand. His eyes were still a bit too big for his head, even though they were smaller than European eyes, and his tiny little hands were so cute!

"I'm going to teach you how to shoot a bow," Odin told him, speaking with a slight accent to his Japanese words that Heero's mind let me notice, though, being European myself, I never would have picked up on it.

"Reawy?" Heero asked and Odin smiled affectionately. He pulled of the quiver of arrows and set down the larger bow, then pulled out a couple of smaller arrows.

_He hand crafted those just for me, _Heero said, pulling my attention away from the scene in front of me. Heero had a look of sadness and longing in his eyes, but there was also happiness there. _I didn't know they were even for me until he gave them to me._

When I turned my attention back to the scene in front of me, Odin had taken Heero and helped him string the bow, and was now leaning down next to Heero, showing him how to work it. Heero pulled back the string of the bow as Odin instructed. Odin stepped back, allowing Heero the chance to try it himself. Heero let the arrow go with a loud ping. The arrow struck the target just one band away from the bull's-eye.

But Heero didn't seem happy. Instead, his long bang were covering his eyes, but the tiny little sobbing sounds he made revealed that he was crying. Odin got this affectionate little half-smile on his face and I could see where Heero got some of his faces from. Odin leaned down and picked Heero up, pulling him against his chest in a hug.

"Heero," he said, "You don't have to be afraid. You don't even have to do this if you don't want to."

Little Heero looked up, teardrops still in his eyes, "Reawy?" he asked.

"Of course. Come one, let's go back to the house. If you feel like trying again sometime, you can, if not, you might like some other weapon. Sooner or later, you have to learn to defend yourself, but you're a little young right now anyway," Odin said, putting Heero on the ground. Heero gave him a blinding smile that only a child can give, then skipped off down the path. Odin shook his head, smiling , then went to retrieve the equipment. Before leaving, Odin tossed a look at the target back over his shoulder.

"Damn good shot," he muttered, then followed Heero out of the clearing.

The scene shifted and we were suddenly back in the cave. Heero looked... deep in thought. He had a slight smile on his face, but his eyes were far away.

_Odin never let me forget that day, he used to tease me about it all the time. Told every hunter he came across that I was an excellent archer even when I was a toddler, I just cried every time I shot a bow,_ his eyes went misty for a moment, _God, I miss him._

Without missing a beat, I pulled Heero into a hug, letting him curl around my chest. His emotions ran through me, and I soothed them, calmed them, but didn't change them. Loss, sadness, the ache for someone who has passed is better to have than nothing. At least if you miss them, you can remember the good times with them, if you stop missing them you lose them completely.

We went through more of Heero's memories that night, but it took a long time for the pain in Heero's heart to fade. I wasn't really worried, I had realized quite a while ago that Heero tried to put off emotional breakdowns as much as he could. Heero had tried to morn for Odin right after his death, but he hadn't been properly able because of J. Now that he was safe and re-facing the memories, it was like he had just begun to morn the death of his mentor, the person he thought of as a father.

There were more happy memories, mainly ones about Odin. Like the first time Odin had taken him fishing and the fish knocked Heero in the water and Odin had to dive in to keep him from drowning. Or the time Odin gave Heero swimming lessons and Heero splashed the water so much he knocked a fish out of the water. Odin had to sit on the bank and laugh until he was crying after that one. Odin once got hold of a box of fireworks from China and set them off so Heero could see them.

After Odin there were almost no happy memories. There was once when Heero escaped from J and ran off to play in the fields during his training, but he was beaten severely after that so it couldn't really be counted as happy. There were a few memories where Heero felt happy in the woods once J had turned him into a slave, but most of the happy memories after Odin were ones with me in them.

There were also sad memories that had to be dealt with. I felt kind of bad, forcing Heero to face memories that would be better left buried, but I knew I would have my fair share the next day, so I didn't feel too bad.

The first memory we happened upon was the death of Odin. The small nine year old Heero being nearly drug by Odin as the city collapsed around them. The building exploded. Odin pushed Heero out of the way. A long shard of wood pierced right through Odin's heart and nailed him to the ground. Heero screamed. Rushing to his side, Heero tried to pull the wood from Odin's body, but even the older man knew it was too late and stopped him. Gently, lovingly, Odin smiled at Heero. Heero began to cry, hard sobs that wracked his body and Odin raised a hand to try to comfort him even as he faded away. Rough hands grabbed Heero from behind and pulled him into a carriage. Heero screamed and Odin struggled to get loose and rescue the boy. Odin's last words left him in a scream of Heero's name as J pulled the coach away and raced around the corner.

Later memories, of training with J. The first man Heero killed. Not just killed, oh no, that would be too normal. J, the sadist, gave Heero a garrote wire and told him to take down a 250 pound man. A little eight-year-old boy took down a mountain of a man... right in front of his family. That was when Heero first started to drift away from his emotions. The other missions solidified it, missions where Heero was walked into a room of people and was told to kill every one. Missions where Heero would be forced to kill foes that had already surrendered. The mission where Heero set some explosives off two inches, two fucking inches, to the right of where he was supposed to and a little girl and her puppy died. Of course, it wouldn't have been nearly as scaring had J not used it as a lecture in efficiency and told Heero over and over that the little girl's death was all his fault. Never mind that J ordered the operation in the first place.

But out of all the memories, the most painful ones for me to face where the ones where Heero was on the Hell drug. Seeing it from Heero's perspective was... scary. It made me want to just wrap him up in a blanket and hide him deep in the mountains where no one could find him. I understood, because of recent revelations, how Heero could be so detached that the Hell drug didn't scare him. I also knew that the Hell drug had been used on him before, but it was still hard to see how Heero could _not_ be crying in a ball in the corner somewhere.

Heero didn't even want me to look at the Hell memories, saying that the weren't so bad for him, but I had to see them. I had to know what he had gone through, what he had seen. Eventually, Heero would get over all the things that happened to him, one at a time, like some sort of delayed reaction. I needed to know what he saw so I could help him through it. In the end, Heero and I compromised, so that I would only see two memories of the Hell drug, one in the bedroom and one in the bathroom.

The first memory was of the bedroom. Heero and I were both lying on the bed. I was on my back and Heero was curled up on my chest like a kitten. His mind painted this odd light around us, like one of us was radiating it. I had the bed's purples sheets pulled up over the two of us, Heero's blanket peaking out from underneath the other blankets.

Everywhere the light touched was exactly as I remembered it, but beyond where the light touched was as Heero saw it. The blankets that fell over the side of the bed were dirty and torn. There were snakes on the floor trying to crawl up the sheets and get on the bed, but never made it up the side. Their tongues flicked out over the side of the bed, tasting the creatures they knew were there.

The walls were covered in dents and blood splatters, like something had thrown the bodies up against a wall before or after they had died. One woman in a tattered yellow dress seemed to have been alive when the thing threw here, she was still partially standing and had a hold of the dirty, bloodstained curtains. Her eyes, both still in tact though they were devoid of life, seemed to stare out the window into the ruins of the hold.

Outside the window were charred buildings and more bodies, the hold looked like some horrible monster had come through. Bodies littered the ground, like some kind of explosion had thrown them there. Nothing moved but the crows, the vultures, and a pack of wild dogs.

The floor was like a swamp, completely covered in about an inch of liquid, only this liquid was blood, not water. The snakes swam through the blood and would, from time to time, feast on one of the rats that came to dine on the bodies.

The bodies weren't too much of a surprise, since Heero had told me about them, but it was still horrible none the less. Some of the bodies looked like they had just fallen, a woman in her thirties and a man in his fifties. Others, too decayed to tell what gender they were, let alone the age, had holes chewed through various parts of them. Rats would eat at their flesh, so would the carrion birds, sometimes they would fight amongst themselves, screeching and hissing loudly.

Some of the bodies refused to stay down. They would stand and limp in any general direction. One, presumably a man with a brown hat and long coat, walked toward the bed while we watched. One of the rats was in his pocket, still gnawing on his hand. A snake had been hunting the rat when the man stood, the snake was still roped around him neck and through his eye socket. The men, who had one foot nearly chewed off, limped over to the bed and hovered above Heero and I. I was completely oblivious to the man, but Heero saw him and buried himself deeper in my chest. Slowly, the man sank to the floor next to the bed, unable to get passed the light and hurt Heero.

The scene shifted and we were in the bathroom.

The bathroom was both better and worse than the bedroom. There was less blood, less bodies, but the bodies that were there were worse.

Heero was curled up in the corner, mid-scream before I came rushing in. His clothes were tattered, dirty, with blood all over his hands, body, and face. There was a snake slowly crawling up his ankle, a cockroach making its way through his hair to his cheek.

Heero screamed and I burst through the door, radiating this ethereal light, and everything that became in cased in that light returned to normal. Quickly I dashed over to where Heero was and bent down in front of him, incasing him in the light, and chasing the roach and snake away, returning him to normal.

I shifted my attention from myself and Heero from the memory to Heero's memory of the room. The walls were blackened with dirt, the floor covered in smile. Here and there a body part would lie, I watched the Heero from memory swerve to dodge a head and an arm that myself from the memory couldn't see.

Instead of snakes in this room, though there were several of them, there were roaches and other bugs. The sink was rusted and cracked, brown water dripped out of the faucet. There were a few dead bugs in the bottom of the sink, more crawling up its sides and around the bottom.

The tub was full to the brim with blood, body parts floating in the concoction. The blood ran down the sides and mixed with the slime on the floor to create a brown color.

The little girl and her puppy watched the two of us from the corner as we crossed the room. She was as Heero had described her. Half of her looked almost alive, the other half showed only skeletal remains. Her dress was pink, with white stockings and tiny black shoes. She even had little white gloves on her hands, the common European style for little girls at that time. She had a small pink umbrella made of mainly silk and lace. Her hair was blonde and put into tight curls. Her small red lips smiled happily as her one blue eye sparkled. The other side of her was completely opposite. Her dress was dirty and ragged, covering bones and a few scraps of flesh. What little hair she had left was ragged and her lips on that side had gone along with her eye. Her dirty glove held a leash connected to a puppy made of bones. You could only see a scrap of the puppy's tongue, but he was lolling it, like he had just played a game of chase. The puppy sat, not still, for it moved its head so that its hollow eye sockets could see around the room, just as it must have done when it was still alive.

When I finally tore my eyes away from the girl I found that I had led Heero to the rusty, broken toilet. Standing in front of Heero was Dekim, the hand I had cut off still clutched in his other.

Dekim looked like he had been dead for several years, most of the flesh had fallen off his hands and one of his eyes was barely contained in his head. His face was a gray-blueish color with scratches that could only have come from the rats. He smiled, revealing dirty, bloody teeth, and spoke.

"Why don't ya gimme a kiss?" he asked, opening his mouth to reveal a tongue that was missing chunks out of its sides and a large maggot crawling out of his gums.

Heero backed up until he bumped into me even though he knew Dekim couldn't get passed the light barrier. Dekim closed his mouth and smiled.

"What? Aren't we good enough for ya anymore?" he asked in his raspy, broken voice.

"I think he just needs a good fuck," came another voice and I turned my head to see Barton, supporting himself on the wall because of his missing leg.

Barton hadn't held up any better than Dekim. His nose was completely gone and you could see the holes in his chest through his torn shirt. His pants had partially fallen down because of decay and the missing leg, you could see his semi-erect penis was missing chunks of tissue.

Had I been in a body with a physical stomach, I would have puked all over the place.

The scene ended as soon as Heero did his business and I dragged him back to the bed, but it was something that I would remember for the rest of my life.

When I woke early that morning, though it could have been later that night since time has no affect on us when we're inside the link, all I could do was cling to Heero.

"Feel better?" I asked once I had purged my mind of most of those images.

"A little. I'm still sad, but... I remember the good times too now. How about you? Are you alright?"

"I will be. I'm sorry I couldn't do more for you when you were..."

"You did everything you could, and it was enough. You saved me, Duo, you kept me from running away from myself again," Heero told me, smiling.

"I only wish that were true," I mumbled, too low for him to hear. The sun began to rise and I realized that in just a few hours, it would be my turn to bare my soul to Heero.

Oh joy.


	20. Heero19

Heero POV

Haven surprised me. Most of the time while we flew toward the capitol there was a vast plane of ice, sometimes broken by forests. When we neared Haven all I could see was a vast forest. As we neared the capitol it kept getting warmer and warmer, huge steaming lakes popped up and all the snow disappeared.

"It's the lava pools," Duo told me when he saw me staring at the lakes. "Haven is right on a fault line, so it was lots of volcanic activity. The lava rises close enough to the surface to heat the ground and creates these lakes. That's why it's so different here than anywhere else."

"Don't you worry about eruptions?"

"Nah. There haven't been any eruptions in the last few thousand years. There's a layer of rock right above the plate that's thick enough to stop the lava from coming through, it can't find any way out. There haven't been any earthquakes either, since this plate is stuck between a couple other ones and can't move. It's the perfect place to live."

I didn't reply, just turned my attention back to the scenery. It wasn't hot, it was still a temperature that you'd need a sweater for, but it was no where near the arctic temperature I had assumed it would be. It was warm enough to grow trees; something I was grateful for, since I had feared I would miss the forests of Wing.

When the castle came into view, I thought it was a mountain. It was one solid, giant rock face. Had Duo not pointed to the jutting landing stip where we would set down I never would have noticed there was even a castle there. When you were really looking, you could see some windows and dark-colored doors, but nothing more. Even the landing pad just looked like a jutting rock.

"A bunch of times," Duo told me as we neared the castle, "Haven has been able to avoid being attacked simply because the enemies couldn't find her; flew right passed and never saw it."

Our landing on the strip was quick and simple, one moment we were flying, the next we were walking toward the door. I held my breath as Duo slowly turned the knob and opened the door. I hadn't acknowledged it before, but this was a big step. This was the first time I would really see my new home. My new home with Duo.

The room I saw behind the door was a bit anti-climactic. It was a simple stone room with many hooks on the walls for coats and hats and such. There were a few chairs made of dark wood, intricately carved and elegant but nothing... royal.

The room, and I assumed the rest of the castle, was a comfortable temperature, so I followed the others and removed my coat and the pair of gloves Sally had given me.

The door was suddenly opened and a stately man wearing a uniform appeared. The uniform was all a light gray, the same as many of the rocks outside and the color of the walls of the room. There were some blue frills from a tunic underneath peaking out at the cuffs and neck, it also had black boots. On the pocket was one red rose crossed with a sword, some kind of insignia.

"His highness, King Treize requests you appear in his private dining hall as soon as you have settled in," the man said, then bowed and left.

"Man," Duo sighed, "I bet Treize just sent that guy to piss me off; he knows how much I hate the servants that have a stick up their a..."

"Duo!" Quatre interrupted.

"...the ones that are snobby. Never anything but business out of them, some of these guys take their jobs way too seriously. You won't get like that," he said, slinging an arm over my shoulder, "will ya, Heero?"

I wondered what job he was talking about, it would be nice to know I was here for something more than pity, but Sally was moving us out the door before I could ask.

What I saw outside the door stunned me. There was a huge room, so high that I could barely see the ceiling, with twin stairs right in front of us. Instead of the gray stone everywhere else in the building the room was made of white marble with veins of pink, purple, and blue quartz mixed into it. On the ceiling you could just make out several pictures made of crystal of what looked to be the clouds, stars, and the milky way. The stairs were inlaid with gold and other crystals sparkled on the floors and walls. Beautiful draperies, pictures, and sculptures were wherever the eye could see.

I hadn't realized I had stopped until Duo called back to me.

"Hey, Heero, c'mon, the king's a waitin'!" he called over his shoulder and I hurried to follow him, all the while gaping at the beautiful sights around me.

"Impressive, isn't it?" Quatre asked as we walked down a smaller yet no less beautiful hall. I could only nod and go back to my gazing.

"You should have seen Duo the first time he came here, a short little thing with a long braid, dirty clothes, and an attitude. He nearly fell over when Treize brought him into formal hall."

That comforted me a bit, at least I wasn't the only one to be overwhelmed by the beauty of this place. It was a little intimidating to think Duo had grown up in a place like this. Though Duo had shown me a memory of growing up on the streets, so he might not be accustomed to such high class. Still, he was very young in that memory and Sally had said he was smaller when he came here...

I'd find out tonight.

We proceeded down the hall and through a set of intricately carved wooden doors. Inside was a comparatively small room, though it was still large enough to fit about twenty people. A long wooden table dominated the room, with over a dozen matching wooden chairs surrounding it. Like in the halls, there was a thick rug that covered most of the room, both making it seem warmer and more inviting and dampening the echos that would come from having an all stone room.

At the head of the table was a large man dressed in a dark gray. He had short brown air and a red rose in the pocket of his military style jacket. Though he wore no lavish jewels or decorations, he had an air of control and authority that let anyone who entered the room know he was in charge. Sitting in the next seat was a land, dressed in a uniform style outfit of light gray. She wore glasses that gave her a sophisticated air and had her hair twisted into two buns at the base of her neck, a style that I had never seen before.

Both the man and the woman rose, the man smiled and the woman merely nodded in acknowledgment of our arrival.

"Yo Treize, couldn't live without us, eh?" Duo teased and I had only a moment to be appalled at his behavior toward such an obviously important man before the king responded.

"Ah Duo, the same as ever. Still bringing home strays, I see."

"Only the cute ones."

The King sighed in mock-exasperation. "Duo Duo Duo. Must you always have you mind in the gutter? When will you learn to appreciate true beauty?"

"Hey!" Duo squawked indignantly, "I'll have you know I've been a perfect gentleman."

"I'm sure it's been the hardest month of your life. Ah, Sally, my dear, you're looking well."

"No help from these two. Between Duo and Heero's melodrama and Noin's near constant fear of infant mortality, I've been run ragged. I need a week to get over my little vacation."

"Yes, Noin did seem a little over concerned with Mei's health when she was here, but isn't that to be expected from a new mother?"

"Over concerned? She wouldn't let Mei near the window because she was afraid the pigeons would peck out her baby's eyes! Paranoid new mother is more like it."

"Ah, but Sally," Quatre chimed in, "Mei was so adorable."

"You only think that because you're the youngest child. If you had younger siblings you wouldn't be one to talk. Kids are murder at four AM."

"So what do you think of Haven so far?" Treize asked me. I pulled my attention away from Sally and Quatre, who had begun to bicker, and turned to the king.

"It is very beautiful here," I told him.

"Yes, it is when you first arrive, but it gets boring after a while. All the gray leaves people a little dreary, which is why we have so much artwork. If it weren't extremely bad camouflage I'd have everyone here dressed up in neo green or orange or something."

I tried to imagine that and the picture came out simply ghastly.

"I think that would... surprise a few of your visitors."

"I agree! Some of the ambassadors would likely faint at seeing my servant dressed up in gaudy colors like that. I should do it just to see them gawk!"

"Someone planning mischief without me?" Duo asked, coming over to the two of us as Une joined the other two in conversation.

"Just thinking of ways to give the snotty ambassadors heart attacks."

"I must tell you, Treize, some of your servants are absolutely pompous!" Duo said like it was the worst crime in the world.

"They've grown lazy without you around to torture them. Just the other day I saw a servant open the door to you room without checking for a bucket of... what was it last time? Jello?"

"The green kind."

"They've started pouring sugar into their coffee without checking again too."

"What? I can't believe they'd be so brazen!"

The conversation went on in this line of thought and, I must say, I was stunned. The King of Russia was planning pranks with my Duo?

"Sir," another commanding voice entreated upon my thoughts, "I believe we should discuss the mess we are in with the dragons," Lady Une said to Treize.

"Of course, Lady. Sally, why don't you take Heero and show him around the castle?" he asked as Sally moved toward the door. I could tell he just wanted me out of the room so the others could speak in private and it sent a pang of longing through me.

"Of course," Sally told him, "I actually had something I needed Heero for anyway."

"I hope you find this place to your liking, Heero,"Treize told me, "As long as you don't mind, I'll room you with Duo. Sally can lead you to it if you feel the need to rest."

And with that Sally led me out of the room, the door clicking behind us. I followed Sally instinctively, most of my mind still analyzing what had occurred in that room. It was odd to see someone of noble birth acting so... human. Seeing Duo so close to a king, it made me think about our relationship. Was I really good enough for Duo? Did I really deserve Duo's love? Ever since we met, I had been nothing but trouble.

"Heero," Sally called and I blinked to find myself in a small, carpet-less room. It looked like some kind of medical facility; there were two small beds on one wall and several shelves with bottles and other items on the other. There were a few chairs and small table in the room, as haphazardly scattered on the floor as the bottles were on the table.

"Sit over there," Sally instructed, pointing to a small wooden chair. I sat gingerly and watched as Sally pulled out a syringe. I kept my shudder inside and looked away from the thing as Sally stabbed my arm and drew blood. I did not have god memories of needles.

"Treize is a bit overwhelming when you first meet him, isn't he?" Sally asked as she did something with the blood she had just taken.

"Does he always act like that?" I asked. Sally glanced at me and grinned.

"You mean like a big kid? No, he can be very serious when he needs to be, the only people he acts that way around are his close friends, it's very rare that someone outside our group would see that side of him."

"But he let me see it."

"You're part of the group."

"What?"

"What what?"

"What do you mean, I'm a part of the group? Treize doesn't even know me."

"So? He knows Duo, and Duo likes you, so he accepts you. Besides, Duo has sent him a couple messages telling him about you."

"So why wouldn't he let me stay during the meeting?"

"Heero, trusting you with himself is a big enough step as it is, but he really wouldn't be a good leader if he trusted you with the secrets of his country the first time he met you. Give it time."

"Oh."

"Yes, oh. You should think a little more before you jump to the conclusion that people don't like you."

There was a long pause while I digested her words, only the sounds of Sally's movements could be heard.

"What are you doing?" I finally asked.

"Hmm? Oh, this? Come here and see," she told me. I rose and moved beside her. She had the syringe in one hand and several vials of different colored liquids in front of her.

"You see, if I drop some of your blood in this vial," she demonstrated, the vial turned from green to blue, "It turns blue. Had there been any of the Hell drug in your system, it would have turned red."

"Why do you need so much blood?"

"Oh, I don't, I just like to torture you. Dummy! Why do you think? I want to be thorough. You never know what that drug might have been laced with, I have to check for a lot of different harmful substances."

I nodded and went back to my chair. Sally continued with her work for a few minutes, then set her things down and turned to me.

"Well, there's really not much more I can do right now. How about that tour?" she asked. I nodded and followed her out of the room.

The rest of the castle was just as amazing as the first part. There were huge banquet halls and a ball room that could have fit most of Wing inside. The gardens were especially beautiful, kept in the hottest part of the castle they were able to sustain all kinds of exotic flowers. There was even an indoor water fall and lake from an underground river. Everywhere you looked there was beautiful art or sparkling gems. It was a little overwhelming.

I was relieved when Sally turned the corner into a smaller hall with lots of doors and asked if I'd like to see my new room. Though I was a little nervous about it, I nodded. I really didn't want to be out in all this splendor anymore, it was making me feel out of place.

Duo's room had a thick oak door with a scythe and a rose crossed on it. Sally pointed out that Quatre's room, with a snake and a rose on the door, was right across the hall, her room, with a piece of clothe and a rose on the door, was right next to Quatre's, and Treize's room, with the customary sword and rose, was right next to Duo's. There was also another room with a special door insignia, a tiara and a rose, on the other side of Sally's. She pointed this out saying, "That's Relena's room. She visits here often, since Zechs is her unofficial brother, but you probably won't see her much now that he's gone. Lady Une prefers to sleep near her troops, which is why you don't see her crest. She has a crossbow and a rose, just in case you ever see that sign. Well, you look tired. Go get some sleep, I'm sure Duo will be up soon."

Then she left me standing there, staring at the door. I gave a small sigh and opened the door.

I was amazed to find that this room really wasn't all that different from our room back at Wing. The bed was the same style, only it was a bit larger and there were more intricate carvings. The bed had black blankets and sheets, instead of purple. On the floor was a huge carpet that stretched across almost the whole room. It was rather dark, showing mainly the night sky, but across the sky stretched a blue dragon, which, unlike the Chinese reds, yellows, and browns, were fairly common in cold areas like this.

The furniture in the room was different from the furniture at Wing. There was still a tall bookshelf, a table with four chairs, and a few dressers. However, there was also an odd-shaped table that I soon concluded was some kind of game played with small stone balls and sticks.

One the walls hung more draperies, most of them being red, blue, green, or purple to keep the room from looking dreary. There was a picture of a forest with wolves playing in the background, a beautiful rendition of a waterfall, and a rather unnerving picture of a volcano erupting seeing how we were sitting on a center of volcanic activity.

I was almost startled when fatigue washed over me, but I guess I should have been expecting it, since I hadn't slept in a real bed for two days and the trip had been rather taxing. The few possessions I brought with me had somehow found their way to this room, since I had left them in the small entrance room when we arrived, and I spared no time finding a small drawer to put them away in. Once that was finished I curled up on the bed, intending to wait for Duo, but fell asleep almost immediately.

I awoke to someone breathing in my ear, which is not a particularly pleasant sensation. I sat up to find that, somehow, I had lost my shoes, socks, and shirt, and had gained a blanket and a slightly snoring Duo. I smiled to myself, I was either losing my touch or trusted Duo enough to let him do just about anything to me in my sleep. I was kind of leaning toward the latter.

Gently, I ran my hand along Duo's braid, remembering the feel of his unbraided hair on my skin that first night. So much had changed in such a short amount of time, it was almost scary to think of how much my world had changed since the arrival of Duo, and what it would have been like had he never arrived.

Slowly, Duo stirred, his eyes opening and focusing on my face. I had become accustomed to his smiles whenever one of us woke up, and I was not disappointed this time.

"Morning," he said groggily, stretching. He took a moment to grab a small clock from the bedside table, looked at it, and amended, "Good afternoon, I guess. Man, we completely slept through lunch and dinner's not for another hour. Guess I'll just have to live on that breakfast we had. Oh well, it's not like I'm going to starve or anything."

"So," he said, turning to me, "Ever played pool?"

And so the next half an hour was spent with Duo teaching me the rules of a game called pool. It was pretty simple; you hit small, heavy balls with wooden sticks into a pocket of the table. The next half hour after that was spent consoling a sulking Duo, who ranted and raved about the "injustice of hitting every ball into the pocket on the first try."

Dinner, thankfully, was not served in the formal dinning hall. I soon learned that most of the "formal" halls were only for show, special occasions, and when important guests arrived. Food was usually served in an almost military style hall located next to the kitchen. There must have been a few hundred people in the hall, and about thirty waiters, but Haven seemed well equipt to handle them. It wasn't like the halls at Wing, where there was one for the nobles and one for the peasants. Just about everyone ate in the same hall here, though the higher ups seemed to all sit at one table.

Duo, Quatre, Sally, Une, and even Treize all gathered at one table in the dinning hall for dinner. There was also a man there that I didn't recognize. I he was sitting down, I noticed he was tall, a peculiar trait since he seemed to be Chinese in nature. He had the rose, which I was coming to realize represented Treize's empire, and what looked to be a fireball beside it on the back of his shirt.

Treize was still wearing the same outfit he had on earlier. I was surprised that he would appear before his subjects in such plain attire and also that he wouldn't even have a special chair or table, but I was starting to think that Haven was full of surprises. Dinner wasn't quiet or reserved, like Wing, and only once or twice did I feel someone looking at me and only for a second or two. Everyone seemed to gather with a group of friends and people could be heard laughing and joking all over the hall.

The conversation at our table instantly turned to me, since I was, as Duo so eloquently put it, "the new guy."

"So Heero," Treize asked, "What was it like where you came from? What are some of your hobbies, things you like to do?"

"Cleaning," Duo interjected, then covered his mouth like he couldn't believe what he just said. I gave him a glare and Treize raised his eyebrows in confusion.

"Umm, what I mean is... Heero here is... very... clean, " Duo finished lamely, looking for all the world like he was trying to get his foot out of his mouth.

"I was not needed for my original purpose so I did odd jobs in Wing. Most of which had me cleaning something," I said, bailing Duo out.

"Yeah," Duo said, with a relieved tone, then in a lower voice he said to me, "You know, you could have bailed me out sooner."

"I wanted to watch you squirm," I told him, a smirk on my face. Duo gaped for a moment, then decided to look affronted.

"So... do you intend to continue that career here in Haven?" asked Une. Duo broke in before I could answer.

"Actually, if it's all the same to you, I'd like to train him to be on the Night Force with me. If that's alright with you, Heero."

"What is the Night Force?"

"It's a special police force that I run..."

"Duo, you're the only one on the Night Force," Sally interrupted.

"Would you like to explain Sally?" Duo asked, then continued the moment Sally opened her mouth. "The Night Force was formed by Treize to hunt down thieves and lesser criminals. Before Treize came to power, there had been famine and war for years. Most of the land was owned by barons and other nobles, who didn't or wouldn't farm it. The peasants were starving and had no land. The cities turned into ghost towns, where half the population was rich and half was dying. The kids would migrate to the poor side of town, steal from the rich side, then hide out in old buildings or sewer pipes back in the poor part. Most of them were young orphans from war or famine, and had to steal to survive. In such tough times, the laws were changed so that any small crime was punishable by death. Hundreds of people were put to death for trying to get food to stay alive. When Treize finally took over, he tool back control of all the land and reappointed people to control them, then set up people to keep an eye on those people, and so on so that he could make sure everything was running smoothly. Treize had houses built and offered anyone who was willing to work the land housing. From there it's gotten better since we're now able to trade and make profits. However, a lot of the orphans who grew up on the streets don't know anything but how to steal to survive. They don't trust anyone, so they won't go to the orphanages or accept help from anyone. So I go out and bring them in. It's hard for most of the police fore to find these kids in the catacombs under the city, and they really don't know how to talk to them. They don't know anything, really. So I bring them here to the orphanage. If they run away twice I take them to Une for military training, but it's still better than living on the streets. You've gotta be extremely fast to catch the kids and sometimes they fight back, so it's pretty dangerous, but it's a great job. What do you say, buddy?"

I thought about it for a moment, but there really was no question as to whether or not I would join. To be with Duo, do good for others, and get to use my skills as an assassin for a noble purpose was more than I had hoped for.

"I will take the job."

"Not so fast," interrupted Une, "it's not so simple. You have to pass a few tests first that, frankly, I don't think you're up for."

"C'mon, Une, leave him alone. I'll get him into shape in no time," put in Duo, "He just needs a bit of training, he's been out of the field too long."

"What kind of tests? How long will the training take?" I asked.

"The tests are physical fitness and endurance tests. The training will be up to Duo," answered Une.

"You know Une, you don't have enough fun anymore. You should lighten up, maybe it's that room of yours, with the plain gray walls. Maybe I should give you a hand and..."

"Duo, if anything happens to my room I will tie you naked from a pole in the middle of the grand hall."

"Une! No need to be crude."

"The only thing crude here is your taste. Neo green is not a suitable color for a commander's room."

"Yeah, but it was pretty."

"And I'm sure it looked even prettier when you scrubbed it off."

"Humph. Anyway, Heero, since stick in the mud over here is making you take those boring tests, I figured we'd take a week and do some sparing and some weight lifting and then go from there. Sound good?"

"It is acceptable."

"'It is acceptable'" Duo mimicked, "Were'd you learn ta talk?"

"The same place you learned slang; I'm starting to think it's a language of its own."

I had to smile a bit when Duo huffed and stuck his nose into the air. The rest of the table burst out in laughter and, in a minute, even Duo grudgingly joined in.

"So, Heero," said the Chinese man, "is it true Lord J practiced sorcery along with his science?"

Duo went strangely still at my side. When I glanced over at him, he seemed to be deep in thought, but he soon shook himself out of it and gave me a hesitant smile.

"Not that I know of. Why?" I asked.

"Ah," Trieze cut in, "the two of you haven't been introduced yet. Heero, this is Master O, the royal sorcerer. O, this is Heero, the only person to ever render Duo speechless."

"Hey!"

"It's a pleasure to meet you, but aren't you Chinese?" I asked, my curiosity piqued.

"Yes. Why do you ask?"

"It's just that I have heard that China is not very... accepting of sorcerers."

"This is true, and yet they seem to make the most sorcerers out of any country, because of their close association with the dragons."

"Speaking of China," Trieze said, turning to Quatre, "will you be ready to leave for India in five days?"

"Yes, all the arrangements have been made. The maganacs will arrive in three days, then will need two days to rest and refuel. I'll be meeting the mercenary ships in Isabel's country, that's as far north as they'll come."

"Excellent, we can leave together, but I'm afraid I'll return before you. It will only take me three days to get to China six days there. Round trip should be about twelve days."

"I shouldn't be too much longer. With the maganacs ship it will take me eight days to get to the meeting point, a day to rest and refuel, a day to load the cargo, and eight days back. Eighteen days, if nothing goes wrong."

"Quatre's sisters run most of northern India," Duo said to me, "his father was a sultan or something, but there was a bit of a scandal about Quatre's mother not being the sultan's wife, or even an Indian, so he divided the estate among his sisters and left. Quatre handles all of our dealings with India since he still has so much sway. Besides, India, like most countries, is still pretty hesitant about selling weapons, so we need Quatre's connection to get them from some more unsavory characters."

"Weapons?"

"Yeah, Treize wants to be ready in case someone is trying to start something."

"And Treize must return the dragon to China personally as a sign of good will?"

"You got it."

"I see."

"I'm," Duo paused to give a large yawn, "sure you do. Well, I'm done. You wanna head back up to the room?"

I nodded and rose from the table. It seemed odd to leave that table without making excuses or apologizing, but it really wasn't a formal setting so none were needed.


	21. Heero20

Heero POV

When we got back to the room, Duo showed me to the door, somehow I had missed it, that led to our bathroom. I wasn't surprised to find that Haven also had indoor bathrooms. I showered first, then Duo. We both dressed and got into bed in an uneasy silence. I could tell Duo was nervous about showing me his memories and I was a bit worried about what that meant. Did he not want to share them with me? But... why?

"Duo, you know, you don't have to go through with this if you don't want to," I told him, although I didn't really mean it. I was a bit offended that I had shown his my memories, but he didn't want to show me his. I guess he picked up on my annoyance, because he smiled and took my hand.

"It's not that I don't want to show you," he told me, "It's just that... I don't know... I don't want you to see me any different because of my past. I... ah Hell, let's just do it."

And with that he connected us, plunged us into our link and his mind.

_So,_ Duo said, once we were linked, _what do you want to know?_

Duo's memories were shown exactly as mine had been, the multicolored half spheres on the walls of a vast cavern, though his spheres came in many more colors and shades than mine had.

_What do you think I need to know?_ I asked, uncertain of what to ask. I couldn't just say, "Prove to me that you're not a rich aristocrat and I'm not some lowly street urchin," now could I?

_We should probably start with Solo..._ Duo didn't even manage to finish his sentence before the memory sucked us in.

Instead of bouncing from memory to memory, like my mind had, Duo set his memories up in chronological order, so that I would get a brief overview of his past. Instead of seeing whatever memory Duo called upon, we would see the main events of Duo's life and some of the smaller ones in between, but all in order.

We ended up in a small back alley in a city that I did not recognize. The buildings were all two or three story and the streets were paved so the coaches would ride more smoothly. However, it was a dirty, smelly place. There was garbage in the streets and even the buildings were in need of repair.

_This is London, _Duo told me, _I used to live here, but..._

I boy with long, tangled blonde hair and ripped clothing walked down the street. He walked like he owned the entire world, though he was only about nine. Another boy, much smaller, only about six with short hair too caked with dirt to tell the color, tumbled out of an old crate and up to the feet of the older boy. The younger boy instantly got up and backed up a step, ready to fight or run.

"Ey, there," the older boys said with a thick English accent, "Wat's the meanin of this? Ye can't jus hit somebody then not say a word to 'em!"

"S-sorry," stuttered the younger boy.

"Well, 'at's more like it. Now, seein' as how ye scuffed me boots, I think ye owe me a bit o' money," the older boy said, sneering. The younger boy seemed to get angry, he frowned and growled, "I don't owe ye nothin'!"

The other boy smirked wider, then grabbed a hold of the younger's shirt. The younger pushed with all his strength and managed to knock the older over with a surprised grunt, then took off down the alley. The older instantly pushed himself off the ground and just barely managed to catch the small boy, grabbing him by the collar just before he would have ducked into a sewer drain too small for the other boy.

"Well now," the older boy said as he tossed the younger boy into a corner and blocked him in, "you seem to have a bit of spirit. I like you. Wa's yer name?"

The small boy only shook his head.

"No name, eh? 'At's alright. I guess ye ain't got no parents either. Well, I'm Solo, so I guess that'll make you Duo. If ye wanna tag along with me ye may be able to get a meal once in a while, ye don' look like ye've eaten in a bit. I'm a pickpocket by trade, I kin teach ya all my tricks. Wa'd ya say?" the boy asked, his smile real now.

"I-I'd like that."

"Well that's the first thing that's gotta go," Solo said, pulling Duo to his feet and leading him out of the alley, "Ye gotta stop being so timid or people'll take ya for all ye got. It's all 'bout attitude, kid..."

More memories followed; Duo playing with Solo in the mud. Duo learning to pick pockets. Solo finding Duo an old, broken yo-yo and fixing it for him. Duo and Solo picking up other kids. Dancing in the rain. Stealing from barons to mercenaries, from princesses to bar maids.

There were also memories of nights spent cold and hungry, huddled in a doorway or under a box. Beatings from soldiers and others who caught them pickpocketing. Days that they went hungry. Days that the other children died from the sickness that seemed to prey on them. Finally, a memory with only Duo and Solo, Duo holding onto Solo, and Solo holding onto life. I watched as Duo saw the light fade from his only friend's eyes, then saw him get up and walk away without another word.

From there, Duo stowed away on a boat where he met a man named Howard who agreed to give him passage for working in the kitchen. Duo got off in France and, in three years, traveled through Germany, Poland Belarus, and finally to Ukraine.

In those years, Duo got more and more desperate. Food was harder and harder to come by and I saw him eat things that the dogs wouldn't touch. I saw him steal, get caught, and get beat hundreds of times. I watched him jailed and waiting for the executioner, only to escape at the last minute. I watched as he sold himself, since it was the only thing left to sell.

The men who took Duo made Barton and Dekim seem gentle. Many times I saw Duo fall and wondered if he would be able to get up, though I knew that he had or he wouldn't be alive today.

It was in the Ukraine that I finally saw Duo collapse, too cold and hungry to even bring himself to care about his life. He was in a small, rural town with enough food to go around, but very little in the way of riches. I knew Duo would probably not have gone that way had he not been chased out of the last town.

Duo lay down under a tall evergreen tree at the edge of town, the branches nearly hiding his form. The night was cold though the wind was clam and I think Duo was finally ready to die that night. He had been sick for a long time and he was finally ready to admit that he wasn't going to get any better without help.

Duo was so tired that he didn't even hear the footsteps as they approached the tree, but he did feel the hand on his ankle, pulling him from the safety of the branches. Duo lashed out, managing to get his foot loose, and tried, to run, but only managed to take a few steps then collapse again. Then man came up behind him and lifted his light form in his arms. Duo was too weak to fight, so he just lay limp as the man carried him away.

These were Duo's memories, so I couldn't see what happened after that, since Duo fainted, but I did see Duo awake in a warm bed in a small room. Duo looked around just as a woman in a black outfit bustled in. Duo backed up against the wall, his stance defensive, but the woman would have nothing of it.

"Get back into bed! Are you mad? Get under the covers, you'll catch your death," she said, putting the astonished Duo back under the covers. "What were you doing out on a night like this anyway? Your parents must be worried sick."

"I don't have parents," Duo told her, coming back from his shock.

"Oh? That's odd. Father Maxwell usually keeps a good eye on the children around here. Where do you come from?"

"England."

"My that's a long way. Who brought you here?"

"No one."

"But you couldn't have come alone."

"I stowed away on a ship. The captain let me work in the kitchen for food."

"And from there?"

"I walked."

"All that way? Where are you trying to go?"

"No where."

"Well then, you can stay here."

"What is this place?"

"This is the Maxwell orphanage. My name is sister Helen. The man that carried you in last night was Father Maxwell."

"What do I have to do?" Duo asked, suddenly wary.

"Well, all the kids have chores, and you'll have to take lessons in reading and writing from me, and you'll have to listen to Father Maxwell's sermons, but that's about it."

"How often do we eat?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Food, do you feed us?"

"Of course we do! Breakfast is at six, lunch at noon, then dinner at six again."

"Six what?"

"Six o'clock, of course."

"When's that?"

"Early in the morning and late in the afternoon," another voice interrupted from the doorway, "I doubt he knows to tell time, Sister."

"Father Maxwell, how long were you standing there?"

"Long enough. So tell me, boy, what's your trade?"

"Trade what?"

"Trade as in what do you do for a living? How do you get money?"

"Any way I can."

"Have you ever stolen? Don't lie to me, I detest liars."

"I've stole. Had to, to eat."

"I won't have you stealing anymore. There's no need to steal anything here, we have enough food for everyone."

"I don't steal for anything but to keep my belly from rumbling."

The man smiled and turned to the nun, "Then you had better get him something to eat, Sister. I need to check in the other children. Oh, by the way, what's your name, boy?"

"Duo."

"Duo what?"

"Just Duo."

"Then from now on, you'll be Duo Maxwell. Welcome home, Duo."

Even as I watched Duo's memories, I could see Duo getting attached to these people. Father Maxwell and Sister Helen became the parents he had never had. The other children became the children of Solo's gang that neither he nor Solo had been able to protect. The Maxwell Orphanage became his first real home. And Duo became the happy little boy that he had never been.

Duo had some of his happiest time thus far in that place. Memories of snowball fights with the other children. Of always being full and having a warm place to sleep. Of Sister Helen singing to him and Father Maxwell teaching him about God's love. Sister Helen trying to cut his hair, then hugging him and crying when he told her about Solo and how it was his reminder of him. Sister Helen taught Duo how to braid his hair instead. Duo was happy at the orphanage, living as close to a normal life as possible.

Sister projected that Duo was about eleven when he first arrived, and they let him choose a day to become his birthday. Duo celebrated his twelfth and thirteen birthday at the orphanage before anything unusual happened.

"Sister Helen!" Duo yelled, racing up the stairs to her room.

"Duo! Whatever's the matter?"

"Sister I'm-I'm changing! I took a bath this morning and-and my body's different!"

"Oh. Oh! Duo, I think we've talked about this before. When a young man begins to grow up his body starts to change. It's all a natural part of puberty."

"Yeah, but...!"

"I think this would be a better discussion for Father Maxwell..."

"But Sister I don't think I'm changing right!"

"Duo, I know it's scary for your body to be changing the way it is, but it's nothing to worry about. When I started..."

"No! No, that's not what I mean! It's... I... Sister," Duo said turning around and pulling his pants down, "This is not normal!"

"Oh! Duo... Is that a tail!"

"Yes!"

"Why didn't you say so! Something's got to be done about that!"

"Gee, ya know, I never thought about that. Here I thought all boys grew tails when they got older."

"Duo this is no time for sarcasm. Father Maxwell! Father Maxwell, come here at once!"

"Can I at least pull my pants back up?"

"No, Duo, you have to let Father Maxwell look at that."

"Man, this is so embarrassing. Hee, that had a double meaning. Get it? Bare a-..."

"Duo, this is no time for crude jokes."

"Sorry Sister."

The sound of footsteps could be heard on the stairs.

"Sister," came Father Maxwell's deep voice, "Is something the matter?"

"We've been having a bit of a... problem up here I needed you to have a look at."

"Duo! Pull your pants up! Duo... Is that a tail?"

"Can I pull my pants up now?"

"Duo, is this one of your pranks?"

"I'm wondering if someone didn't prank me. Why the heck would I pull a prank that involved me having my pants down for an unknown amount of time?"

"Are you sure it's real?"

"Yes it's real. Hey, don't touch it! Ouch! It does not come off, thank you very much!"

"It's a little short but it might be... No, it couldn't be."

"Be what?"

"Duo, are you certain you never knew your parents?"

"I think I'd remember a thing like that. No, I never knew my parents."

"What do you think it is, Father?" Sister Helen implored.

"It's possible that Duo is one of the creatures of Europe, I think they're called demons now. I suppose it's nothing to worry about; there's nothing to do about it anyway. We'll just keep an eye on it and see what happens. Now, Duo, I do believe you have some chores to do."

Duo's tail steadily grew in, and then his wings. His tail could be hidden easily under his clothes and, though his wings could be pressed against his body so that he looked almost human, it was only a matter of time before he messed up and someone learned his secret. The village was a small, backward little place that had lived by the same traditions for many generations. When the villagers learned of Duo's secret, they were neither kind nor accepting about it.

Even though Duo continued to cause problems for them, Father Maxwell and Sister Helen tried to help Duo to adjust to his new body. It didn't help matters that his large black wings frightened some of the children or that it was hard for him to keep the sore and growing wings tucked away for long. Sister Helen made special shirts for Duo, tailored to let his wings out, and Father Maxwell helped to stretch the wings so they wouldn't be so sore.

Still it wasn't enough to keep the villagers from fearing. No matter how much Duo tried to be the same person he was before his wings had grown, and no matter how hard he tried to earn their trust, the villagers feared and hated him. Eventually, they took action.

Duo had taken to hunting in the woods for rabbits and other game during the winter. It had been found that he was a much better hunter than the other children, so he was allowed to go into the forest and hunt for any small game. It had been a bad night, Duo hadn't caught a thing. Wearily, he trudged back to the church.

As he neared the church, he saw something odd over the treetops. The sky was brighter than it should have been, like there was a light shining...

Duo raced back to the church, but it was too late. The building was on fire, nearly burnt to the ground. Ignoring the flames, Duo rushed inside to search for any survivors. Room after room held disappointment. Only the half burnt bodies of the other children were there. Father Maxwell's body, still asleep in his bed, had been burnt to the waist, so only his torso was anything more than blackened bones. Frantically, Duo raced up to Sister Helen's room.

Sister Helen was still alive, though barely. Her arms and legs were all burnt and bleeding, but she was still breathing. Duo grabbed her and flung her over his shoulder, then raced out of the collapsing building.

I don't think Duo ever noticed it while he was trying to save his friends, but his own body was being horribly burnt. His hands had been singed and the skin was falling away from his fingers, his feet were blackened with hot ashes. Parts of his clothes had caught fire and burnt away, leaving gruesome trails of blackened skin. Duo never even noticed, he was so fixated on getting everyone else out.

It was easy to see when Duo laid the woman down that Sister Helen was not going to live. The burns had fully engulfed her lags all the way up to her middle, her blood poured from beneath the burns and pooled on the ground. Duo, however, would not give up. I was starting to realize how painful it must have been, to lose everything and everyone, not only once, but twice.

Duo ripped off the remains of his shirt and wrapped them around the nun's legs. He was about to call for help, when she stopped him.

"Duo, love, it's no use," she said calmly.

"Don't say that! We'll get some help, you'll be alright."

"I wish it was that easy, little one, but I'm not going to make it."

"No! No, I won't believe you! You can't die! You can't! I won't lose you too!"

"Duo, just because I'm gone doesn't mean I'll leave you. Didn't you listen to any of Father maxwell's sermons? Silly boy, I'll watch over you when I'm gone. I'll always be with you."

"But... but I'll miss you. Please don't go."

"Don't worry. We'll meet again. I promise you. Now, Duo, you have to go... leave this place..."

And with that, she faded away, the light fading from her eyes. She sighed, and breathed no more.

From the look in his eyes, I could tell Duo was in a state of shock. I wasn't sure if this was actually part of his memory, or our joint minds recreating what must have happened. Duo stood, her blood still covering his body, and stretched his wings. He gave two strong flaps, then leaped into the air and flew away.

I won't say his flight was graceful, since it was the first time he had ever flown, but he flew until he had nothing left, traveling hundreds of miles until he crossed he was deep in the forests of Russia. When he landed, all he could do was collapse in the snow, unconscious.

I don't doubt that, without his demon powers, duo would have died that night. No normal person could have survived sleeping outside in the cold with horrible burns like those. As it was, the burns healed, but left horrible scars on his arms and legs. Duo began to wear only long sleeves and pants, usually black, in mourning for those lost in what came to be called the Maxwell fire.

Duo continued to wander, never staying anywhere for too long. He became something of a bounty hunter, killing anything from people to monsters for a price. He kept getting stronger and stronger, until he was taking on feral dragons. People started to know him as the man with a smile on his face and a knife in your gut.

It was another two years before Duo met up with Treize. Duo was on a wild path; he looked for trouble and sticky situations. I held my breath thinking, "That's it, there's no way he can get out of this one," too many times to count during those memories, an irrational thought since Duo was here with me now.

Duo skills and strengths increased until he was to the point where even I, at my prime, would have had a difficult time defeating him. His name was widely known, but not feared since he usually left good people alone, the only ones that were afraid him were the scum-bags of the earth, the shifty under lords and such. People knew how powerful a demon he was and avoided him, but people didn't flea when he came.

Duo had noted in his memory that it was three months to his designated sixteenth birthday when he signed up to guard a traveling noble on the way to one of the outposts. The war in Russia had caused death and famine everywhere, thieves and murderers had a hold over the entire kingdom. Most of the former leader's knights had abandoned their posts, allowing all kinds of mythical monsters into the cities. Because of that, there was always some town that would pay a sum for Duo to get rid of whatever monster was plaguing them. However, most of the towns were poor, so working for a noble payed a lot more than working for the poor towns and villages. It also impressed Duo a bit that this noble, whoever he was, had sought him out, instead of just hiring whatever men came. Of course, the noble didn't come in person, he sent two of his guards to find Duo and present him with the offer. 200 gold pieces, 100 now and 100 upon safe arrival.

"I see your lord is a shrewd business man," Duo had commented to the two men.

"Our lord is quite clever. Now what do you say about the offer?"

"Ah, why the hell not? I've got nothin' better to do. Lead the way, oh mighty guardsman."

Duo didn't actually meet Treize until they were already well on the way to the outpost, instead he stayed with a few other mercenaries that were also in the same deal. The path that led to this outpost was riddled with monsters and marauders. As the journey progressed, the other fighters showed themselves to be more and more inept. A few died, and more deserted. Of course, there wasn't anything Duo couldn't handle, but it was plain to see that he was getting annoyed by his fellow fighters uselessness.

"Man," Duo said, traveling behind the dirty caravan, "Ya think they could at least get rid of the thieves if I have to handle all the monsters. A gorgon! Who the hell ever heard of a gorgon being this far north? What the hell, she goin' to see her aunt or somethin'? Man!" Duo paused to see a small thief pull a shiny, golden object out of the wagon. The thief spotted Duo and took off just as a large man opened the door of the wagon and stepped out.

"Guards!" the man bellowed, but Duo was already off, chasing the boy into the forest. Duo easily caught up to the boy and cornered him against a large rock.

"Alright, kid, just gimme what you stole and I'll let ya go," Duo said slowly. Even I noticed that this boy, with dark, shoulder-length hair and dirty clothes, resembled a younger version of Duo. It was plain to see that he had been thrown off guard.

"Yeah right! Like I'm going to believe you!" the boy panted, then threw the trinket, which turned out to be a golden goblet, and took off running when Duo turned to get it. Duo picked up the cup and easily ran the panting boy down again, this time grabbing him by the shirt and holding him in the air. The boy kicked and tried to break loose, but settled down when he saw that he was helpless. He even began to shake.

Duo glared and opened his mouth to say something, then shut it again and glared some more. Finally, he drew something out of his coat and thrust it at the boy, dropping him to the ground. As he left, he growled back at the boy, "And learn to breath when you run!"

It would have ruined Duo's image if the boy had noticed him hiding behind a tree and making sure that the boy saw what Duo had given him. Duo smiled the first real smile I had seen on him since the Maxwell fire when the boy opened the small pouch and pulled out several gold coins.

The tall man, who I recognized as a younger version of Treize, was waiting for Duo when he returned.

"Did you get the goblet?" he asked.

"What's with all the fancy names? It's a cup. A big fancy gold cup. And, yeah, I got it."

"Where's the thief?"

"I let 'im go."

"You what?"

"It was a kid, prob'ly stealin' to survive. I let him go, got it?" Duo said, his tone defensive. You could easily read the shock on Duo's face when Treize smiled at him.

"Yeah, I got it. I'm Treize, the new ruler of Russia. And you are?"

"Um.. Duo. Duo Maxwell, your highness."

"Duo, I've been watching you and I'm impressed. What would you say to working for me to improve the capitol city?"

"Improve how?"

"Right now there are plenty of monsters to be dealt with, we seem to have an invasion of goblins and quite a few harpies picking off my subjects. After that I could use your street-smarts and talents to round up some of the orphans who refuse to go to the orphanage that is being set up."

"Alright, sounds noble enough, but let me warn you, if I start to see you goin' corrupt, I'm outta there, got it?"

"Of course. Now why don't we talk more about this in my coach?"

Duo was hired by Treize that day and became one of his most trusted friends, but it took a long time for Duo to fully trust him, or anyone else for that matter. It seemed that Duo had been alone for so long that he had learned to distrust people and it was unnerving to see the man that had been so open with me being so closed off with others. Eventually, Duo did come to trust Treize, Quatre, and the others, but it took a lot longer than I had expected, though I understood why. It went a long way to help their friendship when Quatre got Duo to talk to him about the fire, after seeing the burns Quatre hounded Duo until he confessed. It did a bit more when Treize had Master O heal the scars, since they still hurt Duo both physically and mentally.

Duo's job was first to destroy monsters, then become the first official dragon slayer, which had an official ceremony in which Treize presented him with a ancient scythe. Duo later retired as a dragon slayer to become the sole member of the Night Force, though he was still called to destroy monsters and dragons from time to time.

Then, of course, there were memories of me. It was odd, seeing our first meeting through Duo's eyes. It was weird to be with him as he defeated the dragon then sat down in the grass, injured. I tensed along with him as something rustled in the bushes, though I knew that it was only me. Upon seeing myself, I was shocked at how skinny I was. I hadn't remembered being that ill. No wonder Duo hovered constantly when we first met, I looked like I was about to die.

Though there were many snippets of memories about me, I didn't get to see nearly all of Duo's memories. That would have taken far too long, plus there were things that I knew Duo wanted to keep to himself, just as there were things I had kept to myself. Seeing Duo's memories was like reading a book; I saw enough to get the idea of the plot, but not every detail of every day. That would have taken far to long. As it was, we didn't even get to see Duo's full memories of our time at Haven. I wasn't too disappointed, though, because I already had one half of those memories.

_I think that's about it, _Duo told me and severed our connection. I was a bit disappointed, I liked being one with Duo, but I understood how vulnerable that had just left Duo, so I settled for cuddling with him as we fell asleep.

It was an odd twist of fate that I found myself going into his nightmares that night to calm him instead of the other way around. Odd... and comforting.


	22. Quatre21

Quatre POV

The day Treize and I were to leave came much more quickly than I had imagined. I wasn't really excited about this trip, the group of mercenaries that I would be getting the weapons from had sold to us in the past and were... a rather unsavory group of characters. Besides, I was kind of enjoying watching Heero and Duo's relationship develop, it was, for lack of a better word, cute.

I knew from the very beginning that Heero was just what Duo needed. I mean, it was easy to see that Duo needed someone he could take care of, but also someone who could keep up with him, who was Duo's mental and physical match. It did surprise me a bit how fast Heero progressed in his training with Duo, he was already becoming quite a match for my friend when we left. I was happy for them, and it was adorable to watch them, always laughing and giving each other these loving looks. It was also funny to watch Duo, who was obviously in love with Heero, trying to keep it a secret from everyone around him. Meanwhile, it seemed that Heero was also obviously in love with Duo, but unsure of how to show it. I figured I'd let them try it out on their own for a bit, but if they weren't together by the time I came back I planned to give them a little nudge in the right direction.

I smiled to myself. It was good to see Duo so open with someone. Even though he and I had grown to be the best of friends, he still had problems opening up to me.

"What are you thinking about?" Treize asked from across the carrier. The maganacs had come to pick me up and, since it was on the way, Treize had decided to ride with me until we reached China's border, when he would take his own ship. The maganacs' vessel was a levi-ship, a ship powered by rock that had been spelled to float. The ships were much faster and more powerful than regular ships.

"Just how much of Duo's blossoming relationship I'll miss while I'm on this trip," I said, smiling at Treize, who sat on a couch across the room.

"Ah yes, they are rather entertaining, aren't they? Do you think they'll be together by the time we get back?"

"If they aren't I plan to give them a hand."

"Do you mean that literally?"

"You pervert!"

Treize laughed and got up to refill his drink at the bar. The room we were in was a type of lounge and was actually rather cozy. The floor had a large carpet on it and there was a window behind Treize. The rest of the ship was more rustic and I had a feeling these rooms had been furnished by one of my sisters. It wouldn't surprise me, really, since the maganacs had been working with my family for a very long time and had formed tight bonds with all my sisters and myself.

Treize took his drink, I was surprised to see that it was alcoholic, since Treize almost never dinks, and sat back down on the couch. He sighed and seemed to brood about something.

"What's the matter?" I asked him, feeling waves of anxiety coming off him.

"Oh? Um... Nothing. It's nothing, really."

"You know, if I were Duo, I'd slap you for lying like that."

Treize laughed, but I could still feel that he was anxious.

"It's just that... I really don't like going on these visits to China. I mean, it's a great country and they have the most beautiful gardens, but..."

"They don't place a whole lot of value on human life," I finished for him. I had known for a long time that this bothered Treize. In a country that had a population as low as Russia, even the lowliest scumbag's life had some value, but in a country where the population exceeded the country's supply of food... It just wasn't the same.

"You know the last time I was there they gave me a... well, a whore! Just put her in my room and told her that she was my property and she had to do whatever I told her to. I had to tell them I was gay so that the poor girl could be returned to her family."

"But you are bi, aren't you?"

"Well, yes, but that's not the point! How could they just do that to someone? It's not just! And they've started selling their people into slavery again! How could they?"

"Treize, you know China is having trouble feeding it's population. It's only the help of the dragons that keeps them from starvation. Any person out of the country is one less mouth to feed."

"I know, I just wish it could be different. If Haven could support more people right now I'd have them all shipped there."

"I think that's a little bit of an unrealistic goal."

"I suppose, I just wish there was something I could do."

"I know, but you have enough trouble running your own country, don't ask for more, not yet anyway."

"I guess you're right. I should head to bed, I'll be leaving you tomorrow."

"Don't remind me."

"Not eager to meet the mercenaries I see."

"It's just that... they're such a bunch of brutes. I feel like they're going to start... I don't know, eating bodies or something every time I'm around them."

"I see. Well, just don't let them smell your fear, I suppose. You've always been able to keep them in line before, I'm sure you'll have no trouble this time. Good night."

"Night," I said, then decided to turn in to bed also.

The next day I said goodbye to Treize as he went off to the emissaries of China and I headed to India with the maganacs.

I liked it on the ship with the maganacs; they were a little rough around the edges, but they were a nice bunch of guys. I missed them at the capitol, but I knew that they'd never be happy staying in one place for too long.

Everything was a bit boring after Treize left... Don't get me wrong, I mean, the maganacs were great, but everyone had something to do. Everyone, that is, except me. At least in Russia I had something to do, being one of Treize's most trusted advisors, I was given the job of helping him oversee the running of the country, mainly I met with foreign bureaucrats and discussed politics, but I was also helped Une with tactical maneuvers of the army. On the ship, I mainly just did whatever odd jobs were available, I spent a lot of time helping Akber in the kitchen.

Things did pick up a little once we made it to the meeting point; a small rural town in India. I was fairly busy, checking the cargo and bargaining the price, which, by the way, was a lot lower than Treize had allowed for. I also had to make sure none of the cargo was damaged in loading, which wasn't really even an aspect, since the maganacs were extremely careful. After that, since it was or final day in town, the some of the maganacs and the mercenaries went out to have "a night on the town" as it were. Rasid and I were just securing the last of the cargo when they came tottering by, drunk off their as-... butts. I frowned and Rasid must have caught my look.

"Don't worry, master Quatre, we leave tomorrow and I assure, the maganacs will not be drinking on the ship. They just need to... relax once in a while. And the Mercenaries are celebrating, though I'm not sure why. They've reunited with another section of their group that had went in search of some kind of wreck, or so I've heard."

"Well that certainly sounds like cause for celebration."

"Yes, however, they underestimated how many people would be getting on the ship and over estimated how much room they would have. They're having a hard time finding paces for everyone. The last I heard, they were trying to add another section to the ship."

"I see. That's a shame, but... I still can't say I care for the mercenaries, even if they are just celebrating."

"I feel the same, but I believe they are harmless. At least, they are when they're being paid. Don't worry, they are no match for the maganacs," he said, his tone showing pride in the band he had put together. I smiled at him.

"Of course not. Still, the further away they are the happier I'll be."

"We'll be gone by noon tomorrow," Rasid said as we walked back toward the ship. On the way, we passed the drunken group and I couldn't help but overhear what they were saying.

"Hey boys," hiccupped one of the mercenaries, "Wanna have some fun? We kin leave ou' the kid for ya!"

"Yeh, you kin have Nana-... Nanish-... Nanashi. 'E's a lot of fun, if'n ya know what I mean!"said another, they all started laughing uproariously, though I'm sure most of them couldn't tell what they were laughing at.

"Heh, we'll even put him out for ya..." another one said as the group disappeared around the corner. I shuddered. The sooner we left, the better.

The next day was a scorcher. I had forgotten just how hot India could be in the summer. Rasid made me put on sun block before he'd let me outside, but it was a bit understandable. With my fair skin I would have probably burned in about ten minutes in that sun.

It took a few hours to get the ship back in the air. Lots of valves needed checked and other procedures they had needed to be done, the maganacs were very careful about their ship and it was one of the best maintained in the country. I had a lot to do that day, helping with the checks, but I kept having this feeling that someone was in trouble, I just couldn't get a good sign of where it was coming from.

The very last checks had to be made from outside the ship, the gages were under a panel on the hull of the ship. I reminded myself, again, to thank Rasid for making me put on sun screen and giving me the water bottle. I was sweating so much I wasn't sure I'd be able to hold the rope when I climbed down. It didn't help when, midway through my climb, I finally got a good signal as to where the person in need was. When I got to the ground I turned in the direction I had felt the burst of pain. The only thing I could see in that direction was a large boulder.

"Master Quatre," I heard Arif's voice call, "Come out of the sun."

"Arif, could you do me a favor?" I asked.

"Of course."

"Go check around that boulder, I keep getting the funny feeling there's someone over there."

"Of course, Master Quatre," Arif said, though he didn't look very convinced. However, he did as I asked, the maganacs had been around me long enough to know about my empathic abilities.

I went to get my water bottle refilled, certain that Arif would be able to take care of whomever it was. Which is why I was so surprised when I came back out to find several of the maganacs grouped around the boulder, including Rasid.

"Rasid," I called, "What's the mat-..."

I stopped dead. The group had parted to let me through and, at the center, revealed a boy tied to the boulder. His long arms were stretched above his head with a piece of leather connected to the top of the rock. His legs were tied stretched apart, one piece of a coarse looking rope wrapped around each knee, then around the rock, pulling them up and apart. His outfit was also made of leather. It was just small pieces of black leather, the worst color to wear in a desert, tied together in a costume that left most of his chest and legs exposed and left little else to the imagination. The skin that wasn't covered was burned a deep red, and what worried me more was that he was sweating very little, a sure sign of dehydration. His hair covered half his face, so that only one green eye peaked out from beneath his bangs. I was glad to see that eye was open, meaning he was conscious, but he seemed lethargic, another bad sign.

"What the hell!" I growled, startling the others, "Cut him down!"

"Of course," Rasid said, seeming to come out of his startled state and pulling out a knife. The boy saw the gleam of the knife and began to struggle, tearing the skin of his wrists so that blood dribbled down his arm. Slowly, as not to startle him, I knelt beside him and put a hand on his shoulder. He was so hot!

"It's alright," I said slowly, hoping he could hear me, "We're not going to hurt you."

The boy looked at me and, though I'm not sure if it was because he trusted me or because he was simply too exhausted to resist anymore, he stopped struggling. When Rasid finally cut through his bonds, he slumped down and I barely caught him before he fell forward.

"Abu," I called, "Go get me some spiced water, no ice."

Abu immediately raced to the ship as I set the boy up. The others, however, were not nearly so helpful. They all began talking at once.

"Where did he come from?"

"How did he get here?"

"What was he doing dressed like that?"

"What should we do with him?"

"Think he has family in the village?"

"Could he have been with those mercs?"

"I bet he was!"

"Should we return him?"

"How? We can't just go racing off after them going, 'Here, you forget your whore.'"

"They probably left him, didn't they say they didn't have enough room for everyone?"

"We could just leave him here, I'm sure the village could..."

"Enough!" I shouted, startling everyone into silence. I was sick of hearing them guess who this boy was when he was obviously in need of help. My reaction was enough to startle them so that they were quiet when Abu returned with the water. I sat the boy back against the rock again, poured a bit of it into the top of the container, and held it to his lips.

"Here," I told him quietly, "Drink this."

The boy seemed to at least notice me as I held the cup up to his lips and gently poured a few drops into his mouth. He swallowed once, then turned his head away.

"Hey," I cooed, "Don't worry, it's spiced water, it won't make you sick. Take a little more." The boy turned his head back and stared at me a moment, both his green eyes were exposed at this angle and they bored into me like they were trying to read my soul. Then I tilted the cup back up and his attention went back to swallowing.

"Rasid, we need to get him to my room," I said, taking charge of the situation, "Abu, Abdul, go see if you can find the doctor and bring him to my room. Arif, go get some ice packs from the icebox, get some help if you need to, but bring them to my room as soon as you can. The rest of you, prepare the ship, our departure will not be delayed if we can help it."

The group broke up as everyone rushed off to their appointed task.

"Master Quatre, are you sure it's a good idea to put him in your room?" Rasid asked, frowning slightly. I sighed, I had been ready for this argument.

"My bed is at least twice the size of everyone else's and there are no empty beds. And my room is the only one with its own bathroom, or did you think I didn't notice?" I asked and Rasid had the good graces to look abashed.

"Your sister... was very adamant that you have your own room. She payed for everything."

"I know that, or I would have protested it. Jade can be a bit pushy, can't she?" I asked smiling. Rasid smiled back weakly, then lifted the boy from my arms and began to walk toward the ship.

"Still, he could be some kind of assassin. I don't think you should be alone with him..."

"I can take care of myself, Rasid," I warned.

"Of course you can," he said, but I could tell he wasn't going to willingly leave me alone with the stranger; the maganacs are protective like that.

When we got to the room, Rasid put the boy into my bed. The first thing I noticed was that his outfit was biting into his skin, probably had been the entire time he was out there.

"Rasid, could you give me your knife. I've got to get him out of these clothes."

"If that's what you'd like to call them," Rasid mumbled as he handed me the knife.

"Could you get me some of Abu's clothes, too?" I asked, deciding that it might make the boy nervous to have someone as big as Rasid in the room while he was naked. "They look about the same size, right?"

Rasid frowned but nodded and headed for the door. I pushed back the boy's hair to check for fever. I was upset to find that, even though his forehead wasn't burnt, it was very hot.

Having decided that his clothes had to go, I knelt down beside the boy and pulled up one strap of the leather. The boy's hand shot out and grabbed my wrist with startling accuracy. When I looked at him his eyes were wild and frightened. Of course, I could understand why. He'd been tied to a rock, probably had heatstroke, and now a man was trying to cut off his clothes? It would be a bit much for anyone.

"Calm down," I told him softly, "I'm not going to hurt you, I just have to get these straps off you, they must hurt."

Slowly the boy let go of my wrist, but his eyes never left my hand as I cut away his clothes. His skin was still burning hot and the outfit had caused deep welts on the unburnt parts. There was dried sweat and sand all over him, but for the time being I was mainly worried about getting him cooled down, a shower would have to wait until later.

I reveled in how white the skin under the leather was; it was a milky white, lighter than mine even. I blushed as I pulled the rest of his costume off; he wasn't wearing anything underneath.

The loss of his costume also revealed how thin he really was. I mean, he had looked underfed before, but without the costume he looked down right skeletal. He was nothing but skin and bones; his hips, collar bone, and ribs all stuck out profusely.

Underneath my bedside table was a small jug of spiced water for just such an emergency, I pulled it out and poured some into a cup sitting on my table. Slowly, as not to make him dizzy, I lifted the boy, holding his head and pouring the liquid into his mouth. After he had taken a few sips, I leaned him back against the bed and put the glass aside.

Rasid came back with the clothes then and, after handing back his knife, I immediately sent him back out to see what was taking so long with the ice. I decided that the only thing I could put on the boy was a light cotton pair of Abu's short, since everything else would only add to the boy's fever. Trying to get the shorts on the unresponsive boy was difficult, not to mention embarrassing.

When I turned back to him, his eyes were closed and I couldn't tell if he was asleep or unconscious, but I decided that it would be best to keep him from doing either until the doctor arrived.

"Hey," I said, shaking him slightly, ever careful of the burns, "don't go to sleep yet."

I was relieved to see the boy's eyes open and move to my face.

"What's your name?" I asked, though I really didn't think he'd be able to answer me, so I wasn't too disappointed when he didn't. My main reason for speaking was to keep him from going to sleep, so it didn't really matter if he answered me or not.

"My name's Quatre. Quatre Rababera Winner. You're on the maganacs' ship, The Pride. Where are you from?" I asked and again, received no answer. I sighed, this was getting me no where and the boy seemed to be slipping back to sleep again.

"Do you think you can take some more water?" I asked and, this time, the boy nodded, acknowledgment that he heard me. I smiled and helped him sit up. This time, he managed to get his hand up and around the glass, but he couldn't hold it by himself and just that little motion left him shaking with exertion.

Again, I let the boy fall back against the bed while I put aside the cup. This time, though, he didn't fall asleep while I was turned away. Instead, I turned back to find him staring at me, or, at least, in my general direction. A moment later, Arif and a few other maganacs came bustling into the room and he turned to look at them.

"Sorry about the wait, boss, but some of the cargo slipped in front of the icebox door and we had to move it before we could get in," Arif said as they all began putting ice in strategic places around the boy's body. Ice went around his neck, under his arms, and on his groin. The boy jumped when they stuck the ice between his legs, causing everyone to laugh, but otherwise was very sedate, though I could feel that he was uncomfortable about being surrounded like that.

Once they had finished, the maganacs hurried out of the room to finish preparing to leave. I pulled the sheet back over the boy's body, shielding it from the few rays of sun the sneaked in through my window. I then pulled a chair next to the bed and sat down, holding the boy's hand and talking to him in low tones, trying to keep him awake.

The doctor bustled in a few minutes later. He was an odd man, he always seemed to have three things going at once. He was kind and gentle, like most doctors, but he moved with purpose, like he always had something to do. Not to say that he rushed anything, he was infinitely patient, just to say that he always had something to do. Really, I didn't even know the man's name, everyone just called him Doc.

"Well, well, Master Quatre, picking up strays, now are we?" he said, slipping a thermometer into the boy's mouth, "I thought that was Duo's job."

"I assume you've heard about Heero then?" I asked, as the doctor picked up the boy's wrist to check his pulse, then peeled back one eyelid and examined his eye.

"Of course, how could I not? Everyone's talking about the, 'strange young man with beautiful blue eyes.' What do you think of him?" Doc asked, flipping up the blanket to make sure the ice was in the right place. The action startled the boy and he jumped, I could feel the anxiety flowing off him, so I moved and took the hand I had dropped to make room for Doc's examination.

"I think it's wonderful that Duo's found someone that can keep up with him. Heero's a lot more grounded than Duo is, maybe he can keep him out of trouble," I said as the doctor pulled the thermometer out of the boy's mouth and peered at it.

"104," he proclaimed, "Not too bad. I think, for right now, the best thing to do would be to keep him in bed and let him rest. Someone will have to watch him, I think you can do that, and make sure he gets plenty of fluid," Doc said, closing my blinds and shutting off the lights, "You have some spiced water, I see, that's good. He can have as much as he wants, but keep it room temperature, no ice. Nothing to eat, either, I don't want him vomiting and complicating things. Maybe tomorrow we can start him off with something light," he said, packing up his things and heading for the door, "Those burns also need dealt with, but that can wait until tomorrow, I'll make up a lotion for them. Oh! And a shower tomorrow morning, if he's up to it, though he'll need some help. I don't want him out of your sight, Quatre. I'll be back later to check on him, until then just keep him cool, calm, and quiet, but I think he should be alright as soon as he cools down. If his temperature goes up any more make sure you call me. I left a thermometer on the table. I'll be in my office if you need me."

And with that, he was gone and I was alone with the strange boy with those beautiful green eyes.

I sat down in the chair next to the bed. It was a plush chair and extremely comfortable, so I would have no problem sitting there for most of the night. Again, I found the boy's eyes on me. I reached out and took his hand in mine, running my thumb over his knuckles. I couldn't imagine how frightened he must be, sick and amongst strangers.

The boy's eyes slowly gravitated from my face down to our interlocked hands, then back to my face. I smiled at him, I could see that he was tired, but his eyes were open wide. I could feel that he was still upset by Doc's visit. It took a while for me to calm him by talking to him quietly and humming a bit, but eventually his eyes closed and his breathing evened out in sleep.

Once I was fairly certain he was asleep, I got a book to read and settled down in the chair, only moving to take his temperature, which he barely came awake for, and give him something to drink, after which he would fall right back to sleep.


	23. Trowa22

Trowa POV

I could only remember bits and pieces of what happened after the mercenaries left me. The hot sun beating down on me. Voices. An angel kneeling in front of me with a knife hovering above. Water. Being carried, the angel beside me. Cool. My angel with the knife. My costume disappearing. Water again, my angel pouring it into my mouth. Blue eyes. Voices, people all around me. Ice. A voice, speaking quietly, in low, soft tones that I couldn't quite make out, but I liked the sound of anyway. Then I slept.

I knew I was in pretty bad shape at the time, especially when I started seeing blonde haired, blue eyed angels, but I wasn't sure just how badly I was hurt. I didn't think a little sunburn would be able to affect me like that, but it did. I was just so tired, but I felt I needed to stay awake until I knew what they were going to do with me, or who they even were. However, once angel got me cooled down and into bed, there was nothing I could do to keep from sleeping.

The next time I awoke was to the sound of footsteps in the halls. I immediately opened my eyes, my fight or flee instincts kicking in. To my left, angel was sleeping peacefully in an armchair. Now that my brain had cleared I could see that he was really just a boy, but he looked so angelic and the fact that he had white wings with gold tips made it so I could understand how I would mistake him for an angel. However, he was obviously the demon I had heard worked with the maganacs. I pondered him for a bit, I had heard stories about him and his lineage from the mercs, but I didn't know enough about him to come to any conclusions.

The door opened and I recognized Rasid, the leader of the maganacs, as one of the men entering. I realized that the maganacs must have decided to take me along even though I had been burnt. I wondered, hesitantly, if they would want me to... perform my duties in the shape I was in. The mercs would have, so I decided that maganacs probably would. There was really nothing I could do about it, if the maganacs didn't like me they'd simply leave me in the desert. The best I could do was to stay alert and minimize the damage they did to my body. But... Rasid was so big! If what I couldn't see was in proportion to what I could, I'd be hard pressed to take him even at my best.

"So I see you're awake," the other man said. I didn't recognize him, he was dressed all in white and held a small leather bag in front of him. He put the bag down on the floor and neared me, holding open one of my eyes with his fingers. I was frozen, not knowing what to do, so I stayed still.

"Can you hear me?" the man asked, then frowned when I didn't respond. I was barely able to keep myself from jumping when he lifted the sheet off of me and started collecting the melted bags of ice.

"I think these have served their purpose," he said to the other man, throwing the bags into the garbage, "The last thing we want is for him to get the chills."

The man pulled something out of his bag and stuck it under my tongue, I realized belatedly that it was a thermometer.

"Master Quatre has fallen asleep," commented Rasid. The other man nodded.

"I knew that boy was working himself too hard. Always needs to be doing something. I doubt he got a whole lot of attention when he was little with so many sisters around. Probably doesn't even realize this is his way of getting attention any more. Once I've finished my exam you can put him into bed."

"Are you sure that's wise? We don't know this boy."

"Do you really think I would have left Quatre alone with him if he could do more than lift his head? I'm amazed he's still awake, but that's about the extent of his abilities right now, he's helpless. Damn mercs, leaving the kid out in the sun like that."

"We knew they were scum when we first started trading with them, but I never thought they would do something as low as this."

The man pulled the thermometer out of my mouth and looked at it.

"101," he said, "That's much better. I think he'll be alright if he rests and get plenty of water. Though... the fact that he's still awake worries me. Better safe than sorry. Flip him over for me, would you? His back's the only damn part of him that isn't burnt," the man muttered, pulling something out of his pack and writing something down on paper. The bigger man, Rasid nodded in understanding, then moved to the side of my bed. My heart was racing, but I didn't let that show in my face. Grabbing my arm where it wasn't burnt, he rolled me onto my stomach. I knew what was coming next and closed my eyes, since they couldn't see it, and fisted my hands in the pillow. I waited for them to yank down my shorts and take me, keeping my body limp and lifeless. It only hurt more if I fought.

I was a bit surprised when, instead of pulling down my shorts, I felt them pull one side up. There was a sharp pinching pain just above my thigh, then nothing. I waited anxiously for something to happen, but Rasid simply rolled me back over and the other man moved away. Once I was on my back again, I noticed that the man was putting away a small glass syringe.

Drugged? Why would they have drugged me? My mind couldn't understand their reasoning, I was already theirs to do whatever they wished with. Soon, my eyes started getting heavy and I realized I wouldn't be able to stay awake much longer. At least, I thought, I won't feel whatever they're going to do to me.

The last thing I saw was Rasid slipping the blonde boy into the bed next to me and pulling up the covers. Then my eyes closed and I was lost to the world.

My next set of memories are disjointed at best. I felt the world shift underneath me and tried to pull myself into the world of the living. I barely managed to, and when I did wake up my eyes wouldn't focus on anything. The world lurched again and I grabbed for something to hold on to. My hand came in contact with something, but it fell away with a loud crash. Then there were hands on me, grabbing me and forcing me back down. I struggled, trying to dislodge my attacker, but was too weak. There was a small whimper and I was astonished to find that I was making it. Suddenly, the hands grabbed me and, instead of forcing me down, pulled me into a sitting position against something warm and soft.

"Shh. It's alright. It's okay, it's just a little turbulence. Just relax, alright, I'm right here," a soft voice said, running gentle hands down my back. Everything I had known for my entire life screamed at me to get away, that it wasn't safe to be around someone when I was so helpless, but it _felt_ safe. Maybe it was the gentle way he touched me or the soft sound of his voice, but I knew, I just knew that this person wasn't going to hurt me. Slowly, I relaxed and fell asleep again.

I've been a whore all my life, I've seen thousands of others boys and girls die because they simply gave up and didn't care anymore. They just didn't want to live. It was different for me, I had always wanted to be alive, and that's what had allowed me to live to the age of seventeen. There had been moments, short incidents, where I wished for death to end the pain, but I had always been able to force myself to get up, to keep living. There were many times I wondered why I would do that, since there was nothing in my life but pain and hunger. Even so, I wanted to live.

So I learned how to stay alive. I learned to stay quiet, no matter what, to never say anything that they could use against me, to hide all my feelings no matter how strong they were, and to stop hoping.

Of course, there were reasons for all of these rules. Never make a sound because if they don't hear you, they probably won't see you. You can't hide, because that would reveal fear, but as long as you were in plain sight and they didn't hear you, you might be left alone. The best idea was to never say anything at all, too, because they had a tendency to twist my words and use them against me, it was best to just be silent unless forced to answer. Never show your feelings because they can be used against you. It's alright to have them, just as long as no one knows you do. And finally, don't hope. Because every time you hoped and every time hope died, there would be a little piece of yourself that went with it. Hope too much, and you'd be nothing.

Those were the rules that I laid down for myself, that I followed no matter how much pain I was in, so why was it so hard to follow them in the prescience of my angel? I had shown emotion, weakness even, in front of him. I had let my guard down, I had made noise and forced him to notice me, and I had, somehow without even noticing it, I had begun to hope I could stay with this man. Hope could be a deadly thing.

When I awoke the next morning, I expected to be in agony. And I was, really, but it wasn't from being used, it was from the sunburn. The skin on my chest and face felt like someone had pulled and stretched it so it was too tight for my face, then ran a hot iron over it. However, I wasn't laying on my stomach, nor was my ass sore. Carefully, I moved just enough to tell that there wasn't any residue inside me that would have been there had I been taken.

Cautiously, I opened my eyes to find that the room was dim, though it had to be late in the morning. I looked around the room, memorizing my surroundings. On the floor was a thick, red rug. Broken glass from an ornament candle holder and the half-burned candle lay strewn about it. There was a heavily stuffed armchair pulled close to the bed, a table with a glass of what looked to be water next to the bed, and a dresser against the far wall. On the dresser was a small glass bottle and some kind of tea bag, next to that was several bandages and a piece of paper. Also on the far wall was a waist height book shelf, brimming with books. I scanned a few of the names and was pleased to find that there were several classics among them, including I few I had never heard of. I wondered if I'd get the chance to read any of them. Some of the mercs had let me read their books, and some hadn't noticed when I took them as long as they got back within a week, but a couple of them beat me for taking the books so I wasn't certain if I would try it.

Reading was one thing I prided myself on. Most of the mercenaries couldn't even read, but I had been lucky enough to meet on that could. Trowa Barton had taken me under his wing, teaching me to read and do maintenance on some of the machinery, so I wouldn't have to be a whore all my life. He even told me once, jokingly, that since I didn't have a name he'd name me after himself. Of course, he always just called me kid, but I liked to daydream that some day I could go up to someone and tell them, without any doubt, my name was Trowa.

Unfortunately, the real Trowa died in combat only a year after I met him. I never told the mercenaries about my name, I didn't think they'd like me stealing the name of their fallen comrade.

As I looked around, I found that I couldn't see the blonde boy. Behind me, I felt something soft and warm and looked up to find that I was nestled in the boy's arms, my head resting on his chest, nearly lying on top of him. Above me, the boy still slept and I wondered why he would be holding me like that when we obviously hadn't had sex. A few of the mercs had held me after sex, but their grip was more territorial, like they didn't want me to get away. The boy's grip was loose and I probably could have gotten away had I wanted to, but I was comfortable and, since there was nowhere for me to run, there was really no use in me getting away.

Eventually, the boy stirred and opened his eyes. I didn't know the boy, so I wasn't sure how to react to him. I stayed perfectly still in his arms, keeping my eyes open and on his face so he would be aware that I was awake. The boy smiled at me, his eyes sparkling in the most pleasant way as he sat up just a bit.

"Good morning," he said, his voice as calm and gentle as ever, "How are you feeling?"

Again, I didn't know how I should answer, so I kept my mouth shut. However, as the moments dragged on, the boy began to frown so that it was obvious that he did expect a response.

"Fine," I told him my voice just above a whisper. The boy smiled again, though not as brightly as he had before.

"Do you know where you are?" he asked. I nodded.

"Good. My name is Quatre. Quatre Rababera Winner. What's your name?"

"...Nanashi," I answered hesitantly. It wasn't really my name, but it was what everyone called me.

"Nanashi? Like Japanese for no name?" he asked, I nodded, "That isn't really a name. What do you call yourself?"

I deliberated over what to tell Quatre long enough that I think he was starting to lose hope that I would answer him. On the one hand, if he had known the real Trowa, he might be angry at me for taking his name. On the other hand, if I didn't tell him anything, he'd be mad at me for not answering his question. I decided that there was a lesser chance of him knowing Trowa than excusing my disobedience.

"Trowa," I told him quietly. He beamed.

"Well, Trowa, it's nice to meet you," he said, then threw off the covers, slipped out from under me, and climbed out of bed. Flipping open a door on the bedside table, he pulled out a bottle and poured its contents into a glass, then offered it to me. I sat up and took it, drinking the contents which I recognized as the slightly sweetened water I had been given before. Spiced water, Quatre had called it.

"So," Quatre said, taking the glass and putting it aside, "do you think you can stand?" he asked. Quickly, I assessed myself and found that, though I was weakened, I should be able to stand. I nodded once and swung my legs over the side of the bed and sat up in one swift motion. A motion that left my head spinning so that I almost toppled to the floor. It was only Quatre's quick intervention that stopped me from falling, he instantly grabbed my shoulders and righted me. He must have soon seen that I couldn't sit on my own, for he sat down beside me and let me lean on him as I tried to stop the room from spinning and quiet my angry stomach. It was a few minutes before I was sound enough to look up.

"Sorry," I mumbled, hoping he wasn't angry. He simply smiled again, concern in his eyes though his voice was gentle.

"No, it's my fault. I should have warned you, you've been on you back since we picked you up yesterday, you'll have to take it slow. The only time you were up at all last night was for drinks and when you had a small panic attack as the ship hit some turbulence and shook us up a bit. But you might not even remember that."

Quatre moved away from me and I found that, since the spinning had stopped, I could sit up on my own. I was amazed at how weak I felt, though. I knew I would be hard pressed to stand if he asked me to.

He was watching me, watching my face. The mercs had done that, too, but they had been looking for signs of weakness when they did it. I didn't feel like I had when they had done it, like I had to make my face be stone or they'd see how frightened I was. Actually, I didn't feel afraid of this boy at all, but I knew that he was very powerful and I was still careful not to show him how I felt.

"Do you think you could eat something?" he asked me. I was hungry enough that I would have risked a trip to the galley back on the old ship, which contained a highly unpleasant cook, several surly men that didn't have the skills to become a real merc, and some mercs that had committed crimes against the captain of the mercenary ship and were being punished. None of which were very helpful toward me, I tried to avoid them at all costs. Figuring that if I had risked all that to get a meal on the merc ship I could at least nod to the blonde haired boy.

Quatre smiled and turned away from me, walking to the door. He opened it and called to someone in the hall, then closed the door and came back to me. He glanced from me to the plush chair, a frown on his face.

"I think we should have you sitting while you eat, it might tire you less than sitting on the edge of the bed like this. Don't try this on your own, let me help," he said, carefully reaching down to me. I wasn't sure how to react; in general, I don't like to be touched. My body has learned that touch usually means pain, so that I try to avoid human contact. But there was nothing I could do. My own rule not to show fear kept me from flinching away, so I stayed stock still as he grabbed me gently under the arm where I wasn't burnt and pulled me up from the bed.

Quatre looked small and weak, but he was truly neither. He was a little under average height, but still not to be considered short. And in those few minutes I lay on top of him I felt a bit of muscle tone on his arms telling me that he wasn't as scrawny as he looked either.

Still, I am above average height, though probably below average weight, and I didn't expect him to be able to hold much of my weight.

Taking one arm, he pulled me out of the chair supporting nearly all my weight easily. He moved, ever conscious of how he was holding me, the few feet to the chair and let me down. I had barely even had to shuffle my feet to get to the chair as he nearly dragged me.

Of course, I am more than aware that most of this is due to the fact that I was drastically underweight at the time, but I was still impressed. Quatre was a demon, and most demons were considered nobles in our country. Not only that, but his father had been a sheik, though his mother was said to be a normal human. I had thought that someone like him would have been spoiled and useless, needing to be pampered at all times. So far, Quatre had only shown himself to be kind and gentle. I was still wary, because I had known some of the worst people alive to look kind and gentle on the outside, but somehow I didn't think Quatre would be like that.

I sagged against the chair, so tired that I didn't even notice Quatre had left until I heard him open the door and enter again. He was carrying a small tray and smiling warmly. Quickly, he set the tray on a small table and pulled the chair, with me still sitting in it, over to the table.

"I hope you don't mind oatmeal. Doc didn't want you to have anything that might upset your stomach," he said, handing me the spoon. I took it and slowly put it in the light brown oatmeal, so tired that I could barely hold the spoon. I was shaking with exhaustion from the simple task of being moved from the bed to the chair. It was pathetic.

Quatre had busied himself with straightening out the bed linens, so I allowed myself a second to rest before trying to get the spoon from the bowl to my mouth. After a moment, I lifted the spoon out of the bowl and tried to get it to my mouth. It felt like it weighed a ton and my hand continued to shake no matter how hard I tried to coax it to stop. I was so tired.

I think I knew what was going to happen even before it did. I saw my hand suddenly stop shaking and fall to my lap, losing its grip on the spoon. Quatre gave a startled gasp and I realized that he must have turned around without me noticing. Deftly, his nimble fingers caught the spoon and all the oatmeal that had slipped out, keeping it from landing on my burnt leg.

There was a moment of silence where neither of us moved, then Quatre sighed and turned to smile at me.

"You should have said something. This would have hurt landing on your burnt leg like that," he told me, then put the spoon back in the bowl and walked through a door. There was the sound of running water and Quatre returned wiping his hands on a towel. I wondered if he was going to take the food away, but didn't have the courage to ask.

Quatre set the towel across my legs and knelt before me. Though I was surprised, I managed not to show it, that or Quatre didn't notice. Even more surprising than when he sat at my knees was when he picked up the spoon and held it in front of my mouth. I was so shocked that I couldn't move for a second, I simply stared at the utensil at my lips.

"Come on, I promise it's good," Quatre urged and I opened my lips immediately.

The oatmeal was warm and sweet, the taste of brown sugar and honey. It was also the first thing I had eaten in over three days, serving to make it all the sweeter. I would have taken the time to savor the taste and commit it to memory had Quatre not moved to get a second spoonful immediately after depositing the first. Instead, I let the warm food slide down my throat and opened my mouth for more.

After years of living on the brink of starvation, I had learned a little about eating habits. It had been three days since my last meal, and though I felt like I should have been able to eat anything and everything set in front of me, I was not surprised when I felt myself grow full after a surprisingly small amount. I knew not to force myself to eat, since that would only end in vomiting. Usually, if I had enough food I would simply stash some away, but that was not an option with Quatre so close to me. Instead, I simply shook my head when Quatre offered me a mouthful of the sweet treat. Quatre frowned in worry, but there was understanding in his eyes and I was glad he wouldn't try to force feed me.

"If you get hungry again, just tell me," Quatre said, rising and putting aside the dish, "What do you think, do you want to sleep some more? I think that would be best, you look exhausted. Come on," he said, and helped me back into bed. With my stomach full and my strength waning, it was only a matter of seconds after my head hit the pillow before I was sound asleep.


	24. Trowa23

Trowa POV

When I awoke, Quatre was still in the room, quietly reading a book in the corner. The bowl of oatmeal was gone, but there was a pitcher of orange juice setting on the small table. Quatre was sitting in the chair next to it, reading a book and eating an apple in a casual manner.

Someone had cleaned the glass from the carpet and, oddly, there was no doubt in my mind that it had been Quatre. I also realized that it was probably me who broke the candle last night, but Quatre hadn't said anything so I didn't ask.

I felt strangely content, sitting there in that bed, with Quatre close by, like everything in the world in that instant was perfect. I savored the moment, but it was as fleeting as I had expected it to be and ended when Quatre turned his head to look at me. He smiled, the way he had every time I had awakened, and closed the book, putting aside the apple.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Fine," I muttered quietly.

"Do you think you're up to a shower? I'd like to get you cooled down a bit more and wash off those burns so they don't get infected."

I pushed the blanket off, again amazed at how weak I was, and began to sit up. Quatre instantly jumped up from his chair, giving me a remanding little frown, and helped me to the bathroom.

The bathroom was small, meant for only one person, but there was just enough room for the two of us to move around. The room was bright, lit by the same glowing spheres as the rest of the ship. I had seen the spheres before once or twice in the captain's room on the merc ship, but only briefly because he preferred to take me in the dark. To me, the lights were magical, though I didn't doubt that I was simply naive.

There was a small sink to my back with a cabinet over top of it. Beside the sink was a small, low-flow toilet. I had heard of the toilets, but never seen one. Water was as expensive as gold in the desert, it seemed somewhat sacrilegious to see it wasted so. I had never seen a shower before, also, though the small, glass enclosed box with a nozzle protruding from the top was disappointing compared to the stories I'd heard of a rain machine.

I was clad only in loose-fitting shorts already, so it took only a second for Quatre to pull them down and remove them from me, though it made me quite a bit more anxious to lose the small piece of material. My anxiety turned to an all out fear when Quatre began removing his own clothes as I sat on the lid of the toilet where he had set me. It was with a bit of relief that I noted Quatre had left his underwear on.

I also noted, to my surprise, how smooth Quatre's skin was and how well it moved over his muscles. Muscles that were lean and stringing, but there none the less. I had no doubt that, in my current weakened state, Quatre could easily overpower me. Oddly enough, this thought didn't cause me to shut down, to retreat into a part of myself that could allow the things I was powerless to stop from happening. It was as though some part of me didn't believe that Quatre would hurt me. The thought was ludicrous.

Quatre opened the door to the shower and stepped in. I leaned forward a bit so I could see him turn the knobs on the wall. A sudden jet of water flew from the nozzle, splitting into droplets like rain. I watched in awe as Quatre raised his hand and tested the water, then adjusted the knobs again before closing the door and turning to me.

Gently, he pulled me from the chair and, supporting me under the arm, led me to the shower and pushed me inside. The spray of water that hit my skin felt icy and soothing at the same time. I shivered and reflexively tried to back out of the icy water, but Quatre, who was entering behind me, pushed me forward again and shut the door.

"I should have warned you the water would feel cold," he told me as he began turning me under the spray of water, trying to wet all of my burnt skin, "The water is actually just a bit cool, but your sunburn must be making it feel icy."

Quatre took a rag and soap and, as gently as he could, began to wash my skin. The water dulled the pain up bit, but it still stung like nothing I had ever felt before. I was still shivering and half afraid my legs would collapse. I could already feel my short reserves of energy draining away. As a distraction, I listened to Quatre as he began talking. The tone and sound of his voice was soothing and I found myself listening intently.

"The maganacs have a huge water tank in the ship, so we never have a problem with water. Also, they have a system that purifies it so none of it goes to waste. They do get fresh water every time they go to Russia, though. King Treize is kind enough to let them refill every time they stop. Treize is a really nice person, though he's seen as a bit of a tyrant because of how he took over Russia as it fell into disarray. But he really has done great things for that country and the people love him. You'll see him when we get to Russia and drop off the cargo. Though my family is here I live in Russia now and help in negotiations with other countries and I make sure the will of the people is heard without the corruption of the people put in power."

He continued to talk as he rinsed my skin and even as he washed my hair, since I was already too weak to do it. By the time I had finished the shower, my anxiety toward being naked in front of Quatre had faded as my fatigue had grown. Quatre had to practically carry me back to the bedroom after he had dried me off. I felt like a doll, being handled that way. Not to say I wasn't used to being pushed around and forced to go places, but no one had ever done it so gently.

I was so tired that all I could do was lie there, limp and lifeless, in the bed and try to stay awake. I was still naked and a bit damp, sprawled out on my back. I didn't even have the energy to look up at what I could hear Quatre doing across the room. Somehow, I didn't feel the need to look.

Quatre returned to the bed in a moment, sitting next to me on the side of the bed. The small jar was in his hands, the top off to reveal a smooth, white paste inside. There was a strong smell of herbs as Quatre took a generous dollop and spread it across my chest. The paste felt so good on my skin with its soothing and numbing effect. Slowly, Quatre worked the paste into my skin, gently rubbing it in small circles, careful not to press too hard.

Quatre worked the stuff into the burns on every part of my body, including my face and scalp. It was rather embarrassing, the ways I had to twist and turn for him to get at some of my burns without causing the others to start hurting again. By the time we finished I was sure that the red of my face was not from a sunburn, and was surprised to find a matching blush on Quatre's face.

The thought that a whore like me could blush at something so innocent when I had been through things far more dirty won a small laugh from me. This seemed to surprise Quatre, who looked at me with astonishment before breaking into a fit of giggles. This caused me to laugh harder and soon we were both laughing hysterically. It had been a long, long time since I had laughed and it felt so good.

It was a while after the laughter had subsided that the two of us continued to sit there in a companionable silence. I could see that Quatre was thinking about something, but couldn't bring myself to ask what. I hadn't needed to worry, though, because Quatre brought up the subject on his own.

"Trowa," he began slowly, hesitantly even, "I was wondering... if you had any place you would want to go. I mean, do you have a family?"

I shook my head, my heart coming to my throat. Quatre must have seen me still or something, because he looked at me deeply then sighed.

"Never mind. We'll talk about it when you're better," he told me, standing and walking toward the door, "Get some sleep."

And then he was gone and I was alone for the first time on the strange ship. Being alone had never affected me like it did just then and I felt that I could curl in a ball and cry.

No, I had no family of any kind. The only people I had ever known were the mercs and I would never call them a family in any way. Half the time they didn't know I was there, the other half they were using or abusing me for their own pleasure. I had constantly been on edge, waiting for someone to grab me and take me to a dark room where they would use me until I bled then leave me to fend for myself or die. Only the real Trowa had ever been kind to me. I would have been proud to call him family, but he was dead.

The only time I had ever really known true feelings of safety was when I was with Quatre on the maganacs' ship. In the short period of time I had been here I had done things that I had never even thought of doing with the mercs. I had let my guard down, I had trusted Quatre, I had grown attached to him, and I had hoped that I could stay with him in the safety of the maganacs ship. Perhaps it was a good thing that he was looking to send me away already, in a week I might be totally dependant on him. Or perhaps if I just showed them that I could be more than a burden, they would allow me to stay.

It seemed as though the light had gone off in my head. It was so obvious that I realized how stupid I was for not realizing it before. Since the moment I came to them I had been a burden, nothing but dead weight that could only use up supplies. I had to show them that I could be useful or they would probably send me back to the mercs, since no one else would keep me.

I shuddered. The last thing I wanted to do was go back to the mercs.

I realized that there was nothing I could do until later that night. For one thing, I was too tired to be of much use at that time. For another, I would probably get in someone's way or be sent back to bed. So I waited. Quatre came back at lunch time with some bread and honey, apologizing that he wasn't allowed to give me anything more substantial. The doctor came in after I had eaten and looked me over, though I didn't feel like a piece of meat as I did when the mercs looked at me. He was very professional, looking over my burns then giving me a shot for the pain, this time without the sedative though still in a most embarrassing place. Though there was no sedative in the shot I was given I immediately fell asleep once the doctor left. Quatre awakened me later to put the cream on my skin again, though I wasn't really awake enough to do more than roll over when told to. I knew I would need my strength later that night.

It was probably somewhere between midnight and two in the morning when I awoke. Quatre was sleeping peacefully beside me and I was careful not to wake him as I slipped out of bed. Somehow, there was no doubt in my mind that Quatre would force me to stay in bed.

Quietly, I donned the clothes Quatre had gotten for me, a pair of shorts and a shirt, and left the room. I had never seen the rest of the ship, so I simply walked in one direction, certain that I would come to something I could do sooner or later. Eventually, I ended up on the kitchen. I had found it while walking down a hall not too far from Quatre's room, it was the only door open. Of course, I couldn't open any of the doors for fear that I might accidentally open the door to someone's cabin and wake them.

I had to repress the urge to see what I could steal from the kitchen. It was near the time when the mercs would stop feeding me and I had always hid food on my person before so that I wouldn't be so hungry. I couldn't bring myself to steal from Quatre, though.

The counters in the kitchen were spotless; they practically shown in the light from the almost full moon. Every cupboard was perfectly arranged, even the silverware was organized. It seemed that the only thing even remotely dirty was to floor, so I found a bucket and a rag and set out to scrub it.

Back on the merc ship I wouldn't have thought twice about such a small job, but with my pain medicine rapidly wearing off and the burns on my body rubbing against the cloth of my clothes the job seemed endless. I nearly screamed when I got on my knees to clean, though only the inside half of my knees had been burnt it was agony to put my weight on them. It was only by focusing completely on my cleaning, leaving no room in my mind for the pain that I could complete the job.

It is this focus that let me miss the sounds of someone coming down the hall, otherwise I would have hidden long before the person had arrived. It was Quatre's gasp that brought me out of my trance. I looked up to see him standing in the doorway looking utterly stunned and shocked to see me on the floor like that.

"What are you doing?" Quatre asked as he came over and knelt beside me. I didn't know what to say. How to say that I was earning my keep. How to beg that he keep me. How to tell him that I had begun to trust him and I was deathly afraid of being hurt.

"I won't be a burden," I said, my voice flat despite my inner turmoil.

"What?" Quatre asked, his face taking an incredulous look.

"I won't be a burden," I repeated, "I can pull my own weight," I told him and continued to scrub the floor. Out of the corner I saw Quatre start looking a bit horrified.

"Trowa, I don't understand. You need to be in bed, not down here on the floor. Let me take you back to bed," he said, but I ignored him. Instead, I rose and dumped the little water I had used for cleaning down the drain. In the merc ship water would have never been wasted on cleaning, but I could tell the counters had been scrubbed with water so I assumed it was alright. I still felt a bit sick watching the water run down the drain.

"I'm not a waste of supplies. I can earn my keep on this ship," I told him as I refilled the bucket with water. My head was starting to feel funny, lighter than it usually did.

A look of horror came over Quatre's face and he paled visibly.

"Trowa, did you... Do you think I want you to leave?" he asked me and he looked sick at the thought. I set the bucket down on the floor slowly and faced him, my body refusing to do what I wanted it to as quickly as I was used to.

"I... won't be a burden," I told him again, my thoughts swirling too fast for me to catch. I swayed and I grabbed the counter to keep my balance. That was the last straw for Quatre.

"We'll work this out in the morning," he said, his tone final, "I'm getting you to bed."

Quickly, he bent and threw me over his shoulder, intent on carrying me to the room. My stomach lurched at the sudden movement.

"Down! Put me down!" I cried and Quatre must have heard something in my voice because he set me on the floor just a moment before I threw up.

I had skipped dinner and lunch had been long passed, so what I threw up was unrecognizable to say the least. I found myself looking at the floor I had just cleaned, now a mess, after I was finished throwing up. It was ironic, I had come down to clean and had only made things worse. I was a burden.

"I'll clean it up," I whispered desperately, reaching for the bucket. Quatre made a moaning sound beside me and a moment later I heard him padding out of the kitchen. Relief washed over me, he'd let me prove my worth.

I almost threw up a second time as I began to clean the floor, the smell so strong that I gagged. My vision blurred and for a moment I was afraid that I would fall headfirst into my own vomit, but strong hands caught me before I could. Someone put a rag, slightly damp with a strong smell on it, over my nose and mouth. I had only enough time to see Quatre's face, sad yet determined, before the darkness enveloped me.

Something cold and wet was moving across my skin, over my face and down my chest. It was hard to get my eyes open but I eventually managed it. Above me, Quatre was running a wet cloth over my body. I found myself naked and back in Quatre's room, in his bed. Quatre looked worried as he dipped the cloth in a basin of water and ran it over my neck. It was a while that we continued in that rhythm before Quatre noticed I was awake.

"What were you thinking?" he admonished quietly, "Your fever is back up and your knees are all scraped up. You're far too sick to be trying to work right now."

"I'm sorry," I apologized quietly, I hadn't meant to make Quatre angry.

"You worried me, that's all," Quatre said, the anger gone from his voice, "I woke up and you were gone, wandering around a strange ship in the dark, you could have been hurt."

"I don't want to be a burden," I told him softly. He looked at me strangely.

"Whatever gave you that idea?"

I was unsure of how to respond to him. If I told him that he did, he would be hurt, but I didn't want to lie to Quatre either. I stayed silent, in my usual fashion, and Quatre came to sit beside me.

"You're not a burden," he said finally, "you're just sick. It's alright to let yourself heal, no one minds. When you get better you can find something to do, but not before. If you keep doing things like this you could die. If I hadn't woke up you might have fainted in the kitchen and no one would have found you until morning. I want you to promise me you won't try anything like that again."

I simply sat there in silence. I couldn't promise that. I couldn't be a burden, or they'd send me back to the mercs. I just had to prove my worth. Last night Quatre had been forced to go looking for me, which was a burden to him. Tonight I would make sure Quatre didn't wake and sneak back into the room before morning. Then I wouldn't be a burden to anyone.

Quatre was looking at me sadly. I sometimes wonder if he knows what I'm thinking. There was a determination in his eyes when he reached into his sleeve and pulled out a small silver dagger. I tensed instantly but managed to keep my face blank. Quatre reached over and took my hand in his, gently turning it palm up and pricking my finger with the knife. I barely even felt the prick, though it caused blood to well up on my finger. With an intent look on his face, Quatre stuck my finger into his mouth and licked the blood away. He quickly pricked his own finger and put it to my lips, gently forcing it inside my mouth. I barely registered the coppery taste of his blood, I was so shocked. Something changed in the air or maybe in my mind. Whatever it was it was gone to quickly for me to understand what it was and I was too tired to try and figure it out.

Quatre pressed my back against the bed, pulling the sheet up to cover me then lying down beside me. Gently, he brushed my bangs out of my face and smiled at me.

"Go to sleep," he told me, and that was all it took. Sleep claimed me and I knew no more.


	25. Quatre24

Quatre POV

Trowa only managed to try to "earn his keep" one more time again during that trip. With our newly acquired bond I could tell when he was planning to try and sneak away and would stop him, even going as far as to drug him. That first night he snuck away, he was lucky Doc wasn't working late in his lab, because he would have certainly asked what I wanted the chloroform for and found out what Trowa was doing. He probably would have ordered Trowa tied down until his fever broke completely, and I didn't think that would be a good idea. After being tied in the sun like that I doubted that Trowa would be tied down willingly and forcibly restraining him would frighten him.

Over the course of the next few days Trowa continually tried to get out from under my gaze and do something that would be deemed helpful. He would do things like sneak away and fix things, everything from machinery to kitchen appliances. He would clean my room or any other room we were in while I was away. It got to the point where I had to tell him I would be extremely angry if I found him cleaning when I left the room. I had to tell him that every time I left the room, be it for thirty seconds or thirty minutes. The strain of constantly having to watch him was taking its toll on me, but I didn't really mind. I understood where Trowa had come from and knew that he wouldn't be able to adjust easily. Besides, he still slept most of the day, so it wasn't as hard as it could have been.

I also found him stashing away food. Mainly he would take buns or bread and other items that would last a while and hide them under the bed or in a drawer. I confronted him about it, gently, and told him there was no need to hide food on the ship. If he was hungry I could get him something to eat or one of the maganacs would get it for him. He couldn't give me an answer to why he was hiding the food, so I took it away. I was afraid he was going to try and run away. I felt bad about taking away something that was probably just there to make him feel better, but I couldn't take the chance that he'd disappear. I was worried that he might get off the ship, once he was outside of our link there would be no way for me to find him.

As we neared the end of the trip, Trowa became more and more determined to show us that we should keep him. I can't tell you how many time I tried to explain to him that he was not property and we weren't going to "keep" him. He could stay if he wanted or leave if he wanted, but we weren't going to force him either way.

I did manage to keep his mind off of his trouble some of the time, though. I found that Trowa had a love of music and would often take him to listen to my violin. It was also found that Trowa could play the flute, though I was a little wary of the memories it would bring. Trowa told me that the mercs had taught him to play the flute so that he would dance for them. I wasn't sure Trowa would want to play the flute after what the mercs had done to him, but he seemed to enjoy it so we played duets as often as we could. Which wasn't all that often, since Trowa was still ill and the trip from our room to the music room exhausted him. He would often doze off in the armchair and we would eat lunch in that room before attempting to make it back to our own room.

He also liked the birds Doc kept in the medical room. They were small and red, yellow, green, and blue colored. Trowa bonded with them at once and would take them out and have them sit on his finger, which was odd, because they usually didn't like people.

There was only one time on that trip that Trowa really made me mad. It was five or six days into the trip and Trowa was constantly trying to do something helpful. He finally wore himself out and fell asleep, to my delight. Keeping him from doing anything and having to physically restrain him a few times was wearing on me and I was asleep beside him in a few minutes.

I will admit, ashamed as I was about it at the time, that I had a growing attraction for Trowa. I felt bad for thinking about a person so sick in my fantasies and tried to stop myself, but, even with the burns, Trowa was so beautiful. His body was underfed, yes, but my mind put a bit more meat on his bones and removed all the redness from his skin, making him as white as those few patches of skin that hadn't been burnt. But what really haunted my dreams was his eyes. I would see them, hovering over me when I looked up, or below me when I looked down, filled with passion, all the fear that had been there washed away.

I was having what Duo would call a wet dream that night. It had been building for some time and I had done nothing about it. By the time I came awake I was half way through the orgasm and there was nothing I could do about it. I fisted my hands in the sheets and tried to stay quiet, praying that I hadn't woken Trowa.

It was the strongest orgasm I had ever felt. Wave after wave of pleasure rolled over me and I moaned as quietly as I could. When I came the pleasure seared me and I threw my head back but managed not to scream. I would have liked to lay there for a few minutes and rest, but I was so horrified by what I had done right next to Trowa that I forced myself to get up, intent on cleaning the bed and removing the evidence before Trowa could wake.

I sat up and immediately knew there was something wrong, but my foggy mind couldn't pinpoint what. Blearily I looked down to find a tousled head of brown hair hovering over my groin. My shorts were gone, and later I would find them on the floor and wonder if I put them there or he put them there, but I never asked. Trowa looked up, my softening cock slipping form his mouth, and fixed his gaze on me.

The first thing that hit me was astonishment. A sort of, "He didn't!" feeling. The next was anger. How could he think I would want him to do something like that? How could he think that I would want to use him that way? He had forced me to use him, to lower him to the level of whore.

Trowa must have sensed my anger through our link, because he whimpered and lowered his head. For some reason, that made me even madder, that he thought that I would hurt him. Even after all the time I spent with him he still didn't trust me.

I am well aware that my next actions sprang from anger and that they could have turned out very, very badly. When I think about it now I have this horrified feeling in the pit of my stomach, even though I know that I didn't hurt Trowa. I realize that, given the situation, my next actions could have done more harm than good.

I pushed Trowa back against the bed, pinning him down and crawling on top of him. I was so very luck that I had just lathered him with the numbing cream before we went to sleep, or Trowa would have been in agony. As it was, I didn't even remember that Trowa was burnt, I was so filled with anger. Trowa went limp at my hands and I could feel a deep fear and even deeper sadness coming from him.

Trowa had stopped sleeping in shorts soon after he began to recover. The shorts rubbed against his burns and caused some of the skin to come off. It didn't help me any that I was sleeping next to the naked object of my affections, but I had always managed to control myself. Looking back on this incident, I kind of wish Trowa had been wearing shorts. Maybe the extra moment would have let me calm enough to think rationally. Then again, had I not done what I did, things might have turned out even worse later, so I won't presume to mess with fate.

I held Trowa down and pried his thighs apart, not a difficult job since he would do nothing to stop me. Trowa's body tensed as I leaned down and he gasped when I took his member into my mouth. His hands came up and hovered over my head, but eventually settled for fisting themselves in the sheets. I hoped that the mercs had never done this for him, but I doubted they had. They had never seemed to care about Trowa much.

Trowa writhed beneath me, even though I know I was less than adept at what I was doing. Never in my life had I sucked anyone off and I found my first time to be a learning experience. I found that if I relaxed my throat I could take more of him, though I gagged several times in attempting it. I also found that Trowa enjoyed having his balls rubbed while I was sucking him.

It took a few minutes of suckling away on Trowa's member before he orgasmed in my mouth. I coughed and almost choked on it, but managed to swallow a bit, though I did have to catch some with my hand.

Trowa lay breathing hard on the bed. His eyes were hazed with post-orgasmic pleasure and I didn't want to bring him out of that just yet. I didn't want to face what I had done. Instead, I slipped off the bed and into the bathroom, returning with a wet rag to clean him, having already cleaned myself. Once I finished, I returned the rag to the bathroom and sat down on the side of the bed. Most of my anger had faded and, though a bit still remained, I felt bad about what I had done to Trowa. Trowa had began coming back from his haze and I wasn't sure how to deal with him. Luckily, he was the first to speak.

"W-why did you do that?" he asked, his eyes finding my face though I couldn't meet his gaze.

"I... I won't use you like that. You're not a whore, Trowa, not here and not around me. I won't take something that you're only giving out of this screwed up sense of payment. I won't take something you don't want to give. If you want to do that with me you have to want it. It has to be for both of us. If...if I have a relationship with you, it has to be about love, not lust."

We were both quiet for a moment, the silence ate away at me. Then Trowa took my hand and I looked into his eyes.

"Thank you," he told me, then leaned back and closed his eyes, asleep. I wasn't certain what to do, so I simply picked him up and put him back on his side of the bed, then curled up beside him and went to sleep.

The next day, neither of us mentioned what had happened. In a way I was a little disappointed. I wanted Trowa to be angry at me for what I had done, but he wasn't. I suppose it was a good thing I reacted the way I did and that he decided to offer himself to me first. Had he given himself to one of the maganacs like that... they're good people, but one can only take so much. I'm fairly sure that a few of them would have taken him up on his offer, not thinking that he really didn't want to have sex with them. They wouldn't have forced him, but they might not have hesitated to take what was freely given.

It was soon found that we would be a day late to Haven. In my anxiety over the trip I had completely forgotten that there would be a full moon during our trip. Full moons drove the monsters wild. It caused werewolves to become unstable and shift forms uncontrollably, but it also sent ogres and giants into feeding frenzies and caused all sorts of nocturnal creatures to come out. It wasn't safe to move around during a full moon so the maganacs would put the ship into lock-down. The engines would be shut down, the ship grounded, and all doors locked. The hull of the ship was almost a foot thick, there was no way in from the outside.

We set the ship down at dusk in a forest on the border of Russia. It was a shame that we would have to be late a full day when we were only a day away from Haven, but there was nothing we could do. When the full moon rose until it rose the next night all the creatures were under its control, it just wasn't safe to fly or go outside.

From the time Trowa first attempted to help to when we set down for the full moon on the next night, I stopped Trowa from going out a total of eight times. I had to drug him a few of the times he planned to leave when I was out of the room. One wouldn't think that a boy who could barely walk would cause so much trouble, but I was careful not to let my annoyance show. Trowa was so timid and uncertain about everything, anything I said could cause him to panic. Oddly, though, he seemed a little agitated when we set down for the night, we paced the room and was constantly looking to get away. A few times I had to follow our link and track him down only to find him hidden in a closet or some other small space. It was like he was afraid of something. I tried to make him understand that he was safe, but I don't think I got threw to him.

It also irked me that, though we were now linked in the mind, I could feel that he was still keeping something from me. His emotions would go into turmoil when he thought about it, but he never gave a clue as to what it was. It preyed upon my mind as I wondered what his secret could be.

I think I knew something was going to happen that night, even though I didn't know what. Trowa was in and agitated state, his eyes darting around the room nervously. He had been like that for some time and none of my consoling seemed to help. I was starting to think about giving him a sedative, when a wolf howled in the distance and all hell broke loose. Trowa jumped out of his seat, the chair by the bed, and dashed across the room. I tried to grab him, but he knocked me out of the way and ran out the door. Fear radiated off of him as I chased him down the halls.

Night was falling and, though most of the of the maganacs had settled in for an extra long sleep, some were still about. It was inevitable that Trowa would run into someone, racing around the halls like that. I didn't even get to see the man that Trowa pushed out of his way as we raced down the hall, we were moving so fast. Surely Trowa would tire soon and I would be able to catch him, I was amazed he made it so far in his weakened condition.

"Master Quatre!" the man called as I raced down the halls in hot pursuit of Trowa.

"Go get Rasid and Doc!" I yelled over my shoulder, not daring to stop. I was almost out of breath and Trowa was almost out of the ship. There was no where for him to run to unless...

My fear was confirmed as Trowa twisted the locks and threw open the door and raced outside. The locks were made to keep monsters out, not people in. It was suicide to run outside at night with no protection under a full moon.

I didn't hesitate to follow him. The only logical explanation of Trowa's behavior I could think of was that his fever was back up and affecting his thinking. He was my responsibility, I had to get him back to the ship safely or I'd never forgive myself.

The night was foggy and dim. After chasing him a few yards I lost sight of Trowa in the fog and slowed, having no idea where to go. I couldn't even make my way back to the ship for help because I didn't know where I had come from.

"Trowa!" I yelled, hoping he'd hear and come back. "Trowa!" I called again. There was the snap of a twig to my right and I turned that way, though I couldn't see anything.

"Trowa?" I called quietly. The only reply was a sharp growl and I barely had time to jump and fly into a tree before a large, beast jumped at me. From the tree I could see a vaguely furry, apelike creature on the ground. In a second the beast turned and jumped at me. I leaped at another tree but the beast was faster and sank its teeth into my ankle, dragging me to the ground as I reached for a branch of the tree.

We both hit the ground and the beast attacked me with startling force. It tried to bite at my neck, I managed to kick it and it only tore my shoulder. I hit it with my fist as hard as I could but the beast ignored it, like nothing happened. I tried to scratch its eyes with my nails, but only managed to make it mad. It pinned my hands above my head and went to bite my throat out. There was nothing I could do to stop it from killing me.

There was a flash of grey to my left and the beast was suddenly gone from on top of me. I scrambled to my feet and backed away from the fighting pair. My rescuer was a huge grey wolf, as I watched him terrorize the beast his deep green eyes met mine and I could sense something familiar about it.

The wolf made swift work of the beast, tearing its throat out in a gruesome manner, the same manner it had attempted to tear out mine. Not to say that the beast didn't get any hits in. By the end of the fight the wolf was bleeding from a large bite in its back leg and had a large tear above its shoulder. It began to limp away, but was too injured and fell down. Despite my fear, I rushed over and knelt beside it. Quickly assessing its injuries, I tore up my shirt to staunch the bleeding from the wounds. Before I could think of a way to get us both back to safety, while finding Trowa and convincing the maganacs to allow a huge wolf into their ship, the wolf changed.

Its skin shimmered and became liquid-like. Its body shifted, convulsed, and stretched, slipping into a different shape and solidified. On the ground, naked and bleeding, was Trowa. He looked at me, raising his head from where he lie on his stomach, his deep green eyes boring into me but showing only hopeless despair. I could feel nothing but pain coming from him and it overwhelmed me for a moment so that I could only stand there and stare at him. When I finally managed to regain my senses, Trowa had looked away, returning his head to the ground. He lay there without a care for his own welfare. It was heartbreaking; he really thought, after everything we had been through, that I would leave him.

I approached him quietly and knelt beside him then quickly redid the bandages that had fallen off as he had shifted shape. Trowa's eyes looked at me with disbelief, but inside him I could feel the slightest glimmer of hope come through the pain. I gently helped Trowa sit up, then to stand, though he had to lean on me heavily.

"Trowa," I said softly, "Do you know the way back to the ship?"

There was a slight hesitation, then he pointed and we began to walk toward the ship. The whole night seemed unreal to me at the time, like a bad dream. In some part of my mind I was elated that I had finally found Trowa's secret, but another realized the implications of the fact that Trowa was a werewolf, beasts that were known for temporary insanity and instability. Still, somehow I couldn't bring myself to fear Trowa.

By the time we reached the ship, Trowa had changed to a wolf an back again twice. He had become so weak that I had to carry him and he was losing blood rapidly. As I walked I could see the ship come into view. Apparently, so could Trowa, because he started squirming in my arms and I had to put him down.

"What's wrong?" I asked him.

"I can't go with you."

"Why not?" I asked, but Trowa merely looked away, unable to meet my eyes. I could feel the fear inside him and tried to quiet it some, as I had done on other occasions, but it was too strong for me to stop without announcing my presence. I decided that now was not the time to alert Trowa to my presence in his mind. Of course, it was easy to tell what Trowa was afraid of, so I tried to allay his fears verbally.

"Trowa, you know the maganacs won't hurt you. I-I'm not sure how they'll react, but they aren't going to hurt you and you can't stay here anyway. You'll be killed, you couldn't fight those beasts in this condition. I won't leave you."

"Quatre," Trowa whispered, leaning his head on my shoulder as I knelt beside him, "I'm hungry."

It took me a moment to realize what he had said, but when I did it froze me on the spot. Hungry werewolves would eat anything and everything near them, from livestock to humans. Though they would eat plants, they craved flesh. It was not unheard of for a werewolf to consume his entire village during the full moon.

With these pictures flashing in my head, it was almost comical that Trowa would simply sit there and nuzzle my should placidly. But I knew I had to get Trowa back to the ship. A werewolf starved through the full moon, though only one day of fasting would actually occur, could become weak and die.

"There's food back at the ship," I told him softly. It took a minute, but there was a small nod against my shoulder, Trowa's permission to take him back. Feeling greatly relieved, I lifted him and started toward the ship. I had only taken a few steps when I heard a commotion and found the maganacs preparing to come after me. One of them called my name and I answered back.


	26. Quatre25

Quatre POV

To say that I was worried about how the maganacs would react to Trowa would be a vast understatement. I knew that they wouldn't hurt him, but they wouldn't want to let him run loose, either.

Rasid came rushing up to us and Trowa sank down in my arms. Trowa's always been a bit afraid of Rasid, probably because of his size.

"Master Quatre, what happened? Is he alright?" Rasid asked, nearing the both of us to have a better look at Trowa. That's when I felt it. Trowa shivered and his skin shimmered and conformed in my arms. In a second, I was holding a large wolf. Rasid gasped and backed away.

"Master Quatre, get back!" he yelled.

"Rasid! Rasid calm down!" I yelled back even as the other maganacs surrounded us, weapons drawn. "Trowa's not going to hurt anyone. He's hurt, we have to get him inside."

Trowa shivered and became human again. There was an overwhelming sadness and fear coming from him, in both human and wolf form, but I had to block it out. Having me in a panic would have done nothing to help Trowa.

"Master Quatre, he's a werewolf! Get back!"

"Enough!" I yelled, fed up with their yelling. Ignoring the cries of the maganacs, I marched toward the ship.

In an instant, Trowa was pulled form my arms. There was a sharp feeling of panic from him before I could block it out. I turned around to find Rasid holding Trowa in his grasp as Trowa struggled helplessly.

"If he's on the ship, he stays in the prison. I won't have him hurt my crew," Rasid told me, his tone firm. Before I could answer he had pushed his way past me and the other gawking maganacs and into the ship.

It was a moment before I regained my senses and followed. Rasid had a head start, so he had Trowa in the prison hall before I got to them. I watched as Trowa struggled as they put him into the small, metal room and hooked a makeshift chain collar around his neck so he couldn't get away. The collar had a pad lock so that he couldn't get it off even in his human form. It was when he heard the snap of the lock that he went wild.

He pulled at the chain and screamed so loud it reverberated off the walls and down the hall. I could see the tears tracking down his face as he screamed my name. His eyes found me only as they shut the door and locked him inside. Everything went silent.

The pain was so great that I almost fainted and I had to sit down for a moment. When I came back to my senses, most of the maganacs had gathered in the room. I set to work at once.

"Abu, Abdul, go see if the cook has any meat cooking for tonight and bring it here. Arif, run and get some blankets from my room, then stop and ask Doc to bring some medical supplies down. Rasid," I said, turning and addressing him directly, "I can't make you let Trowa go, but I won't leave him alone in that room. I want to be allowed in the room and I want the key to that lock."

He looked at me for a long time after that. Both he and I knew that I wasn't asking, nor would I accept denial.

"When you are in that room, there will be no way for us to help you. We won't be able to see nor hear you. If the werewolf kills you, we can do nothing. If you choose to remove the collar, the outside door will be locked first and it will not be opened again until after the full moon," he told me. I nodded, I understood his reasons and accepted his terms.

"Be careful, master Quatre," he told me, then turned away.

Arif came running down the hall a second later, his arms piled high with blankets and Doc trailing after him. Rasid opened the door and Trowa's screams were once again audible. I made my way into the room, Doc trailing at my heels and Arif following hesitantly.

Trowa was curled up in a ball on the floor, screaming and sobbing brokenly. I rushed to his side, Doc and Arif waited by the door.

I knelt beside him and, unsure of what else to do, ran my fingers though his hair in a calming gesture. Trowa looked up, his beautiful eyes rimmed by tears, and just looked at me for a second, like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. Then he grabbed me and pulled me forward, burying his face in my chest. Arif made a move toward us, but I raised my hand in a gesture for him to stop.

"...thought you left me. I thought you wouldn't come back," Trowa whispered into my chest.

"I told you I wouldn't leave," I whispered in his ear and he gave me the first true smile I had seen of his. He was so gorgeous.

"Master Quatre," Doc interrupted, attempting to get my attention. I looked toward him and felt more than saw Trowa curl himself around me, afraid we would be separate again.

"He's hurt," I told Doc, "He has a long cut on the side of his leg and a smaller one on his shoulder."

Doc quickly came over and knelt beside us. I had to force Trowa to uncurl so that Doc could see his wounds and ended up with Trowa's arms wrapped securely around my waist, his head pillowed in my lap as he lay on his back. It didn't take long for us to see that Trowa's leg had already stopped bleeding and Doc made quick work of stitching Trowa's leg. We then had to twist Trowa around so that we could see his shoulder, which had also stopped bleeding and was not in need of stitches.

"All in all, he's not too bad off," pronounced Doc while packing up his things, "The stitches I put in are loose enough that he should be able to transform without messing them up as long as he doesn't move around much. I doubt Rasid will let me back in to see him, so make sure you bring him down for a check-up after the full moon is over," Doc told me. Trowa was again curled up on my lap and could have cared less what Doc was saying. He was contented to just sit there in my lap quietly.

That is, until he smelled food. It was odd, the almost wolf-like way he reacted. He sniffed a bit, then stood up and walked as far as the chain would allow. A moment later, Abu and Abdul entered carrying two turkeys and two large baskets on either arm. Trowa pulled on the chain as hard as he could while making growling noises, but otherwise ignored everyone else. Abu and Abdul put their burdens on the floor and made a hasty exit, Arif followed suit, placing the blankets in a corner. Doc nodded to me, then also left the room. I walked up to the door where Rasid was waiting, the key in his hand.

"Be safe," he told me, handing me the key, then shut the door. There was the click of a lock and I knew that, for better or worse, I was locked inside.

It was dark with the door closed, our only light coming from the small window in the cell. The moon shown brightly through it.

Trowa was making wheezing noises, almost choking himself trying to get at the food. I hurried over to him, a little anxious, but he ignored me even as I undid the lock on his collar. When he was free, he leaped at the meat, devouring it with a vivacious appetite. Watching him, I felt a bit nauseous, so I busied myself with spreading the blankets out in the corner. I was glad Arif had brought so many, the floor was hard and the night was cold, not to mention the barred window let in an icy draft.

When I looked back at Trowa he had transformed into a wolf again, but somehow that made me nervous, being trapped with what appeared to be a wild animal, so I checked what the cook had packed us in the basket and was delighted to find everything from sweet rolls to apples to a large supply of beef jerky. There was also apple juice, a personal favorite of mine, and sweet water in the basket, along with napkins and forks and other such utensils. I smiled, it was just like cook to pack a picnic lunch for a prison cell.

I returned to the corner and sat down on the blankets, cocooning myself in them, my back against the wall. Trowa had finished off the first turkey and seemed to be eating the second a bit more slowly. In a few minutes, he changed back and it was not long after that when he lost interest in the food and crawled over to me, his belly full and bulging, like a wolf after it had gorged itself. He smiled at me, a sated, sloe-eyed smile. I pushed aside the blankets and opened my arms for him and he quickly crawled into my arms and fell asleep. His face was dirty with grease, so I wiped it clean with the edge of the blanket, not worried about it because the floor was dirty and all the blankets would need washed anyway.

Trowa slept until the moon had sunk beyond our window. I dozed a bit, but couldn't really bring myself to sleep with all that had just happened. The recent events played through my mind over and over again while I tried to make sense of it. I was so deep in thought that I didn't even notice Trowa's eyes had opened until he nuzzled my arm.

"Hey," I called, seeing that he was awake.

"Hey," he replied, softly, "I'm sorry I fell asleep on you like that."

"It's alright. I know the full moon has to be affecting you. You should go back to sleep if you need to."

Trowa shook his head mutely, staring intently at the moon.

"Thank you," Trowa said after a while of silence.

"For what?"

"For... everything."

"It wasn't much," I told him, knowing how little I had actually been able to give him. He looked me in the eye for a moment, some emotion I wasn't able to properly feel because of the barriers I hadn't yet taken down was shown there.

"Yes, it was," Trowa said, again quietly but this time with conviction. I thought that ended the conversation, but Trowa felt the need to go on even though it pained him.

"No one's every stayed with me when the moon was up. The mercenaries would always lock me in a room with no light and leave me there until after the full moon. Sometimes they forgot about me and three or four days would go by before they'd let me out. I was so hungry..."

"They didn't feed you?" I asked. Trowa simply shook his head. Well, that explained why he was so thin and weak.

"The mercs wanted to keep me weak," Trowa continued, "like some kind of pet. T-they liked that they had a monster in their grasp to do whatever they wanted with. They wanted to keep me helpless. Trowa... the real Trowa was a mercenary. He was kind to me and named me after himself, he treated me like a person and didn't hurt me like the others did. He... he never knew I was a... a werewolf. I was afraid to tell him and then he died. I always wondered if he would have hated me for being what I am."

We were silent for a long time after that. A breeze came down from the window as the night wore on and I shivered, pulling Trowa closer.

"Are you warm enough?" I asked. Trowa only nodded. I sighed, there was only two days left in our journey and I still hadn't asked Trowa to stay with me. I thought that at least here he couldn't run away.

"Trowa, I've been meaning to ask you, what do you think about... not staying with the maganacs?" Trowa froze and I could feel his heart beat faster. "Calm down," I soothed, realizing how my nervousness had made that sound, "What I mean is... I..." Trowa was looking at me curiously, so I took a deep breath and prepared myself, "Trowa, will you come and stay with me at Haven?" I asked him. True to form, Trowa deliberated over his answer for a moment before speaking.

"You mean you don't stay with the magancs?" he asked.

"No. My home is in Haven, I just travel with the maganacs when I need to."

"I would like to stay with you, but..." he hesitated, "what about my..."

"It won't be easy bringing a werewolf to the capitol of Russia, but I'm sure we can manage. Haven is surrounded by deep forests that you can hunt in. You... you don't have to stay or even come with me, but I'd like to try."

It was a long time before Trowa answered, and even then he only nodded, but I was so delighted. I smiled and stroked his hair before we both fell asleep.

We both slept for a long time that night. When I awoke I was no longer sitting against the wall and, as I looked around, I had been moved to the other side of the room.

"You didn't look comfortable," Trowa told me, coming to sit beside me and handing me a glass full of apple juice, "and the window had a bad draft, so I moved you over here."

"Thank you."

I looked out the window and found that the sun was high in the sky, though it was still cool in the room because of all the trees shading us. I decided it must have been a little later than noon.

"When will they let us out?" Trowa asked.

"Probably after the moon rises tonight. Not long."

Trowa seemed uneasy. He rose and paced the room a bit, I had to call him to sit down for fear that he would break his stitches. He kept looking at me, but with the barrier between us still up I couldn't tell what he was feeling. I would have pulled the barrier down, but I was afraid that Trowa might feel it, so I simply waited. When he finally did approach me, I could tell from his movements that he was nervous.

"Quatre, that night, when we... when I..."

"Go on," I told him, knowing which night he meant and realizing how embarrassing it must be to try and talk about it. He meant on the night that we sucked each other off, but I could see why he couldn't say it.

"D-did you mean what you said? That you'd have to love me to have a relationship with me?"

"Y-yes."

"Could we? H-have a relationship, I mean. I-I..."

"Do you love me?"

"I think so..."

"You don't know?"

"I-I've never been in love before. I don't know if this is love but... but I panic every time I think about you leaving me and I'm not afraid to let you touch me. That night... the night when I took you in my mouth, I heard you making all those noises and it made me hard. I started thinking about how it could be with you. I started thinking it might not be so bad to do that... if it was with you. When I took you like that, I wanted to prove myself wrong. I was so afraid that I'd be disappointed, that I wanted you to hurt me so that I wouldn't hope for anything. I wanted you to hurt me... but you didn't. You took me in your mouth, the same as I did to you, and we were equals. No one's ever done that for me before. I-I don't know what love is... but I'd like to find out. Show me?"

"I've never been in love either, so maybe we can show each other. No matter what happens, I'll always be here for you, even if this doesn't work out. But I think it will. I think I love you. No, I know I love you. Will you let me give you something?"

Trowa looked a bit wary and a bit curious when he nodded. I leaned in and gently brushed out lips together. For a moment, I stayed like that, with my lips on Trowa's, allowing him to get used to the feel of it. Then I deepened the kiss, pushing our lips together more forcefully and really kissing him. He jumped a bit when I stuck my tongue out, but opened his mouth and gave me entrance, then explored my mouth in turn. Trowa's hands slipped under my shirt as the kiss went on. I could feel his hardened member pressed against my thigh, only a thin blanket between his naked body and my clothed one.

It was the hardest thing for me to do, when I broke our kiss and pulled Trowa's hand away from my chest. I would have liked nothing more than to have him writhing beneath me on the floor, but I realized that it was neither the time nor the place to try to deepen our relationship. For one thing, it would be most inopportune if I should happen to be inside Trowa or the reverse when he transformed. For another, Trowa simply had too many bad memories of sex, I would not add any more. When we made love, it would be somewhere we both felt safe at a time that we could take as long as we wanted.

Trowa looked at me with confusion and a little bit of hurt in his eyes when I pulled away from him.

"Don't you want to have sex with me?" he asked in a pained voice.

"I want to make love to you, but not here or now. I want to have you all to myself when we don't have to rush. Besides, we don't have anything to make the process easier. You know I couldn't hurt you."

"I don't understand. I thought it always hurts," he told me, confusion on his face. I had to frown at that comment.

"If you thought it always hurt why did you want to do it with me?" I asked. Trowa blushed.

"I-I wanted to be closer to you. To be... joined, I guess. It doesn't hurt too much anymore..."

"It shouldn't hurt at all. If you do it right there shouldn't be any pain involved. And it never hurts if two people love each other. I won't hurt you at all, not now, not ever. I know it's going to take some time for you to understand that, but please try. When we get to Haven, I'll show you how to do it without pain. We'll take it slow and if you don't like something we can stop. Maybe... maybe you should take me our first time."

"What?"

"You should take me. You already know what hurts and I can walk you through the preparations..."

"You would let me take you?" he said his voice full of wonder. I suppose he hadn't thought about that aspect yet.

"Of course. I've told you before, we're equals. Partners. If I plan to do something to you it will only be something you'd enjoy. In the same way it will probably be something I'd be willing to try myself."

I think that this time, it really sank in to Trowa that I didn't want to own him, or use him, or get anything from him. That we really were equal. There were unshed tears in his eyes when he looked at me, and he gently reached up and pulled me over for a long sweet kiss. He sighed when we parted, closed his eyes, and curled up in my lap.

We both dozed after that, but only for a few hours. Again there was something preying on my mind and I felt that if I didn't get it out I'd keep putting it off until it was too late. When Trowa woke I decided I would tell him about our link. He woke all too soon for my taste.

"Trowa," I called gently, "I have to tell you something, but I don't want you to get mad at me."

"I could never get mad at you."

"Of course you could. We're partners, remember? You can get mad whenever you want, yell, scream, um... don't throw things, but you can yell as loud as you want." This comment brought a smile from Trowa.

"So what do you need to tell me?"

"Do you know what a mind link is?"

"No."

"Well, I linked with your mind."

"Alright."

"No, Trowa, you need to understand. I linked my mind to yours. I can feel what you're feeling and you can feel what I'm feeling."

"I haven't felt what you're feeling before."

"Yes, you have, I was just discrete because I was worried about how you'd react and I didn't want you to know."

"Oh. So you can feel whatever I feel and I can do the same?"

"Exactly."

"Okay."

"Trowa, you're not taking this seriously. I can see inside your mind."

"I trust you, Quatre. You've obviously been able to do this for a while now and you haven't used it against me. The only reason I ever hid my emotions before was because the mercs would have used them against me and now I can't seem to help it. I'm glad you can tell what I'm feeling even though I can't show it. I love you and I trust you and you wouldn't have linked with me if you didn't feel the same, right?"

"R-right. I just, I just wanted to know if you'd like to have our link upgraded when we get to Haven. It will allow us to read each other's minds and share memories, but we need a psychic there to make sure nothing goes wrong. Would you like to?"

"Sure," Trowa said, curling up in my arms again and dozing back off. I felt a bit silly about how much I had worried myself over what had turned out to be nothing. But after the way Heero reacted to finding Duo in his mind I couldn't help but worry.

I also realized that Trowa didn't completely understand the link yet either, but I was certain that he knew enough to decide that he wanted to link with me. The rest I could explain when we were back at Haven. Carefully, while Trowa dozed, I brought the wall down so that we were fully linked again. There was no pain this time, only hope and love.

It was so peaceful in that cell, with Trowa sleeping on my chest. Nothing else seemed to matter at that moment and, for once, it just felt like everything would work out for the best.


	27. Treize26

Treize POV

The formal gardens of the Chinese were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. It was almost, or perhaps because of, magic that they even grew in a place that was so cold most of the year. Of course the monks tended them like they were children, but it still seemed a bit cold for flowers.

The ruler of the Lin dynasty was a man by the name of Lizong. He and I were on peaceful terms, but we seemed to annoy one another. Lizong was close to my age and had come to power only a few years before my conquest of Russia.

The palace where we met was not the royal palace, nor was it in the capitol city. Instead, it was a sort of summer getaway at the bottom of the Himalayan mountains. A cold wind blew down the mountains and kept the temperature from warm to chilly and an air current from the Indian Ocean brought heavy if not frequent storms.

All the dragons had been relocated from the nest that the dragon had been stolen from, so this was not the original home of the dragon. It was, however, easily able to care for her and had several other dragons staying there. When we arrived I was in all my kingly finery, clothes that looked magnificent but would have hindered me in a fight. Returning the dragon to the emperor, since all the dragons were considered possessions of the emperor, turned into quite a spectacle. I wasn't surprised, the Chinese were very fond of rituals.

Instead of simply taking the dragon to her nest, the emperor met my ships at the entrance of the city. Together, we boarded splendidly decorated coaches and were seated high on a platform so everyone could see. In my own country, I would have pointed out that this made both of us an easy target for archers or aerial creatures, but I didn't doubt that I would be safe by the side of the emperor in his own country. It is hard to match the loyalty of the Chinese people to their emperor.

The dragon was also put onto a large, wheeled platform covered in sweet-smelling flowers. I was appalled to see that, unlike our carriage which was drawn by horses, the dragon's platform was pulled by no less than a hundred men, all done up in a kind of uniform.

I was appalled, but knew enough to keep my mouth shut. There was nothing I could do, not with my country so new and this country so strong. I had no doubt that those men were there of their own free will, no matter how grudgingly that will was given.

The monks all lined up in front of the nest, awaiting the arrival of the dragon. When the time came for her to pass into the hands of the monks, Lizong made a long, inspiring speech about the friendship and loyalty Russia had shown the Chinese people and the cowardice and evil of the people that had stolen the dragon. It was a good speech, but far too long and in depth. I found it a bit boring, though the crowd was riveted. Though I suppose that's not saying much, in China one can be beheaded for not listening to the emperor.

There was a huge Chinese style party that night and it was late before I could go to bed. I was tired from the trip and the music, though beautiful, had given me a headache. Not to mention that many of the girls had wanted to dance with me, apparently very aware that I was still unmarried. Lizong and I would talk about political matters later, after I had been shown a good time and rested a bit.

"This is a time for celebration," he told me, "we will talk later."

And so the emperor said it, and so it would be done. Lizong was not spoiled more than any rich monarch was, but he was so used to his every will and whim being adhered to that he had trouble realizing when other's needs should come first. His advisors tried to keep him away from most other leaders, realizing that one day his stubborn need for everything to be done his way would insult one of the other monarchs. It was only my easy going nature that allowed me to speak with him directly.

Lizong had many advisors, most of them appointed by his father, and each advisor was extremely loyal to their emperor, but they did not close their eyes to his faults. They were all very wise men, but also very worldly men. I knew well that someone could be smart to books but stupid to the affairs of the people. The former emperor had chosen well and I had the strange feeling that I would have gotten along well with him.

The newer advisors did not hold much respect in my eyes. There were only three of them, but they seemed to constantly have the emperor's ear. They went by the names of Que, Noventa, and So. I wasn't too sure how Noventa became one of the emperor's advisors, since he was obviously foreign and the emperor didn't usually trust foreigners. There was also something disturbing about Noventa. Something that just wasn't right about him.

I took my leave from the party when I felt that I could no longer hold my head up. Lizong bid me good night, grinning at me and telling me not to stay up too late. Tired and startled, I asked him if he had sent another woman to my room. He laughed and shook his head. I was so relieved I headed off to bed, not bothering to ask what he had meant by that comment.

I found that I was staying in the same room I had on my last trip. A beautiful wooden bed, I was unfamiliar with the type of wood, stood in the corner on the far side of the rom, then a small table, bookshelf, armchair, and chest of drawers. When I put it like that, the room doesn't seem very marvelous, but I cannot possibly describe all the beautiful paintings, tapestries, and designs of the room. Everything from the walls to the legs of the dresser was decorated with Chinese symbols and pictures. A pair of Chinese swords decorated with a red and blue dragon hung above the bed. It is safe to say, though, that the room was dominated by the colors black and red and sometimes inlaid with gold.

It was simply breathtaking, but I was in no mood to marvel it tonight. I was exhausted and only wanted to climb into bed and sleep for the rest of the trip. However, when I opened the door and stepped into my room, there was someone already in my bed.

The boy was only a teen and looked about the same age as Duo and Quatre. He was tied to my bed, completely naked, in a provocative position. There were four silk ropes tied to the posts at the head of the bed and two tied at the foot. Two of the silk ropes from the head came down and tied at the wrists, holding his arms above his head. Two more from the head came down and tied at the boy's knees, pulling them up and revealing everything. The two that came from the bottom of the bed tied around the boy's ankles, making it impossible for him to kick or move around.

The boy's eyes were the deep chocolate color common throughout China, but they were deeply glazed in a drug-induced haze. The boy's eyes fell on me but he didn't seem to see me. He was groggy and disoriented and seemed to have trouble moving his head to look around the room, as though watching for something. Or someone. Around his neck there was another, thicker piece of silk. I had no doubt that this one was intended to be used as a gag if the boy got too noisy.

I was just to the point of wondering what kind of sick, twisted individual would use a person when the emperor's strange comments came back to me. And what I had said on my last trip...

I told them I was gay.

I told them I was _gay!_

_I TOLD THEM I WAS GAY!_

It would have utterly ruined my image as a solid commander who never faltered and always knew what to do if someone had come in and found me beating my head against a wall, but I did it anyway. I did it until even my headache had to flee along with the rest of my senses.

I turned back to the boy on the bed. In all my years, I have never seen anything so beautiful. His skin was bronze and shining in the dim light. Beyond him a large window streamed moonlight over his body and silhouetted him by the stars. His lips were pink and perfectly shaped, parted and panting a bit. As I watched, his tongue peaked out and laid a bit of moisture on them, giving them a glossy shine. His hair cascaded around his shoulders like raven wings. His body was also nothing to scoff at, with a perfect physic that only hours of training with a sword would grant. As if adding proof to my assumption, there was a small, fading scar on the right side of his stomach, the kind often made in a duel.

I forced myself to look away from the boy, my honor would not allow me to take him in his current condition. Quickly, I fished a knife out from under my shirt and cut the boy's bonds. He fell back to the bed, his eyes glued to me in astonishment and fear. Like he couldn't understand how I had snuck up on him.

Quickly I took the boy's wrist and checked his pulse. The boy tried to resist me, but the drug had made him drowsy and weak, so his attempts were feeble at most. I was relieved, though not surprised, to find the boy's pulse normal. Chinese doctors were amongst the best in the world and had dealt with drug and herbal medicines for thousands of years. I was confident that Lizong's doctors would have been careful with the boy, as he was to be, I assumed, another gift to me. I would have to try and return him to his family, as I had the last one. However, it would be trickier, since I could not use my preferences as an excuse. Perhaps that little scar of his could be used...

I was brought back to my senses as the boy moaned loudly and attempted to sit up. Quickly, I pulled him into a sitting position and held onto him, as he was unsteady. The boy moaned loudly again.

"Boy," I called gently but sternly, "Can you hear me? What is your name?"

"Chang... Chang Wufei," he told me, faltering a bit with the words. He moaned again and started to pant.

"Wufei, are you in pain? What hurts?"

The boy only shook his head and bit his lip, closing his eyes and leaning against my shoulder. He was sweating a bit and seemed to be in a lot of pain.

Abruptly, I wondered if the boy had been prepared for me and if anything had been left inside him. That would explain his reluctancy to tell me of his pain.

"Wufei, did they prepare you for me? Wufei?" I asked, trying to call him back.

"Yes..."

"How?"

"Put things... Pulled... Pushed... Had to stretch..."

"Did they leave them?"

"Things... hurt...won't!" he said, suddenly pushing away from me, his eyes wide with terror and anger, "Won't! I won't be his! I'll die first! I won't lose my honor! I won't! I... won't..." he said, then faded back into the haze, gradually going lax and leaning back against the bed. I decided then that the boy's information really couldn't be trusted at this stage.

I pressed him back against the bed and lifted his legs up. I would have to make sure they hadn't left anything painful inside of him. The boy gasped and tried to push me away.

"No! No don't! I won't! I won't... let...you," he sobbed, violently struggling to push me away. His body was coiled like a spring, which would have made it impossible for me to get where I need to without hurting him. I quickly sat him back up. He quieted immediately and it seemed as though he had associated lying down with being taken in his haze of drugs. My mind moved quickly, but I could find only one other option.

Scooping the boy in my arms, I grabbed a bottle of lotion from the small, adjoining bathroom and sat down in the armchair, the boy spread across my lap. Slowly, as not to alert him to my intentions, I placed his feet on the dresser, so that his legs were raised and spread. Quickly, I spread the lotion on my fingers and snaked my arm underneath him, holding his upper body with the other arm. I knew I would have to distract him from what I was doing if I didn't want him tense.

"So, Wufei, how did you get here?" I asked, moving my hand closer to its target. Wufei turned and looked at me strangely.

"By horse," he said, misunderstanding the question.

"No, I mean, how did you land yourself in this position?" I asked, my hand gently tracing the cleft of his ass.

"You picked me up and put me here," he told me, again not understanding. I laughed softly and used the motion of my body to cover the feeling of peeling apart his buttox and pressing two fingers in.

"I mean, why did the emperor give you to me?" I asked, gently feeling around for his entrance. His face went solemn, even sad.

"I was accused of a crime," told me softly and I had to pause in my endeavor.

"What crime?" I asked.

"Sorcery," he told me shame-faced and I almost sighed in relief. I was worried it had been something horrible, like murder. Though in this country sorcery might have been considered worse than murder, it was also easily the most widely used accusation without proof. It was unlikely the boy had even seen real sorcery, let alone used it. Still, while my fingers found his tight, pre-oiled pucker, I had to ask him about it.

"So," I questioned easily, "Do you practice sorcery?"

I was surprised by the vehemence of the response I got. The boy's face went red with anger and clenched his body, his bottom squeezing my hand almost painfully tight, and arched away from me.

"I've never practiced sorcery!" he cried, "I tried to ignore it!" he almost shouted, then instantly calmed again as the drugs drained away what little strength he had. It wasn't until a few moments later that the boy realized what he had inadvertently told me and he moaned in fear and shame.

"So," I asked him, "You can do sorcery?"

The boy bit his lip, then nodded, tears pooling at the corner of his eyes, but I could see that his pride would not let them fall.

"Sometimes... my candles would light on their own or a cup I had been stirring would keep stirring even after I let go. I-I tried to make it stop, but I couldn't... And then Merian..." The boy barely repressed a sob and hid his face in my chest. I had been gently working two fingers inside him and was up to the second knuckle. His body relaxed for a second and, unsure of how long the drugs would last and deciding I couldn't distract him much longer, I quickly pressed my fingers inside of him as far as they would go, thankfully finding nothing there. Wufei jumped, startled, his face going pale, but I pulled my fingers out before he could try to remove them. His face went red with anger and I could see that he was about to yell at me in a fit of temper, but the drugs suddenly hit him and he collapsed against me again, unable to even hold himself up. The boy whimpered and writhed against me and I was at a loss for what could be hurting him. I now knew there was nothing inside him so I quickly scanned his body for external wounds. That was when I found the source of the problem between Wufei's legs.

The boy was sporting an impressive erection, one that could be called painful, and a cockring around his dripping manhood that allowed him to do nothing about it. Quickly, I removed the small band, dropping it on the floor and immediately taking my hand away from his privates. Wufei looked up at me in shock as the blood went rushing down to his already swelled member and he whimpered in pain. Then lust took hold of him and he reached down, unmindful of my presence, to stroke himself.

I knew that I should not allow the boy to touch himself so close to me, but there was nothing I could do. No matter how many times I told my body to move, it refused to obey. It didn't help any that I had been sporting an erection since I walked in the room and having the boy naked on my lap hadn't helped any.

There must have been an aphrodisiac in the drugs the boy had been given, because he was not even aware of my presence as he stroked himself to completion on my lap. Roughly, he stroked up and down his own length, moaning and thrashing his head from side to side. His body on my lap rubbed against my own hard flesh in a tantalizing but not completing way and I found myself gripping the arms of the chair to keep my hands from reaching down my own pants. Finally, arching his back and crying out, he came, spewing milky white seed across his own naked flesh and my clothing. Watching him orgasm like that, I could not seem to help myself and blushed as I came inside my pants.

The boy's climax was so hard that I wasn't surprised to see him collapse afterwards, somewhere between post-orgasmic bliss and utter exhaustion. Quickly I rose, lifting the boy with me, and moved to the adjoining bathroom. I cleaned him up then sat him down on a corner bench. I was fairly certain that he couldn't even see me through his own exhaustion, so I stripped myself and left him there while I dressed in my night clothes. I returned to him with a spare robe of mine and fastened him in it, then put him into bed. I was too exhausted to even think any more that night, so I quickly slid into bed beside him. Even asleep as he was, he pressed back against me, the drugs were wearing off and he was shivering in the after-effects. I pulled him against my chest, cradling him to my warmth and fell asleep, peaceful and content as I have ever been.


	28. Wufei27

Wufei POV

My life was over. Seems like an over-dramatic, childish statement coming from a scholar such as myself, especially seeing that I was not dead nor intended to be so. As a matter of fact I would probably live the next few years of my life in the lap of luxury.

As someone's slave. A pet. A toy.

My pride would not let me live with this, it told me to fight and free myself. It wanted to restore my honor. My intellect told me that I would never be able to regain my honor. That I was beyond help and fighting against the wishes of my emperor would only serve to deepen my disgrace. It wanted me to give up. Only a few years ago, I would have given in without a fight to the wishes of those around me, but that had changed. Merrian would have fought. Merrian did fight, and she fell with honor. I would not have the same fate.

The memories of what happened to my honor, my home, and my young wife are too painful to stir at this moment. Later, when I have been beaten and broken, I will look back on the happy times we shared and try to drown out the painful times. My memories will be my only solace.

I can recount some of my less painful memories, ones that happened after my tragic downfall. I was accused of sorcery by one of the emperor's advisors while working in a library close to the imperial palace, waiting for word of my family's estate. Though I doubt the advisor, Noventa, had any real evidence that I was a sorcerer, his accusation was not false. I had been battling with powers beyond my control for some time, but I hid them carefully and no one had ever learned my secret, not even my wife.

I would have been burned, the traditional punishment for sorcery, if not for the fact that I am somewhat attractive. It had been rumored for some time that I was more attracted to the other boys than I was to the girls because of my inability to produce an heir, so I was told that I would be given to a powerful foreign lord with a taste for young boys.

I was prepared for him just hours before I was to be given. It was not a gentle lesson. There were five people total assigned to help prepare me for my new role. Four of them held me down while a fifth one "cleaned" me. The room we were in was small and dirty, housing only a large iron tub filled with cold water and an old rug over the dirt floor. The room was used for peasant girls to wash before they would meet with soldiers for liaison. In other words, it was a whore bath.

I was held down over the side of the tub, my legs held apart and my arms pinned to the cold metal, while someone pushed a tube into my rectum and filled my insides with icy water. My muscles instantly cramped and I cried out before biting my lip to keep silent. After what felt like hours, they allowed me to release on the ground outside, like an animal. One of them stayed with me while I did it, holding my hair in a vicelike grip in case I ran. Then they repeated the process.

I had thought that they would end it after that, perhaps giving me a bath and sending me to await the lord. I was wrong. The next part was worse. I was again held down, this time to the dirty rug on the floor. My legs were pried apart and a slick oil was applied to my anus. They had me pinned so that I could not even look behind me to see what was happening. I was taken so much by surprise when something blunt and long was shoved into my protesting body that I screamed in pain. One of my captors slapped me across the face to silence me. The person behind me continued to shove the thing into me little by little, inch by painful inch. I would not let myself scream, nor would I cry like a weakling, but I couldn't help the moaning and whimpering sounds that came out of me. It was mortifying.

Finally, there was no more of the thing to push inside me. I sighed, thinking it was over. Again, I was wrong. I felt the thing inside me being pulled out, but it was instantly shoved back in even deeper than it had before. I cried out, but there was no pity for me. The person continued to pull that horrible thing out of my body, only to shove it back in a second later with a force that made me cringe. Sometimes the person would pull it up and down, or side to side, stretching my canal. Sometimes they would spin the thing inside of me, it would stick to my insides and pull painfully when it came loose.

By the time it was over, I was panting and clutching at the carpet desperately, biting my bloody lips. A signal was given and I was released, that damned thing still inside of me. I simply lie there, on the floor, too exhausted and hurt to move. I managed to role over onto my back, but that was it. One of my captors came back and bent in front of me, lifting my legs. I was too tired to fight them as they pulled the thing out from inside me and revealed it to be a phallus of less than average size. It seemed strange how such a small, blunt thing could be used in such a painful manner.

I was lifted by two of the captors and unceremoniously dropped in the tub, where the other two scrubbed me until my skin was raw and I was shaking from the cold. I couldn't bring myself to care. They pulled me out and toweled me dry, then applied various make-up and oil to my body, covering some of the bruises and scratches I had recently acquired. There was nothing to be done about the long scar that adorned my stomach. My final decoration was a tight, intricately carved band that was fastened tightly around my penis to prevent me from coming. It was so tight that it nearly cut off my circulation and I thought they would pull my manhood off trying to get it on.

I was given a long, tattered but clean robe to wear, though at that time I could not understand the fake modesty I was being given. They took me inside the palace, I had never been there before but couldn't quite feel honored under the circumstances, and up a winding stairwell to a small room. It was obviously the room of a healer, various herbs and minerals were scattered about the room. A man, old and tired looking, came out of the piles of books stacked in one corner. My hands itched to look at some of the volumes, but I realized with a hint of disappointment that I might never read another book. It would all depend on how kind my... my master was. Though the best thing he could possibly do for me would be to kill me, but I had little hope of that.

The man walked over to me, a hint of annoyance showing on his face, and injected me with something. Just a quick prick on the arm and then we left, but I felt the effect almost immediately. My head swam and my vision blurred. I had been imprisoned for the past two days, unable to palate any of the slime we were fed. Though I had not eaten in two days, I became nauseous and would have vomited had there been anything in my stomach.

We walked. I don't know where or how far. I can't remember much of what we saw. Once we passed a servant walking a dog, one of the ones bred for beauty instead of skill. It was done up in red ribbons and combed to perfection, held on a thick leather leash and collared by a gold collar. All I could think was, "That's me. That's what I'm going to be." It was not a normal thought for me and the next thing I knew the dog and servant were gone. I remember walking passed a window and seeing the trees. I wondered if it was the last time I'd ever see them and stopped for a moment, only to be roughly shoved and forced to walk away from the windows. I don't remember stopping or entering the room, but I remember very clearly when my robe was removed and I was shoved onto the bed. There were more people in the room now, but I couldn't see clearly enough to tell how many. They held me as I struggled, weakly, and tied me to the bed in the most provocative position they could. Then they left and I was alone in the room.

I remember thinking that I wouldn't let him hurt me like that. That I'd be ready for him when he came. What I had expected to do is beyond me, but I was going to do something. I remember that it got harder and harder to focus, and there was with hot feeling in my stomach. I remember seeing an ginger haired man, obviously foreign, hovering over me and wondered how he could have snuck up on me like that. I remember that he cut my bonds and let me down to the bed. I remember him pushing me back against the bed and climbing on me, I tried to push him away. My next memory was of being seated across his lap in a chair, though I had no memory of how we got there. I remember him asking me questions and suddenly, I knew he knew about my sorcery. I remember there being a sharp pain of something entering me and I prepared myself to yell and scream until he killed me. I remember the band coming off my member and I remember the pain I felt once it was off. I remember reaching down and masturbating, but I don't remember where the ginger haired man went. I remember being lifted, but I couldn't open my eyes. I remember someone cleaning the semen off of my chest, and I remember someone lifting me again. And then nothing.

I awoke slowly, with a pounding headache. I was quick to note that I was not in my own bed at home, nor was I on a lumpy mat in the library, nor was I curled up on the floor in the dungeon. The strange bed was warm and soft and I was tempted to just go back to sleep.

But as I began to wake more fully, I found things in the room that I could just not ignore. Like the fact that I was naked. Or the fact that there was a large man sleeping behind me.

I sat up as quickly as I could. The man beside me stirred but did not wake. Desperately I looked around and found myself in the same room I had been put last night. Had I been taken? I didn't remember, but there was much about last night that I didn't remember. Wouldn't there be some residue from the encounter? But it might have been washed away along with my seed. Why else would I have been put in the man's room, if he wasn't going to use me? I must have been too drugged to remember being taken. The dog! To take someone while they could not defend themselves. I would avenge my honor and die a warriors death!

I leaped out of the bed, startling the other occupant, and grabbed one of the swords that hung above the bed. They were made to be decorations, but I didn't plan to use them in a long battle. I took the sword and fell back into a battle stance on my side of the bed. I must have been a sight, wearing nothing but my skin and brandishing a sword on a sleeping man.

The man with the ginger hair yawned and sat up, casting a glance to me but seeming unsurprised. Like I was too weak to be of any threat. It made me angry.

"Defend yourself, you foreign pig!" I raged at him, but he simply stretched his arms above his head.

"Good morning, Wufei," he told me. I could only stare at him in disbelief. I shook myself, it had to be a trick.

"Defend yourself! I will defeat you in combat and regain my honor!"

"Wufei..." but I wasn't listening. I made a pass at him, intending to give him a shallow cut on the skin and show him that I wasn't playing games. He easily dodged to the side and used my momentum to throw me across the bed. While I tried to regain my footing, he grabbed the other sword from the wall. I had just managed to get back to my feet when he attacked, knocking the sword from my hands and laying his blade at my throat. I stilled for a long time, too shocked to do anything.

I had lost. I would never regain my honor.

"Kill me. Please, kill me," I begged him, but he was unswayed.

"No."

He turned and picked up my fallen sword, then replaced them both on the wall. I fell to the floor, despair and grief washing over me. Would it be too dramatic to say that I was doomed?

"Here," he told me, pulling a robe out from under the sheets of the bed and handing it to me. "Put this on. It must have fallen off while you were asleep."

Fallen off while I was asleep? I wondered as I slipped into the soft robe. Meaning it had been on me last night? But why would he bother to dress me?

"Wufei, why did you feel the need to attack me?" he asked me. I didn't bother to look up, nor did I disobey him by not answering his question. He owned me now.

"I wished to restore the honor you had taken from me."

"Taken from you?"

"By using my body for your own pleasure."

"Wufei," he said, his tone stern as he lifted my face to look him in the eyes, "I doubt you would believe me if I simply told you the truth, but you may believe this. I am not a small man in any way. Had I taken you quickly and in that position, you would not be able to walk today, let alone fight like that. I did not use you, nor am I going to without your consent. Your honor is safe."

I could only stare at him as he moved away. He was right, I had trouble walking after they had put the phallus inside me, it would be worse if something bigger had gone in. I was still a slave... but my honor was still intact. I felt a glimmer of hope and tried to squelch it. After all, he could still use me, couldn't he? But, then again, he had just promised he wouldn't and he passed up the chance when he obviously could have had me last night... better not get my hopes up too high.

"So, what would you like for breakfast?" he asked.

"Ya Zu Kuei," I answered, without even thinking about it. Ya Zu Kuei was one of my favorites and I had them for breakfast whenever I could. I looked up, startled at my lapse, to see the man frowning slightly.

"I've never heard of those."

"They are made of deep fried dough. The name translates into Deep Fried Devils."

The man smiled at me, his frown fading to nothingness. "Well then, I'm sure the chef could whip some up. I believe if I plead a headache we can have breakfast served up here instead of in the hall, don't you think?"

I only nodded, my headache combined with the recent events had my mind somewhat boggled. My stomach was still upset, but I was so hungry. And tired, I just wanted to eat and go back to sleep.

The man disappeared out the door, only to return a moment later. He must have gotten his way, because he was smiling slightly. I was too dazed to think properly.

"Wufei," he said as he began to take clothes out of the dressers, "Perhaps you shouldn't sit on the floor," he told me, then went into another room and shut the door. I looked down at myself, realizing that I had forgotten I was sitting on the floor and giving him a strategic advantage. I quickly lifted myself off the floor and sat on the side of the bed.

The man returned to the room a little later. I was beyond telling time, but it seemed fairly quick compared to other nobles I had seen. Most of them would have attendants sleep in their rooms too, I wondered about his attendants.

It was also the first time I noticed the large wings on his back. Like our emperor, who had golden wings, this man also had wings, but of a deeper red shade. It reminded me of roses in full bloom, since the color of his wings was a deep rose red.

"Now," the man said, approaching me and sitting on the other side of the bed, "I should probably introduce myself. I am called Treize. I already know your name is Wufei..."

"How did you know that?" I asked, not realizing at the time how rude it was to interrupt and how badly I could have been punished. Treize didn't even blink, thinking nothing of my boldness.

"You told me, last night. Don't you remember?" I simply shook my head.

"I... was not in my right mind last night," I told him, evading the fact that I was drugged. It seemed, though, that this man was not nearly as stupid as I had begun to think.

"You were drugged," he clarified. I simply nodded in assent. "Where do you come from? Do you have family that you could return to?"

I bit my lip and wondered if he was thinking about selling me back to my family. It wouldn't be a very prosperous venture for him, but it was the kind of thing noble lords did with unwanted slaves. I shuddered at the thought. If Lord Treize did not want me, I would be burned at the stake for my sorcery. For all the bravery and bravado I tried to show, that thought scared me. I did not want to die slowly and dishonorably like that.

"Wufei?" Treize asked, trying to call me back from my thoughts. "Wufei, did you hear my question? Do you have a family waiting for you?"

So, should I have lied and be discovered later for a liar and a coward, or tell him the truth and have him sell me to another, less honorable man or return me to the emperor? In the end, I really made neither decision, my fear drove me to shout, "I won't tell you! I won't tell you about my family, not under torture you cur!"

I leapt to my feet and prepared to dash out the door. Where I would run or how I would get passed the guards seemed unimportant as long as I got away from this man. The fact that, if the guards didn't beat me to death, I would have starved alone in the countryside, was not important.

So I suppose it was lucky for me that Treize was, and always has been, faster than I am. He darted and arm out and grabbed my shins, tripping me before I even got to the other side of the bed. I fell into a heap on the floor, but with my years of martial arts training I tried to kick Trieze and gain my freedom. He made my attempt look pitiful, by reaching out and grabbing my foot in midair, then bending my legs back so that I couldn't move on the floor. I felt the pain grow as the muscles stretched to accommodate the awkward position. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Treize leave the bed and move to the floor beside me. I felt him press his knee into the small of my back and pin me so that I was trapped and helpless. All this in mere seconds.

"Wufei, if you promise not to run again I will release you," Treize told me calmly. I muttered a few curses in my native tongue and Treize patiently held me down until the strain on my leg was too much and I was forced to concede. Treize released me and rolled off, I pulled myself into a sitting position and pulled my leg up to rub at the cramped muscles.

"Here, let me do that," Treize said, and pulled my leg out flat before I could reply. Gently, he worked the knots of tension out of my leg until it no longer hurt, then even after the muscles had all relaxed.

"Wufei," he said quietly, not looking at my face as he continued to rub my leg, "I will only be here for six more days, then I will return to my home country. It will take me three days to make arrangements for you. That means that in two days you must tell my where your family is. I promise that I will not endanger your loved ones, but you must tell me."

"And what will you do if I don't?" I asked him. I now knew for certain that he did want to sell me back, since he thought I was afraid for my family's safety. What would happen to me without that family?

"I will return you to the emperor," he told me, then got up and went to the door. I sat there, frozen with fear. There was no way around it. In six days time, I would be burned at the stake.


	29. Treize28

Treize POV

I watched the boy digest what I had said with a look that could only be described as dread. This worried me a bit. I could understand that he would want to protect his family from a potentially powerful lord, but this was going a bit far. It wasn't like I couldn't just ask Lizong to tell me, so I wondered what the boy was hiding from me. I decided that it would be best to give him some time, since we had just met and, under the circumstances, I wasn't surprised that the boy didn't trust me. I also had to give him credit since he hadn't lied. With my years in harsh negotiations I had become quite adept at seeing through lies and would have spotted his immediately. It takes a brave man to stand up for himself in the face of someone like me, I could respect that.

I still hadn't decided whether or not I would really return him to the emperor if he didn't tell me about his family. Beyond the fact that I hesitated at thrusting the boy into a situation of which I knew nothing about, it might be taken as an insult to the easily offended emperor. If he could tell me where his family was, even a distant relative that would take him in, I could arrange for him to be taken there under the table. Without all the information, though, I was at a loss for what to do.

The boy's stomach rumbled loudly, pulling me out of my musings. I released his foot hastily, I had forgotten I was holding it, and stood up, then offered a hand to Wufei. He did not take it, though I was not surprised, and got to his feet on his own. I had been impressed when he had not whimpered at the strain I had put on his leg to subdue him, but I had already learned that his pride was something he valued highly. If I left him in the hands of the emperor, if he fell into the hands of someone who had no qualms in taking his body in the most guttural ways... it would break him. I shuddered to think of the boy lying in his own blood, his eyes far away in a look that I had seen on a few people, male and female, that had been in ransacked towns when the marauders came through. No matter how good the care was, or how much their loved ones tried to console them, they never came back. Though many people could survive through the terrible experience with only the scars on their bodies and hearts, there were some that couldn't. Once broken, always broken.

Wufei's stomach growled again, a little less loudly this time, and I grew concerned.

"Wufei, how long has it been since you last ate?" I questioned him. He simply looked at the floor, but eventually answered.

"Three or four days," he said simply. I frowned again. Why had the boy not eaten in so long? However, I held my tongue. Asking him a question right now would only make him think I was prying and that would make him angry.

I stood and walked out into the hall, where another servant was waiting.

"Could you bring up some juice and small pieces of fruit?" I asked, and the girl nodded vigorously before running off. I reentered the room and found that Wufei had moved from the floor to the armchair. I tried to repress the images of him that the chair brought and barely managed to. I had just sat down when there was a knock on the door signaling the servant had returned. Quickly, I rose and took the tray, sending the servant away. I set the tray down on the table near Wufei an, I swear, the boy was about to pounce on it. Only my presence in the room kept him from gorging himself. I poured him a glass of orange juice and handed it to him, leaving my hand on it to utter a warning.

"It's been days since you've last eaten. Drink this slowly and eat only little pieces at first, or you'll vomit," I cautioned. Wufei drank as slowly as he could make himself. I could see that it was difficult for the boy, but his pride was so easily wounded that I didn't dare to offer him aid.

The real food came soon and I found that I quite enjoyed the Yu Za Kuei. It was a bit like the doughnuts Duo was so fond of, but a little crispier.

It was obvious that Wufei enjoyed the meal, with the little, barely audible sounds of contentment he made, I had to guess that it was the first good meal he had in a long time. It was also obvious how exhausted he was, when he fell asleep with a pastry still in his hand. I smiled as he dropped it to the floor in his sleep, then bent and put him into the bed. I was a bit relieved that he had fallen asleep, I had to talk with Lizong and his advisors soon and I wasn't sure what to do with the boy. I quickly put on the rest of my formal attire, which consisted of my boots, belt, jacket, ceremonial sword, and the small dagger I kept in my sleeve. I called to one of the servants that I found were in constant attendance around my room and informed him that Wufei should not be disturbed, but I would appreciate it if someone checked on him from time to time and make sure he was comfortable. I told him that I wanted the boy well rested. The servant looked at me oddly and nodded.

The meeting with the emperor was boring and nothing was really accomplished. I wasn't even certain what we were meeting over, since all our treaties were solid and we were both in good terms.

When I returned, later that evening, I found Wufei in good spirits. He looked much better having rested all morning. I suggested that we go down to the gardens. I had already been in the gardens once, but they were so immense that I had only seen a part of them and I was dying to see more of the waterfalls that housed the small golden fish. I was also fairly certain that Wufei would enjoy it, he did seem a bit excited, restrained like any good aristocrat, but excited none the less.

We didn't talk much on our walk, though I could see that he had questions to ask me and I wanted to know more about him also, but I think that each of us knew that any conversation would spoil the mood of the garden. So we walked in a comfortable, if a bit unfamiliar, silence.

It was late when we got back to the palace. We had missed dinner, I had eaten lunch during our meeting and Wufei had assured me the servants had brought him lunch, so we were able to eat in the privacy of my room again. After that I went to the library. I told Wufei I had decided to go to the library, but didn't ask him at first. I had wanted to see if he had any interest in going, since I didn't want to drag the boy places he would rather not go, but I could see that he desperately wanted to go and his pride kept him from asking. In the end I invited him along and was soon glad I did.

Wufei was a bit shy when we first entered the library, but was soon enthralled by the ancient and unique books he found. It was like watching a child in a candy shop, the way his face would light up every time he saw a rare book. I could tell instantly that he was a scholar. It was strange, how did a gently-raised scholar find his way into my bed? The questions were driving me mad, but I dared not alienate Wufei by asking them. It would be better to gain a bit of his trust before asking him about his past.

I was not surprised to find Wufei asleep with a book open in his lap that night. I could tell the boy was still recovering from whatever had happened to him recently but was too stubborn to let himself rest. Though, I must admit, seeing him curled up in the armchair by the lamp, his head resting on his shoulder and the open book spread across his lap, it was simply adorable. That boy was too beautiful for his own good, but I guessed that he had already learned that.

I would like to say that the boy's sleep was as peaceful as the last night, but I attempt not to lie as often as I can. I awoke to the sounds of distress deep into the night to find Wufei thrashing beside me. The boy was easily soothed with quiet words and soft touches and quickly slipped back to a restful sleep, but had another nightmare only hours later. In the end, I clutched him firmly to my chest, something I had avoided doing for fear of scaring him, and he slept the rest of the night. It seemed that, though his mind was still tentative about trusting me, his subconscious knew that I would allow nothing to happen to him.

I again woke before Wufei, quickly removing myself from his arms so that he didn't awake to find himself so close to another man. I had to leave before Wufei was even awake that morning, Lizong was taking me to see the dragon nests and the way his people worked together with the dragons. It was a long trip to the larger nests made worse by the fact that we were expected to ride in a carriage instead of flying. I would not return until dinner, so I informed the servants that Wufei should, once again, be left to rest but was now allowed to travel the gardens if he wished. That was as far as I could allow him, for his own safety. I was unsure of how my "concubine," as Lizong had called him, would be treated by the guards and servants. I doubted that they would hurt him, but one could never be too certain. The sooner I returned him to his family, the better.

However, the more I learned about the boy, the more I seemed to like him. I found myself thinking, on the long and boring journey, that it would not be so bad to take him back to Haven with me. Quatre would adore him for his love of books and Duo would set to pranking him at once. And, it wouldn't be so bad to have some company while the other two were away for myself. It was sometimes hard, being a leader as I was, I was forced to put the people I trusted most in positions that they would be away from me for long periods of time. Others that would have been true companions for me were drowned out by the ones that were interested in gaining my favor because of my power and their own ambition. It was rare to see someone who acted as bravely as Wufei when face with a man who had conquered a country. I wondered for a time if Wufei even knew who I really was, since he hadn't known my name and I hadn't told him my title. I toyed with that thought for a while, then dismissed it. It didn't do me any good when Wufei was not around to ask.

The trip to the nests was... uneventful and boring. It was neat, of course, to see the intricate harnesses that were used on the dragons and way the dragons helped to sew and cut the crops, but the knowledge was of little use to me. My country could not support dragons outside for more than a few months and we had no where near the man power or resources to begin to use the huge animals. Beyond that, I was not actually allowed to see how the harness was made or how the dragons were tamed, so it was of little use to me anyway. Only the emperor and his advisors knew how to tame the dragons.

I returned to the palace exhausted and irritable. The uselessness of the whole outing combined with the stupidity of riding when flying would have been a thousand time fast had put me into a dark mood.

I found Wufei, unsurprisingly, reading by the window when I returned. The stack of books that I had taken from the library for him was dwindling already and I could tell that I would have to make another trip with him soon. But at that time I wanted nothing more than to shower, eat something, and go to sleep. Tonight was not the night to question Wufei and I knew it. My patience was almost non-existent and I would only become angry and do something rash. I would have to question him the next morning, though, so that I would have time to make arrangements before it was time to leave. Beyond that, I was beginning to worry about keeping Wufei here. The emperor had been asking about the boy a bit and I had been forced to tell him that he was too exhausted to leave the room, which was true, but not for the reasons that the emperor assumed. There was to be a ball on my fourth night and the emperor had told me to bring the boy, saying that I would have to go easy on him and let him get a little rest so that he could attend.

I was just getting into the shower when Wufei knocked on the door.

"Would you like me to ask the servants to bring up dinner?" he asked, his voice oddly quiet compared to his usual personality.

"If you wouldn't mind," I told him. When I came out of the shower, dinner had been laid out on the table and the aromas were delicious. I sat down and ate with a vigor that would have impressed starving wolves. Okay, maybe not that bad, but still. Wufei ate with the same high-born manners I had seen in him earlier, and I again wondered about his heritage. Had he disgraced his family in some way? Was that why he wouldn't tell me about them? For the time being, I could only wonder.

I was the first to climb into bed that night, exhausted from the days travels. Wufei came to bed only moments after me, but hesitated. It was the first time he had actually chosen to sleep in the same bed as me and he seemed a bit anxious. I tossed the covers on his side back, an invitation.

"You can sleep wherever you want," I told him, "but the floor is not comfortable and the other rooms may not be safe. No one would attack me, the emperor's guest, but they might attack you to prove a point. You are safest close to me."

"I can defend myself," the boy stated haughtily. I smiled in the darkness.

"No warrior can constantly defend his own back without the aid of his friends."

"I have no friends," the boy said softly, yet climbed into bed beside me. It was all I could do to hold my tongue and not tell him, "I am you friend." Wufei would not have believed me anyway.

The next day went by quickly. I went to breakfast in the formal hall at the request of Lizong. Wufei was not able to attend, something I had mixed feelings about, because of his lack of clothes. He had been wearing my robe, since it was the only thing that would stay on him, for the passed two days. I called for a tailor that day, but was unable to attend the appointment. I had another meeting with Lizong and his ambassadors, this time to discuss the trading between our two nations. Of course, it was really only a preliminary meeting, the real meeting would be held in two days where we would discuss how the futures of our two countries were planned. Today would probably only be an introduction and explanation of what each province had to offer. I, also, would be explaining the vast, untapped mineral resources beneath the Russian ice, something that we would need dragons to thaw in order to get at.

And that, really, was what the whole trip was about. Lizong needed my minerals to keep his economy strong and I could not get at those minerals without his dragons. But it was more than that. Russia could not support a dragon even if we got one. In the same way, the Chinese wouldn't know how to get the minerals out of the tough Russian rocks even if they mined them out themselves. Which is why we needed a partnership.

And so, I gritted my teeth and bore all of Lizong's boring traditions. I decided that Wufei was only a few years younger than myself, he could handle getting his own clothes. I told Wufei that the tailor would come around noon and instructed the tailor to give Wufei a few outfits. Something warm and heavy, something that he could exercise in, and a few other sets of clothes, then left it in his hands. The only thing I really thought Wufei would need were the two I had specified and I was dying to see how well Wufei handled a sword.

When I returned that night I found Wufei in a white outfit traditional of Chinese boys for fighting. It seemed to suit him well and I thought about having more made for him when I returned to Haven, only to realize that he would be long gone. The thought was met with a rather inappropriate pang of sadness.

That was the first night that Wufei dined in the banquet hall. He was understandably nervous, seated at a table with the ruler of his country and the man that had forced him into slavery must have been a bit intimidating. I wondered briefly what he would think when he learned that I was probably as powerful as Lizong, if not more. Though Wufei might have found dinner an anxious affair, I found it boring. Too many old men speaking of politics and war tactics that they knew nothing about. Wufei however, seemed riveted by some of the conversations, the scholar in him showing through once again.

Later that night, I took Wufei into the courtyard and found a secluded little place to spar with him. At first, he hesitated at taking the sword, I believe there is some policy about slaves not holding swords in China or some other nonsense. However, I was able to get a good look at the swordsman in Wufei when I threw the sword to him and he caught it mid air, bringing it down into a more secure hold with a graceful arc of the blade. I charged him, and he dodged out of the way.

We continued to fight for several hours. Wufei seemed to enjoy the battle as much as I did, though I could see that it was a blow to his pride every time I defeated him. Wufei's style of fighting relied too much on looks, on making his opponent look away from the blade of his sword so that he could attack. Any swordsman with good concentration could defeat that style, though Wufei's skill was nothing to mock at. In a few years, he would give me a run for my money, but as it was Wufei merely lacked the experience I had.

When we finally returned to the room, we were both too tired to bathe, though we were both sweaty. We fell into bed, barely managing to kick our shoes and shirts off and I was asleep within seconds of lying down, I doubt Wufei was awake much longer.

It dawned on me later that I didn't have the time to see what the tailor had made Wufei, but that didn't seem important at the time. It also came to my attention that I had forgotten to ask Wufei about his family, but I decided to put it off for one more day. As long as I had two days to make arrangements I would be fine, but I could not risk taking any longer than that.


	30. Treize29

Treize POV

The next day was the day of the ambassador's ball. Really, I believe that it was just a way for Lizong's advisors to put me together with the ambassador's daughters in hopes of finding a matrimonial match and thus cementing our relations in traditional Chinese style, which was absurd since they all believed that I was gay. Still, my background would not allow me to be rude and I ended up dancing with more girls that night than I could ever remember.

It was not necessary for Wufei to arrive at the ball as early as I did, so I let him sleep late, our dueling the previous night had worn him out. I also told the servants to help Wufei with his outfit, which I had not had the time to see before leaving.

The party went on all day with a buffet in the main dining hall so that the party didn't even need to stop for meals. Wufei didn't make an appearance until lunch, but he managed to make a splendid entrance.

He was dressed in a sheer, skintight outfit that hugged his body like a second skin. Around his shoulders was a long, red-velvet cape that rippled down to the floor and pooled around his ankles. Around his waist was a red loincloth of the same color embroidered with gold that hung down passed his knees. On his hands and feet were think leather gloves and moccasins, also conforming to his body and outlined in gold. His hair was down from the ponytail that he liked to wear and his eyes were lined with kohl to make them appear larger.

For a moment, all I could think of was how stunningly beautiful he was. Then, he knelt at my feet and I couldn't think at all.

This was not a kneeling one does to show respect. This was a gesture of submission, showing that I had full control and domination of him.

I hated it. I would have liked nothing more than to stand Wufei up and tell him that never under any circumstances was he to kneel to me like that again.

But with all those Chinese politics watching, not to mention the emperor, that would have been a grievous cultural error. It would have offended many of the guests, who had also brought their concubines who behaved in a similar fashion, and it would have been an insult to the emperor.

"Rise, Wufei," was the only thing I could say to him. Obediently, he rose and moved to my side. I could tell from his body language he was nervous and uncomfortable in the clothes he was wearing. As Lizong approached us, Wufei moved behind me even more, not so much in a cowering way but as an instinctive need to get to a better defendable position. Besides, he had no idea that behind me was probably the only place in the room where he would be safe from Lizong.

"What do you think of your pet's new attire?" he asked me. I ignored his use of the word "pet" though I would have challenged any other person to a duel for such an insult to someone under my protection.

"It's a bit revealing, isn't it?" I asked him. His smile only broadened.

"I am told that this is the highest fashion amongst concubines. However, I see you are more the jealous type, eh?"

"I do not share well," I told him, but failed to elaborate.

"I can understand that you would want to keep him all to yourself, but it seems that you are not enjoying my gift. I have heard that you have not taken him as your own. Are you not pleased?"

My surprise was not well hidden as I turned sharply to look at Wufei. The boy seemed just as surprised that the emperor had this information as I and I immediately regretted being suspicious of him. But the only other way someone could have known that I had not been physically involved with Wufei would be to check, and I shuttered to think that someone had been able to do that to him without my knowledge. The sooner he was safely away from this place, the better.

"There are other ways to gain pleasure," I replied to him and failed to mention that I had not used these other methods.

"Ah, but I want to make sure you are satisfied with your gift. If you wait until you return to your home to test this one out, you may find that you are not pleased with him, and that would not due. Perhaps it would be better if I presented you with a different gift? I could take this boy off your hands and get you a young, exotic boy from India. Or anywhere, really." What was Lizong up to? What was he pushing for? I had already accepted his gift, there was no reason to question me.

Still I could see that Lizong was trying, for some reason, to get me to relinquish Wufei to him. I only had two choices. One was to take the boy's body and make sure it was rough enough to leave evidence. The other was not much better.

"Wufei is mine and mine alone. What I wish to do with him is my choice and not to be heard of by anyone else. Wufei is mine," I said and turned to face Wufei, drawing the ceremonial sword I wore at my waist. Without letting Wufei see, I cut my thumb on the blade of my sword, then moved my hand to cup his face. Gently, I drew my thumb across his lips. Surprised by feeling something warm and wet on his lips, he darted his tongue out to taste the bitter liquid without thinking about his actions. As the taste of my blood hit him, he made a sour face, his eyes showing confusion. But when I raised his hand and drew my sword, his face showed surprise and anxiety. It was only when I cut his thumb and moved it toward my mouth that he realized what I was doing. His face went white with fear and he feebly tried to pull away, but I held him firm. Quickly, I licked the blood that pooled on his finger and sealed our bond.

The sealing of my bond with Wufei was different from other bonds that I had made. He was lonely and frightened and, while a part of him called out to my mind for comfort, another part fought against me. But it was a blind battle. Wufei didn't have the knowledge or the experience to fight against someone as strong as me and soon gave in, allowing his mind to touch mine.

His emotions hit me like a waterfall. They cascaded around me until it felt like I was drowning. The dominant emotion was fear, followed by betrayal, trust, anxiety, shame, and many more that I did not get time to notice. I hurried to put up walls, ever conscious of the people around me and my need to protect Wufei.

When I came back to myself, the first thing I saw was Wufei, looking dazed, frightened, and more helpless than I had seen him since he was tied to the bed. I hated having to force him into this position, but it was the only way to keep him safe until he was far from the palace. Once I found his family I could break our link, and until then it would alert me if anything bad should happen to Wufei.

I turned to the emperor, only to find that he was just as white, if not whiter, than Wufei. He looked horrified and I had wonder again what he was thinking. He should have been happy.

"Follow me," the emperor ordered shakily, then abruptly turned and left the room. Quickly, I motioned for Wufei to stay and followed. At the door to a small conference room, Lizong did something that astounded me. He told his guards to wait outside. The emperor was never to be without his guards, he was to be protected at all times. But Lizong was adamant and eventually got his way. Inside the room, Lizong began pacing and I worried about what was bothering him. After all, though I sometimes thought him annoying and disliked him as a ruler, I did consider him a friend, though not a very close one.

"My friend," he told me, his voice grave, "I believe my naivety has caused you great problems. That boy, that you have bonded you mind to, is a sorcerer. When he was brought here, I did not know the charges brought against him, only that he was sentenced to death. I saw him being dragged in and thought that he was very pretty and would make a nice gift for you. When I finally learned what he was, I feared that I was too late and you had already been tainted by him. When I was told that you hadn't taken him, I was overjoyed and sought to take him from you without revealing my error. But I believe I have made an even worse mistake in questioning you, because now you are linked to his mind and soon he will control you. Please! You must break the link with him and save yourself. My guards will protect you from the boy and kill him once it is safe for you."

Lizong spoke these words with such a conviction, such a certainty, that I knew telling him about Wufei's goodness would do nothing. Nor would telling him that sorcerers were not evil, and saying that would probably have gotten me accused of being possessed by Wufei, which would have gotten him killed. Instead, I decided to humor the emperor and save Wufei at the same time.

"The boy is young and not yet strong enough to use his powers," I told Lizong, "He is still weak enough for me to control. Were your guards to attack him, he might kill them in a frenzy of power. However, being inside his mind I can keep him calm and sedate, I can keep him from using his powers. Perhaps, in time, I can save him from this sorcery," I told Lizong. The other man looked at me with what seemed to be a new found respect.

"You are very noble in your quest," he told me, "be careful, my friend. You cannot trust these sorcerers. It is a dark path they walk and you must always be on the lookout for trouble. I wish you all the luck in you new venture and I hope no ill falls upon you."

With that, Lizong stood and left the room. After a moment, I rose and followed him back to the party. When I arrived at the ballroom first, I worried because I could not see Wufei, but I soon found him standing in a corner of the room. Some of the other guest cast him sharp looks, others ignored him. The rest of the night passed in a blur as I stood beside Wufei, not bold enough to ask him to dance. I couldn't be sure, with the barriers I had constructed, whether he would dance because he wanted to, or out of some feeling of submissiveness toward me. So I said nothing.

It was hours later when I met up with Lizong again. The endless monotony of nobles speaking with me was wearing on my nerves and I had asked Wufei to bring me something to drink.

"Where is your pet," Lizong asked, startling me by coming up behind me. I could smell the sent of liquor as I turned and soon found myself face to face with a rather drunken Chinese emperor.

"His name is Wufei," I said, turning to face him.

"A pretty name. Did he come with it or did you give it to him?" Lizong asked and I struggled not to sigh. This was one of the reasons I disliked Lizong as a leader, he had grown up seeing his relatives order people around like they were dolls and could see no one below a noble as anything more than a toy. Lizong didn't mean to be cruel, he just couldn't help it.

"His name is Chang Wufei, his parents gave him that name, I assume. I sent him to get some drinks. See, here he is now," I said, pointing to Wufei, who was trudging across the ballroom, his head bent low over a tray of wineglasses.

"Ah, there's the lucky boy," Lizong said. Wufei dutifully kept his head down as he was addressed by the emperor, though I did see him sneak some peaks out of the corner of his eye. "It's not every day you're given to one of the most powerful men in the world, is it?" Lizong continued. Then, catching sight of Wufei's shocked and bewildered expression, he went on, "Ah! I see you haven't told him who you are, have you Treize? Well, I think I'll enlighten him for you! Wufei, you are owned by Treize Kushrenada, one of the most powerful and influential men in the world and the ruler of Russia!"

Wufei jumped and would have dropped the entire tray if I hadn't caught it. His eyes open wide in shock and I regretted not telling him myself. At the very least I could have told him a little more gently.

Soon, one of the emperor's advisors came over and escorted the tipsy leader away and to bed, saying he had caused enough damage for one night. I agreed, but kept silent. I could see Wufei's mind was going a mile a minute and finally decided to escort him out into the garden for a moment of privacy.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked angrily.

"Because I knew you'd react like this," I shot back, "And why didn't you tell me you'd been given an outfit like that?"

"I thought you knew!"

"I would never have let you come in something so revealing."

"Why? Do you want me all to yourself?"

"Wufei!" I barked sternly and he lowered his head, the anger seemed to drain away from him.

"I'm tired," he told me quietly, "I don't like surprises and I don't want to be here. I knew that you were a powerful lord, I just didn't know how powerful. I suppose that it doesn't change who you are, it was just a shock for me. You really didn't know I was going to be dressed like this?"

"I would never dress someone like you up in an outfit like this. The man who made it obviously works mostly with girls," I told him. His cheeks pinkened delectably, but he didn't reply. "Come," I told him, "the sooner we go back in the sooner we can leave."

It was late when we were finally able to leave. I would have liked nothing better than to have crawled in bed beside Wufei and slept the night away. But I had one more thing that had to be done that night.

After both Wufei and I were undressed and in our nightclothes, I asked him. Wufei was sitting on the bed, brushing his hair when I asked.

"Wufei, tell me where your family is," I asked him. He stilled in brushing his hair and, even through he barriers, I felt his panic come through.

"I won't tell you," he said, then put the brush aside and glared at me. I sighed, again preparing myself to do something I really didn't want to. I was only grateful that the boy would soon be safe and back where he belonged.

I moved to the bed and sat in front of Wufei. I could feel his tension but he would not cower or back away. Slowly but deliberately, I placed my hand on his shoulder.

"Wufei," I said, "I will ask you one more time, tell me where your family is. I promise that I will not harm you or them. I cannot leave you alone and I do not want to return you to the emperor. This is your last chance. Tell me where you family is."

Though I could feel the fear coming off of him, Wufei stubbornly shook his head. I took a deep breath, and began feeding pain through my barrier and across our link. Just as good feelings could be passed, so could negative ones. With Wufei's lack of knowledge about mental links and my barrier keeping me from feeling Wufei's pain, I was able to force him into a place where he wouldn't know what he was telling me. It would not hurt his body in any way and by morning most of the pain would probably be forgotten, but I still loathed causing him so much pain. But I didn't really have a choice.

"Wufei", I asked, when I had slowly brought the pain up to a place where I knew he would not be able to refuse me, "where is you family?"

Wufei's eye were wide with pain. He had fallen back against the bed, unable to even support himself, and was completely still in his agony, his muscles coiled like springs. When he answered, there were tears in the corners of his eyes.

"Dead," he told me, his voice soft and wrought with pain.

"All of them?" I questioned, hoping that was not the case.

"All of them," he affirmed. I quickly realized that it would take far too long to try and drag the whole story out of him.

"Wufei," I said, trying to get his attention as I lessened the pain just a bit, "Do you swear to me that you will tell me what happened at a later date?" I asked. I only got a nod in reply, but that was enough for me. I quickly shut off the pain and propelled his troubled mind toward sleep. Within a second, Wufei was in a deep slumber and I was left alone with my thoughts.

There really was no choice. Had I left Wufei, I knew he would have been killed immediately. There was no place else for him to stay in China. I realized that I would simply have to take him home with me. Duo would love to pick on him and Quatre would be thrilled to have someone share his love for books. Lady Une would want to drill him on Chinese fighting techniques, as Sally would want to know all about Chinese medicine. It would be good for Master O to have someone from his own country to talk to and he might agree to take Wufei on as an apprentice and show him how to work magic for the good of mankind. If anyone could convince Wufei sorcerers were good, it would be Master O.

That night, as Wufei's sleep was constantly interrupted by nightmares, I couldn't help but feel responsible for dredging up the sad memories. I could only hope the future would be brighter for my dragon warrior.

Wufei woke slowly the next morning. I watched him drift into the world of the wakeful as I sat by the bed. I had decided, late last night, that Wufei should not stay cooped up in the room all day. I thought it would be better to get him outside, into the fresh air. I had some spare time that morning before my meeting with the emperor and decided to take Wufei to explore the market place, as I had wanted to do for quite some time.

We both dressed and ate breakfast quickly. I wanted to get to the marketplace earlier so we would have more time to look around before I had to go to my meeting. Wufei looked glad enough to go to the market, though he didn't seem as excited as when I proposed taking him to the library. Perhaps we would find some books for him to read on the way to Haven, since the ones taken from the library would have to be returned before we left.

I was also hoping to find Wufei a sword and perhaps some other trinkets from his homeland. Wufei did not have any personal possessions with him and, though I wondered about it, I dared not stir bad memories only to satisfy my curiosity.

It was cool and cloudy when we set out. Heavy rains threatened to pour from the clouds and I hoped we were done with our shopping before the rains could start.

The market, despite the disagreeable weather, was alive with people. Vendors of every kind were about peddling their wares. I stopped to look at some exotic birds at one stall, some of a strange, purple breed of Chinese rose at another. Wufei showed no interest in the roses, but was mildly amused by the birds. I played with the idea of buying him one, but the birds were not of the sort that could be used for hunting and were very hard to care for. It was unlikely they would even survive the trip to Haven, let alone the temperature change.

There was a small shop that sold antiques, more of a rummage shop than anything, that we managed to find several books to buy. Wufei seemed pleased at the discovery of so many old books, all hidden away on a low shelf and covered in dust. We left with an entire bag full of the books, plus a few antique gifts for my friends at home.

There was only one place that really showed trouble for us. I had stopped at a vendor while Wufei was over looking at some swords at the next stall. This particular stall was hidden fairly well from the majority of people, being in an ally between two tall buildings. It really wasn't a stall since there was only a few poles holding a trap over some wares that were laid out on rugs on the ground. Still, it caught my eye and, more to get away from the crowd than anything, I pointed the stall out to Wufei and left the central street of the market.

I could tell that the merchandise in this stall was probably from mercenaries almost instantly. The man running the stall was a shrewd, beady eyed creature. As I looked through his wares I could see that some extremely valuable antiques had been priced very cheaply, telling me that the man had no idea what he was dealing with. Beyond that, some of the antiques were very personal objects, like a comb, hair piece, and family sword that would be passed down the generations. Also, the diversity of the objects made me wonder how else they could have been gotten. There were items like a half-finished quilt, a set of dolls, a large man's shirt, a set of plates, a pair of toy swords, and a small box of portraits.

The items in question seemed too personal for me to buy and I was about to leave when a beautiful sword caught my eye. I had been hoping to buy one for Wufei and this one would suit him perfectly. It had a ruby dragon carved on the hilt and a heavy blade that I could almost see Wufei wielding with ease. Still, I hesitated to take things that had obviously been begotten through unethical means.

I had just decided to leave the shop when I heard a gasp from behind me. I turned to see Wufei just as a flood of rage streamed through our link.

Wufei moved too fast for me to stop him. He grabbed the sword that I had been admiring and, as easily as I had imagined, drew it through the air. In a moment, he set his sights on the vendor and took a position to attack. As he rushed forward toward the helpless man I grabbed a metal candle holder and managed to hit the sword out of his hands. I was on my feet in the next instant, grabbing him around the waist and pinning his arms to his sides even as he fought against me. It was only at this time I began to hear the yells and curses Wufei was giving off.

"... kill them! Kill them all! For the honor of my family! I will have justice! Thief! Insolent cur! How dare you take what belongs to the dead! Let me go!"

It was then that I realized that what this man was trying to peddle must have come from Wufei's family. Whether they had died of disease and the mercenaries had robbed their tombs or the mercenaries themselves had killed them, Wufei's anger was directed at this man who was guilty of doing no more than selling what he was given.

"Wufei," I called, quietly but deliberately. My face was right next to his, so I spoke calmly into his ear. "Wufei, killing this man will not return honor to your family. He only sells what is given to him. Killing this man will not undo what has been done, nor will it return your family to you. You must be patient, your real enemies will show themselves to you," I told him. He still struggled against me, but not as insanely as he had before. And he had stopped screaming.

"Let me go," Wufei hissed, his voice tight with anger. "I will not hurt him, now release me!"

I let Wufei go, stepping back to give him space. I could still feel the powerful anger coursing through him, made even worse now that there was no target for it. Wufei seemed about to explode with anger when he suddenly bent and took the sword he had been using, then ran off. I knew that he would need some time alone, so I did not follow him. He needed to sort his mind out in private, where he didn't need to hide all of his feelings. He was not yet comfortable enough around me to trust me with his emotions, something I hoped to change one day.

The vendor, seeing Wufei running off with his sword, made ready to chase after him. I grabbed him as he went to passed me, telling him that I would buy the sword and everything else he had. I paid him well enough that he didn't complain about packing everything up and sending it to the palace for me. I doubted that it hurt that Wufei had scared him witless on that account.

As I was leaving the vendor, on my way to find Wufei, I noticed that the canvas that protected the man's wares had been slightly singed around the edges. It was odd, since I could have sworn that the canvas was in perfect condition when I came upon it, but I put it out of my mind. I even mentally made a crack about my age affecting my mind already.

I traced my link to Wufei and him sitting in front of a small pond full of gold and black koi. He sat, morbidly staring at the water as I came up behind him, the sword sitting on his lap. I said nothing as I stood behind him for a few minutes and he ignored me, though I knew that our link had alerted him of my presence. After a few minutes, Wufei rose and turned to me, but still said nothing.

"We need to return to the palace," I told him. He simply nodded and followed me as I lead him back to our room. I had to leave him in that sullen silence as I went to my meeting. I was loathe to leave him, but I knew his presence would not be welcome at the meeting. Just as I left Wufei, staring out the window at the gardens, I glanced out the window. The clouds still hovered above the ground, unable to release the heavy water inside them and thus float higher into the air. It was oddly the same way with Wufei, unable to release his tears and rid himself of the heavy burden of guilt and pain.


	31. Wufei30

Wufei POV

It was with a heavy heart that I returned to the palace that day. Seeing things that had been in my family for generations paddled on the street in such a manner... it seemed that even in death my family could not find peace. And it brought forth memories that I had attempted to bury. And then to realize that there was nothing to do, either to ease my pain or lay to rest my family, it was almost more than I could take.

My memories over took me as I stared out the window. Treize changed and left quietly, sensing that I needed time to myself, I think. It amazed me how well he knew me and, more than that,. How well I knew him. Of course the link that he had put on our minds might have helped.

But I wasn't thinking of any of these things while I sat at that window. My mind was far away, years ago, at picnics with my family, hunting with my father, or helping in the herb garden with my mother. Days when I was more innocent.

I don't know how long I sat there, reminiscing, but it was a knock on the door that brought me out of my memories. The person didn't wait for me to open the door, ignoring proper manners and barging into the room. It was a girl, probably in her mid twenties, with a sour expression on her face. She wore the uniform of a servant and didn't seem particularly refined, with her hair in a messy ponytail and her nails bitten to the quick. She glanced around the room once, then set her glare on me.

"Come. You are to await your master with the other concubines in the yard," she growled, grabbing my hand and pulling me to the door.

"But my shoes!" I protested. I had removed my shoes when I entered the room, they were now lying at the end of the bed.

"You should have thought of that before, you lazy whore! As it is you should already be waiting in the yard, but I had to be sent to fetch because you're lazy and stupid! Not even smart enough to follow your master's ass!" she continued to rant. I allowed her to drag me out the door and down the hall though I could have easily overpowered her. I just didn't have the will to fight her, to fight against the injustices wrought upon me. Fighting her would only cause more problems for me, so what was the use? Miserable and defeated as I was, I let her drag me down the halls, barefooted like a peasant, and into the yard.

There were three concubines already in the yard, all female, kneeling under large umbrellas. Several yards in front of us was a large, open structure. It sat in the middle of a large pond and was covered in roses. Only the red roof and the path leading to it could be clearly seen for all the beautiful flowers. I was pushed to the ground with the rest of the concubines and harshly told to stay there until my master came for me. The ground was damp and soaked through my pants in seconds, chilling me. The women had mats to sit on and heavy cloaks around them, I alone had nothing.

Just as I had no one.

I had no knowledge of what time it was or how long I knelt there, but eventually the rain started to pour, drenching my body with an icy rain. I began shivering instantly, but didn't move. Where would I have gone? I would have been sent back to my place in the rain. Besides, I think I was hoping that the rain would make me sick and I would die. So morbid were my thoughts.

The men came out of their meeting eventually. One at a time they walked passed us as they left, all carrying umbrellas. Two men stopped and took their concubines with them until only one woman and I were left. I looked at her for the first time. She was a small, delicate looking creature and I had to wonder how she had gotten herself into this position. She smiled at me when she saw me looking at her, but did not say anything. Shortly after that a man came by and stopped, helping her to stand and drawing her close to him in a very affectionate manner. I smiled, seeing them and thinking of how it could have been with Meiran and I, but that brought about sad thoughts so I stopped.

It seemed like a long time after that before Treize came out. My fingers and toes had gone numb. I could see my breath in font of my face every time I breathed. My shivers had stopped and I didn't feel quite as cold as I had, but I wasn't certain that was a good sign.

I was looking at the ground when I heard the footsteps and the startled gasp. I looked up to see Treize staring at me, shock written across his face. The umbrella fell from his fingers unnoticed as he rushed to kneel beside me.

"Are you alright? What happened?" he asked, pulling me to sit up. His hands felt like fire on my skin. I tried to sit up but I was feeling oddly sluggish.

"I was waiting for you," I told him, my voice softer than I had intended. Treize cupped my face with his hand and forced me to look at him.

"My god," he muttered, "your lips are blue," he whispered, running his thumb across said lips. The warmth of his hand felt good on my icy cheek and I leaned into his touch.

The next thing I knew I was being swept into Treize's arms and we were rushing into the palace and down the halls. I clung to Treize as he rushed down the halls, pushing startled servants out of the way in his haste. He burst into our room and didn't even put me down, just went straight into the bathroom and put me on the bench. He turned on the hot water in the bath tub and pulled off my shirt. This managed to startle me out of my daze.

"Let go of me!" I growled at him, backing away slightly.

"You have to get warmed up," he said calmly, despite his insistence that I get rid f all of my clothes.

"I can do it by myself! Get out!" I told him. He stepped back and I had the impression I had won.

"Can you?" he said slowly, looking at me in the way someone looks at a disobedient child. "If you can manage to take your pants off by yourself, I'll leave," he told me. I glared at him and my hands immediately went to my pants. I would still have my underwear on when I removed them and it wasn't like he hadn't seen me in less before anyway. Besides, despite the condition I was in, I needed to show that I was not weak enough to succumb to a little bit of cold weather.

However, as I tried to undo the button on my trousers, I found my hands to be oddly uncoordinated and uncooperative. I fumbled with the buttons but was unable to undo them. I could sense that Treize was getting impatient and hurried to do the seemingly simple task.

When the bathtub had filled and I had yet to undo the button or admit defeat, Treize's patience broke. Without warning, he lifted me and deposited in the bath, still close to fully clothed.

The water felt as though it was scalding me and I hissed in pain, clutching to Treize's arm as he lowed me into the water.

"Are you trying to cook me?" I hissed as he released me in the water and stepped back.

"The water is barely warm. Look, it's not even steaming. You're so cold that it feels hot, you're so cold your fingers are numb," he told me, running a washcloth up my arms, causing me to hiss as it burned my skin. I tried to sit up, but Treize held me back against the tub and started to rub my shoulders and neck with the washcloth. After a bit, I began to shiver so hard that I thought I would come apart.

I don't know how long I sat there, in a tub of luke-warm water, shivering, but Treize stayed with me the whole time. He continued to rub my skin with the washcloth until it didn't feel so hot. Eventually, the shivers lessened, but they wouldn't leave me entirely.

After a while I as just too tired to care what happened again. I had been fighting for so long... so long... and there was no rest in sight. I just couldn't seem to bring myself to care, even as Treize pulled me out of the tub and pulled the rest of my clothes off, leaving me naked on the bench while he went into the other room. I was just so weak... so tired...

Treize came back and dressed me in a large, soft shirt of his and my own underwear. I couldn't even bring myself to put my own clothes on. I must have looked so pathetic. Once dressed, Treize carried me out of the bathroom and put me into bed, covering me with the blankets and even going as far as to pull some extra blankets out of a trunk and pile them on me. I didn't fight him. I just didn't care. I was so very tired.

Treize quickly removed his own wet clothes and put on dry ones. I was surprised to see him put on a soft shirt and cloth pants, clothes he would only wear in the room. I was even more surprised when he came over to the bed and climbed in beside me, pulling me tight against his chest. Before I could stop myself, I had buried my cold and still shivering body in his chest, too tempted by the safety and warmth I felt when held by him. I could not bare to look him in the eye after my behavior, but felt that I needed to say something. I opened my mouth to apologize, but he held a finger to my lips. I was so surprised I finally looked him in the eye.

"Hush, little dragon, and sleep. You have fought a long and hard battle, but you must rest. I will fight in your place for now. Rest and you may take up your sword against your inner demons when you have the strength. I will fight beside you, when you have the strength. You are not alone, you need not act like it."

Somehow, his words soothed me. I had been so afraid that I would have to fight alone for the rest of my life, as punishment for not protecting my family. To have an ally... a friend... it was like a great weight had been lifted from me. I surrendered myself to Treize's care and was instantly asleep.

When I awoke later, all the blankets had been cast aside and I was sweating, though I was still shivering. I tried to lift my hand and retrieve my blankets from the bottom of the bed, but it felt as though my body was filled with lead. My hand moved slowly as I strained to reach my goal, but I was intercepted as Treize took my hand in his own and sat down beside me.

My hair must have come out of its holder, because it was streaming across my face. Gently, Treize pushed my hair out of my eyes, his hand coming to rest on my forehead. He frowned and removed his hand, replacing it with a cold cloth.

"Wufei," he called quietly, "Wufei, can you hear me?" I tried to respond, but could only moan. I realized that my throat was parched, but didn't know how to signal my problem to Treize. I didn't need to worry, though, because he seemed to sense my dilemma and brought a cup of water to my lips for me to sip. The water helped my throat, but made my stomach feel queasy. I closed my eyes, fighting the nausea and hoping to fall into the blissful ignorance of sleep, but was startled awake by the feeling of something icy running across my chest which, I now realized, was completely bare.

I jumped and tried to sit up, but Treize held me against the bed as he pulled the wet cloth across my chest. I felt like I was repeating something, only backwards.

"F-first you try to fry me, n-now you try to freeze me," I said to Treize, my voice fumbling as I shivered.

"Not a very honorable way to get rid of you, eh, little dragon?" he asked with a teasing grin on his face.

"W-what time is it? How long have I been asleep?" I asked.

"It is nearly midnight. You have been asleep hours, but you still need to rest. You caught a fever in the rain and it has only gotten worse. I've called for a healer, but it would be best if you slept until he arrives. Things will look better in the morning, for now you should sleep."

I couldn't help but think that my next shiver was one of fear, not cold, and I hated myself for it. I hadn't forgotten what I had told Treize last night, nor had I forgotten what he planned to do with me. In the morning, Treize would leave and I would be burned at the stake. And in my condition, if I was too weak, I would probably scream and beg for mercy, forever tarnishing my family name. But what could be worse than having a monster for a son? Could I really make it worse by being a cowardly monster?

Above all, I was afraid. I had seen burnings before, when I was young, and I had cried for the people on the stakes. I had cried until my family had ushered me inside and then late into the night. It was so terrible, to die in such pain, such shame, such humiliation. I was afraid of dying like that, with all those faces laughing at me while I screamed in pain. And Treize would be long gone by then. Did he even know? Would he even care that he was leaving me to such a fate? I wasn't sure. He seemed to be a good man and I was even starting to find I enjoyed his company, but I knew that he would leave me. I was a sorcerer and someone as powerful as he could not be associated with the scum of the earth. I did not choose to be a sorcerer, but I was and that was all there was to it.

And suddenly, I found myself crying. It was too much, fate had dealt me too much and I simply couldn't take it. Treize had said I was not alone, but would he be able to tolerate me when I showed him how weak I was? I doubted it, he would probably walk away in disgust.

Which is why I was so surprised when he sat down on the bed beside me, pulling me into his arms and rubbing my back gently.

"What's the matter?" he asked me quietly. I had no intentions of furthering my disgrace by answering, but my voice betrayed me.

"Don't leave me," I whispered, surprised and ashamed of myself, "I don't want to be burned," I said, then bit my lips and forced myself to shut up.

There was a startled gasp from Treize and I looked up to see shock written across his face. So he hadn't known I would be killed.

"What? Wufei, how could you think that I would leave you here? What kind of a monster do you think I am? You are coming to Haven with me, it's already been arranged. I thought you would have realized... but I guess I was wrong. You have nothing to fear, Wufei, I said I would protect you and I am a man of my word. I will let no harm come to you."

"But," I said, my voice betraying me again, "I'm a sorcerer... you can't possibly take me with you..."

Treize leaned in close and whispered his next words into my ear, "In my country, it is not a crime to be a sorcerer. You have nothing to fear. Now, sleep."

It was almost beyond my comprehension, what he was saying. How could there be a place where sorcerers were not hated and killed? How could it be possible. But... still... his words, just the fact that he knew what he was doing and had control of the situation that was so far beyond my help, made me feel better and I relaxed my hold on consciousness. In seconds I was sound asleep and oblivious to the world. I trusted Treize to take care of me.

It wasn't long before I was awakened again. This time, though, it was Treize shaking me that brought me out of my slumber.

"Wake up, Wufei, the healer is here," he told me, pulling me into a sitting position. As I fought to focus my eyes, I found the healer that had been called was the same one that had given me the drugs when I was first given to Treize. He didn't seem nearly as unhappy as he had when I had first seen him, but he still didn't seem pleased.

The healer instantly set to work, taking my pulse and putting a thermometer into my mouth. But I was so tired, I could barely hold my head up. A few times I almost fell asleep and the thermometer fell out of my mouth. The second time Treize had to return it, he threatened me.

"You know, Wufei, if you can't hold this in your mouth we'll have to stick it somewhere less pleasant."

I glared at him, but made sure not to doze off until the thermometer was removed. Actually, I didn't doze off for the rest of the appointment, just to be safe.

I was amazed by how little respect the healer had for Treize, who was obviously a very powerful man. Instead of showing respect, the healer ordered him around like some kind of aid, fetching towels and rags and bottles. I was also amazed at how used to that kind of treatment Treize seemed. Any other noble would have been raving mad, but Treize didn't seem to mind at all.

"He will need to be bathed any time his temperature rises above 104 degrees," the healer finally concluded, "I will leave you with a syrup that should help calm his fever and put him to sleep. Give him one spoonful every hour until the fever breaks, then one spoonful a day for a week. Other than that he needs kept cool and to rest. We can only wait for the fever to break. You should bathe him now, I need to see to another patient. You may call one of the servants to bathe him for you," the healer said, packing his things.

"I will do it," Treize said, moving to the side of my bed and pulling back the lone cover I had been allowed. The healer paused in his packing, then frowned deeply.

"I don't know why you're bothering to save him. He's a sorcerer, after all. He should be killed," the healer spat finally, then returned to his packing with a vengeance. Treize deliberated over his reply until the healer was finished packing. His words seemed to strike something in the healer.

"Sorcerer he may be, but he is still a person. He does not deserve to be treated like a criminal for something he had no control over."

The healer paused, his hand reaching for the door knob. He simply stood there for a minute, like he was uncertain of what to do. Finally, he turned back to Treize, his eyes sad.

"It is said that in your country sorcerers are not hated or prosecuted. My name is Ottokiski Ki, my brother was... is Ottokiski Oko. He was a sorcerer. For many years I watched him fight those powers inside him, ever losing the battle. I grew angry at him, saying he was tempting the dark arts and trying to bring ruin down upon our family. We had a fight and I told him that if he practiced the dark arts again I would tell the emperor of his magic. The next morning I went to his room only to find that it had been burned, as though his powers had once again gotten out of hand. There was a note on the dresser saying that he could no longer disgrace our family and he was severing all ties. Saying that he was going to try and find a new life in you country," the healer's voice broke and there were tears in his eyes as he reached into his bag and pulled out a small parcel, "Please, if you ever see my brother, could you give this to him? And, please, tell him I'm sorry and I want him to come home."

Treize took the package with a solemn face, setting it on the dresser before putting a hand on the healer's shoulder.

"Your brother is a very good friend of mine. I don't know if he will return to you or not, but I know that he misses you dearly and will be happy to hear from you. I did not recognize the name at first, he prefers to be called Master O, but I will give him you message."

A smile broke out on the healer's face, "He always hated the name Oko. Thank you. Thank you for everything."

The healer dried his eyes, taking a deep breath before stepping toward the door again.

"Take care of that boy," he called to Treize and I assumed he meant me. I was a little insulted that he would think I needed taken care of, but kept my mouth shut.

"I will," Treize said before the healer closed the door and was gone. Treize then turned to me with a smile. "Well, how about that bath?"

I groaned. The last thing I wanted to do was eave my comfy bed for a cold bath, but I doubted I had any choice. Treize had promised to take care of me and he would, whether I liked it or not.

By the time the bath was over, I was cold, shivering, and exhausted, but Treize seemed pleased that my temperature had dropped to 101. When Treize put me back in bed, since I was still too weak to walk, I wanted nothing more than to sleep forever.

"I think we're forgetting something, little dragon," Treize told me. I looked up to see him holding a spoonful of thick, red liquid. I opened my mouth, having decided to take it and get it out of the way so I could go back to sleep. I didn't, however, know that it would taste so awful. I choked and nearly gagged on the stuff. Treize was holding a glass of water to my lips as I struggled to get the foul medicine down and I drank the water gratefully, trying to get that taste out of my mouth.

"Sorry," Treize said with a rueful smile while he took my glass away, "He warned me it would taste bad, but I didn't think it would be that bad. Get some sleep, we leave in a few hours."

I must have fallen asleep, because my memories become disjointed after that. It was like I was only seeing parts of a story and missing most of what happened. I remember someone sitting me up and giving me that awful medication again. I remember being in the bath again, shivering as Treize ran the washcloth over me. I remember being in bed, fully dried and dressed. I remember waking up to Treize's touch but knowing that I had already had my medicine, though I couldn't remember taking it. I remember throwing up in the toilet, though I couldn't remember how I got there or when I had eaten. I remembered Treize's voice saying he would have to leave me and I would meet him later, but I couldn't see his face.

When I finally fully awoke again, I was alone in the room. I was groggy and slow, still weak from the fever raging through me. I knew that something had awakened me, though I didn't know what. In the next instant the door opened and I realized that someone must have knocked, waking me.

"Is this him?" a tall, male servant asked. A female servant, the one that had taken me into the rain, trailed him in and nodded.

"Yeah, that's him. Lord Treize says he'll need carried down to the carriage, he's too weak to walk. I think he's faking, but that's just me," the girl said with a sneer.

"Better to do as his lordship says, even if he isn't sick," the boy said and I was relieved. I had thought he might have forced me to walk to the carriage myself. I wasn't sure I could.

The girl shrugged and left the room with a disdainful air. The boy simply shook his head and walked over to the bed. As he got closer, I could see that he was strong, though not particularly heavy, and well muscled. He didn't seem as sour as the girl and there was even a smile on his face.

"What a crock," he said, though I wasn't certain if he was talking to me or himself, "you couldn't walk if you wanted to, you wouldn't make it to the door. It's because of her attitude she stays in the kitchen, she's always bitching about something," the boy muttered and I almost smiled. At least I wasn't the only one that disliked her. "Man," the boy said, putting a hand on my head, "You're burning up. Better leave the blanket on, it's a bit cold outside."

Then, without further ado, the boy picked me and the blanket up in his arms and carried me out the door. It wasn't far to the carriage, but I was sweating and shivering by the time we got there. The boy climbed into the carriage and propped me against the side of the car, pulling the blanket tighter around me. Then he went out of the carriage and left me alone. After a few minutes, the boy returned with a glass of water.

"Here," he said, holding the glass to my lips, "I don't want you fainting on me or anything."

I drank some of the water, then turned my head away, signaling that I couldn't drink anymore. The boy took the glass away and just sat there in with me, sometimes humming, sometimes talking. It seemed like a long time before I heard the sounds of footsteps, but I couldn't quite let myself go enough for sleep without Treize around.

The boy left the carriage and I heard him talking with a voice I instantly recognized as Treize's a second later.

"My Lord, that boy is sick. You should really have a healer look at him or he could..."

"I've already had the healer to see him, but thank you for your concern. Did you stay with him this whole time?" Treize asked.

"Yes, sir. It didn't seem like a good idea to leave someone so sick all by himself."

"I thank you. I was a bit worried about Wufei, but I see I had nothing to worry about. Let me offer you a token of my gratitude."

There was the sounds of coins jingling and the boy let out a startled, "I can't accept that!"

"I insist," replied Treize, "I'll be insulted if you don't," he said, keeping his tone serious though I could hear the smiling undertone. What was the boy to do? He couldn't possibly refuse Treize's gift now and I'm not so sure he had wanted to in the first place. He said an awed, "Thank you sir," before I heard the patter of running feet.

In the next moment, Treize pulled himself into the carriage and sat beside me, automatically pulling me to lean on him.

"Are you ready to go, dragon?" he asked me. I think I may have mumbled a response, but I'm not sure. All I knew was I was so very tired and Treize was soft, warm, and safe. As the horses started forward and we started down the path to strange lands and my new home, I was already asleep.


	32. Wufei31

Wufei POV

I know I must have missed something, because the next time I awoke I was completely naked and being put into a bathtub full of cool water by Treize and a man I had never seen before.

"What the hell? Kisama! Let me go you bastards!" I ranted as the two held me in the tub.

"Of course he would wake up now," the strange man drawled unhappily.

"Wufei! Calm down, no one is going to hurt you!" Treize barked and I stopped fighting against the two. "You can go now, Orin. Tell the cook to send some broth up with one of the crew and then get some sleep. I think I'll be able to handle him by myself from here on out."

The man, Orin, let go of me and backed away with a frown on his face.

"You call me if he starts wigging out again," Orin said seriously as he left the room. I relaxed against the tub as soon as the door had shut behind him, my mind overfilled with questions.

"What the hell is going on, Treize?" I asked harshly. Treize set to work cooling me with a washcloth before answering with a question of his own.

"How much do you remember?"

"I remember that boy taking me to the carriage, then you arriving. Before that it's a little fuzzy, and after that there's nothing."

Treize sighed as he continued to rub the cool water up and down my arms.

"The rain held our carriage up yesterday, so we were late getting to my ship. Stupid means of transportation, I should have just flown us to the ship in the first place, but I couldn't fly in the rain with you in that thin blanket, so we had to wait. Your medicine was in one of the carriages that didn't get stuck in the mud and you missed a dose. After that your fever skyrocketed. This is your fourth bath today. You began having nightmares and fought against me, I had to call Orin to help hold you down and get you to take your medicine. You haven't been able to keep anything other than that down and your voice was becoming sore from screaming. They must have been horrible nightmares. Do you want to talk about them?" he asked. I wracked my brain, but couldn't come up with more than a handful of images I had seen in my sleep, all of them gruesome but seemingly unconnected to a dream.

"I really don't remember having any nightmares," I told him. Treize nodded and seemed to understand.

"I'm not surprised, your fever was extremely high and that medicine you were given is a rather potent brew. Come on," he said, lifting me from the tub, "let's get you dried and into bed."

"What time is it?" I asked as Treize helped me into bed.

"Nearly three in the morning," he replied, tucking me in and giving me another spoonful of that loathsome medicine. "Once your fever breaks you'll only have to take it once a day," Treize soothed, smiling as I made a face, "Now get some sleep, dragon, it's late."

"Why d'you call me that?" I asked, the medicine already starting to kick in.

"What? Dragon? Oh, I don't know, it just seemed to fit."

"M' grandfather called me that. He said there was a dragon sleeping under our castle and I was one of its descendants... but he's dead now..."

"Wufei, what do you mean, a dragon under your castle? Wufei?" Treize asked, but I was already too far gone to answer. In another second, I was asleep.

The next time I awoke, Treize was gone and that man, Orin, was sitting next to my bed.

"So, you're awake," he said with a smile, "You had us worried there for a while, you've slept all day with your fever going up and down. We thought you weren't going to wake up. Treize just about had a heart attack. So how are you feeling?"

"Fine," I replied without really thinking about it. Orin gave a bark of harsh laughter.

"Well, you look like shit. Speaking of shit, it's about time you took your medicine," he said, getting up and retrieving the bottle. Though I didn't like his analogy, I couldn't help but see the similarities between that horrible concoction and shit. As I took it, I actually wondered if eating shit wouldn't taste better.

"So," he said after the medicine was in me, "how did someone like you end up with Treize?" he asked, seemingly unconcerned with the rudeness of prying into other people's affairs. Eventually, I forced myself to answer him.

"I was given to lord Treize by the emperor. I am his slave and Treize is my master," I told him gravely. Orin laughed hard and I looked at him in astonishment.

"Well," he said after his laughter had calmed a bit, "Aren't you a lucky devil?"

"And just what is so lucky about being someone's slave?" I ground out.

"What? Can't you see it? Not only is Treize a king and a great person, he's head over heels for you!"

"What?" I asked him. I didn't understand. Sure Treize showed me some affection, but most of it came out of pity, not love.

"Man, you really didn't see it! What, do you think he'd sit by your bed this whole time because there's no one else to do it? We nearly had to beat him to death to get him out of the room to eat something, and I bet he'll be back any..."

The door opened.

"...second. Well, it's good to see you back without the growling belly sir, though I doubt any of the crew members have ever seen you eat so fast."

"The members of this crew, though talented as they are, are not worried about manners in the least. You yourself are the spitting image of rudeness, harassing this poor boy while he is sick and unable to call for help."

"Sir, I do believe I am insulted that you would think such a thing. The boy and I were just sitting here discussing your love life when..."

"What!"

Orin started laughing and, I must say, I was unable to squelch a few laughs myself. I had seen the playful side of Treize several times before, but never so strongly or easily had he shown it. It was nice to see him being so relaxed and playful.

But, in the back of my mind, I was still worrying the thought that Treize was attracted to me. I had never thought of him that way before, at least, not passed thinking that at least the man that was to use me for sex wasn't fat and ugly.

I had never really known love before, not real love anyway. Even the love I had for my wife was platonic, not in any sexual way. So, I wasn't really sure whether I was falling for Treize, or if his falling for me was something to be concerned about. He had shown himself to be an honorable man and he had already promised not to take me, at least without my consent. All I really knew was that I could envision staying with Treize, talking with him like we had and sparring with him more. When I tried to envision myself without him... there was only emptiness. Loneliness. I didn't want to be alone.

Treize fed me some broth, took my temperature, and told me to sleep. I rested, but couldn't quite get to sleep until Treize, grudgingly, joined me to take his own nap a few minutes later. I could tell that he wasn't in the least bit tired, since it was still pretty early in the evening, but I was a little anxious about being in such a weak condition in such a new place and I wanted the safety that his arms made me feel. I instantly curled up in his arms and let my fever and the medicine take me away into what I hope would be a fitful sleep. What I hoped and what was were two very different things.

That night I had one of the most vivid and horrifying dreams I've ever had. It started out with the attack of my castle and the deaths of my family, a dream that I have lived through hundreds of times, but it continued passed where it had stopped before. It showed the ghosts of my family walking the Earth forever. Merian showed up, the gaping hole still in her stomach where they had sliced through her armor, and screamed at me to avenge them, calling me a coward and a traitor. I tried to tell her that I was doing everything I could and I would avenge her, but she just kept screaming and crying. Then she faded away and a tall man walked passed me into our castle. He was covered in shadows and I could not see him well, but there was no mistaking the aura of evil about him. He walked down into the dungeon and through a secret wall into what looked to be an ancient shrine. I rushed to get inside and see what he was doing, but in the next instant, the door shut and I was locked out. In the next minute, that castle began to shake and the floor cracked and broke open, allowing a huge dragon to rear its head. In my dream, the dragon flew out of the earth and burned every living thing on the planet.

I woke up screaming.

"Wufei! Wufei, it was just a dream! Just a dream, it's alright. You were having a nightmare," Treize soothed, pulling me into his arms. "You're fever spiked for a bit there, but it's finally broken. You had only been in fever-less sleep a few hours when this nightmare started, but I didn't want to wake you from the only real rest you've had in two days. Are you alright? Do you want to talk about it?"

And I couldn't seem to stop myself. I poured out the whole, horrible nightmare in all it's gory detail. Treize listened intently, never uttering a word until I was finished speaking. Still, even though he didn't say anything, talking about the nightmare and being wrapped in his arms helped me to stop shivering and calmed me. It was like I was relieving just a little bit of the tension that threatened to tear me apart.

"Wufei," Treize asked after we had sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments, "Was there really a legend about a dragon sleeping under your castle?"

"Mm-hm. My grandfather often told me that it had been sealed under the castle by an evil sorcerer and my family was chosen to protect it until it awakened. I looked for it often as a child, but only ever saw wild dragons."

"There were wild dragons near your home?"

"Oh yes, the wild dragons would often nest in the mountains just above our castle, but they never came close enough to hurt anyone."

"Where did you live? Where was your castle located?"

"Closer to the ocean than we are now. It was up, above Mongolia and bordering with Russia. It's northeast of the imperial palace, but I'm not sure where it is from here."

"And you said it bordered with Russia?"

"Yes, why? What are you thinking?"

"Nothing. I'm not sure yet but..."

"But what?"

"But I think that our enemies are one in the same, and I think that they might have shown themselves too early in the game. You must tell me about how your family was killed today," he paused and smiled kindly at the anxious look on my face, "But not right now. Let's get some breakfast, then we can talk. I think it would be better to get you a bit more comfortable in your surroundings before I bombard you with questions. Come on, shower and get dressed and it should be time for breakfast."

So I got up and washed, feeling much better after my shower, but had to rest once I was dressed. I was amazed at how little strength I had and how much simple things taxed me. Treize had to help me to the galley for breakfast and I had to have a nap after that.

I was a little anxious about talking to Treize about my family, but, oddly, not as worried as I should have been. I had been through so much with Treize, I had told him so much about myself, that I wasn't really worried. Even after the way Treize had used our link to force me to tell him my family had died, he had only forced me to tell him the minimal he needed to know, and he had asked me countless times to tell him what had happened. Though, I must admit, the thing that most made forgive him was the undeniable feelings of regret and sorry I got from him before he forced me to sleep. I know that he didn't want to hurt me, and I was used to "tough love" from my own family, who had been very strict in my upbringing.

So, when Treize woke me and lead me out onto a balcony so we could talk in private, I had no qualms about telling him all that I knew. Treize started out easy, asking me questions of happier times. I answered him, but my answers were short and to the point, I wanted to get to the hard part and get it over with. Eventually, he asked me the question I had been waiting for.

"What happened to your family?"

"Everything happened quickly," I said, the memories surfacing almost of their own will. I had kept them bottled up for too long, they would be reckoned with now. "A strange ship sailed up the river late in the night. We assumed it was a Mongolian fishing boat, but set extra watches just to be safe. It wasn't the right season for sea fishing, and the winter cold would freeze the river if the boat tried to go for trading purposes. I knew something was off about it, I _knew_, but I thought I was just being suspicious and didn't say anything.

"The next morning... The next morning there was a group of almost a hundred men outside the castle walls. I sneered at them. I had over two hundred warriors, an endless supply of weapons, and a castle that could take a siege of more than three years. There were just under six hundred people behind that castle wall, all of them distantly related to me and ready to defend their home with their lives. I didn't take such a small fighting force seriously.

"My wife knew better. She had always had a mind for battle and, while I was more interested in books, she would read of old battle and talk with the wise men of their younger battles. She knew something was wrong and she tried to tell me not to be so rash, but I wouldn't listen. I wanted to make those men pay for daring to threaten my family and home, so I sent out all of my warriors to fight them.

"I was wounded early in the battle," absently I ran my hand across the scar on my stomach. Treize saw my action and seemed to realize what wound I was talking about, because he nodded in understanding. "I would have continued fighting, but one of my soldiers, against my harsh words otherwise, took me back to the shelter of the castle to be treated. It was only after the soldier had left that I saw the bandana wrapped around my hand and realized the soldier who forced me back had been my wife, whom I had commanded not to fight. She never did listen to me. She was, after all, one of the best fighters we had. I was three years older than her when we were married, so I easily overpowered her by sheer size and skill, but she continued to grow as a warrior until she was any man's rival, even mine.

"Hours passed and some of the warriors returned, exhausted. Other, older and younger warriors went out to replace them, but I knew that we were in a bad position then. There was no reason we should have been defeated, not in a two to one battle. The men that returned reported that several of my warriors had already died, and no matter how many of the enemy they killed they never seemed to make a dent in their numbers. It was like they couldn't be killed.

"It was the same story all through the night. No matter how many died, there never seemed to be any less of them. The replacements of my warriors tired and replacements went out for them. Some trainee warriors, some long retired warriors, and even some of the skilled women warriors went out, but nothing changed. More and more warriors went out and didn't return. Eventually, I was forced to call my warriors to retreat and we closed all entrances into the castle.

"The enemies tried to scale the walls, but I had workers and warriors on top of the walls to pour hot oil on them and kill any who made it to the top. I thought we had beaten them and they would leave. And, for a time, it did seem like we had stopped them. There weren't any less of them, but none of them managed to make it up the wall. They didn't show any signs of giving up, though, they only seemed to get angrier. They seemed to be waiting for something, impatiently waiting. After a while they started throwing the limbs of our dead over the walls, making rudimentary catapults and throwing whole bodies over. I had come up onto the wall to see the damage when they threw Merian's body. Her head landed at my feet, her naked body fell just behind me, a hole the size of my fist through her stomach and crude words cut across her breasts.

"I... They say I went insane. I tried to jump off the wall, which stood twenty feet high, in my rage to get at Merian's killers. Someone told me that I had to be restrained and locked in my room for an hour. I don't remember. All I remember is seeing... seeing that and then waking up in my room. I called for a servant. They told me what had happened... leaving out the part about Merian. I put it out of my mind, buried it farther than my mind would go so that I could go out and do my duty, keep my family safe.

"I went back to the wall. I forced myself to, I had to see what was happening on the battle field so I could lead my people. When I got there, a strange man had entered the field. He wore a dark cape so that no one could see him, but it was easy to tell from the way he walked that he was the leader. He walked up to the wall and put his hand on it and stood perfectly still for a moment. His troops gathered around him in a semi-circle, waiting their commands. A minute later, he walked away form the wall, pointing at the spot he had stood while talking to one of his troops. About twenty troops lined up at the spot he had pointed to and pushed.

"I couldn't believe my eyes. They pushed the wall down. Twenty feet high and six feet thick, and they pushed a chunk of it to the ground with their bare hands.

"After that it was pandemonium. The enemy was inside the castle, killing everyone they saw. They left no chance for surrender. They even blocked the exits, leaving no chance for escape. Some of my relative managed to overpower me and hid me, on of my cousins had them take me to a secret tunnel that led miles away from our castle. He gave me the key to the massive door that blocked the tunnel entrance and made me promise go get help.

"I should have died. I should have fought beside my brethren and been killed honorably in battle, instead of running like a coward. But I did run. I ran for a day before I could managed to get a horse. After that I don't know how many days I rode before I reached the closest castle for help. The master of the castle had been a friend of my family and immediately sent men to help my family. I wanted to go, but my wound was infected and the lord of the castle insisted I stay and rest. When the men returned, they were grim. There was no one left alive at the castle and the enemy warriors were long gone.

"From there I was sent to the emperor to seek his help in exacting revenge for my family, but there was no way to tell who the warriors that attacked us were. I was put into service in the imperial library while the emperor's advisors tried to find away to help me exact my revenge and et me out of their hair. When I was charged with sorcery, my family's castle and all their belongings returned to the emperor and you know what happened from there.

"I don't... I don't know how I will avenge my family. I don't even know who my enemy is! Damn them! Damn them all to hell!" I raged, smashing my fist against the wall. Silently, Treize came up to me and put a hand on my cheek.

"Wufei," he called quietly, wiping a tear away with his thumb, "Do you even realize you've been crying for some time now? Let go, dragon, let it go. You're enemy will reveal himself, give it time. You aren't alone anymore. I'll help you, but you need to let go of this anger that's eating you alive."

"I can't," I heard myself whisper hoarsely.

And then I broke. My tears streamed down my face as I launched myself into Treize's waiting arms. He pulled me down to sit on the floor as I sobbed hysterically in his lap, holding me and crooning to me like a child. And I let him. I needed him, needed to know there was someone who still cared about more than I needed any damn pride. I needed his love.

And that thought alone brought me to a startling conclusion. Never had I let anyone see me in such a weakened state before, never had I trusted someone so much. Was it possible that I loved him? Could I give my heart to this man?

"Treize," I called, fighting to pause my sobs, "Do... do you love me?" I asked. He froze for a second, then tightened his hold in certainty.

"Yes, dragon, I do," he said. That was all I needed and I buried my head back in his chest, allowing my tears to continue leaking out. "Wufei, do you...?"

"What?"

"Do you return the affection?"

"I... I don't know," I told him honestly, a little afraid of telling him the truth that my heart was already telling me.

"But... maybe?" he asked, his voice on the edge of hope and despair and I belatedly realized that he was asking me if I could ever love him. I realized that if I turned him away, it would hurt him and I didn't want to do that.

"Yeah... maybe," I replied cautiously and saw him smile, "I'm not really sure. Even with my wife, it was never real love. I saw her as a sister. When we failed to produce an heir, some people started spreading rumors that I was more attracted to the boys than the girls, but it wasn't really either. I've always seen the beauty of both sexes, male and female. So, yeah, I think I could love you."

"That's all I need. To know that there's hope," he told me, smiling, I smiled at him for a minute, but then my smile crumbled.

"What am I going to do? How can I avenge my family if I can't even find their killers?"

Treize frowned, but there was a look in his eyes that told me he knew something and he wasn't telling me what.

"Tell me how it was found that you are a sorcerer," Treize asked. I gave him a look.

"Why? What aren't you telling me?"

"It's just the suspicion of an overcautious mind. Now, you tell me about your arrest and I'll tell you my suspicion. After all, I asked first," he said, a playful smile on his face while his eyes remained serious. I made a face, but told him. After all, I had told him everything else.

"It was the strangest thing. I was working in the library of the imperial palace when a man walked in. There was quite a commotion because it was one of the emperor's advisors. I was busy at the time, but I let my curiosity get the best of me and went to have a look at him. I was only there for a second, but the instant Noventa saw me he pointed and shouted, "Sorcerer!" I was shocked and terrified. I simply stood there, too stunned to move, as guards came up behind Noventa and went to arrest me. The librarian came forward to defend me, saying that I was an honorable man and a hard worker. I know that my help saved him from many a sleepless night while working in the library, but I was still grateful he would defend me. They argued for a time, then Noventa pulled out a small bag of red chalk and smeared it across my forehead. I felt something tingle and then it started going read as fire right on my forehead. After that there was nothing anyone could do to defend me and they dragged me off to the dungeon."

A few seconds passed before I heard a sound coming from Treize that I didn't recognize at first. When it came again, I almost couldn't believe it. Treize was laughing!

"What's so damn funny?" I growled at him. He turned to me with a strange glimmer in his eye.

"I do believe we've found our enemy and, more than that, we know what he doesn't."

"I don't understand."

"Your powers aren't even refined enough to start candles, there's no way you could have possible caused that chalk to glow. Only another, more powerful sorcerer could have done it."

It was a second before what he was saying really donned on me. I was shocked.

"Noventa's a sorcerer!" I gasped. Treize nodded in assent.

"That, or he's in league with one. It's more likely that he's the sorcerer, though, because magic is hard to control over distances."

"But... why?"

"Do you know why I'm here Wufei? Why I made this trip?"

"I assumed it was a normal political trip."

"There was a tame dragon found in my country. It was stolen, we think the person who stole it might be trying to use the dragons to take of my country."

"Stole a dragon? But who would do such a thing? And what does that have to do with me?"

"Hang on dragon, I'm getting to that. The dragon was found by a special group of my agents and we believe that our enemy's operative was killed. However, we believe that the man who orchestrated this action is still at large and may be finding other ways of obtaining and using the dragons for war. If your castle is all you say it is, it would be the perfect place to launch an attack on Russia. Further more, with all the dragons around our enemy could possibly use them to his advantage."

"But what does that have to do with Noventa declaring me a sorcerer? My family was already dead, the men could have taken that castle if they wanted it."

"Yes, but that would have been suspicious. Instead, it would have been better to kill your family then send a distress signal or simply wait for someone to see the castle and report the carnage. Someone would have been sent but ultimately, with no one left to claim the castle, it would have been given to the emperor. He, having no use for it, could award it to, oh say, one of his advisors."

"Noventa!"

"Exactly. However, you managed to foil his plan by surviving. The only way to get the castle away from you without revealing himself was to..."

"Declare me a sorcerer! That bastard! I'll kill him!"

"Not yet, Wufei, but soon. Tomorrow we will arrive at Haven and begin to plan our course of action. However, I promise you, Wufei, that you will have your revenge."


	33. Duo32

Duo POV

I won't say I was happy to see them go. I mean, really, what kind of friend would I be? But it felt nice to know that I would finally have some time to spend with Heero. Not to say that Treize and Quatre weren't great, it was just that they watched me with this weird little shit-eating smirk every time I was around Heero, like they were betting on how soon I'd score with him.

Which was something else that bothered me. Not since that little incident at Haven, which only lasted thirty seconds so really can't be considered an incident, had Heero shown any hint at all of being physically attracted to me. I knew by our link that he loved me, but what if he wasn't attracted to me? How could my super manly studliness fail me at such a critical moment? Was it the hair? The eyes? What? Why wasn't Heero jumping at me like a rabid dog?

Okay, maybe I was overdoing it just a little, but the fact was that I was about to jump at _him_ like a rabid dog and the thought that he was not at all attracted to me was somewhat off-putting. Though, in all fairness, I really couldn't say that I'd seen him attracted to girls any more than me, so maybe he just wasn't interested in sex.

I shudder at the thought, but it was possible. Maybe what Dekim and Barton did to him cured him of sex forever. That was definitely going to be a problem, since I was most certainly _not_ cured of sex and I wasn't really sure how much longer I could hold out against my raging hormones. The last thing I wanted to do was scare Heero, but, let's face it, there's only so much one man can take. And seeing Heero naked in the shower was about my limit.

Not to say that I didn't do my best to tempt him without revealing to him that I wanted to throw him down on the bed and ravage him. The things I did still make me blush, but I did manage to stop short of saying, "Heero, what do you want for dinner? Do you think I'm sexy? Do you want me for dinner?"

I might have thought it, but I didn't say it.

I was not, however, able to stop myself from insinuating things about the hairbrush while Heero brushed my hair. Or insinuating other things we could do with the oil when he oiled my wings. Or insinuating other places I could rub when I gave him a back massage. He, fortunately or unfortunately, did not pick up on any of these hints. It drove me crazy!

Now, you have to understand where I was coming from. Heero had a great body. It was a little undernourished when we first arrived, but I kept on him about eating and he steadily gained weight. I made Heero relax for a few days, then we started his training four days before Quatre and Treize left. I was shocked to find that, even as sick as he had been, Heero was only five pounds under my lifting weight.

Heero liked to work out. I could tell from the first time I took him to the castle's gym. He was like a cat in a ray of sunlight, he just seemed perfectly content. He seemed to literally enjoy working his body to its hardest. I scolded him a few times about pushing himself to hard, but otherwise left him go. It was good for him, after all.

It just didn't help my libido any that I had to stand over a sweaty, shirtless man with the most gorgeous body I had ever seen all day and do nothing about it. I couldn't even make lewd jokes, since Heero either wouldn't understand them or wouldn't like them.

By the time Treize and Quatre left on their trips, Heero was about ready to take Une's test and I was about ready to lose my mind. I actually talked to Sally about libido reducing drugs for me, but she started asking me questions and I decided it was better to just give up and run for it.

By the time Heero went for Une's test, I was in a pretty depressed mood, but I put it aside to support Heero, since I knew he was going to need it.

Une is nothing if not a harsh drill master, and from the way she grilled Heero one would think that she disliked him, but it was actually a bit of the opposite. Une values the lives of her soldiers above all else, and she hates to risk her troops in anything, so she overtrains them in order to prepare them for any task. The job that I, and now Heero, took on was one of the most taxing and chaotic jobs out there, you never knew what you were going to come up against. So she grilled Heero in a course that even I would have been hard pressed to finish.

There was never a doubt in my mind that Heero could finish it, and he didn't disappoint. Sweaty and exhausted as he was, he finished the course and actually earned an approving smile from Une, something that wasn't seen often. Of course, it didn't bode very well when he collapsed the second we were out of sight of the lady, but I figured he had passed the test either way and didn't say anything about it.

I went up to our room and laid Heero on the bed, deciding it was best to let him sleep for a while and regain his strength. I grabbed a book and laid down beside him, but I unfortunately picked a book titled, "The history and genealogy of trees" and I was soon fast asleep too.

I woke up to Heero moaning. It wasn't an unusual thing, since I often woke to his nightmares, but there was an odd sense about this one. He wasn't thrashing as hard as he usually did and something sounded a bit off about his moan.

I should have looked through our mind link to find the problem and saved us both some trouble, but my sleep-muddled mind didn't even peak at Heero's so I just did what felt natural. I just curled closer to Heero, wrapping my arms around him, and tried to wake him without startling him. I pulled him close to try and comfort him and only then noticed something about him.

Heero was sporting wood.

It relieved me a bit, since I had actually worried that, due to Dr. J's work, he might not be physically able to get an erection. However, after a second I noticed the precarious position I was in.

Heero, with the hard-on of a lifetime, was pressed against my chest moaning about someone who was not necessarily me.

"Duo?" I heard softly and just about choked on my heart. Heero was awake and I was in a position that, to the person just waking up, would look like I was about to take advantage of him. A hundred different explanation sifted through my mind, but I was frozen and none of them popped out of my mouth.

"Duo?" Heero called again, his voice heavy with pleasure and laced with apprehension, "What's going on?"

I realized that I was probably scaring him, gaping like I was, and tried to make my voice work, but couldn't. I tried to move away from him, but my body wouldn't react.

"Duo? Duo, what's wrong?" Heero asked, his voice showing the edges of panic, "Why do I- Mmm! Why... do I feel... like this? What's h-happening to me? I feel so-so str- Ah! Ohhmm!" he cried arching off the bed. I was so enwrapped in watching him that I almost missed the significance of what Heero was saying. When I did, I was unfrozen and filled with a sense of disbelief.

"Heero, are you telling me you've never had a hard-on before?" I asked him. He managed to open his eyes and look at me, sort of relieved and annoyed at the same time.

"A what?"

"A hard-on. You know, sporting wood?"

"Oh. I've sported wood before. I had to chop and carry it at Wing. I don't see the relevance to this- Nnn! T-this feeling," he said, giving me a small, annoyed glare. I would have laughed, had it not been for the enormity of the situation. Heero was over sixteen and had never had a wet dream? It wasn't possible, was it?

"I mean, you've never had an erection before," I told him, trying to get him to understand and deny it.

"An erect what?" he asked me, giving me a full-fledged glare.

"An erection. It's when... It's when y-your penis... umm... goes up..."

"It does that?" he asked and I gawked in amazement.

"You've never had that happen before?" I asked one last time.

"No."

"Up. Get up, we're going to see Sally."

"Why, are you sick?"

"No, no, not me."

"You mean that thing that just happened to me? There's no sense going now, it's gone already."

I actually did laugh that time. It was going to be a long night. Grabbing Heero's hand, I dragged the silent and sullen boy down the halls to Sally's room.

"Everything checked out normal, Duo," Sally told me, an hour and a half later in her office. Heero was glaring at me angrily, so whatever Sally did when she ordered me out of the room must not have been fun. I'd have to kiss-up later and try to make amends.

"There is nothing ordinary about this, Sally. It's not normal for a boy to go without having..."

"Duo, could I talk to you alone?" Sally asked, interrupting me in a voice that meant shut up before I shut you up. I sighed, I didn't want to treat Heero like some kind of kid, but Sally knew more about people than me so I decided to go with her wishes.

"Heero, could you wait outside?" I asked. Heero glared harder, but got up and walked out of the room. The instant he was out of the room, you could see Sally's patience snap.

"What the hell was that? You make me give him an entire physical over erectile dysfunction? What were you thinking? You just about gave Heero a panic attack over nothing! This is all because you can't score, isn't it? Well ha! I'm glad you can't score, the discipline will be good for you!

"Sally! You know I'm not here just because Heero hasn't had sex with me!" Sally seemed to calm a bit at my anger. Her eye went soft and a bit regretful and her shoulders slumped. She put her hand up and rubbed her forehead.

"I'm sorry Duo. It's been a long day, I had five people come in from a logging accident. I had to amputate the arm of a little girl, and the little boy didn't survive at all. It's just... It's just been a hard day."

I got up and hugged her. There were bags under her eyes and I could tell from the tension in her shoulders that she had been upset very badly by losing that little boy. She needed the support of a friend but, more than that, she needed her lover.

"I'm sorry Duo, I should never have said that," she told me after a while, "I know you're just worried about him. It's the same way with my love, always worrying over me. It drives me crazy sometimes, but it also makes me feel very precious. I know Heero might be mad now, but he's also grateful that you care about him so much.

"Now, about the exam," Sally said, her voice changing as she moved into business, "I'm going to tell you this once and only once. Heero is fine. He has actually gained a startling amount of health since I first examined him back at Wing. The fact that he had an erection is a good sign. It may not be normal for the first erection to come at his age, but it is not something to worry about.

"You have to understand. When Heero was growing up he was barely given enough nutrients to stay alive. His body didn't have the energy to worry about things like hormones and reproduction, it just wanted to stay alive. Now that he' healthy, his body can start going through changes that would have normally happened a while ago."

"But... how do I explain these things? I mean, Heero didn't even know what an erection was."

"Well... the best idea might be to take it as it comes. Answer any questions he has but, I'm warning you Duo, don't have sex until you know he's solid in his sexuality and ready for sex. You don't want to start him off too early and you don't want to scare him. You may have to... guide him a bit, but don't do anything inappropriate. And for the love of god, don't instigate! It might be weeks before he has another, just be patient. Now, get out of my office, I have to tidy up."

"Shouldn't you go to bed?"

"No, I have to," she paused to yawn, "I have to finish up some blood tests here. You go on, I'll be fine."

I left the room and came face to face with a very angry looking Heero. Seriously, if I didn't have our link to know that he wasn't about to kill me, I would have run back into Sally's office and shut the door. As I was I could see that he was on the line between yelling at me and decking me. He took in a deep breath to yell at me....

...so I kissed him. This action managed to confuse and disarm him at the same time, while it wasn't too bad for me either. Once I broke the kiss, I launched right into an apology, not giving him time to recover.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have freaked like that. I shouldn't have dragged you all the way out here like this. I shouldn't have treated you like a kid. I was overly concerned with your welfare and, while I'm not sorry for it, I will try and curb my overprotective tendencies in the future. I know your mad at me, but could you please forgive me, just this once?" I asked, giving him my mega-watt smile.

He never stood a chance.

Heero heaved a long-suffering sigh and gave me this affectionate little half smile, then murmured baka and took my hand, leading me back toward our room. I know I would have been in trouble if he had turned around, because I could not get the smirk off of my face. Luckily for me, he didn't.

As we went near to our room, I paused for a second in front of Lady Une's room. I waved Heero ahead, but he gave me a confused look.

"Go ahead Heero, I just have to talk to Lady Une for a minute," I told him. He gave me a sideways look then asked, "You're not going to tell her I fainted, are you?"

I laughed.

"No, I'm not going to tell her. As far as I'm concerned you passed the test, it doesn't matter what you do afterward. Now go on, I'll be there in a minute."

With that reassurance he didn't hesitate to go into our room. Once he was gone, I turned and entered Lady Une's room. She was, not surprisingly, writing something at her desk. Une liked to keep lots and lots of usually useless logs. Normally they seemed stupid, but every once in a while they came in very handy. She turned to me as I entered.

"Duo, what can I do for you?" she asked me, her face showing a hint of annoyance.

"Sorry Une-baby, I'm not here to play with you tonight. I just thought you'd like to know that Sally won't go to bed again," I told here, grinning before I turned around.

"You know Duo, she is a grown woman. She doesn't need me to tell her when to go to bed."

"Yeah," I said pausing in the doorway, "but she's had a rough day. A little boy died and a little girl lost her arm. She might like some company, in case those nightmares spring up. Just thought you like to know."

"Duo," Une called before I could make a move, "thank you for looking after her for me. And thank you for keeping our secret."

Une and Sally had been in love for a long time, but most of Une's troops thought she was a shoo-in to marry Treize so they gave her a bit more respect. In the same sense, they thought that Une was in love with Treize, so they gave him a bit more loyalty and respect once they came to respect the commander. It was a tender balance that Une and Sally's relationship had almost interrupted, but both parties decided that it would be best if they were discrete about the whole affair.

Une and Treize spent a lot of time together, so it was easy to see where the notion of love came from, but they were really more like siblings. Une had actually met Treize while he was leading his father's army in their second raid. Treize was the first man to find out that Une was really a girl instead of the boy she pretended to be. He was also the one that allowed her to keep her secret and defended her right to fight when she was discovered. For that Treize had won her undying loyalty.

In the same light, Une and Sally didn't see a whole lot of time together. Both their jobs kept them very busy, but they loved their careers too much to give them up. Draw backs were many, but they managed to get around them.

I had proclaimed myself their official matchmaker... or cupid... or whoever they hell guards relationships and makes sure they don't fall apart. I was mediator when they got in a fight and, like now, message deliverer when one needed something and was too stubborn to ask.

I worked as that last one a whole lot.

I nodded at Une's gratitude before giving a cheeky smile and leaving. I could see Une starting to put her books away and new that she would head down the hall to collect Sally in a few moments. They would probably spend the night In Une's room, but they were quiet enough that it didn't bother me.

I wondered for a second if Heero and I would be able to be that quiet, then quickly shut down that line of thought. I might have had a long time to wait before I found out, so it was better just to not hope. Because if I hoped, I might try something and that wouldn't be a good idea at all.

Heero was already asleep in the bed when I entered. I knew he was tired when I sent him into the room. Hell, I could tell just from the way he didn't deck me outside Sally's office. The physical strain of the workout earlier, combined with the mental strain of seeing me panic, was just a bit too much for him.

I slipped into bed that night and wrapped my arms around Heero's warm body. I pressed my face to has shoulder and hugged him tight, causing him to murmur in his sleep. I just laid there, content for the moment.

Then I realized something. I was going to have to be careful of everything I did an said as Heero progressed. No more hints, no more jokes. Hell, I'd have to watch what other people said around him if I wanted to keep from scaring him for life. I'd have to watch how I touched him, too, or I might not be able to control myself. But I figured I'd worry about that the next morning, for tonight I'd just relax and enjoy the feeling of Heero in my arms for what might be the last time for a while.

Mission: Abstain from sexual talk and/or conduct for the next few months until Heero is deemed ready. Do not have sex with Heero.

Impossible.


	34. Heero33

Heero POV

The day after Duo panicked and took me for a checkup with Sally I was to go on Duo and I's first patrol. I was nervous. What if I wasn't good enough? What if I couldn't keep up? What if I just slowed Duo down? I didn't think it would happen, but I wasn't certain.

It didn't help that Duo panicked over what must have been some weird sort of muscle cramp and took me for a check up. I was tired and I really didn't feel like putting up with Duo's melodrama, but I could feel that he really was upset so I went along with him. It was embarrassing, but I guess it was worth it for that kiss I got.

The next day I woke up feeling good, if a bit sore. Duo massaged my muscles, but seemed a little tentative about doing it. I wondered about it a bit, but didn't ask. Sometimes it was hard to understand what was going through Duo's head.

We started out of the castle at about four in the evening. The rest of the day was spent memorizing maps and descriptions of the kids we were after. For a while I thought we weren't going out at all, but I asked Duo and he explained it to me.

"The kids won't be up if we go out this early. The pickpockets will be out and about, but most of the kids in the group we're looking for are thieves, and they start their trade after dark. They'll probably be sleeping most of the day so they can be wide awake at night. We'll be better off seeing if we can't find one of them and track them back to their hideout than to look for the hideout itself in the catacombs."

When I thought about it, I wondered why I didn't think about it like that myself, but I supposed it was one of the reasons Duo was so good at finding the kids, he could think like them. So I didn't complain when we spent the whole day just lounging around. Everyone else seemed to know Duo's routine too, since they weren't surprised to find us still in the castle. Sally even stopped by and thanked Duo for something, though I never really found out what.

We left the castle on foot, heading up a winding tunnel to the surface. I wondered about it, since I had seen that the surface was nothing but trees and forest, but didn't question Duo. When we got to the end of the tunnel we pushed open a second large, heavy door like the one we had gone through to get into the tunnel. On the other side was a huge city where there should have only been forest. I gapped for a minute, unable to comprehend where my equation had bee mistaken.

"I thought it'd be better just to show you than to explain," Duo told me, a grin on his face, "The whole city has a spell over it so that it can't be seen from above and it can't be found by any other route than the one road leading in and out of it. It gives us an advantage over other armies if they do attack because the only way to get to us is to walk right into our land and, most likely, right into a trap. Sorry I couldn't tell you before but..."

I shook my head. I understood that it would be a long time before I knew all the secrets of Haven, but I was alright with that. It was enough that I was trusted by them, I didn't need to know everything.

The city was immense, but not unusual. It was much like the other cities I had visited with Odin, perhaps a bit bigger. Duo pointed out that the city sat on top of an underground river and a system of catacomb tunnels. That was most likely where the kids were hiding, since many of the abandoned buildings had been remodeled and were now occupied.

We started our search outside of a dinner. It was a pretty normal place, middle class, with most of the patrons being merchants or travelers. The little girl had dirty brown hair and wide green eyes. She was about seven years old and in tattered clothes. Her hands and face, though, were fairly clean except for a few smudges of dirt. I was curious as to why someone in so dire a situation would waste time on cleanliness.

"You'd be amazed at what will turn a person away. Some of 'em won't give ya money just because they don't want to get their hands dirty. Also, it helps if you have a pretty face, for some reason. You would think the more desperate you look, the more they'd give, but that isn't always the case. She's young and cute, so people are willing to give her money. But not enough, of course. That's just her cover. What she really is..."

The girl slid up to a couple and took a hold of the man's pants in her tiny little fist, as if trying to get his attention. When he bent down to shoo her, she slipped her hand into his pocket and took his wallet.

"...is a pickpocket."

"Do we follow her?" I asked as the girl skipped a ways down the street.

"No, not yet. Let's go inside and get some dinner. She'll be heading home as soon as the dinner crowd leaves, the street aren't safe for her after dark. If we're lucky, she'll lead us back to her lair. Hopefully we'll get there before the thieves of her group leave. If not we'll have to wait for them to come back and hope they don't get spooked and try to run."

We went inside and ordered a light dinner. I kept my eye on the little girl outside, thinking she might leave before we did, until Duo scolded me about it.

"If you stare at her, she's going to realize we're following her. Then she'll probably lead us on a merry chase that does not end with her leading us to the other kids. One rule of the streets is you never lead a predator to your nest."

I finished the meal staring doggedly at my plate, once in a while glancing at Duo but nothing more. Duo seemed relaxed, talking and joking. Every once in a while he would glance out the window and look around, like he was waiting for someone. His eyes would grave over the little girl but never stop on her, like he wasn't concerned about her at all. I was starting to think that I would have more to learn about this job than I had thought.

It was about an hour before Duo showed an signs of leaving. When he did leave, he didn't walk the way the little girl was walking. Instead, he went in the same direction, but a little to the left of her. As she went down the alley, he turned and we around the building, jogging once he was out of sight so that he would be able to cut her off.

Duo was almost silent as he walked and I was hard pressed to do what he was doing. The sudden turns and stops were taxing to me, since I didn't know just what was going on.

There were several times I almost slipped up.

The little girl didn't have an idea she was being followed. She led us to a more rundown part of the city, a dirty place where most of the buildings were still empty. As we walked, a local officer on a horse came by. He looked at the girl, but made no move to stop her. When he saw us following her, he moved to intercept, but a smile from Duo stopped him in his tracks. He waved and continued on his way.

I finally messed up when the girl turned abruptly and ducked down a small alley. The rocks were wet and loose, Duo had no problem pivoting on them, but I slipped and fell. The girl turned with a gasp and was off like a rabbit. Duo bolted after her immediately and I scrambled to my feet and followed them.

It was only a few minutes before Duo cornered the girl in a small alley, but it felt like hours. We all ran at breakneck speeds and the little girl was panting heavily when we finally caught up with her. She fell to her knees and took a second to catch her breath, but she wasn't finished.

"You had better not try anything," she said, "or my brother will have your heads. He owns this part of town."

"Well, you tell him to drop by and see us sometime sweetheart," Duo said calmly, slowly walking up to her and dropping to his knees, "'cause right now you have to come with us."

Her eyes gained a look of terror and she lunged away from Duo, trying to make an escape. I moved in front of her and intercepted, grabbing her by the shoulders as she kicked and screamed.

"Thanks Heero," Duo said as he rose and came over to us. Near the entrance of the alley we could here footsteps and the officer from earlier came around the corner.

"Everything alright down there?" he asked, calmly walking down the alley toward us. The girl in my arms stiffened and backed up, eventually backing into me.

"Actually, Joe, I have a bit of a favor to ask you. Could you take the little princess here? I wanna see if I can't catch the rest of the band tonight."

"No problem. I'm almost done with work and I can drop her off on the way home. After we stop for some cake and ice-cream at Sally's Dinner, that is," the officer knelt and smiled at the girl, "Does that sound good to you?"

"Am I under arrest?" the girl asked, her eyes wide and fearful. The officer, Joe, and Duo both laughed loudly and I even cracked a smile.

"No, kitten, you're not under arrest," the officer told her, "We just don't want you living on the streets anymore. I'm going to take you to a home where you can eat everyday and sleep in a warm bed and go to school. How does that sound?" he asked.

"I think you're lying," the girl said, looking at the ground, "All the other kids disappear and they never come back. Something awful must have happened to them!" she cried, hugging herself to my legs. Joe looked a bit surprised, but Duo looked at her with a deep sense of understanding.

"Hey, kid," he said, kneeling down beside Joe, "I know it's hard to believe that we're gonna help ya, but we are. The other kids didn't want to come back enough to escape. I know they miss you a lot, but they aren't allowed to leave the orphanage and they don't want to run away They've left it up to me to bring you to them, and that's just what I'm doing. Go with Joe, he's a nice guy. You'll see the others soon enough," Duo told her. It was odd, she seemed to really listen to him.

Duo patted the girl on the head, then stood up.

"We've got to get going," he told me starting to walk out of the alley, "See ya later, Joe!" he called. Joe was still on one knee, talking to the girl, when I left the alley and the sight of them behind. I knew she'd be alright.

It wasn't until after dark that we found our next target. The boy was just coming out of a dark house. He was dressed all in black and had a brown napsack on his back. He was amazingly silent and graceful as he moved over the fence and down the street. Oddly enough, a small, partially developed pair of dark blue wings stuck out the back of his clothing, revealing him to be a demon. He was young, no older than ten, but still older than the girl we had picked up.

"There aren't a lot of demon orphans," Duo told me in a whisper, "but they end up in the same boat as the rest of the orphans, sometimes worse since the pimps like them better than the regular kids."

It was soon clear that he was drastically skinny. His movements were sluggish and he seemed an easy mark. It was easy to follow him, as he moved slowly. We soon followed him into a sewer drain and down a long tunnel. It wasn't long after that before he turned a corner and led us into his lair.

We peaked around the corner and found the place to be a small room filled with about ten children. In the center was a small fire which little room and made it mildly warmer, though still not comfortable. The boy that we had followed seemed to be their leader and the other children immediately surrounded him as he entered. Duo pointed to a second exit as I watched the children and moved to circle to it, leaving me to guard the first exit. In a moment Duo was at the other exit and gave me the okay signal. We both moved into view.

"Hey kids," Duo said, stepping into the room, "what's up?"

The reaction was immediate. Most of the children gasped or screeched, backing away from us toward the corner. A few of them huddled behind their leader, while the leader went into a defensive stance. A second later, he charged me.

It was easy to defeat the boy. After all, he had no training in fighting and was neither as big nor as strong as I was. The hard part was making sure neither of us got hurt. Instead of kicking him, like I would most opponents that charged me, I tripped him and pinned him to the ground. He flailed his arms trying to escape, but soon tired himself out. The room was silent except for the boy's harsh breathing.

"Let him go!" one of the girls cried, "He's hurt!"

I instantly rolled the boy over, but couldn't see any wounds. Duo held his position guarding the other exit, though I could tell he was watching the boy. Quickly I glanced over the parts of the boy I could see. He was thin, definitely under nourished and dehydrated, dirty, and a bit bruised up. His clothes were ragged and he seemed a bit lethargic, but his brown eyes were clear and, though his hair, the dirt seemed to be hiding a light brownish blonde color, could possibly be hiding a head wound, I couldn't see anything that needed immediate medical attention.

"Where does it hurt?" I asked him calmly, but I could tell from his eyes that he wasn't going to reply. I gently eased his shirt up and found a deep knife wound in his lower abdomen. It was swollen and slightly infected, but it wasn't bleeding. It looked to be about a week old, but hadn't been treated right and wasn't healing. I pressed down on the boy's stomach above the wound and heard him hiss in pain, but couldn't feel any broken ribs. There was also no sign of internal bleeding. I came to the conclusion that the boy needed to see a doctor, but he wasn't in any immediate danger.

"He needs a doctor, Duo," I told him. Duo nodded then asked, "How soon?"

"Two, maybe three hours. Any longer and the infection could spread or he could get a fever. I'd like to get him to Sally as soon as possible."

"Alright then, you heard the man. All you kids, follow Heero. I'll keep an eye on the rear. Heero, I need you to carry that kid."

I nodded and lifted the boy in my arms. He made a moaning sound, but didn't fight me. His heart rate was high and I could tell he was scared. Of course, since the kids basically thought we were kidnaping them, I could understand why.

"What's your name?" I asked the boy in my arms. He looked away for a moment before sighing.

"Name's Chase," he told me, "And you'd a never been able to catch me if I weren't hurt."

"Well, maybe when you're better we could race," I told him. He sneered at me.

"If I get better."

"What do you mean?"

"With a wound like this, I'm not going to live. It's already turning yellow, pretty soon I'll get hot and die."

"We won't let that happen. You're going to see a doctor who can fix it."

"Yeah right. What the hell would you waste yer money like that for? There's all kinds a brats out here to work for ya."

"Maybe that's not what we want."

The boy went white and started to struggle.

"I won't let ya pimp me! Everybody run! Dammit leggo!"

"Hush! We aren't going to do anything like that. We aren't going to hurt you."

"Hey Heero," Duo called, "What's going on up there?"

"Nothing, just a little misunderstanding."

"Ah. Trying to explain where we're goin' huh? Well, it's usually better to just let the kids find out for themselves. Come on, we're almost there."

I was surprised to see Duo take the lead and heard us through the heavy door that led from the city to the castle.

"Duo? Where are we going?"

"Guess I forgot to tell you. The orphanage is in the castle. I had Treize open it there so we could keep better track of the kids and they'd be safe from the old thugs. It's also closer to Sally, who insisted on being the orphanage's doctor."

The kids were all enthralled by the paintings and such of the castle. They stared with unbridled awe. I could even see Chase gazing at the paintings and tapestries from my arms, though he managed a bit more restraint than the others.

We passed the kitchen on our way to the orphanage. The cook, an older woman named Mona, came out to greet us.

"Oh, Duo, is that the new batch of orphans?" she asked him, "Here, let me get you something for the dears."

She bustled into the kitchen and came out again with a box of hard candies. I had learned very early that Mona was fond of candy and always had at least six pieces on her at any given time. It was fortunate that she gave most of it away, or she would have been much more plump than she currently was.

At first the children were tentative about taking the candy, but as soon as one took it and popped it into his mouth the others eagerly joined in. I made sure Chase was able to get a piece and, though he was still distrustful about us, he seemed a bit more relaxed.

It was only a few feet down the hall that we found the orphanage. At first it didn't seem like much, just a sign on a door that read, "Solo Maxwell Memorial Orphanage."

Inside it was like a complex. There was a large room with a series of door, all marked with a different label and color. A blond woman came out of a door marked Staff and smiled the kids.

"Hello there. My name is Sister Anna. Welcome to the Solo Maxwell Memorial Orphanage. You are all allowed to go where you please inside this compound. The blue door is your sleeping quarters. Everyone has their own bed but you'll all sleep in the same room. The green door is to our indoor garden and playground. The brown door is our school room and the orange room is where all of you will eat. The purple door is the bathhouse and, yes, you will all have to get baths once a week, but if you're good you can play with the bubbles. We'd prefer if none of you went into the staff rooms, but if you need one of us for anything you're welcome to come in and get us. Now, if you will all just sit down, one of the sisters will take you and help you bath and get you some clothes, then you can go to sleep. I know most of you aren't used to going to bed this early, but we need you to be up in the daytime so you can all attend class. Now, who's first?"

The children had all begun sitting down and seemed very taken with Sister Anna, so I took my leave with Chase, though Duo stayed to help settle and guard the new orphans, in case they still tried to run away. We headed straight for Sally's office, knowing she'd still be in even though it was getting late. We weren't disappointed when we got there, Sally immediately set to work on Chase.

"Well, let's see what we have here. Take off your shirt, hon," Sally said after I had put Chase down on the examining table. Chase looked at Sally distrustfully but did as she asked, removing his shirt. Sally only took a second to look at the wound before turning and getting a vial off of her cabinet. Chase watched as she picked up the needle before bolting toward the door. I stepped in front of him and managed to catch him, then put the struggling boy back on the table.

"Dammit! She's not going to hurt you!" I yelled as the boy kicked and screamed.

"Hold him still," Sally told us as she swabbed his arm and quickly injected him. Once the shot was over the boy started to settle down and we were able to release him.

"You're going to feel sleepy," Sally told him, "Don't try and fight it. Trust me, you don't want to be awake while I fix your cut," she said, then bustled out of the room.

"What's she gonna do to me?" Chase asked, grabbing my arm from his place on the bed.

"I told you already, she's going to fix your cut."

"But... why?"

"Because it's her job. This is what she does."

"Why are you helping me?"

"Because I was told to. Because the king doesn't want kids on his streets anymore. Because this is what I do. Because you needed it. Any of those answers would be acceptable."

"Will you be here when I wake up?" he asked me, his eyes starting to droop.

"Yeah," I sighed, knowing my conscience wouldn't let me leave now that he'd asked. And then his eyes closed and his breathing deepened in sleep.

Sally came back a few minutes later. She didn't seem surprised to see the boy asleep as she shooed me into the hall.

"I'll wait out here," I told her.

"I don't see why. It'll be hours before the boy wakes."

"I promised him I'd be here when he woke."

"Ah. I see. Well then, I'll call you in when I'm finished."

I waited outside for about an hour before Sally called me back in.

"I'm all finished. The wound was infected, but it was in the early stages and was easy to clean. It was pretty deep, but missed any internal organs, so it was still just a flesh wound. It's going to take a while to heal and there might be a lot of scarring, but the boy will fully recover."

Sally left soon after that, saying she wanted to check on the other children that had just come in and give them their first checkups. I asked her to tell Duo where I was.

It was another twenty minutes of waiting before Chase stirred. He moaned in his sleep and began pushing some unseen force away from him, his hands coming out from under the pristine white sheets to fight off his attackers. He was mumbling desperately and incoherently. I knew the signs of a nightmare well and set to waking him.

"Chase, wake up. It's just a dream. Wake up," I called softly, shaking him slightly. He came awake abruptly, bolting upright. We sat in silence for a moment, the only sound being Chase's heavy breathing.

"Chase? Are you aright?"

"What's going on? Where am I?"

"You're in the palace. We brought you hear earlier, remember? Sally tended the wound on your stomach."

"W-where are my clothes? What happened to my clothes?" Chase asked, his voice taking on a hysterical edge. I rose from my seat beside the bed in case he tried to run again.

"Calm down. The wound on your stomach is very low. Sally might have undressed you so your clothes didn't get in the way while she was working. We'll get you other clothes."

"I-I need them now. I have to check on the others. And Rain. Rain didn't come back today. She's still out there, all alone, I have to go get her!"

"The little girl, brown hair, green eyes, pickpocketing by the dinner? We picked her up before we got you. She's already in the orphanage. You can go see her when you're better, for now you need to rest."

It was a long time before either of us spoke. Chase's eyes were far away in memory and thought. I knew that he needed to lie down, but I didn't want to frighten him by pushing him down to the bed.

"Am I really safe?" he asked me quietly. I nodded. Chase let out a deep breath and allowed himself to fall back to the bed and I returned to my seat. As I sat down, Chase turned his face away from me and started breathing oddly. It was a moment before I realized he was crying.

"Chase, are you alright? Did you pull the stitches on your stomach?" I asked. Chase shook his head, but still wouldn't look at me.

"I didn't think it would happen," he told me, his voice thick with tears, "I was safe for a long time. I lived with my family, my father was a banker, my mother was a beautiful woman, and my grandmother always read stories to me. I was so happy. Then soldiers came... and... and... I was alone. I knew my family. I had a mom and a dad, but I ruined it! I let them be taken away! I deserved to be out in the cold! I even knew my birthday, but I didn't know what day it was or what year so I never knew how old I was. I could read and write, but it never mattered. I let my family die! I..."

I took him in my arms, as I had often done with Duo, and held him while he cried onto my shoulder. It was strange. In some ways it was exactly the same as it was when I held Duo, in others it was completely different. Either way, I comforted him as best I could as he cried himself out. Eventually, he tired and stopped crying.

"Go to sleep," I ordered, lying him back against the bed, "I have to go now, but I will be back. You are safe, trust me. Sleep now, I'll come and see you tomorrow."

I knew Chase didn't want to let me go, but he was too tired to fight and simply nodded, trusting me to return.

I quickly found Duo, watching the children smile as one of the sisters read them a story. Some of them were huddled together in little groups, others sat by themselves listening to the story in rapt fascination. Duo was smiling, watching them as I approached and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Everything went well with Chase."

"Who?"

"The boy we picked up, that's his name."

"He told you his name already? That's unusual. The older ones are pretty stubborn about saying their names most of the time. So he's doing alright?"

"Yes. I promised I'd go see him tomorrow."

"I'll go with you. I'd like to go tonight, but I'm kind of hungry and tired. How about we head back?"

I nodded, but Duo didn't move, continuing to watch the kids. After what seemed like a very long time he said without looking at me, "This is why I do it. It's not the pay, or any sense of duty or anything like that. I just like watching the kids smile, I like knowing their safe and not out on the streets. But mostly, it's the smiles."

He rose and we started walking toward our room. I was hungry and tired from the day and wanted nothing more than to eat and go to sleep. Then a thought struck me.

"Hey Duo?"

"Yeah?"

"We get paid?"


	35. Heero34

Heero POV

I didn't sleep well that night. All night I tossed and turned, thinking of the odd thing Duo had done when we went to bed. It wasn't a big thing, but it troubled me.

We had gotten ready for bed just like always and laid down. I had gotten in first as Duo was doing things, small things like fixing the candle's position and going in and out of the bathroom. Just dawdling. It was unusual for Duo. When he finally did lie down, he put his back to me and didn't curl around me like he usually did. It helped that he immediately rolled over and plastered himself to me once he was asleep, but I still wondered why he had done such a thing. Perhaps I had done something wrong. Or maybe he was just getting sick of having me around. Whatever the reason, worst case scenarios danced through my head all night long.

Even the next morning when I went to see Chase, it preyed on my mind. I realized the other day that there had been something wrong when Duo hadn't hugged me. Now, most people wouldn't have even noticed the sudden lack of subtle touches, but for someone like me, who had come to cherish those touches that had never been in my life before, it felt like a deprivation. And the worst part was that I didn't know what I had done wrong so I didn't know how I could make it better.

Chase was in better spirits. He seemed happier and asked some more questions about what was happening. Sally insisted that Chase stay in bed a few more days so she could keep an eye on his infection. Chase wasn't all that happy about that, but didn't make too much of a fuss.

We stayed and talked with Chase until Sally kicked us out, saying Chase still needed to rest and recover. I had discovered, after Duo had finally informed me of our wages, that we only worked once or twice a week so we didn't overload the orphanage staff. We would have the rest of the week off then trying again. Of course, we would have to patrol the city every night, but we weren't supposed to go after a group of kids more than once a week.

I must admit, I was a bit sullen after we left Chase. It irked me a bit... it irked me a lot that he got a hug that morning and I didn't. I wasn't jealous, so much as I was concerned and upset. We already went over the doubts my mind was giving me, seeing Chase get a hug instead of me only made them louder.

Sally stopped us before we even made it out the door, saying she wanted to talk to me. By the way she said it, I assumed she meant in private, so I asked Duo to go get us a table for lunch. As soon as Duo left, Sally led me into a small, private room and closed the door.

"I wanted to talk to you about what happened the other night," she said, pacing the room, "when Duo frantically hauled you down here. Now, I'm still sticking with my, "Don't worry about It" policy, but I thought I should explain things a little better. Most boys learn about these things long before they reach puberty, but with your upbringing you weren't informed of these things. When a child hits puberty their body starts to show signs of a need to reproduce. That was the way the male body shows it's ready. It's normal for boys to bodies to show this action when they hit puberty..."

"But I've already hit puberty."

"Well, yes, you have, but at the time your body was under too much stress to react the way it was supposed to. You also may or may not have missed your growth spurts. I know Duo just hit his last fall, but yours might have come and gone while you were too weak to sustain them. All I'm saying is don't let Duo upset you. He was worried that you had never... had never had an erection before, but that only really shows how much he cares and worries about you."

I nodded in acknowledgment and rose to leave.

"Oh! One more thing, I should probably warn you that, now that your body has started this behavior, it will probably continue fairly often."

I gave Sally another nod, turning slightly so that I could see her. I was surprised to find a slight blush on her cheeks.

"Sally? Is something wrong? You're blushing."

"Oh! Umm... no, um, nothing's wrong. Now... um... you had better get going, Duo's waiting."

I frowned in concern as I left and made a note to ask Duo about Sally's strange behavior, but didn't protest. After all, Duo was waiting for me and I was still a bit concerned that he was mad at me. I made a mental note to try to make him forgive me.

We had to give our report of the mission to Une. Duo took me down to the barracks and showed me to Une's office. From there the secretary gave us some paper and pens and told us to file a report. Duo warned me to keep it down to one page or face the wrath of Une. He laughed, then explained that, since Une had to read and file all reports by hand, it was best to keep it short so that she wouldn't have to waste time on unnecessary stuff. We both wrote our reports, then exchanged them to make sure there were no errors or inconsistences. Duo's paper at first seemed scattered and full of unnecessary things, but looking closer I found that he noted all sorts of things that I hadn't even noticed, in his own personal style. My paper was more direct, outlining our all our mission's main points. It also outlined each of the children we had brought in, paying special attention to Chase. I hoped we'd be able to find a place for him in the castle, I was growing rather fond of him.

We spent the rest of the day just goofing off. Duo showed me some more maps of the city and we went swimming in one of the underground lakes. We went on our patrol after lunch and made it back in plenty of time for dinner. Duo went to take a shower and I straightened up the room.

When Duo came back out he was in nothing but a towel. His hair was doen and hng in clumped tendrils sparkling from the water. His bare chest had a light sheen to it and I could suddenly see myself running my hands all over it. He moved to the dresser to get his clothes, dropping the towel to get his clothes. My eyes strayed to his uncovered butt and long member and i felt my pants tighten. I looked down and was surprised to see a bulge in my jeans.

"Duo, it happened again," I called, wondering what I was supposed to do about it. It didn't hurt, actually it felt surprisingly good. Especially if I moved my hips just so...

"What happened," Duo asked me, putting on his shorts and turning around. His eyes fell on my pants and he managed a surprised little, "Oh," before turning beet red. "G-Go get a shower. A cold one. Quickly," he told me. Though I hated cold showers, I scurried to do as he said.

Unfortunately, the cold water didn't seem to help. I stood in the shower, it's walls warm from Duo's shower, and stood under the cold spray of the water but all I could think about was Duo's naked body and how, just minutes before, it had been in the shower right where I was standing completely naked.

"Hey Duo, it's not working!" I yelled, turning the shower off.

"Umm... Try... uh... Try rubbing it!" Duo called back. Obediently, I fisted my member in my hand and started rubbing it in slow, hard strokes.

"It's just making it worse!" I called and had to moan loudly at the pleasure of rubbing my own swollen flesh. Duo made a strangle noise from in the bedroom.

"J-just keep going until you explode."

"Explode! I don't want to explode!"

"No! I-it's a good thing, trust me!" Duo yelled back to me and started to laugh. I could barely hear him over the pounding of my own blood, but I tried to listen in case he had any other instructions. Something was building inside me and, though I was a little hesitant about exploding, I didn't think I could stop it now.

I managed to hear a knock on the door, interrupted halfway though by my own moan, and Duo saying, "What brings you here commander?" After that I couldn't hear anything. It was like all my senses had been focused into this one little sliver of pleasure. My whole body writhed with it and I found my hand going faster and faster until I finally came in an explosion of pleasure. A white, stick fluid shot out of my member and splattered on the walls, but I was barely even aware of it. I sank down to the floor as waves of pleasure rolled over me, finally easing and subsiding.

I smiled as I lifted myself off the floor, happy and content for no reason at all. I quickly finished my shower and washed the white fluid off of the walls. I dressed and went into the bedroom, I felt like curling up beside Duo and going to sleep, or maybe getting something to eat.

Duo and Une were sitting at the table when I came out. Duo was looking uncomfortable and a dark blush was going across his face.

"Ah, Heero, there you are. I wanted to ask you some tings about your report. I hope I didn't disturb your shower."

"No, I was just trying to loosen a muscle," I told her. Duo made a squeaking noise as I pulled up a chair beside him. I felt all warma nd fuzzy, like when I was having a good dream. Absently, I leaned against Duo while talking to the commander. I explained a part of the report to where the children's nest was. Duo was oddly rigid and silent as we spoke. Finally, Une and I finished and she moved to leave.

"Duo, you still need to finish that report on the Wing stronghold," she said as she rose to leave.

"I'll do it tomorrow, I need a shower," Duo said, jerkily getting to his feet but staying behind the table.

"You just got a shower," I told him, confused.

"I need a cold shower."

"Oh. Do you want some help?"

"No! I- Gah!" Duo said, turning and practically running for the bathroom and slamming the door behind him. I watched the door for a minute, wondering what I had done to upset him so much, then turned back to Une. She was also watching the door with an amused look on her face.

"It's no wonder Sally gets so rattled when she's around you two."

"I don't understand."

"Let's just say your relationship should be a spectator sport. I'll see you later," she said, then left. I wondered about what she had said, then about Duo's odd behavior. I hoped it wouldn't last long.

But Duo's strange behavior continued, if anything it got worse. For three days he didn't touch me or hug me like he usually did. He seemed nervous and edgy, meanwhile my mind was making up so many scenarios of what I might have done wrong that I couldn't keep them all straight and ended up trying to make up for two different things. By the fourth day, I was almost out of my mind and decided I needed some help.

With Quatre and Treize away, the only person I could think of close enough to Duo to know why he was mad was Sally. It wasn't hard to find time to talk to her, since Duo and I had been going to see Chase every day. He was doing pretty well and scheduled to be released into the care of the nuns soon, but Duo warned me that he would probably not be adopted. A boy of that age was usually wanted to give some extra help around the farm, with Chase's injury he would never be able to lift heavy weights again and so would be useless as a farm hand. It didn't seem fair to me, but I knew enough about the cruelness of the world not to doubt Duo's words.

When we got to the medical wing that day I let Duo go in to see Chase while I said I would go ask Sally about his condition. It was easy to fool Duo, we had both been working on our mind barriers and become fairly good at them. It felt nice to once again have some privacy in my own mind while still being able to share what thoughts I wanted, but what I wouldn't give for those first few days when there was nothing between our minds and our hearts.

"Hey Sally," I called, entering another room in her medical complex, "Can I talk to you?"

"Sure Heero, What's wrong?" she asked, putting down a testtube and wiping off her hands.

"I think Duo's mad at me and I don't know what I did wrong," I told her, Sally stilled, looking at me with confusion and concern.

"What makes you think that?"

"He won't touch me," I told her simply and se coughed, her face going beat red.

"Excuse me?"

"He won't touch me. He won't hug me or curl up with me like he used to. He's nervous around me and I don't know why."

"Oh," Sally said, looking a bit relieved, "Maybe you should ask him about it."

"I did and he keeps saying he's not mad but he still won't touch me. Maybe he's sick of me."

"Heero! You know that's not true!"

"I know, but what else could it be? Maybe I'm physically repulsive to him. Maybe..."

"Maybe he likes you too much."

"What?"

"Maybe he wants to hold you too much and is afraid of scaring you."

"But that's silly. I love it when he touches me and I know he'd never hurt me."

"Look Heero, I'm going to tell you what I know. Where you go from there is up to you and Duo, understand? I'll tell you what I think you should do, but I doubt you'll listen to me. I've already talked to Duo..."

"So you know why he's mad at me?"

"For the last time, he's not mad at you! Duo... When to people love each other... Um... that is... Duo wants to take your relationship to the next level! There, I said it, get out! Out!"

"Sally, I don't understand. What do you mean, take our relationship to the next level? We already did that, Zechs helped. And Quatre, in the library we went to the next level. Sally? Are you alright, you're face is all red."

"Y-yes, I-I'm fine. What I mean is... Duo wants to have sex with you."

"Sex? What's that?"

"Oh god!"

"Sally?"

"Umm... Sex is.. Uh... Sex is.... When... uh... two people get together and... uh... Wait! I think I have a pamphlet on sex! Oh thank you! Thank you! Yes, yes I have a pamphlet around here somewhere. Ah! There it is! Sweet, beautiful little pamphlet! Now, you read that while I go check on the dying people."

"Who's dying?"

"Me!" she squeaked under her breath then ran out of the room. I wondered about her strange behavior and hoped she'd be alright. She was definitely coming down with something.

I read both of the pamphlets Sally thrust into my hands, one called "Puberty and Sexual Intercourse" that other called "Sexual Education for Same Sex Couples." It was very informative, especially the pictures. I was a little worried that Duo wanted to do the same thing to me that Dekim and Barton had, but relaxed when the pamphlet said, "There should be little or no pain if couples go slowly and are aware of the other's feelings." Duo would be more than aware, since he could feel what I was feeling.

I thought for a long time about what to do, whether or not I should ask Duo about ti or just ignore it. One the one hand, I wouldn't have to worry about having sex with Duo and what it would do to our relationship, but Duo would probably keep his space and not touch me like he used to. On the other hand we could try it and not like it, or maybe I wouldn't like it and Duo would, and still screw up our relationship.

I worried about it until Sally returned.

"Finished reading yet?"

"Yes. What do you think we should do."

"I think you should wait. At least wait until you're secure with your body and you understand more about what you're doing."

"Does Duo want to wait?"

"No, Duo definitely does not want to wait, but he will because he loves you and he wants to do what's best for both of you. He won't rush you if you're not ready."

"But I am ready, otherwise my body wouldn't be telling me it is."

"Yes, physically, you're ready, but to mentally and emotionally. I know your hormones are telling you it's time, but I think you should wait until you're both more comfortable with each other," she told me, her voice taking a stubborn edge. I frowned.

"How can you get more comfortable with someone than having your minds linked together?"

"Heero, you have to understand... Oh, you're not even listening to me anymore. Well, I've said my peace so whatever you do from here on out is up to you. Just head my warning, if you do go through with this make sure you have plenty of time and don't rush it. If you don't feel comfortable with it, don't do it. Oh, and get some oil. Trust me, Duo will know what it's for. Now, get out of here, I have other people to deal with and you still have to see Chase. Go on, out!"

As I walked down the short hall to see Duo and Chase, new plans and preparations were forming in my head.

Mission: Have sex with Duo.

Accepted.


	36. Duo35

Duo POV

Mission: Do not have sex with Heero.

Or, at least, that was what it felt like. I had to constantly on guard against my hormones, which wanted nothing more than to throw Heero against the bed and make him scream in pleasure. Make him scream, with those beautiful eyes glazed over with passion, his tight, muscular thighs thrown open, and his fully erect... Damn it! Bad thought bad thoughts bad thoughts! Bad! Bad! Bad! Down Duo, down!

Could you really blame me? I mean, I did have a Japanese sex god with no qualms about nudity or touching in my room. In my room, hell, I had him in my bed and in my shower. The only place I didn't have him was where I wanted him, between my legs!

It was almost a week before Treize returned. I almost lost my mind. It was like Heero wanted to provoke me, like he was trying to make me horny. To my utter mortification he started sleeping naked. Said he liked the way the blanket felt and nothing I said would change his mind. Not even when I went out and replaced our blankets with the itchiest one I could find, one of those wool and plastic army surplus deals. But nooo, not Heero, couldn't back down to even the itchiest of fibers. In the end all I got was a hard on with a rash before I gave up and let Heero have his way. And then he wanted to have showers together, said they saved on the water supply. I got him to give up on that one after I didn't take a bath for three days and the smell drove him out of the room. That was the last we heard of saving water. See? I can be just as stubborn as Heero.

Possibly the only thing that saved me was Treize arriving home. Otherwise I might have died of blood loss since every drop of it was in my dick. Treize coming home managed to give me something else to think about, other than Heero and sex. And Heero having sex. Having sex with me. In the pool. Under the moon...

Damn it all! Gah! I swear I am just going to put my crotch in ice one day and freeze it off! What the hell is wrong with me, I can't go five minutes without thinking naughty thoughts about Heero!

Treize's return was both a great relief and worry to everyone. Of course the castle was happy Treize had returned safely, but we all worried what had come about on Treize's trip. War was a constant threat while we rebuilt our nation and all of us knew that, should we come to blows with another nation, our progress would be stifled, possibly regressed. Our nation couldn't afford a setback at this time, the toll if such a set back came to be would be paid in lives. It weighed heavily on all of us.

The first thing I noticed when Treize came off the carrier was the lack a frown he would have had were the possibility of war great. The second, was the oriental boy at his side.

"Hey Treize, I thought you said we weren't allowed to bring home strays anymore," I yelled as he came into the room. Treize smiled, but the boy next to him bristled. So he was one of those snobby types.

"Ah, but how could I turn away such a charming gentleman?" Treize asked me, his voice light and teasing while his eyes strayed to watch Wufei, probably to see how he reacted to me. Beside me, I felt Heero's mind asking questions and pushed back a blank feeling, telling him I didn't know any more than he did.

"So, charming," I said, standing in front of the Chinese boy, "What's ya name?"

"I am Chang Wufei of the Dragon Clan, fourth son of..."

"Stop! Stop! I just wanted a name, not a family history," I told him, seeing that this could go on for hours, like it usually did with nobles. I threw a glance at Treize, begging him to tell me this wasn't one of those snobby rich brats that I had to lead around by the hand all the time. Ugh! Bunch of ninnies who couldn't even wipe their own asses.

Treize's eyes wouldn't tell me anything and Wufei was still glaring dagger at me. I decided to try and ease the tension a little.

"Anyway, my name's Duo. So how'd ya get Treize to bring ya here, did ya stow away?" I teased. Or at least, I thought I was teasing. Wufei, apparently, thought I was trying to insult him.

"Insolent wretch! How dare you insinuate that I would stoop as low as to stow away like a peasant! Like a common thief!"

Well, didn't that just insult everything I was?

"So what, maybe you bribed the king here with your body, is that it? I bet that took care of your passage with a little to spare!" Wufei's face went beet red, telling me I had hit a nerve. With a cry, he charged me.

"All right, that's enough excitement for you," Treize said, deftly grabbing Wufei around the middle and lifting him. "Duo, Wufei will be staying with me. He is a student from China and is here to learn. He is under my protection, if you have any problems with that you can take them up with me. Wufei, Duo, though sometimes loud and annoying, is one of my most trusted advisors and most skilled warriors. It would not be a good idea to charge him whenever it strikes your fancy."

And with that, Treize walked off, hauling Wufei over his shoulder. From our vantage point, Wufei and I managed to glare daggers at each other until he was out of the room.

"What was that all about?" Heero asked once the two were gone.

"I don't know," I told him moodily, "Something about him just rubs me the wrong way. I hate rich kids that never had ta work 'n think they can just boss everybody around. Gets on my nerves. Come on, let's get out of here."

I had decided the day before that it was time for Heero to get some things to do away from me, so he wasn't quite so dependant. Not that there was anything wrong about being dependant on me, just that I thought it would be better if he had some of his own interests, if his whole world didn't revolve around me. So I took him down and signed him up for one of Une's archery classes, something he seemed genuinely interested in. I knew Heero had been trained with a bow by Odin when he was young, but he hadn't been able to use one in a while and we spent a long time getting him reacquainted with the weapon. After that it was time for our patrols of the city.

By the time Heero and I finished our patrols and arrived back at the room Wufei was far and gone from my mind. I was sweaty and exhausted, but it felt good to be finished with work. It was our routine for Heero to straighten up the room while I showered and I would get something to eat while he showered. Usually I went first, but I didn't complain when Heero headed for the bathroom ahead of me. I was tired enough that I just flopped back on the bed and rested for a few minutes, then went down to the kitchen to get us some sandwiches. The kitchen staff had quit catering to us after the first week, though it might have had something to do with the trip-wire I put in the hall or the scratching powder I put on the doorknob...

I came back and found Heero just coming out of the shower, still wrapped in a towel. I set the sandwiches down, grabbed my clothes, and dodged around him into the bathroom so I wouldn't be tempted too badly. Too bad the image of Heero half naked was so seared into my brain that I had to take a long, cold shower. I thought I'd freeze to death by the time I got out, then once I was out the chilly air hit me and I thought I'd die. I just couldn't catch a break.

Which is when I noticed that I hadn't brought any clothes in with me. I could have sworn I did, but the evidence against my bringing clothes in, being that the clothes were not there, was too much to disagree with. So I braced my shivering body, wrapped the towel tightly around my waist, and marched out keeping my eyes directly on my target, the dresser. I had to think of this as a mission. Heero was the enemy.

"Duo, what are you doing?"

Ewhoo! Ewhoo! Enemies sighted to the left corner! Evasive action! Evasive action!

"Nothing."

"Then come sit with me."

Enemy fire! Lock, load, fire when ready! Return enemy fire!

"I can't right now."

"Why not?"

"Because I can't."

"Please Duo, I'm cold."

Evacuate! Evacuate! She's going down!

"Heero... I'm not dressed."

"I don't mind. Please? Don't you love me?"

Surrender, it's over.

And, against my better judgment, that's what I did. I knew I was no match for Heero's hurt looking eyes or his beseeching smiles. I was done for. I turned to him and stopped dead.

"Heero, you're not dressed!"

"So that makes us even."

"But... but... but...

"What's wrong? It's not like you haven't seen me naked before."

"But... but... but..."

"D-do I repulse you? Is that it?"

"No... but..."

"Then come lay down with me, you said you would."

I sighed. How did I get myself into these situations? Slowly I walked over to Heero, keeping my eyes away from his naked gorgeous body, and laid down on the bed beside him. I'd be alright if I could just keep some space between us...

A notion that was shot to hell when Heero freakin' crawled on my chest and glued himself to me, snuggling by wiggling in a very provocative manner.

It was like I went into a coma from shock. I don't know how it happened, but Heero managed to get my towel off of me without me even noticing it. I clenched my fist, trying to think of anything but Heero and my aching erection. But Heero ignored this and continued to wiggle against me in a way that was killing me slowly.

It happened so fast that even I was surprised. I tossed Heero off and leaped from the bed, backing away from him. I saw a startled, hurt look come into Heero's eyes, but I couldn't stand it! There was only so much one person could take! I had to hold out, I had to restrain myself!

"Must... not... molest... Heero..."

"Yes!" Heero yelled, "Yes, molest Heero!" he said, springing from the bed and advancing on me as I backed away. It took me a moment to realize what he said, but when I did I think it startled me back into my right mind.

"What? What are you saying, Heero? You don't even know what you're talking about. I'm not going to do anything until you're ready..."

"But I am ready! I want to do this with you! I want to be as close as we can be!"

"But..."

"No, Duo, I want this. For me, for us."

"But aren't you scared? After... after what happened?"

"You wouldn't hurt me. I know that. I trust you. Please, show me it's not all bad. Show me it can be good. Please Duo, show me you love me."

And with a moan, I broke, grabbing him by the arms and pulling him forward for a long, deep kiss. A lover's kiss. Our first real, lover's kiss.

When I finally released Heero, I was prepared to see fear in his eyes, or at least apprehension. I was not in the least bit ready to see the carnal lust in those two cobalt orbs, but damn if it didn't do something very good for my ego! And when we came back together for another kiss, it was Heero who had the most vigor, the most excitement. Not to say that I wasn't excited, but Heero was like a ravenous animal at a great big Duo buffet.

Our kissing soon lead to touching and the touching soon led to the bed. It was more of a falling to the nearest soft object kind of thing than it was a conscious decision, but we both made it to the bed anyway so the outcome wasn't too bad. When we landed we were side by side, but I soon took the initiative and pushed myself to my knees over Heero.

Heero froze, his eyes going far away. I paused, startled, then looked at our positions and rolled off of him. Thinking quickly, I pulled him up, placing him so that he was sitting on my stomach.

"Heero," I called gently, "You okay?"

Heero shook himself, his eyes coming back to rest on my face.

"I think you startled me," he said sheepishly, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Now we know what not to do. Is this okay?" Heero nodded. "Then lets continue where we left off."

Heero attacked my mouth vigorously from his position, leaning over me and using his weight for a deep, forceful kiss. While he kissed me, he rubbed our crotches together making me moan into his mouth. I could almost feel my moan reverberating down his throat and it served to arouse me even more.

"Heero," I said hoarsely after we broke the kiss, "Do you want to be... inside me?" I asked, still trying to catch my breath. It took Heero so long to answer, while putting his hands to good use on my nipples, that I thought he hadn't heard me.

"No," he said finally, his tone serious and his voice deepened with lust, "I want you inside me. I want it to be like before, but _not_ like before. I want you to make it feel good, so I won't ever be afraid again. But I don't think I can..."

"It' alright, we can do the same thing just fine from right here. Though you're gonna have to do most of the work. Good thing your leg muscles are so strong, or you might not be able to..."

He shut me up with a kiss. How easily I forgot to talk when my mouth was full of Heero's tongue. Heero expertly kissed me, swiping his tongue across the inside of my mouth and nibbling on my lips. I have to say, I was damned impressed. I was hard pressed to match his skill as a lover and I had been with hundreds of people, girl and guy alike. Heero was just a natural sexpot.

When my lungs felt like they were about to explode, Heero pulled back. I gasped for air and writhed, rubbing my swollen member against Heero's thigh. We were both panting.

"Now," Heero said, a small grin on his face, "Tell me what to do."

I probably would have been a bit annoyed with his conniving ways if there was enough blood left in my brain to think with. As it was, all my blood had flooded into my cock, something which desperately needed tending to.

"Lube... in the bathroom," I managed to gasp out, then whimpered like a puppy when Heero left to get it. Damn it, I was a professional whore, I wasn't supposed to be writhing beneath Heero, it was supposed to be the other way around.

I guess... I guess that Heero was just so used to taking orders from people that when he finally let loose in bed he wanted to be in control. It was an infuriating, infatuating mix. One half was controlling and domineering while the other was timid and wanting to please. Because of Heero's upbringing, I hadn't been able to see much of the controlling side, only the shy, quiet half. But as Heero became more secure in his surroundings and more confident in himself his more controlling side was coming out. And, I had to admit, the controlling side was just as delicious and fuckable as the other.

Heero returned with the lube a moment later, immediately crawling back up and settling himself on my stomach. He paused then, confused and unsure of what to do. I realized I would have to take control of our play, if only for a little bit.

"Lay back," I told him while sitting up. To be sure I wasn't hurting him and that Heero wasn't frightened, I opened our link a little more. I would have to keep it mostly closed or the combination of both our pleasures would drive me over the edge before the fun was over.

Heero did as he was told, a slight hint of fear racing across his mind. He calmed when I didn't remove my legs from under him, so that I was still somewhat pinned and he was still at an advantaged position. Not to say that Heero was consciously thinking that I would hurt him or that he needed to be in a place where he could run away. Simply that, in the back of his mind, a part of him remembered the last time something like this had happened and was being cautious. If I could just calm that piece, I'd be home free.

I moved Heero's legs so that the were bent and spread, giving me easy access to his weeping cock and his tiny entrance. I actually thought of asking Heero to take me. It was our first time and a small part of me worried that I would hurt Heero and he'd never trust me again. I had been taken many times and, though most of them weren't good, some of them hadn't been bad. I was used to sex and it didn't scare me like it did Heero.

But I also understood what a big step this was for Heero. It took me ages to trust Sister Helen enough to let her hug me, but she always said that she'd like a hug whenever I was ready. If she had turned to me when I had offered and said, "It's okay Duo, you can wait until later," I might have never gotten the courage to do it.

It was that thought that gave me the courage to spread the slick lotion on my fingers and gently push them into Heero's tight entrance. I watched the link for any signs of pain, ready to pull out if it started to hurt him, but it didn't.

At first it was a strange and uncomfortable for Heero. He wasn't sure what to think of the stretching sensation my fingers were giving him. When he found that it didn't really hurt, he started to relax and even began to enjoy the slow sensation.

When I felt my finger press up against that tiny numb inside Heero, I hurried and shut our link. Just in time, too, because Heero gasped in pleasure and arched off the bed. It was a good thing I did, because I would have been pushed over by that pleasure, I was almost coming just watching him.

"Now!" Heero moaned harshly, "I want you now!"

And we both knew it was time. Hastily I pulled my fingers out and lubed my erection, using more than I would probably need in a week, but I was taking no chances.

Heero was too far gone to even notice our positions, but even through my lust-filled haze I realized that some part of his mind would realize what I was doing if I pulled my legs out from under him. With out position as it was, with Heero's legs spread to either side of me, I could reach my own erection and could probably have gotten it inside him, but I wouldn't have the leverage I needed to complete the job. It seemed somewhat akin to torture.

Quickly I pulled Heero up to sit on my lap. He was dazed and confused but soon saw my large erection bobbing in front of his and got the idea. He lifted himself up and, with my help, positioned himself over top of me. I think Heero had some odd notion about slamming down and getting it over with as fast as possible. Quickly, almost panicky, I placed my hands under his thighs to prevent him from descending. Slowly I allowed him to come down, inch by torturous fucking inch. We were both shaking with exertion by the time Heero was fully settled, but there hadn't been any pain involved and the price was well worth hearing the moans and gasps from Heero as he slowly nestled himself around me.

We were both beyond speaking, something come to a miracle for me. For a moment, neither of us moved. I was the first to start moving, thrusting my hips shallowly in an effort to get Heero to start. After a second Heero started too, lifting himself and slamming back down.

Our coupling was fast and rough. The lust I had built up inside for so long seemed to seep into Heero and he road me with a fervor. The bed bounced and the walls shook with the sounds of our passion. And of course, neither of us were exactly quiet with our passion, what, with all the screaming and yelling and calling each other's names. The castle would be talking about the two of us for months, but we didn't care.

It ended too soon. Heero, this being his first time and all, came first, crying out his passion as loud as he could. Heero's body tightened around mine and I was only a second behind, shouting as my seed spurted inside him and his covered my chest. Heero finished and collapsed against me while I still thrusted languidly into his body, riding the last few waves of pleasure out. Then we were both quiet, panting and holding each other, sweat and exhausted. Once I regained a bit of energy I pulled Heero off of me and settled him in the crook of my arm, pulling up the blankets to cover us I could see Heero's skin begin to goosebump as his sweat dried and I wasn't exactly toasty either.

"Duo," Heero sighed, snuggling himself against me, "That was wonderful. Thank you."

I chuckled. "You know," I said, "It wasn't exactly awful for me either. You're amazing." Heero only smiled sleepily, his eyes drifting shut.

For a long time I just held Heero, content and tired, but once thing was bothering me and I had to get it off of my chest.

"Hey Heero?"

"Hmm?" he said sleepily, his eyes staying closed.

"Where are my clothes?"

"I put them back in the drawer."

"So you did take them while I was in the shower."

"Mm-hmm."

"Heero?"

"What?"

"Next time you decided to seduce me, do it before my shower."


	37. Wufei36

Wufei POV

My first days at Haven were... not as I expected. It was not on my agenda to be insulted by one of Treize's closest friends the minute I got there, nor had I planned to return the favor. I was relieved when Treize was not angry at me for the outburst, but also a bit angry that he didn't defend me.

Though, from what I soon learned from the staff about this Duo, I wasn't so sure that his words were spiteful in nature. From what the doting, but somewhat terrified staff told me of him he was merely a harmless prankster that liked to tease and play practical jokes but rarely lost his temper.

I, it seemed, was one of the few people to truly make him angry.

A part of me, the part that desperately wanted friendship and acceptance in this new, foreign place, wanted to apologize for my behavior and possible misconception. Again it was my pride that thwarted me, convincing me that I had done no wrong and that the last member of the Chang clan could not possibly stoop to apologizing to a cur like him. I didn't need his friendship, I would be fine with Treize at my side.

Unfortunately, Treize was not at my side nearly as much as I would have liked. Unlike at the imperial palace, where he was practically on holiday, Treize worked long and hard at Haven and had to leave me for the most part of the day. It was alright the first two days, but after I had explored everywhere and met many of the people in Haven I began to long for a companion. Not to say that Treize neglected me, the quite mornings and evenings we spent together were what kept me from madness, but I had much more free time than he did and not much to do with it. I was lonely and bored.

On the second day of my stay in Haven I began to do my katanas in the underground garden before lunch. Even while I worked at the imperial library I had kept up with my training, feeling invigorated every time I pushed my body to the limit. Plus, the magic cast by Treize's sorcerer invigorated me also and I had more energy that needed burned than usual.

It was on the fourth day of my stay at Haven that I met up with Duo again. His partner, Heero, was strangely absent that day. I had seen Heero on several occasions and, though I could not imagine how he put up with a menace like Duo, he seemed extremely more tolerable than his braided counterpart. I had abstained from speaking with him, though, afraid he would harbor a grudge against me because of my quarrel with Duo. I also saw Duo most places Heero was, being a general nuisance of some kind or another. It boggled my mind why the staff didn't refuse to work for him, or why he was so close to Treize. Even more confusing was, though the staff was always on the lookout for his annoying pranks, they talked about him with a strange affection that one would have for a close friend or distant family member. Regardless of the nuisance he made of himself, they seemed to favor him.

I'm ashamed to say it made me jealous and angry. I was working hard to win their respect and acceptance, while the baka seemed to have gained it without trying at all.

I didn't hear him approach. To this day I'm not sure if was because I was so involved in letting go of my problems through my katanas or if he was just being quiet so that I didn't hear him. Duo can be surprisingly quite when he wants to be, something I learned much later.

"Hey," he called, startling me so much that I dropped my sword and turned to defend myself.

"What do you want?" I growled, angered at myself more than him.

"I just wanted to say that you looked pretty good with that sword. Jeeze."

"And what would you know of Chinese fighting?" I asked before I could rein in my tongue. I instantly regretted my words, I didn't want to make our feud any worse than it already was but my tongue just couldn't seem to stay in check. Luckily for me, he didn't take insult as I thought he would.

"Nothing, but I know fighting in general. I'm a bit of an expert in street fighting."

"You mean randomly trying to hit your enemy, managing to do so only by luck or stupidity?" I asked. Duo smirked at me.

"Would you like to find out?" he challenged and I moved into a fighting stance without even thinking. I had never been one to turn down a challenge.

Though Duo went with my prediction and did not get into any known fighting stance, he didn't tense up as I had thought he would. Instead, he kept loose, his arms at his sides, watching and waiting for me to make the first move. For a moment we stood, each weighing and measuring the other. Then I, impatient to end the fight, charged him. My sword lay forgotten on the ground, so I aimed a punch at his stomach. He surprised me by being much faster than I had expected, dodging to the right as my momentum carried me past. Once my back was to him he kicked at my ribs, but I managed to turn enough to grab his foot and throw him onto the ground. He landed hard as I turned back to him but used the force of my push to roll onto his stomach and jump back to his feet. This time he wasted no time attacking me, crouching down to bring a kick around to try to knock me off my feet. I easily evaded this blow by jumping and kicked him in the chest while I was at it, knocking him over. Unfortunately for me he managed to bring his hands up to catch my foot, pulling me to fall with him. We landed in a tangle of limbs and were at a stalemate while we untangled ourselves.

I had never fought so crudely before. A disgraceful displace such as pulling your opponent to land on you would never have been allowed in the rigid society of Chinese fighting, but I had to admit that it was effective. Duo didn't have the military precision I had come to respect int Treize, but he was a skilled fighter none the less. His moves, though crude, were agile and well planned. He had lasted much longer than most of my opponents.

But I would not let him win. Up until that time I had just been testing him, not yet serious about the fight. Now, I wanted to end it. Using the speed the my slight build lent me, I ran toward Duo, dodged around the fist that tried to stop me, and used one of the easier techniques I knew to punch him in the side of the head. I was again surprised by Duo's agility, as he turned his head and managed to somewhat cradle my blow. The force of it knocked him down, but it didn't knock him out like I had intended. He rose easily, a grin on his face.

I was so startled I didn't see his muscles bunch just before he attacked. I was too late with my block and he punched me in the gut, sending me flying through the air and knocking the wind out of me. I lay on my stomach and tried to get air back into my lungs as Duo came up behind me and pressed a foot to the back of my neck, showing me that, had he wanted, he could have snapped my neck and killed me. Then, as quickly as he done it, he backed away and allowed me to roll over and catch my breath.

The duel was over. Again I had lost.

I sat up and coughed, getting breath back into my lungs and feeling the soreness over my body. I hadn't had a workout like that in a long time, it felt good, though it was disappointing to have lost. I was not worthy of the name Chang. I was weak.

I stared at the hand that had been placed in front of me, startled and confused. It was only when I looked up at Duo's smiling face, not the smug grin he had worn earlier but a real smile, that I realized he was offering to help me up. Even my pride could not override my manners which told me that it would be insulting not accept the help of a worthy opponent. I took Duo's thin but strong hand and he pulled me to my feet.

"You fought well," I told him, my eyes on the ground.

"Eh, you weren't so bad yourself. I'm gonna have a nice shiner here tomorrow," he paused and I saw his smile fade. He sighed. "Look, I'm sorry about what I said when you got here. I wasn't trying to be mean or anything, you know? I was just teasing, I do it with everyone, I just figured you wouldn't mind. I won't do it again, okay?" he asked.

I was shocked. I hadn't expected him to apologize. Then again, I hadn't expected a lot of things about Duo. Looking back, I could barely remember what Duo had said that had gotten me so mad. Just a vague notion of being called a stray and an insinuation of using my body to pay Treize for passage. The first one wasn't really that insulting and the second I had really provoked. I began to feel guilty about my own harsh words.

"I... was wrong too. I shouldn't have gotten so mad about something so little and I shouldn't have said those things. Though I still think your second insult was a bit harsh."

Duo laughed, turning to me with that damnable smile back on his face. I was beginning to se why everyone loved him so much.

"Yeah, I guess I was a little more stung by your comment than I should have been. It... hit kinda close to home."

"I don't understand."

"Well I used to be a thief and a streetrat. I guess I just don't like people talking about thieves and street kids like they're some kind of plague. You don't have any idea what ti's like out there," he told me, his smile gone again and his eyes far away. I was tempted to be angry again, that he had insinuated my life had been easy, but I decided against it.

"I understand a bit. I'm an orphan now too, you know."

"Yeah," he said, the smile coming back like someone hd hit a switch, "but you're lucky. My parent kick the bucket and I'm out on the street. Yours die and you go home with one of the most powerful men in the world. Not to mention gorgeous! Have you seen his butt yet? Man, does he have a tight ass!"

"You... were intimate with Treize?" I asked, appalled to think that I was simply here to replace his lover in bed. Duo simply laughed harder.

"Me and Treize? No way! Ya see, we actually managed to get him drunk this one time in a bar near the big river, I don't remember it's name, and we convinced him to go skinny dipping in the middle of winter. He took off all his clothes, marched through the middle of the town, and dove right into the river! Millardo and I had to fish him out and take him back to the hotel. It took him a week to unshrivel his..."

"Duo!" Treize called, making the braided boy jump, "What kind of stories are you poisoning my dragon's head with? Don't you have anything better to do?"

"No, not really. Besides, I was just getting to the good part."

"Ugh, you are incorrigible. And Heero is letting you tell these stories? Where is he anyway?"

"Oh, he signed up for an archery thing. He's really good with a bow, but he wouldn't let me play with the bow anymore when I shot an arrow through an apple."

"That doesn't sound so bad," I interjected.

"You're right," Treize said, "It doesn't. So what's the rest of the story, Duo?"

"Nothing."

"Duo."

"I don't see what the problem is. I mean, I didn't hit Une or anything."

"So she was carrying the apple?"

"Actually, she was eating it. You should have seen her face."

Treize rolled his eyes, but I cracked a smile. I had met Une a few days ago and I would have loved to have seen her face when Duo shot the arrow through her apple.

"I'm guessing you really weren't all that interested in archery then?"

"Nah. Besides, I figured Heero needed some time alone. I mean, he won't go down to the docks and play around with Howard and they guys anymore with me, so he should have something for himself too."

"Howard? That salvage man? I thought he ran a ship across the tundra."

"He did, but he's gettin' older, though he won't ever admit it. He's settled down a bit and now runs the salvage business out of his house."

"So you go down and entertain him by, what? Going to bars?"

"Yep, that's about it. I figure I could go to the bar with Howard and his apprentice, Hilde, while Heero goes to archery practice. He won't go to the bars with me since Hilde threw up on his shoes. I'll tell ya, that girl can't hold her liquor, but she can sure drink it! Just the other night she..."

"I'm sure this is a great story Duo, but Wufei and I have to go. We're late."

" Oh sure, always interrupting me when I get to the good parts. I'll bet you just want to get him back to the room while he's tired so you can..."

"Goodbye Duo."

"See ya, ya big pervert."

I was smirking as Treize led me away. I had to admit, Duo was not at all what I had thought he would be. He wasn't the refined sort of person I was used to, but that was even better in it's own way. While sophisticated people were nice to listen to they were often boring. While Duo's language wasn't pretty it had it's own flow and charm that I found intriguing.

"Where are we going?" I asked Treize as we headed down the halls toward a part of the castle I was not familiar with.

"You're going to have a tutor," Treize replied, shepherding me toward a flight of stairs. I immediately grew excited as we traveled up the stairs, my hunger for knowledge surfacing. I had hoped I would be able to learn more about Haven and Russia, but I hadn't wanted to bother Treize.

It seemed as though the steps went on forever, taking us higher and higher. At one point I wondered if we were above ground, but realized we could not be. Not even magic could hide things above the tree-line in Haven, a tower would certainly be suspicious.

When we finally came to the top of the stairs we were faced with a heavy, wooden door. Inside the door was a room stacked with books and odd herbs, jars and glass containers filled with an odd assortment of things.

A tall, bald Chinese man came out from behind the stacks of books. He wasn't as old as I had imagined, but almost everything else was as I had pictured. He was a bit taller than I had thought, but other than that he was nothing out of the ordinary.

"Wufei, this is your teacher, Master O. Master O, your new pupil, Chang Wufei."

Master O and I both bowed in customary Chinese greeting and I could see a pleased smile on his face as he appraised me.

"Well Wufei, I hope you are an apt student. I will not stand for laziness. In my class you will learn history, language, mathematics, chemistry, medicine, foreign affairs..."

I was so pleased with the list of new things I would learn I almost missed the one that surprised and appalled me.

"...and sorcery."

I froze. Sorcery? I couldn't learn sorcery! Sorcery was the source of all my problems, it was the thing responsible for the death of my entire family. I looked to Treize for reassurance, but he wasn't even looking at me. He was acting like nothing was wrong.

"Well," Master O said, shuffling back to his books, "It's too late to start now. I'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning, Wufei."

I was so shocked, I barely remember being pushed toward the door and out to the stairs. I didn't really get over the shock until we had reached the bottom of the steps.

"Treize," I hissed, "I can't take sorcery!" I told him. Treize stopped and turned to me.

"Why not?" Treize asked, a confused look on his face. I couldn't believe the man didn't know what I didn't want to learn more sorcery.

"It killed my entire family! It has been the cause of nothing but suffering for me my entire life! I want to forget it exists, not gain more of it!"

"Wufei, you need to learn to control it." Treize was fighting me about this? Why? Why did he want me to learn sorcery so badly? Why couldn't he just leave well enough alone?

"I don't want to control it! I want it gone!"

"I can't cure sorcery for you, it's impossible. You'll just have to learn to live with it and use it to help others."

And then it hit me. Treize only wanted me here so that he could use my sorcery to defeat his enemies! How stupid I had been, to think that he would want me, an orphan with nothing to offer.

My pride wounded, I gave Treize a withering look and fled. He shouted for me as I went, confusion and worry coming over our link, but I ignored it.

It hurt. It hurt so bad to think that, finally, I was loved and needed. That I had finally found a place where I could belong. Even at my home I hadn't been truly accepted because I had always had to hide my magic and my preferences. I thought Treize had accepted me, but he only wanted to use me for his own benefit. How stupid I had been!

I wasn't consciously aware of where I was going, but some part of me led me back to the underground garden and I ended up sitting by one of the streams watching the little fish swim by. The sound of flowing water comforted me and made me feel more at peace, but it was unable to stifle the fear in my heart. I wondered what I would do now, in this strange land with no place to go back to. Hugging my knees, I was ashamed to feel tears tracking down my face. I wiped them away harshly, but more followed and I couldn't seem to get them to stop. A quiet sob stole from my throat and I was powerless to stop it. I bit my lip, hoping to muffle my cries, and curled into a ball on my side. It was all too strange, too... good. I didn't fit in, I would again be shunned and cast aside. I couldn't take it.

I didn't notice that someone had found me until they touched me on the shoulder. I jumped and turned quickly to find Duo looking at me, concern in his eyes. I turned my head, trying to hide my tears and my shame, but Duo would have none of it.

"Hey, come on. There's nothing to be ashamed of. What's the matter?"

"It's nothing," I denied.

"Didn't think you'd be cryin' in the weeds for nothing," Duo said, a half-smirk on his face as he pulled me to look at him. "What's wrong?"

"You wouldn't understand," I told him, hoping he'd give up and leave. I had no such luck.

"Of course not, you're the only one who's ever bawled his eyes out." Duo moved closer and put a hand on my shoulder. "Give up already, I'm not going away," he told me, and pulled my protesting body into his embrace. I tensed immediately. The only person who had even held me like this was Treize, and I was in love with him. Was Duo...? But I thought Heero and he were...

"Chill," Duo told me as I continued to stay tense, "This is called a friendly hug. I know you're not willing to give up Treize and, though you're cute, you're no Heero for me. Relax, we aren't doing anything wrong."

I slowly relaxed after that and finally managed to put my hands around Duo in a feeble attempt to return the favor. He had gotten to the crux of the problem with his last sentence. Though I desperately wanted to accept the comfort he was offering, I was afraid I would betray Treize by doing so. I wondered briefly how Duo could understand what I was thinking so well.

We sat there in silence for a few minutes. I had some vague notion that Duo was waiting for me to quiet my tears before questioning me again. I was both trying to get my emotions under control and trying to figure a way of escaping without revealing my problems to Duo.

I was afraid Duo would think I was being ungrateful and he would take me back to Treize. After all, if the positions had been reversed I would have thought I was being ungrateful and whiney. After all Treize had done for me, I wanted to deny him the one thing he asked of me. Guilt stabbed me, but I still could not bring myself to go apologize to Treize. Not after the disappointment of knowing I was being used.

I was so deep in my thoughts that I didn't hear the approach of another person until the bushes parted to reveal Heero. Duo found me because I was making noise, but I wondered how Heero had found us. I wasn't making nearly as much noise as I had been.

Heero looked surprised at seeing the two of us sitting like that and I wondered if he would be angry at Duo. Another stab of guilt hit me, I was just making trouble for everyone.

Heero surprised me, though, by simply sitting down beside where I was sitting, half thrown over Duo's lap.

"Jealous?" Duo asked Heero over the top of my head. Heero merely grunted in reply. "Don't be, you're the only one I'd ever lick strange fluids off of odd body parts for."

Heero put a placating hand up at the horrified look on my face.

"Ice-cream, on my nose, at lunch," he told me. I looked up at Duo to confirm this and found a grin on his face.

"What did you think I was talking about, Wuffie?" he asked. I gave him a sour look but didn't reply. Duo laughed and I could hear Heero chuckle.

"So," Heero asked once they had finished laughing, "What is all this about?"

"I was just about to ask that same question myself," Duo declared looking expectantly at me.

I was surrounded. With Heero to my left, Duo to my right and the lake in front of me there was really no where I could go.

"Come on," Duo cajoled, "We're going to find out sooner or later anyway."

"I... I don't want to talk about it," I told them, hoping again they would just go away.

"Too bad," Heero told me. I sighed and supposed that they really weren't going to give me any other option.

"I think Treize only brought me here so he could use my skills as a... so he could use me," I said, trying to cover my slip.

"As a what?" Duo asked me, having noticed the slip in my speech.

"As a sorcerer," I told him, bracing myself for the appalled looks and harsh rejection. It never came. Neither of them seemed even fazed by my revelation.

"Why would you think he's using you?" Duo asked again. I wasn't surprised that Heero stayed silent, actually I was glad I only had to deal with one of them grilling me.

"He wants me to learn sorcery."

"Oh! The audacity!" Duo said sarcastically, rolling his eyes at me, "Is that all?"

"I don't want to learn sorcery! I hate sorcery! And he's going to make me learn it because that's the only reason he brought me here!" I shouted, surprising even myself with my vehemence. Duo nearly jumped with surprised and didn't make a grab for me as I rose to flee. Heero, however, was in no such state and grabbed my wrist before I could get out of reach, dragging me into his lap.

"Is that what you really think?" Heero asked quietly, "Do you really think Treize would do that to someone?"

I thought about it for a minute. Did I really believe Treize would use someone for his own purposes and nothing else? No, I didn't. Knowing Treize as well as I did I knew he was an honorable man and he wouldn't use anyone or force them to do anything they really didn't want to. However, my mind needed a reason, some dark, horrible reason that all these good things were happening to me so suddenly. I just couldn't get what I knew was true about Treize an what my logic was telling me to come together.

"No," I said quietly, "I don't think Treize would do that to anyone, but..."

"But you need a reason for being here, eh?" Duo said, having gotten over his shock and once again giving me a friendly hug. "I know how that is. When I first came to live here, I spent my first three months sneaking around and spying on people, completely paranoid that someone was planning to use me for evil or something. It took Quatre and Treize almost a year and about a week of nights spent bawling my eyes out to really convince me that I was wanted here."

"Even Duo and I have had some fights while I was trying to adjust," Heero told me, "One particular one that almost ended our relationship while we were still in Wing and several minor squabbles here because I was afraid I wouldn't be good enough. And because Duo's such a mother hen," Heero added.

"Hey!" Duo protested, "It's not my fault you have such a high pain tolerance. I bet you'd set your own leg if I allowed you."

"Heero," I called, the frightened edge to my voice attracting both their attentions, "Do you think I've ruined my relationship with Treize? Do you think he'll hate me?"

They both had the audacity to laugh.

"The way Treize has been tearing up the palace trying to find you? The only way you'll lose you're relationship with him is if he dies of a heart attack before he can find you," Heero told me.

"Then... I suppose I should get back to him," I said, pulling away from the two and feeling better than I had in a long time. I was about to leave when Duo grabbed my sleeve.

"Hey, I wanted to tell you one more thing," he said, his face taking a serious note, "Treize isn't going to back down about this sorcery thing. Not," he added quickly, "because he needs you to be his sorcerer or anything, but because it's dangerous for you to go untrained. Sorcery that's bottled up has a tendency to explode and kill both the wielder and the people around him. It's better to use your magic for little things so that so much doesn't get backed up. And think about becoming Treize's sorcerer. You may not know it, but Treize has scouts all over the place looking for a suitable sorcerer. Without magic Haven wouldn't be here and if Master O dies everyone in Haven will be killed. I'm not at liberty to tell you why, but magic is what keeps Haven going. We need someone to replace Master O and you're just really convenient. I won't tell you to do something you don't want to, but think about it. It would help us out a lot."

"I... will think about it," I told him and walked away from my two new friends. I needed to find, and apologize to, Treize. I also had to really consider whether or not I wanted to be Treize's sorcerer. I didn't like my magic, but maybe it wouldn't be so bad if I could put it to good use.

As I walked out the door I heard Heero whisper huskily to Duo, "Now what were you saying about licking odd body parts?" before I fled into the hall and pulled the door shut behind me. I could only hope the two of them were quiet until I was out of hearing range.


	38. Trowa37

Trowa POV

It was the end of our trip, something I anticipated with excitement and dread. I had never been in a home that stayed in one place with people that never left. Being raised in a merc ship I had always traveled, mercs always coming and going whenever their job was done. I was excited about living like normal people.

On the other hand, I was afraid. I wasn't certain that Quatre's friends could accept me. What if they turned me away? What if they shunned Quatre because of me? What if it was the same way it was on the merc ship?

It was only Quatre's constant presence in my mind that kept me from hiding. The constant feelings of calmness, happiness, and love kept me from being overly afraid, though they couldn't stop all of my fear.

The climate had changed as we went north, gradually getting colder and colder. Wasn't upset by this change since my natural home, though I had never seen it, was in the forests farther north. I often wondered where the mercs had managed to get me, since werewolves didn't usually come out fo the mountains they inhabited. Other types of weres, like the lynxes and desert foxes, were native to the hotter regions, but not the wolves.

Of course, as I soon revealed to Quatre, I could actually change into any animal. The title werewolf came from the fact that I had to turn into a wolf at the full moon and it was easiest for me to change into that animal. My parents also had to be werewolves, though I had never known them. I had taken part of the day before we would arrive at Haven to show this power to Quatre, partially to enlighten him and partially to help calm myself and expend a little nervous energy.

Most of my burns had healed with the full moon, an occurrence that wasn't unusual. Only the burns on my face, which had proven to be the deepest, lingered. Unfortunately though the burns were gone some heavy scarring had remained. I had never been conscious of the way my body looked before, the worse I looked, the less the mercs grabbed me. Now that I finally had a reason to be glad for my good looks it seemed almost torment that I would end up scarred the way I was.

It only served to make that much more nervous as we approached Haven. What if, baring all other things, Quatre's friends rejected me because I was hideous? What if Quatre couldn't stand to look at me? What if...

"Stop it," Quatre said, interrupting my thoughts as he encircled my waist in a hug from behind and pressed his face into my back. "You're doing it again."

"Doing what?"

"Worrying. My friends are going to love you. I love you. You're beautiful. Nothing is ever going to change my love for you, not even what you look like or what my friends say. Though all my friends are going to be able to say is how beautiful you are. Understand?"

I nodded, the smile on my face matching the excited grin on Quatre's. His reassurance was good, though I still couldn't stop being nervous. But, I realized, I would risk anything to be with Quatre, overcoming this fear wasn't too hard a task.

"Look," Quatre pointed excited over the railing of the ship where we stood, "There it is! There's Haven!"

"Quatre, I don't see anything."

"Oh, of course you don't, but you'll see when we get there. You'll see," he finished mysteriously and I had to wonder about this place. What kind of a castle couldn't be seen? All I could see was rock faces and sharp cliffs in the wide crevace that we had managed to get our ship into.

The maganacs' ship turned sharply toward a granite wall in the tight passage we were in. I grabbed Quatre as we headed for the wall and wondered what in the world had happened to make us crash. I clasped Quatre to me as we headed for the wall and certain death...

When all of a sudden the wall disappeared. Instead, we came to rest in a huge hole in the cliff's face, some kind of underground docking bay. I looked around astonishedly, my eyes finally coming to Quatre, who was smiling mischievously and I realized something.

"You knew all along," I accused, a slight smile on my face. It was a good trick.

"You wouldn't have believed me if I told you," he said, then his smile faded just a bit, "You aren't mad, are you?"

I grinned and pulled him closer.

"I don't know," I said into his ear, "I may have to punish you," I told him, gently biting his ear. He giggled in delight, but quickly put our play to rest.

"Stop, don't let Duo see you doing that, we'll never hear the end of it."

"Why?" I asked, again concerned, "Will he dislike our being together?"

"Oh no, nothing like that. He just teases a lot, you'll get used to him. Come on, I can see them!" Quatre said, taking my hand and leading me to the walkway that had been set up.

I glanced over the rail as we started walking. There were about a hundred people lined up to meet the maganacs. All of a sudden, I felt my body go to ice. I couldn't do it. I couldn't meet all those people. IN my mind, I could see them all turning and looking at me. Attacking me. My place had always been in the shadows, where no one could see me, where I was safe. I couldn't go out in front of all of those people...

And I felt it start to happen.

"Quatre!" I whispered harshly, "There's something I need to tell you! I..."

But it was too late. Quatre turned around and gasped, looking at me with shock. I put my head down in shame. How could I have let this happen? Quatre couldn't take me with him the way I was.

But instead of being annoyed or even angry as I thought he would be, Quatre laughed and knelt in front of me.

"You should have told me," he said, smiling as he rubbed my ears. I licked his hand, hoping he wasn't mad at me. "I had no idea you changed into your wolf form when you're frightened."

He knelt beside me for a few moments, petting me and thinking. After a while he said, "I don't suppose you're going to change back any time soon?"

I shook my head. I didn't really know when I would change back. Sometimes it happened when I wanted it to, sometimes it happened when I felt safer, and sometimes it happened when I wasn't even thinking about it. I had already tried to change back and couldn't so I figured it would be a while before I was able.

"Well, we don't want you to end up naked it if you do change back, but you look big enough, maybe I can..." Quatre began to fiddle with my clothing, eventually getting it rolled up so that it wouldn't fall off my wolf body, though it wasn't exactly comfortable. Still I tolerated it, the last thing I wanted was to be naked in front of all those people.

"Alright then," Quatre said, "Let's go see everyone."

And with that, Quatre led me, still in my wolf form, down the walkway and into the crowd.

A lot of people greeted Quatre. It was instantly obvious that he was fairly popular but, while he was courteous to everyone he seemed to be heading toward a specific group of people. There were five of them, two women, one with two buns on her head, the other with a pair of spiral pigtails. There was a tall, ginger haired man beside a boy with tousled brown hair and blue eyes and another boy with a long, thick braid who was smiling brightly.

"Quatre!" the braided one shouted, "You got a dog! Oh, he's adorable!" the boy said, kneeling and throwing his arms around my surprised shoulders, "And aren't these clothes just awesome! We're going to have to put him in some of my clothes and make him look so cool! What did ya name him? Huh?"

"Duo..." Quatre tried to interject while the braided boy lavished attention on me. I was starting to get a but anxious. The boy was way to close to me and, though I somewhat liked being fawned over, he was overdoing the attention.

"I love him Quatre! I've always wanted a dog! I think I'll give him a kiss!"

WHAT?!

My mind managed to grasp the concept of what was about to happen only as it was too late and the other boy's lips were on mine. I was so shocked I couldn't think.

I did manage to come back to myself when I heard a group of gasps around me and the blue-eyed boy growled, "What the hell?"

I looked down to find myself back in my human body. I suppose that being so surprised by the braided boy I had forgotten about being nervous and changed back.

Chaos erupted. The braided boy jumped back, while the blue-eyed boy took a menacing step forward. Quatre stepped in front of me and tried to explain, but everyone was talking at once and soon they were all yelling.

"What the hell is that, Quat?" the braided one shouted.

"His name is Trowa and he's with me. He's a werewolf..."

"A werewolf! Don't you know those things are dangerous? And you let me kiss him!"

"You were the one that kissed him! I can't believe you would kiss a dog..."

"Hey, shut up! And what about you, you got some bestiality thing going or what?"

"That's just sick, Duo! You have no right to..."

"Boys," the ginger haired man said, trying to calm them, "Enough already."

"Duo shouldn't say those kind of things about Trowa! It wasn't Trowa's fault!"

"Well it sure as hell wasn't mine!"

It was like my nightmare was coming true. They couldn't accept me because of my werewolf blood and Quatre was fighting them because of me. What if...

Guilt assailed me and I suddenly felt sick. The full moon had healed many of my wounds, but I was still weak from the burns. The healing and activity of the full moon had sapped most of my strength. And suddenly it was all I could do to keep from fainting.

"Trowa!" I heard Quatre cry as I began to fall to the floor. There was movement and, strangely, two sets of hands grabbed me and held me up.

"Trowa, can you hear me?" Quatre asked as they held me up, "Can you stand?" I looked up to see Quatre and Duo, no longer angry but looking worried, holding me up. I tried to put my feet back under me, but it felt like my legs were jello. There was a pounding in my head and I moaned, shaking my head as I lowered it.

"We'll have to carry him," Quatre said, taking control of the situations he often did.

"Here, give him to me," a deep voice said. I felt myself being moved, lifted, and I was suddenly in the arms of someone I didn't know. He smelled good, I realize as my head fell against his chest, not like Quatre but good none the less.

"We can put him in my room. Sally, will that be alright?" I heard Quatre say.

"I don't know, maybe we should take him into the medical wing for some tests. Do you know what's wrong with him?"

"He's weakened. He was terribly burned a short time ago and, though it's all healed, he's still weak and with so much stress... I knew I should have made him stay in the ship! I could have just waited until everyone had gone and taken him discretely up to my room but I was so excited that I..."

"Stop worrying. If everything you've told me is true he's probably just exerted himself too much. Let him sleep for a few hours and he'll be as good as new. Treize, could you take him to Quatre's room? I have to talk with Doc before the maganacs leave again, but I can check on him later. Maybe Wufei could have a look at him? Werewolves are a bit outside of my jurisdiction."

There was a movement, like the nod of a head, and I was suddenly being moved. I couldn't even open my eyes, but I listened to the sounds and heard three more sets of steps. I was relieved not to be alone with the man carrying me, Treize I thought his name was but wasn't quite sure.

We walked for a few minutes and then stopped. There was the sound of a door opening and then we were moving again. A moment later I felt someone laying me down on the bed.

"How is he?" I heard Quatre ask. A large hand pushed aside my bangs and laid on my forehead.

"He's got a bit of a fever, but he seems alright. Let's let him rest. I think Duo and Heero can watch him for now, I need you to come talk with Une and me. There are many things you need to know."

"But... what if he wakes?" Quatre asked.

"Duo and Heero will be here. Right? You two can watch him, can't you?" Treize asked.

"For now. We have to go on patrol in a little while, but there's nothing pressing right now," Duo replied.

"Wufei can watch him once he finishes with his classes. Master O wouldn't let him out of his lessons even for the maganacs arrival. He drives that boy hard, but Wufei loves it. We best get going, Quatre, the longer we wait, the longer until you return." There were footsteps and the sound of the door opening, then closing. I was a bit hurt that Quatre would just leave me with these people like that, but I guess he trusted them, though I did not. I tried to keep myself awake, but must have fallen asleep. Not surprising, really, seeing as how I couldn't even get my eyes open.

"Hey," someone called, shaking me, "Hey, wake up."

I moaned and opened my eyes, feeling a little better though I could tell I hadn't slept long. I closed my eyes again, throwing my arm over them to black out the dim light.

"Hey, you awake now?" Duo asked.

"Yes," I told him raspily.

"Me and Heero have to go on patrol now. Wufei's supposed to be here in a little bit but we just wanted to warn you we were going and tell you not to leave the room. Go back to sleep now," Duo said, moving away from my bed. The door opened and closed and I knew the two were gone.

I tried to go back to sleep, but I was nervous about being alone in a strange place. That, and I had to go to the bathroom. Sighing, I took my arm off of my eyes and got up. I would have to go find a bathroom or a door leading outside where I could do my business. Something so that I didn't soil my borrowed clothes and Quatre's bed.

I stood up and immediately sat back down when my head started to spin. I waited for a minute, then tried again, this time more slowly. I got to my feet and slowly walked to the door, still feeling tired and a bit fuzzy-headed. Opening the door, I checked the hall to see if anyone was around. Seeing no one, I walked out the door and closed it quietly behind me.

I walked down the halls aimlessly for a bit. Though my walk had been short, I was already feeling tired and hoped I would find the bathroom soon or, if not, at least find someone to ask directions from. I had never been in a place so huge.

Fate, it seemed, was on my side when a Chinese boy walked hurriedly around the corner and almost ran into me. He stopped suddenly and stared up at me, his eyes going at once to my disfigured face.

There was a strange emotion in his eyes, not revulsion or fear as I would have thought, but a sort of uncertainty, then a determination that I couldn't understand. Slowly, the boy raised a hand and placed it on my cheek. My face began to feel warm, then to tingle. In a second, the feeling was gone.

The boy shook himself, like coming out of some sort of daze. I reached my hand up and felt my face. It was as smooth as it had been before I was burned and the pain was gone. I was shocked that the boy had helped me so, and I wondered why. I looked at the boy once more.

A sort of regret, almost anxiety had come on his face. Abruptly, he started walking again, his head low as he hurried by me.

"Thank you," I managed to whisper before he got around the other corner. He stopped, turned to me, surprise written clearly on his face.

"You're welcome," he said finally, bowing slightly. His words seemed to break the spell my surprise had cast on me.

"Do you know where I can... relieve myself?" I asked, hoping my blush didn't show on my face.

"There is a restroom near the cafeteria," the boy told me curtly.

"I don't know where that is," I replied. The boy looked at me warily, possibly distrustfully. "I new here," I explained, "My name's Trowa." The boy visibly relaxed.

"So you're the one this Quatre brought home. Lord Treize asked me to check on you, he said you were unwell. There is a bathroom in Quatre's room."

"I wasn't really thinking straight when I left," I told him.

"Come. We should get back before Quatre find's you gone and sends out a search party," the boy said and I had to smile. Quatre would indeed send out a search party if he found me missing.

It felt good to be loved.

Quatre arrived at the room much later than we had and Wufei, thankfully, didn't inform him of my little trip. Quatre was stunned by my sudden healing and I later explained to him what Wufei had done. He also explained Wufei's odd behavior to me, telling me that Wufei had come from China and, according to Treize, sorcerers were prosecute in Wufei's homeland.

My next meeting with Duo was not nearly as tense as my first, he even endured some good natured teasing about it. It seemed that Duo wasn't harboring any anger at me from our first encounter, like I feared he would.

Quatre was busy a lot of the time during my first week at Haven. He made time for me and was always truly sorry when he had to run off for some important meeting with the king, but I was still disappointed that he had to be away so much. Being extremely wary of people, I don't make friends easily, so I was often left alone in our room. Duo, Heero, Wufei, or Treize came up to see me sometimes, but they were all busy with their own lives and I didn't want them to pity me so I didn't complain when I was left to my own devises. I didn't want to seem ungrateful, but I was bored and lonely.

It was almost two weeks after I arrived that Duo asked for my help. We were at the table for lunch, Quatre beside me, Duo and Heero in front, Treize and Wufei diagonal, and Une and Sally to my other side.

"So Trowa," Duo asked, "Can you turn into a dog like that whenever you want?" he asked. Quatre frowned.

"It was a wolf, Duo," he corrected.

"Snout, tail, fur, they're all the same," Duo said, waving his spoon around as he chewed on a mouthful of food.

"With that braid you have two out of the three things you named. Does that make you a dog, Maxwell?" Wufei taunted. Duo almost choked on his food and Heero had to pat him on the back while smirking at him.

"Real nice, FeiFei," Duo called back, sticking his tongue out a minute later. I wasn't surprised, Duo and Wufei were fairly good friends and this kind of thing happened often.

"Yes, I can transform at will," I said, bringing the conversation back to me, "Why do you ask?"

"You know 'bout me and Heero being on the Night Force, right? Well, there's a bunch of kids that we keeps seeing but just can't find. They've got this really good hideout and we can't seem to find it. We've had Wufei over there down in the sewers a couple of times looking for the kids, but his magic can't go through the steel of the pipes. What do ya say, will ya sniff 'em out for us?"

"What will you do with them when I find them?" I asked. I really didn't want to be part of a child massacre. I wasn't sure what I'd do if Quatre wanted me to go along.

"We take them to the orphanage," Duo said, releaving my fears, "You've seen it. The nuns run it for us. Every couple of weeks we go out and round up and bring them here. Any more than that and we'd scare them all into hiding. Chase is one of the kids we brought in, you remember meeting him, right? You can ask him about it if you want."

"When do we leave?" I asked.

"Heero and I go on patrols everyday. We'll take you out with us tomorrow afternoon. Hey, maybe if you're good enough we'll keep you as a part of the night force, that is, if Une over there doesn't kill you with those tests of hers."

"I would like that," I said, smiling. I turned to Quatre, who was also smiling. He reached over and took my hand and, for the first time in my life, everything felt like it was going to be okay.


	39. Duo38

Duo POV

With the uproar the castle was in you would think there was an entire nation coming to stay, not one scrawny princess and her butler. Man, I have got to find out how she does it! How the heck can one princess manage to cause so much excitement? I could set off bombs without causing this much commotion!

It wasn't really that she was a bad person, or a snob, or stuck up that caused the staff to be on such high alert. Relena was raised as a Princess, she was so used to having things that the rest of us didn't require. Even Quatre, whose family was quite well-to-do, had never been raised as royalty. Treize was pretty much a ruler by default, and we all know that my background doesn't leave much room for complaining.

Also, Relena is and always has had a lot of political sway despite her small county. People tend to listen to her, because she always proposes the moral right. No matter how stupid the idea is, like the time she proposed everyone should destroy all their weapons and never fight again, it is morally right. In her mind, no weapons means no wars, right? Luckily for us, her brother interceded before she suggested that plan to remind her that, even if we agreed to it, bad people would still have weapons. And there would still be wars even if the soldiers had to fight hand to hand.

Relena's still revising that idea. I shudder to think if she ever finishes it. The girl's a good politician, she just doesn't have a lot of common sense and she's extremely sheltered. That's probably what made her a good politician.

Other than the feeling of impending doom caused by Relena's arrival, everything else was going smoothly. Trowa had become a full-time member of the Night Force, and Wufei had become something of a reserve. Wufei was way to busy being Master O's apprentice to be a full time member, but he was always willing to help if we needed him.

I think it helped Trowa's confidence a bit, earning a place in the night force. Like Heero, and me before him, Trowa seemed like he was feeling a bit left out, like he wasn't sure if he really had a place here or not. Which doesn't mean we gave him his spot on the force, he earned it, just saying that, in my opinion, it was good for him to have something to do while Quatre was away. He even joined a knife throwing team, something Quatre nearly put a stop to. Not to say that I wouldn't have a heart attack if someone stuck Heero up on a board and threw daggers at him, since members of the team took turns letting other skilled members throw knives at them. Both Heero, Catherine, the leader of the team, and I had to use a group effort to convince Quatre to let Trowa stay on the team. Eventually Quatre did concede, but he wasn't at all happy about it.

Wufei also seemed to get more confident as time went on. Healing Trowa's face did a lot to assure Wufei that not all magic was bad and he stopped cringing every time he was asked to preform a spell. Despite Wufei reluctance to preform spells, Master O commented on how strong Wufei was, saying he might surpass even Master O's skill when fully trained.

Quatre got along well with Wufei, sharing both he and Trowa's love of books. Heero and Wufei also hit it off, both being quite apt at the martial arts that, while my fighting skills are about as good, I have no sense of the style of martial arts. Heero and Wufei teamed up to try and teach me for a while, but I just couldn't get in to the repetition of it all. After a bit we all decided it was best if I just stick with what I know. If it isn't broke, don't fix it.

Wufei and I also got along well. Wufei was so easy to get riled up, and I actually think he started to like chasing me down the halls, spewing threats. I was an enigma for Wufei, he was always on the lookout for on of my embarrassing but harmless tricks.

Heero and Trowa hit it off better than Trowa and me for a long time. Trowa's very quiet and it takes a directness that I don't possess to talk with Trowa until he gets to know you. I just couldn't get into a conversation with the guy. Heero's first twelve conversations with him went like this:

"Do you like Haven?"

"...Yes."

"Have you joined the knife throwing team?"

".........Yes."

"Are you any good?"

"....Yes."

"Were you ever on a team like that before?"

"......No."

"Who taught you?"

"...............Trowa Barton."

"You father?"

"...No."

Ugh! It was worse than when Heero was trying to ignore me! Probably the thing that came between me and Trowa the most was that, because he is so shy, I always felt the need to try and talk to him. It... intimidated him. I guess he didn't understand me or something. Maybe I was just coming on too strong. Anyway, it took a gentle reprimand from Heero and a while of just leaving well enough alone to get Trowa to come around. Once he stopped thinking that I was trying to get to be friends with him for some sinister reason he stopped being so defensive around me. It also helped that Heero put in a good word for me and that Quatre wanted all of us to be friends.

All in al, we became an extremely close group of friends in the month or so it took for Relena to arrive.

Unfortunately, this month wasn't all about tightening friendships, it was also about shaking, if not breaking, alliances. Treize, via magical transportation that Master O could now use with the extra energy loaned by Wufei, teleported back to China to have a meeting with the emperor. It... did not go well. The emperor flat out refused to believe that Noventa was trying anything against his allies, nor did he believe that Noventa had plotted against Wufei and his family to gain their castle. He even went as far as to blame Wufei for his own family's death. Without the emperor's approval our forces couldn't make a move against Noventa without it being seen as an offense against Chian, and we really did not want to be at war with China. So we were stuck with beefing up security around the castle and around that part of the countryside.

We were all on the lookout for spies and mercenaries that traveled into our territory. It wasn't too long ago that we had finished our last war, so we were still pretty strong in the army department. Lady Une hadn't let her troops go soft, if anything they were stronger than they had been before. Still, we were worried. We weren't sure what our enemy had up his sleeve and that made us all nervous.

Relena made her appearance on a crisp morning in late winter. We were expecting an early summer, otherwise Relena probably would have had to wait an extra couple of weeks before making the journey. As it was it was still bitter cold outside but there weren't any snowstorms about to interrupt Relena's flight. And, yes, Relena did fly. Though I doubt, if it weren't for the inhumane principles, that she would have gotten a bunch of demons together to fly her here on some kind of platform. At least she wasn't spoiled enough to ride all the way in a coach. She had a little more sense than that.

I never really had a problem with Relena. To tell the truth, we kind of avoided each other. The princess rubbed me the wrong way and I knew that I would somehow manage to offend her with the honest way I talked and my slight accent. She, on the other hand, never really bothered much with me, like I wasn't worth holding a conversation with.

Let me get the record clear. Relena was a snot, that's for sure, she was spoiled and accustomed to being treated like royalty. Her ideals, though childish and improbable, are what made her a good leader, since her goals were always toward the betterment of her people. Which is why Milliardo gave up his place under the crown to her; he had seen too much bloodshed after their parents had died to lead with such noble ideals. It's also why he changed his name to Zechs, though god knows where he came up with that name. Then again, Roger really wouldn't fit... Maybe Toni? Or Max? Maybe Mark? ... Maybe Zechs was a pretty good choice after all.

Anyway, my biggest concern about Relena's arrival was the fact that this was the first time she would be visiting without her brother. Without Zechs around there was really no one she would listen to other than Treize, and she only listened to him partially. That made for a very delicate situation, but it was necessary for Wufei and Treize and Quatre and Trowa to get their links upped. Relena was the only option.

Relena arrived with only her personal assistant, an older man by the name of Paragon, as her usual custom. Quatre, Trowa, Treize, Wufei, Master O, Une, Sally, Heero and I all met her like normal in the main hall. The only difference was the absence of her brother and Noin. Greetings and introductions were exchanged and we all went off to a lunch in the grand hall to welcome Relena.

The only difference came when one of our border scouts came to announce that they had found a trespasser trying to cross China's border. The prisoner was in transit and would arrive in half an hours' time.

Needless to say, lunch was just a bit hurried. Even Relena insisted on seeing the interrogation, saying that if Russia was attacked her country would be in jeopardy too.

I'm sure Relena has never eaten that fast in her life, though it didn't seem all that fast to me. We all trekked to Master O's tower, since O and Sally wold be administering the interrogation, and I caught Relena giving Heero some rather intense looks while we were walking. Not that I could blame her, I mean, Heero's got a body like a greek god, but I had the overwhelming urge to stake my claim on him. I think Relena got the picture when I walked directly between the two, her behind, me in the middle and a bit to the side, and Heero in front, and grabbed a fistful of his ass. I thought Relena would just die right then and there, but Heero only turned and gave me that one raised eyebrow look. I muttered something about, "claiming my territory," and he turned away, shaking his head. The way I saw it, I had just got a two pointer. Showed up princess prissy and copped a feel all in one. Score!

We split up before our little group was half way to Master O's tower. Sally and Une headed to the infirmary. Sally needed to check on the prisoner and make sure we wouldn't kill him during the interrogation. Une needed to question the guards who had caught the prisoner and get al the details she could.

The rest of our group would sit in on the interrogation. Quatre was needed for his empathic skill and where Quatre goes, Trowa goes. Heero and I were there in case something went wrong and they needed some backup. Master O would cast truth spells with Wufei watching and learning. Treize was needed because it was his country. And Relena... well, no one really needed Relena, but no one was about to tell her she couldn't come either.

We all arranged ourselves in Master O's small room. Master O busied himself with setting things up and talking with Wufei. Fei listened intently, I think he was starting to like the whole magic thing, once he finally got it through that head of his that it wasn't sinister or evil.

The prisoner arrived a few minutes later, tied down to a stretcher and wheeled in by two soldiers. It was a girl, which was not expected, though not really surprising. Girls were often at a disadvantage physically to men because their bodies were weaker, but whatever they lacked in strength they made up for in viscousness, cunning, and stubbornness. They made excellent spies and warriors, if you could manage to keep them under control.

The girl on the stretcher contrasted Relena in just about every way. While they both had blonde hair, Relena's was a mellow, golden blonde, while the other girl's was a sharp, yellow blonde. While Relena had soft, blue eyes, the girl had sharper, greener eyes that moved quickly and took in everything, soldier style. Relena's clothes were clean and immaculately pressed, while the other girls top and skirt was ripped, muddied, and bloodied around the elbows and knees. Relena's feature's were delicate and smooth, passive and graceful, like a cat's. The other's were strong and slender, quick and lithe like a panther. Even their eyebrows were contrasting, Relena's were small and delicate while the other's were sharp and bold, kind of weird too...

The girl looked... nervous. Not terrified, like some did, but not apathetic like other's tried to portray. She kept he face proud and stead and I had to give her credit for it. It was a damn good performance. If only her hair had covered that little spot on her neck that was throbbing like mad with her heart, she would have pulled off the whole, "I'm not scared," thing. But it was easy to see from her pulse, she was terrified.

It almost made me want to reassure her. We weren't bad people. We weren't going to torture her. Master O's interrogation process was foolproof and damn near painless, as long as on cooperated. The spell was worded so that, as long as one told the truth and answered the questions asked, there would be no pain. It only hurt if someone tried to resist. That way we didn't hurt someone who had just been in the wrong place at the wrong time and we didn't have to deal with false confessions.

The straps holding the girl were placed so that she couldn't move an inch. Her arms and legs were strapped to the rails of the stretcher and her head was intricately tied so that she couldn't move it. About the only thing she could move was her mouth.

Master O was talking to Wufei in low tones about the currents of the body as he pulled out one of his paintbrushes and some special ink. The paintbrushes weren't anything special, though I could swear he had cast a spell on them 'cause they tickled like hell. It was mostly the paint and the symbols painted that cast the spell. The paint was made of some special mineral that easily conducted the flow of magic and the symbols were meant to focus the mind and concentrate the energy on the spell.

The end result was that Master O painted big, funky symbols on the surprised girl's face, wrists, and ankles. I whispered something naughty to Heero about painting him and he smacked me upside the head. How come Master O got to have all the fun? Though Wufei would be taking over soon... maybe there was a way for me to get a hold of the magic paint. Anyone know a super-hot-kinky-love-night spell for someone's somewhat shy lover? Shy around everyone else, a nymphomaniac around me. Not that I minded I minded in the least...

Caught in my own musings, I had completely missed Master O casting the spell, but it really didn't matter. I couldn't understand a damn thing he said anyway.

"Girl," Treize said, stepping forward and taking on his, "I'm the king and you better damn well do as I say," face, "What is your name?"

"I won't tell you a thing!" the girl hissed. She screeched as the pain started to hit her. I must give her credit, after the pain started she held out a lot longer than I thought she would.

"My name is Dorothy," she said finally, her brow covered in sweat. Relena, standing a bit toward the back, looked almost sick and I had a sudden epiphany that Zechs would probably not have let her watch the interrogation. Morbidly, I wondered if she'd faint or puke.

"Why were you crossing the border into China?"

"It's not like it's illegal or anything!" Dorothy spat, evading the question.

"It is not illegal, however it is suspicious that a lone girl would cross the border in the middle of the night. All we need to know is what you were doing, if you are guilty of no treason, you are free to go."

"I've done nothing wrong!" the girl yelled, pulling against her restraints.

"Then tell us what you were doing," Treize said patiently, "I promise that, once you tell us, no harm will come to you. You will be under my protection."

But the girl wouldn't' break. We sat there for nearly ten minutes while she screamed and writhed, suffering by her own stubbornness. On the upside, Relena finally lost her lunch out the window and I won five bucks from Heero because of it. Though she still wouldn't leave the room.

When Dorothy finally gave in, there was a sudden silence. Her screams stopped suddenly and she lay there panting for a moment.

"I'll tell you," she whispered, her voice hoarse, "I-..."

She was suddenly cut off as spasm wracked her body, causing it to try and twist in the restraints.

"What's going on?" Relena shrieked from her corner, "She said she'd tell you, stop hurting her!"

"It's not us!" Master O shouted back, "It must be a different spell interacting with this one! Let me get my book..." he said, turning to his workbench. I moved closer to the stretcher, wondering what the hell I should do. I brushed elbows with Wufei, who had also moved, and felt Heero step up behind me. Quatre and Trowa had gone to try and help Master O and Relena was barely managing to keep herself standing in her corner. Dorothy was oddly silent, making no noise other than her whimpers and small cries, but her eyes were wide with pain.

It was sudden, the appearance of the second symbol. It rose up from underneath the black one Master O had painted. It was blood red in color, slightly glowing as it seemed to paint itself onto her forehead. Dorothy let out another small cry and Wufei took a surprised gasp.

"It's a self-destruct spell!" he yelled, putting his hand on Dorothy's forehead. A red light peaked out from under his and Heero pulled me away from the scene. Wufei started chanting and Dorothy let out a scream that reverberated of the walls and Relena's wail of horror joined it.

Everything seemed to freeze for a minute. Master O half turned and looking at Wufei. Quatre, holding a book in one hand also looking toward the center of the commotion. Trowa had dropped his book and it lay open on the ground as he stepped in front of Quatre to defend him. Treize was starting toward Wufei with a worried look on his face while Wufei, still with his hand on Dorothy's forehead, was in the middle of a chant. Relena was in her corner, a wail coming from her throat though there were, surprisingly, no tears on her face. All I could see of Heero was the arm he had wrapped around my waist as he pulled us both out of the way.

And then there was something like a tangible snap and everything started up again. Dorothy's scream cut off sharply and Wufei fell backwards in exhaustion only to be caught by Treize. Heero finished getting us out of the way just in time for Master O to rush by us.

Treize gently lowered Wufei to the ground as Master O kneeled beside them. After a moment, Wufei blinked his eyes open.

"Are you alright, little dragon?" Treize whispered.

"I'm fine," Wufei replied, then after receiving a scolding look said, "I'm just a bit tired. What about her?"

Master O stood and looked over Dorothy. I was surprised to see that, while all our attentions had been turned to Wufei, Relena had moved to stand by Dorothy.

"I think she's alright," Relena whispered, "just a little shocked." Master O nodded and proceeded to look into her eyes and check her pulse, like Sally would have.

"Master," Wufei called from the floor, "The spell I intercepted, it was some kind of self-destruct spell. I kept it from killing her, but I think her memories might be gone."

"I doubt that," Master O said, a stern look coming over his face, "Dorothy, tell us what you were doing at the border."

The girl, formerly so stoic, looked about to pee herself. You could see her shaking and her eyes, now wide and confused, were quickly filling with tears.

"I-I don't know. I... What border? I-I don't remember anything before... before coming up here on this... this bed. I'm sorry, but I... I don't know," she said, her voice quivering. All at once it was like Dorothy's words had let the air out of Master O, because his shoulders slumped and he deflated.

"I though as much," he sighed, "Well, we'll have to keep her around and see if her memories come back."

"And get her out of these bonds," Relena ordered, her tone tired. I looked to Treize, who nodded, before Heero and I moved forward and untied Dorothy, who at once sat up and drew her legs in, leaning toward Relena. Relena gently put an arm around Dorothy, pulling her into an embrace that Dorothy eagerly accepted.

"Someone will have to watch her, be with her all the time," Master O suddenly declared, "At least until she gets her memories back. We don't know much about her, we'll just have to keep an eye on her."

"Who can we get to do it? All my trusted officers are already overworked and I can't leave her in the hands of a common soldier..." Treize protested.

"Get those nuns to watch her."

"With all the kids around? They can barely keep track of all of them now."

"I'll do it," Relena piped in, "I don't have a whole lot to do while I'm here, I can watch her."

"Relena, I'm not so sure that's a good idea," protested Treize, "She is the enemy, after all."

"Please," Relena scoffed, "She doesn't remember a thing. She's practically helpless. Besides, who else has the time to watch her?"

"Your majesty, if may?" Master O interrupted, "Relena does seem to pose the perfect solution to our problem. If I place a spell on the girl to keep her from being able to attack anyone, I think it should be alright."

"No!" Dorothy burst our in a frightened exclamation, "No more spells, please! I won't hurt anyone!"

"Yes," Relena agreed, "are you absolutely sure this spell is necessary?"

"Absolutely," Treize decided, "I'm still not sure about leaving her with you, but she is absolutely not leaving this room without a spell on her. It's either the spell or she spends her time in the dungeon."

Relena and Dorothy exchanged a look, Dorothy giving Relena a pleading one and Relena looking helplessly at the other girl.

"It's alright," Relena crooned softly, "They aren't going to hurt you..."

"Oh no," Dorothy shot angrily, "I was screaming because they were tickling me."

"Dorothy," Master O interjected quietly, "You really don't have a choice in the matter. Whether you remember or not, you were our enemy and we still must treat you as such until you have proven yourself a friend. Do you understand?"

The glare Dorothy gave him could probably have melted a normal person into a puddle of mud, but it didn't even phase Master O. After a moment, Dorothy nodded in grudging assent. Master O moved forward and placed his hand on Dorothy's head and quickly did the chanting thing. Master O puts what we call a "helpless spell" on prisoners fairly often so that they don't attack their guards, so he didn't even need to bother with the magic paint.

What the spell pretty much did was make it so that the person couldn't attack their guard or any other person. If they thought about it, they fainted and wouldn't remember what they were thinking about when they woke up. It also kept them from going beyond fifty yards away from their guard. It was one of the most helpful spells Master O had come up with.

It didn't even take a full minute for the spell to be cast. Master O pulled away and Dorothy looked at him in surprise.

"It is done," he said, turning to Relena, "You may take her with you where ever you go, but do not leave the castle grounds. And you," he said, turning to Treize, "Take Wufei and put him to bed, that spell he cast has tired him out."

"Master..." Wufei protested, but Treize silenced him by lifting him into his arms.

"Come, let's get you to bed," Treize told him, heading for the door. Wufei looked about ready to explode.

"I'm not a child Treize Kushrenada! Put me the hell down, I can walk, dammit!"

They continued in this strain all the way down the stairs, Wufei screaming like a banshee and Treize paying him no mind. I made a point to rush to the door and yell, "Let him get a little sleep, you pervert!" down the stairs. Treize called back something, but I couldn't make it out over Wufei's ranting.

"Come On, Dorothy," Relena said, "Let's go get you cleaned up. You look like you've had a rough time."

Relena helped Dorothy up and out of the room, letting Dorothy lean on her for support.

"Well," I said as the two girls descended down the stairs, "hasn't today just been full of surprises?"


	40. Relena39

Relena POV

It made me sick.

The whole process, from taking that poor, frightened, helpless girl away from her family, to the very end, where she almost died. I was even violently ill halfway through, something that, I believe, amused Duo very much.

It hurt a bit. Now that my brother was gone, I was hoping that I could show everyone that I'd become stronger without him. Being forcefully shown that I hadn't come as far as I thought I had was not a pleasant experience.

The girl, Dorothy, was strong. I could tell as soon as they brought her in. She didn't have the poise of a queen, but there was something in her eyes that showed the spirit. Something I had never seen in my eyes was displayed in hers, and I was almost jealous. But there was also sadness in those eyes, and loneliness. Something in me wanted to demand that they let this girl go, that they stop hurting her, but I knew better. So close to war, any person that could give Treize an advantage had to be used.

I had never had to order war, but I had seen many when I was too young to rule and I knew the kind of courage it took to demand war. I knew that sometimes it was necessary, but the people couldn't understand that. If I told my people that there was a time when we could go to war, they would want to go for every small indiscretion. They were like children, always ready to bicker. It was only by a steadfast resolve to remain pacifist under all conditions that I kept my people from provoking wars. My brother understood this, though I sometimes wonder if he was the only one.

When that horrible experience was finally over, I insisted that Dorothy come with me. I had seen her strength and, though she had become understandably frightened and confused, that strength I had seen had not diminished. Neither, I saw, had the loneliness and pain. I wanted to make sure, if nothing else, that no one made that pain worse.

I had to nearly carry Dorothy down the stairs. She was exhausted and I would have carried her had I been able, but I wasn't strong enough and I didn't dare ask for the aid of anyone else. Treize did not like leaving me close to someone he thought of as an enemy, I didn't want to give him an excuse to take Dorothy away. I wasn't sure if she was or was not an enemy, but I knew that she didn't deserve to spend her time in a prison. Actually, I was kind of leaning toward believing she was an enemy, there was too much circumstantial evidence to be ignored, which is why I let them put that last spell on her. Still, enemy or not, she was a person and deserved to be treated with kindness.

I took Dorothy directly to my room and let her lay down on the bed. Her knees and elbows would need cleaned, but even I could see that they were only scrapes. After everything she had been through that day, I knew the first thing she would need was a nap to settle her nerves. Then a bath. Definitely a bath.

It was almost two hours before Dorothy awoke again. Not that I blamed her, after all she had gone through. I waited patiently, reading a book of poems in the chair by the bed. I didn't want her to wake up alone. When she finally did wake she sat up and gazed around the room, confused. I put my book aside and went to her.

"Hello," I said quietly, sitting on the bed beside her. She studied me, my face most closely, seeming to attempt to read my intentions. I smiled warmly. "Do you know where you are?" She could only shake her head. "This is Haven, the capitol of Russia. Do you have any idea where you're from or why you're here?"

"I can't seem to remember anything," she said quietly, deep in thought and trying to pull her elusive memories forward. She seemed worried.

"It's alright," I told her, "I didn't expect you to remember, not after that spell..."

"That's right!" she cried, leaping to her feet, "You cast a spell on me! You all did! You took my memories! I demand you give them back!" she yelled.

"No!" I cried, "We didn't! We-..."

"Where's that sorcerer? I'll make him return my memories!" she said, heading for the door. I intercepted her, fearing she would go rambling into the halls, her temper in a flare, and end up in trouble.

"Get out of my way!" she yelled, her face turning a deep red with rage.

"Calm down and listen to me!" I replied, raising my voice to try to get through to her.

It happened so quickly that I barely even registered what happened. One minute she was screaming at me, just an inch away from trying to push me out of the way, the next her eyes closed and she was dropping to the floor. I managed to catch her, barely, and struggled to pull her limp body back to the bed. I was relieved to feel her breathing normally as I pushed her upper half then her lower half onto the bed and pulled the covers up around her. Still, I was worried. What could have caused her to faint like that?

Quickly, I walked to the door and sent Paragon to fetch Sally. I forced myself not to pace the room as I waited, knowing that it could be a while before Sally had the time to come check on Dorothy. I picked up my poems and tried to read them, but found myself contemplating the figure on the bed instead. It was odd. I knew less about her than almost anyone else and still I felt drawn to her. And she didn't even know my name yet, let alone who I was.

When the knock at my door finally came, I eagerly opened it, however it was not Sally standing outside, but Duo.

"Hey Princess," he called with his unsophisticated charm. Duo was puzzle to me. Why would anyone of such a high rank speak the way he did? For a time I thought he was merely daft, but he proved to be quite intelligent several times and I had to abandon that theory. I believe this puzzlement from me was what caused the rift between us. But it wasn't completely my fault. Oh, to think that I didn't notice that I was the only one he didn't prank or joke with? Without even getting to know me he had assumed that I would throw a fit if salt somehow ended up in my sugar or red dye in my shampoo. I believe that was the thing that came between us most; we both assumed things about each other that weren't necessarily true and neither of us had managed to change those assumptions.

"So," he asked, "Where's Dorothy?"

"There, in the bed. She fainted and I don't know why. I called for Sally but..."

"Sally sent me. We both have a pretty good idea of what caused the girl to faint," he said, brushing passed me into the room. On the bed, Dorothy was still asleep, still except for the rise and fall of her chest. Duo paused for a moment in front of her.

"I know you're awake," he said. Dorothy's eyes popped open an instant later.

"How did you know?" she asked, mirroring my own question.

"You were too still," he said with a slight grin, "People aren't completely still when they sleep."

"So, what's wrong with me? Are fainting spells a part of that spell you placed on me? Or is this something from my past that I simply don't remember, again because of you."

Duo made himself comfortable, jumping up and sitting cross-legged at the end of Dorothy's bed. Dorothy copied his actions by sitting up, pushing aside the covers, and sitting cross-legged in a most unladylike manner. I chose to sit in a close chair, unable to bring myself to copy their uncultured actions.

"First off, I didn't put a spell on you, so don't go getting mad at me," Duo said, staring at Dorothy, leaving me forgotten in my own little corner. I was used to such treatment, it happened often when my brother was around. Just on more thing I had sought to change in his absences, but... Ah well. Some things never change, I supposed. "And even if I had," Duo continued, "There wouldn't be any reason to be angry at me. Wufei was the one that did this to you, if you need to blame someone for this. He saved your life, but he couldn't save your memories. Someone else put a self-destruct spell on you and, even though we believed you an enemy, we saved you. I know you don't remember anything about being our enemy, but we can't risk letting you go until we know more about you. Wufei and Master O are going to be working on a spell to get your memories back. Until we find that you're not our enemy or you get your memories back, you are sentenced to remain here in Haven with Relena. If you attempt to escape or try to hurt Relena or anyone else you will faint as you did today. If this happens too much, you will spend your time here in the dungeon. I know this seems unfair, but there are a lot worse ways you could spend your sentence. Any questions?"

Dorothy was silent, in a sense of shock, I believe. I was also in shock, though not for the same reason. It surprised me that Duo, a person that I had thought merely a cleaver prankster, could remain serious for so long a time. It made me wonder if I had judged him too hastily.

After a while, Dorothy shook her head, implying that she had no more questions. Though I doubted that she had no more questions, I was aware that she knew Duo didn't have the answers she was seeking, so she was silent. Duo rose and left, leaving the two of us together.

"Come," I told her, getting up from my chair to lead her from the bed to the bathroom, "I'm sure you'd like to be clean."

Dorothy took my offered hand, allowing me to leader her, in her dream-like state, to the bathroom. My private bath was one of the few luxuries I allowed myself to take to an extreme. Instead of the common shower, I had an enormous bath, one that could easily fit three or four people in water that came up to my breastbone.

It was instantly evident that Dorothy was too distracted to bathe alone. After her recent ordeal, then the fainting spell, then that last revelation, I was not going to allow her to be alone in deep water. I was especially afraid of the fainting spells. What would happen is, while she was in the bath, she just happened to think of escape? She would faint and drown, I couldn't allow that.

So, as I prompted Dorothy to remove her own clothes, I also removed mine. Dorothy seemed a bit surprised by this, though not overly shocked considering the size of the bath. I, for my part, was fairly used to the more public bathing that I often encountered in other and even my own country.

I tried not to look at Dorothy while we got into the bath, feeling something like a voyeur, but it was impossible not to see her so long as I didn't close my eyes, a tempting thought, but an impractical one.

Dorothy was beautiful. Oh, not in the petite, delicate way, as I was, but in a more buxom way. Where my features were thin and soft, hers were more muscled and curvy. Her body spoke of her nature, strong and confident.

I tried not to be jealous. It wasn't her fault that she was a confident person any more than it was mine that I wasn't strong or confident. I suppose it was the situation, really. I wondered briefly if I had grown up in a place where my brother wasn't constantly sheltering me I would have been more bold. Still, I couldn't be angry at my brother for protecting me, he did it only out of love.

As we washed, Dorothy began to hum a tune. Soon, coaxed by the water and my silence, she began to sing quietly. Her voice was soft and sweet and, as soon as I caught the rhythm of the song, began to sing along. Her alto matched my soprano perfectly and we sang together as we finished the bath and got out.

"You have a lovely voice," Dorothy commented as we were dressing.

"As do you," I replied. She frowned slightly.

"You know, I'm not your enemy right now. You don't have to be so cold."

"I don't understand," I said, truly confused.

"You hide behind you politeness, don't think I can't see it. I may not be your friend, but I wish you wouldn't keep me at such a distance. I don't know what I was like before, but I'm sure I'm not going to report your hair-care secrets to whoever sent me," she said, frowning in an angry manner, then stormed into the other room.

I wasn't sure how to react. No one had ever seen me as cold before... at least, no one had ever said it. I wasn't sure I knew how to give her what she wanted. She wanted me to act normal, and not so uptight. What she didn't understand is I had never acted another way. My life had just been one big political maneuver after another. I had been taught to make allies, not friends. While my brother was off forming bonds with his military friends in the wars, I had been in a boardroom with men fifty years my seniors, trying to keep my head above the water as they tried to trick me into betraying my country and myself. My mask of politeness was as much a part of me as my skin, the thought of taking it off was akin to asking someone to remove their own face.

Quietly, I followed Dorothy into the other room. She didn't look at me as I went to sit beside her, simply stared at the mirror beside the bed.

"I'm sorry if I offended you..." I started, but Dorothy only frowned harder, "What I mean is, I don't think of you as an enemy. I... I'm not used to speaking plainly, that's all. It-it's sort of second nature for me to be polite and aloof, I'm sorry if I made you think I was angry at you or something."

"What do you mean, second nature?" she questioned, her frown now in puzzlement, "Who are you, really?"

"I'm the princess of the Sanq Kingdom, soon to be the queen. I've grown up in political functions, so I'm just used to speaking like this-... I mean, like that."

"But certainly you had someone you could talk to without being all high-class like that."

"There was my brother... but he left when I was young and hardly came to see me. My parents, stepparents actually, were always busy with running my country and their own in my brother and my absence. They didn't have a lot of time for me. Other than that I was around other children who were trained to be polite to me, because I would eventually be very powerful as an ally or enemy. I couldn't make friends because the other children were afraid of me because of what their parents told them. So..." I forced myself to shrug, something uncharacteristic of me but common for other people. My instincts were telling me to finish my sentence, to make a better point, to apologize for something, but I knew that would come off cold and polite, so I was quiet.

"Perhaps you can make friends now," she told me gently, "it isn't too late. You can start with me. I'll be you friend and tell you when you seem to be getting distant. And Duo, he seems normal enough. Watch what he does and maybe you'll start to see how not to be aloof," she said, then yawned, "I'm so tired. Maybe I should..."

"Come on," I told her gently, "let's get you to bed. I bet it feels good to be clean, it will feel even better when you rested."

"Night, Relena," she said, closing her eyes with a soft smile on her face. She was so beautiful like that.

Over the next few days, Dorothy set about her goal with a fervent ambition. Gone was the shy, frightened girl I had seen at our first meeting, Dorothy set to teaching me how to get close to people with an overwhelming enthusiasm. It began with small tips on how to be less distant, and graduated to her smacking me upside the head every time I treated our friendship like a strategic alliance. It was difficult for me, but it was also a bit of a challenge.

Beyond that, Dorothy's company wasn't exactly an abhorred presence. Aside from my annoyance at my own lack of ability to change, I loved being around Dorothy. She was my one true friend, with no strings attached.

Duo, oddly enough, was extremely helpful on my road to becoming normal. Though I still couldn't understand why he would choose to act the way he did, I was beginning to understand that this was the way most people acted around friends, unguarded and slightly silly. When I was watching him from afar, hidden so that no one knew I was there, the people around him would also drop their polite facades and join in his cheer and jokes. It was only when I was around that Duo was alone in his glee, something that I was slowly coming to resent. It seemed even Quatre and Heero, who I had branded properly behaved like me, relaxed around Duo. Especially with Quatre, who had also been raised a noble upbringing, it felt something like a betrayal.

I was finally starting to get the hang of the whole, "friendly" thing when Duo showed up at my door.

"Hey," he said, his customary little smile on his face, "Wufei says he might have a way to restore Dorothy's memories. He wants you both to come to the tower."

I signaled for Paragon and asked him to get Dorothy for me. As he moved off, I turned to go back into my room, but Duo caught my arm.

"Sorry," he said, quickly dropping my arm as though I would round on him and scream or bite or something, "I just wanted to ask you something. I noticed you've been watching me and... look, if you.... I won't.... I'm not going to let you get to Heero, alright? He's mine, so back off."

It took a full three seconds for that to sink in, but when it did I threw my head back and laughed.

Yes, I had been interested in Heero. He was handsome, intense, and mysterious. Of course I had been interested, but I was not willing to break apart what Duo had so aptly shown was a deep relationship. It was like trying to break apart Trowa and Quatre, Wufei and Treize, or even Une and Sally, though the two of them still thought I was ignorant of their relation. The point being that I hadn't even talked to the boy, I wasn't about to make war with Duo over him.

"I'm sorry to have given you that idea, but taking Heero from you was not my intention at all."

Duo looked confused now and a little shocked at my actions. To tell the truth, even I would have been shocked at my actions not two weeks ago, but I was starting to learn how to relax.

"So... why have you been watching me?" he asked and it was my turn to be surprised. I probably should have expected that question, but for some reason I had overlooked it. I felt my face color slightly.

"I... You see, I'm... Well, I thought that..." and for probably the first time in my life, I couldn't seem to find the right words to say. I wasn't sure how to explain what I had been doing without sounding like a complete fool. What if he thought I was a moron? Or worse yet, a cold, uncaring witch? I had never had to worry about those kinds of emotions when I was making speeches, but when I was saying what I truly felt... It was a whole different story.

"Just spit it out," Duo said more warmly than he had ever been before. Perhaps there was hope that he could see the good side of me.

"I want to know how to talk to people," I said quietly. Duo frowned, even more confused.

"What? Relena, you're..."

"I know, I'm a great speaker, but only to crowds and politicians. I don't know how to relax and just talk to people, I always come off sounding so cold... Dorothy pointed out to me how cold I was being. I had noticed it before, but I never really knew how to stop it. She's-she's been helping me, but I needed to see someone else do it too, not just her, so I..." I trailed off, my head bent in embarrassment.

"Have I helped?" Duo asked and I was so surprised that I looked up at him, only to se him grinning warmly from ear to ear. "You should have said something. I always just assumed that you didn't want to be friends or something. If you just want to be friends, I have no problem helping you out with that. And here I thought you were plotting to get rid of me or something."

"No!" I gasped, appalled that he would think such a thing of me, a pacifist leader.

"You know," Duo commented, gaining my attention once again, "Dorothy isn't exactly horrible-looking. And I think she's got a thing for you. How about it?" he asked. I could only stand there in shock.

I had noticed Dorothy's behavior, the odd little looks she gave me and the way most of her words seemed to have a double meaning to them. I was pretty certain by the excited little patter of my heart that the sentiment was returned, but...

"It's scary," Duo said, mirroring my thoughts.

"How did you...?" I wondered. It was scary. I had always assumed that any marriage I might have would be more of a political alliance than anything, love was never a factor. I think that might have been a part of what attracted me to Heero, that some part of me knew that he was out of reach. Now, with Dorothy so easy to reach out to, I was frightened that I might make a mistake and have no one to blame but myself.

"With Heero, remember? I know how scary it is to fall in love. I know it's scary, but it's worth it. If you're truly in love, it's more than worth the risk."

"What about... what about her memories? What if she hates me when she remembers?"

"You won't be able to link yet, so I really wouldn't worry about that. Otherwise I'd say to just go along as you have been and worry about it when it comes along."

"But that's stupid!" I burst out, covering my mouth as soon as the words left it. Duo would hate me for saying that, but I couldn't see how worrying about it later was going to help. My political training had forced me to think of every aspect and plan for every possible outcome.

Oddly enough, when I looked back at Duo, he was grinning.

"One of the perks of having friends," he explained, "is that you're supposed to tell them exactly what you think, just as they're supposed to tell you what they think without sugarcoating it. And if you really are trying to be like normal people you need to stop thinking you can plan for everything. You know you can't, so don't worry about it. Most people live their lives one day at a time, it's a lot simpler than your method."

"But I-... What if something goes wrong?"

"This isn't like politicks, Relena. No one can teach you what to do and what not to do, because you're the only one that knows. If you try things out and it isn't right at least you know you've tried and failed, instead of not trying at all."

Dorothy chose this moment to come prancing out of the room, her hair still wet from her shower, and grab me by the arm. She hurried us down the halls, as she does when she's nervous. I could tell from the tenseness in her shoulders as well as her hardened expression that she was frightened, but there was nothing that I could say to consol her. I tightened my hold on her hand, hoping that would lend her some support, and she smiled at me.

It seemed like mere seconds before we reached the tower. The stairs, which always seemed endless, seemed to fly from under our feet and move the tower door closer, so that we arrived in merely seconds. Dorothy stopped at the top of the stairs.

"Miss Relena," she said, something she always calls me when she's nervous, "I just want to tell you that... I don't want to leave you. I don't care what my memories hold now, I-I like it here and I like you and I don't care what my memories show. I want to stay with you..."

If only I could believe her, but the risk was too great. I had to know for sure. Unlike love, this was politic and I had to be sure of my every move.

"I know," I soothed anyway, putting my free hand on her arm, "I know. Be brave and trust us. We will not harm you."

Hesitantly, Dorothy tried to open the door and failed. I would have liked nothing more than to take her hand and lead her back to the bottom of the stairs, but instead my hand went to the doorknob and opened the door. We stepped inside.

The room wasn't nearly as frightening as I had thought it would be. Light streamed in through the windows of the tower, aptly named because it was the only place in the entire underground castle that was actually above ground. Wufei was smiling at something Treize had said as Master O bustled around the room, stringing up fresh herbs. Neither Heero nor Quatre, and obviously not Duo, were present, only Trowa stood in the corner as our solitary guard.

"Ah," Master O said, seeing our arrival, "Let's get this over with so we can get back to your studies, Wufei." Wufei made a face, but moved to Dorothy and I. Gently, Wufei led Dorothy away from me and toward a small table, while Treize lead me into the room and closed the door. Treize began to herd me toward the corner of the room, away from Dorothy, but I wouldn't have it. Determinedly I walked around him and over to where Dorothy was sitting on the table, taking her hand and daring anyone to try and stop me. I was met with no opposition as Treize simply shrugged and Wufei, after giving us an odd look, went back to setting things up. Odd, I would have thought standing up to Treize and everyone required more effort.

Dorothy gave me a grateful look and I smiled back at her, noting just how beautiful her eyes were.

"Let's get started then," Master O said, motioning to Wufei. Wufei turned and ladled a cup of something out of a large pot, handing it to Dorothy.

"Careful," he warned, "it's hot."

Giving a look that one would give to their executioner, Dorothy drank the liquid quickly and handed the cup back. It seemed as though everyone turned their attentions elsewhere at that moment, leaving me with at least the illusion of privacy with Dorothy. I hoisted myself onto the bench next to her, carefully putting an arm around her waist. I was glad to see that she had relaxed a little, but worried again when I noticed the slightly glaze look in her eyes as I pushed a stray strand of hair off of her face. In moments, she sagged against me and I gasped in alarm.

Someone pulled her off of me and pulled me off the table, laying her down in my place. Treize and Wufei managed to make her comfortable as Trowa, I assumed the one who had pulled me out of the way, led me back a few paces so the others could work. Master O and Wufei quickly painted the symbols for the truth spell on her and cast the spell. Dorothy awoke not a minute later and I was visibly able to see Treize switch into leader mode as he stepped up to start the interrogation.

"What is you name?" was the firs question he asked.

"Dorothy," she replied, the same slightly dazed look in her eyes that I had seen when she had first lost her memories.

"Surname?"

"I don't know."

"Tell me, what do you remember of your past?"

"I remember being captured and taken here. I remember being on a mission for my lord. Everything before that is foggy."

"What was your mission?"

"I was to scout the area and report if there were any guards about."

"Who is your master?"

"Master Hing."

"Ah," Treize said, turning to Master O, "Lord Hing. He lives beyond the river, not far from our boarder. If he is allied with Noventa... Dorothy, tell me of Lord Hing's army."

"He has none that I know of."

"Was he making any preparations for war?"

"No."

"Do you know of a man named Noventa?"

"No."

"Why did he send you, a lowly girl like yourself, on such a mission?"

"I do not know. Perhaps I was his most expendable spy."

"So you are a spy?"

"I have been trained as such."

"Have you ever spied before?"

"No."

"Tell me Dorothy, and think well on this, are you still loyal to Hing after being with us for so long? Would you still betray us?"

"No," Dorothy answered without hesitation.

"Are you loyal, if not to us, then to Miss Relena?"

"Yes."

My heart soared so that I didn't even hear most of the questions to follow. I knew that Treize would have no problem letting someone loyal to me stay with me.

I finally came out of my happy daze when Treize finished up, with a warning that Une might come to interrogate her more, and handed Dorothy over to Wufei.

"Now, I want you to tell me how far back you can remember," he said.

"I could only remember a few days before I was caught when I woke up, but I can remember a full week now."

"Excellent. You're memory is going to slowly com back by working itself backwards slowly. It's confusing, but it's much less confusing than having you remember you memories from now and when you were two, but nothing in between. It's going to be slow, but you memories will return. Try to keep stress to a minimum, something that you will be partially responsible for Relena, and be careful of headaches. If you do get a headache Sally will give you something for the pain, but other than that you won't need to come here unless something odd happens. Oh, and I'll remove the truth spell before you leave."

Wufei proceeded to remove the truth spell and we left, under strict orders to take it easy. I took it upon myself to keep Dorothy relaxed, so I herded us both to the bath when we returned, one of the things that Dorothy relaxed most in. Unfortunately it was getting harder and harder for me to conceal how Dorothy made me feel. Good thing I wasn't born a man or it would be more than obvious.

But something was troubling Dorothy. I wanted to know, but I didn't want to pressure her into telling me. Fortunately, her worry made itself known while I brushed out her long, golden hair.

"Relena," she said quietly, "You know... You heard that I'm... that I'm loyal to you. You know I won't betray you even after I... even after my memories come back. I just wanted to tell you that I lov... that I'm loyal to you no matter what. My past can't change how I feel about you, can't change my... my loyalty."

Quietly, I set the brush down and leaned forward, putting my arms around her shoulders.

"I know," I told her, "I love you, too."

Dorothy spun around, surprise and happiness written on her face. In an instant she grabbed my by the shoulders and kissed me and for the first time I knew, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that everything was going to be alright.


	41. Wufei40

Wufei POV

I didn't want to learn to use my magic. I resented the fact that Treize was forcing me to, but understood his reasons better now that Duo had warned me of the tendency of unused magic to become unstable. Still, I loathed the day that I was to begin my magical training.

I never expected to like it.

I believe I... tried Master O's patience on the first day I was to practice magic. It was late in the day and, as a whole, Master O had been quite pleased with my prior knowledge and willingness to learn. This, however, was one thing I wasn't so willing to learn.

It was a fight, more or less a battle of wits and patience, to even get me into the training room. Once inside, I attempted to do nothing more than sulk in a corner. Unfortunately, Master O had other ideas. Every time I would try to sit down or stop paying attention, he'd light a small fire on various parts of my body. It didn't do any real damage, but it stung like hell. Still, I refused to even attempt any spells. He was finally at his wits end when a stray burst of power from his anger at me hit a small bird outside the window.

"What the hell did you do that for?" I asked, picking up the small bird that had fallen in the window and was beating its uninjured wing rapidly, trying to get back into the tree.

"This is what happens when you get angry and don't pay attention to where your magic is going. That was a small burst, even the most well-trained sorcerers are prone to them when they get agitated, but if you refuse to use your magic you could put out a burst that would kill several people."

I lifted the bird, only half listening to Master O's lecture, and examined its wing. There was a deep cut in the wing, going all that way through the bone. It didn't look like any other part of its body was injured, but it was still likely it would die soon. Small birds are notorious for dying from shock from even the smallest of wounds. It was unlikely that the bird would live, and it would never fly again.

"You spoke of healing magic," I ground out, forcing myself to use even my most hated source of help for the little bird, "cast a spell and heal it."

"I won't."

"Why not? It's your fault the bird's hurt in the first place!"

"If you want the bird to live, heal it yourself. I won't do it for you."

I contemplated this. I had no doubt that Master O would let the bird die, if only to test me. Perhaps I could save it, but what of the consequences to my soul? After all, it was only a little bird...

"It's only a bird," I mumbled, "If it is so weak as to die from such a small wound, then it should die."

"Do you really believe that?" Master O asked quietly, "Would you really permit that bird to die when you could easily help it?"

I knew that I couldn't. Slowly, I reached down and covered the bird's wing with my hand, focusing all my energy into that one spot, as Master O had been preaching at me for the past two hours. A tingly sensation, odd but pleasant, moved down my arm. I concentrated hard, it was difficult for me to control the energy, the odd feeling, which was constantly moving and changing shape whilst I tried to control it. Master O was completely forgotten to me and no noise that he made could distract me. I thought I heard him open and close the door, as though he had left, but I put it from my mind. Slowly, like a man wandering a thornbush, I molded that odd, tingly feeling into the wound on the bird. Eventually, after many failed attempts to harness the odd feeling, I felt the feeling condense and a warmth spread under my hands, like I had placed them over fire. Suddenly, the bird squawked and I jumped, dropping the bird. Instead of falling to the floor, as I had thought it would, the bird soared out the window and into the sky.

"I told you he was powerful," I heard Treize's voice say and I whirled around to find Treize standing beside Master O, a proud look on his face. I couldn't understand that look, since I hadn't done anything I felt proud about.

"He is quite powerful indeed," Master O commented, a contemplative look on his face, "I was not sure that he would be able to do a healing spell at such a young age. I was almost certain that he would be unable to harness his power already, I was afraid that he would do more harm than good to the poor bird, but I knew that he would not use his magic unless someone's life was in danger, even someone as small as a sparrow. And I knew that the boy's heart wouldn't let him turn his back on another living being."

"He wouldn't be the boy I fell in love with if he could," Treize said with a smile, then turned to me, "Do you see now that not all magic is bad? It can be used to help people."

"I... am not sure," I told him. I was not yet ready to turn my back on my cultural beliefs, however I was starting to see how magic could be useful to a kingdom. And it didn't _feel_ wrong, just strange.

Over the next few weeks and months I began to learn to use my magic. I was still hesitant at first, but eventually came around. And the relief of pressure, buildup of my magical energy, that came when I finally started using my magic often was a huge relief. Though there were no physical symptoms, it was easy for me to feel that something was wrong with the energies of my body and it was uncomfortable. I was very glad to have everything back in order once again.

Master O, ever cautious, warned me of the drawbacks in using magic, especially to heal. Just as in medicine, if the body rejected the magic we could end up doing more harm than good. Of course, it was more likely that magic would simply refuse to work on someone that could not accept it, thus providing a fail-safe. However, it was still wise to be cautious and only use healing magic when absolutely necessary and completely accepted.

The first time I actually managed to help someone with my magic was when I healed Trowa at our first meeting. Seeing the burns on his face and knowing how painful they must be and that, even if they did heal completely, there would be horrible burns on his face and body, I reached out to heal him without even thinking about it. It was as though my magic wanted to heal him and, since I was not adverse to it, it was a natural reaction for me to reach out and heal him. When I had finished healing him, I realized what I had done and as so surprised that I almost turned tail and ran. I was afraid that Trowa would point and scream sorcerer, as anyone from my home country would. When I turned to leave and he thanked me, I was confused. I was to surprised to be able to comprehend why he was thanking me, but it felt god to be appreciated. Damn good. Later I was able to help Dorothy too, but it didn't feel nearly as good knowing that magic was also the source of her problem, not just the remedy. Trowa was the first person who actually made me think that maybe, just maybe, I was doing something good.

Another thing I found that I enjoyed, though it was not a surprise to anyone, was the beautiful Russian library. I believe there were just as many, or more, books there as to the imperial Chinese library. I also liked the many different cultures from which the books came; there were books in arabic, Chinese, Japanese, French, German, Dutch Italian, and many, many more.

There was also another reason for my extra time in the library. It was a few weeks after I had started my magical training. I was in the library, as had become my custom after Treize left for his morning meetings and before my classes with Master O. I was reading a book on European history, partially curled in one of the chairs near the door. As usual, I as alone in the library, the young librarian had gone off to meet with her newest boyfriend. I was appalled at the girl's lack of ethics, but she kept all the books in excellent shape and, since I did prefer to have the library to myself, I didn't complain. However, on this morning, I heard the library door creek open. Somewhat surprised, I glanced at the door to see a young boy, about the age of nine or ten, hesitantly entering the room. I watched the boy, unaware of my presence, as he gazed in awe at the books around him. Quietly, as though someone would scold him for entering the room he tiptoed to the bookshelf and picked up a book that was far too advanced for his age. As I predicted, he read only a few sentences, then placed the book carefully on the shelf again, being sure to place it in the place he had taken it from. He moved down the line a bit, completely absorbed in the books, then lifted one that seemed to have caught his eye, still advanced for his age but not as much so as the last one. He surprised me by opening it and reading the first page, then the second, then the third. I waited for him to close the book and place it back on the shelf, but he did not. Eventually, like one falling asleep, he settled himself to the floor, reading avidly. It was only when I saw how uncomfortable he was, sitting on the cold, hard, stone floor, his back pressed against the sharp edge of the shelf, that I roused myself to go over to him. The boy was so enthralled by his book that he did not even hear my footsteps, nor notice me when I stood directly in front of him.

"Excuse me..." I said quietly. The boy reacted in a most surprising manner. He jumped to his feet, his eyes going wide with fear and anxiety, and hid the book behind his back, like he was trying to hide what he had done. I raised an eyebrow, scowling slightly at the behavior, looking directly at the corner of the book that peeked out from behind his back. He paled somewhat.

"I was gonna put it back! Honest!" he cried, pulling the book from behind his back slowly, "I just... I mean the title was really neat so I wanted to see what the rest was like and I guess... I guess I wasn't paying attention... I wasn't going to take it, I just... You know, it's like looking at a picture, it doesn't hurt to let everyone look, right? I-I didn't meant to make anyone mad..."

Finally understand what the boy was saying, I let my scowl soften into a rueful smile.

"I merely wanted to ask if you would be more comfortable on one of the couches. These books are here for anyone to read, you are welcome to them if you wish," I told him, then turned and walked away from the slack-jawed boy. As I turned my back and walked around, there was a small scurrying noise behind me. I turned around just in time to see the door slam shut, the book having been carefully replaced on the bookshelf.

The occurrence was odd, but I probably would have put the boy from mind had he not shown again at the very same time the next day. This time, instead of sneaking in, he entered tentatively and sought me out, padding slowly up to my chair to stand in front of me until I noticed him.

"Yes?" I questioned, noting the boy's nervous demeanor.

"I was just wondering... You know, 'cause of what you said yesterday... could I look at a book?" he asked, stumbling over his own words. My curiosity now peaked, I nodded.

"Over there are the children's books," I said, pointing, "Then the young adult books, then adults, then text books. You may look at anything you'd like."

The boy smiled brightly, the first un-hesitant thing I'd seen him do, and rushed off toward the books.

"Be careful with them," I warned, "They're old," but I needed not give the boy such warning. He handled the books as though they were as delicate as butterflies and as precious as gold.

The boy intrigued me, and I decided to find out as much about him as I could. I questioned Treize about him, but received no solid answer from my lover. He suggested I talk with Duo about him, since Duo knew almost all the children in the castle. From Duo, I learned that it was most likely that the boy was from the orphanage and that he was probably hiding out from the Sisters, who taught lessons around that time. He advised me not to worry about it.

The day after that conversation, the boy arrived again at the library at the same time. Glancing around, still nervous but not quite as nervous as before, he spotted me. He hesitated, seeming to be unsure of whether or not to approach me. Slowly he came up to me, his head slightly lowered.

"Is it okay if I look at the books again?" he asked me quietly.

"Why aren't you in school with the nuns?" I questioned. He raised his eyes and I saw a guilty look pass over his features, confirming my suspicions.

"They can't really teach me anything. I'm ahead of the other kids because I'm older and I can read, they don't have time to teach me in a group by myself. They gave me some books to read, but I've already read all of them and didn't want to bother the Sisters with getting me more. I was hoping to find some more books, but..." he glanced around the room in wonder, "...I never imagined I'd find so many. I just want to read some, I'll be really careful if you let me, I promise."

The boy reminded me of a younger, less proud and uptight me, always looking for new books. I must admit, the royal libraries instilled the same wonder in me as they had in the young boy, I had simply been better at hiding it. If he was anything like me he would tear through these books with a voracious appetite. Still, the boy needed some proper schooling, if to do nothing more than teach him which books were worth reading and which were not.

"Your aspiration is admirable; however, you cannot go without proper schooling. Because I understand the plight of the nuns who work here, I will tutor you every day in the library from now until I leave for my own classes."

"Really?" the boy asked, a look of surprise coming to his face.

"I warn you, though, I am not easily pleased. I require a lot of work and... Oof!" I cried as the boy leaped and gave me an impromptu hug. I put my arms around him in a loose hug as soon as the shock wore off. The boy left go soon after, backing away with a huge smile.

"I'll be the best student!" he said, grinning.

"I'm sure you will, but before I can to you as my student I must know your name."

"My name's Chase."

"Chase? That's a rather odd name."

"Well, I'm not sure that's really my name. My parents gave me this really long name that I couldn't even say, so they always just called me Chase, 'cause they always had to chase me around to do anything with me. Then, when they died, that's the only name I remembered, so that's the name I took."

"Ah, I see. Well, my name is Chang Wufei. I will be your sensei..."

"Wufei-sensei!"

"No, no. It's Chang-sensei."

"But I thought Chang was you first name? Isn't it rude to call a teacher by his first name?"

"Yes, but in China the surname, the last name, is given first, then the first name."

"Isn't that confusing?"

"Not for someone who's lived their all his life. It's only confusing because you've never done it that way before."

"I still like my name better, since I don't have to worry about last names and first names. I'm just Chase."

"But you will have to worry about it some day, when someone adopts you."

"Nah, no one wants to adopt anyone my age that can't work."

"And why can't you work? You look fine to me."

"I got hurt on the streets, see?" he said, pulling up his shirt to reveal a long, red scar low on his stomach, "Miss Sally says that I can't lift heavy things because of it or I'll hurt myself. That's why no one will take me," he said. He must have seen the somewhat depressed look on my face, because he quickly continued, "But that's okay, being here is better than being with a family anyway, there are lots of books here and I get to eat every day."

"Come," I said, quickly trying to distract the boy before I became emotional and hugged him or something, "You should read as much as you can today, because tomorrow you will have to read what I tell you."

The boy gave me a bright smile and scurried off.

Over the next few weeks I taught the boy all the subjects I thought he would need to know; history, math, science, and literature. I even spoke to Sally about giving Chase martial arts lessons, which she agreed to as long as I stayed away from moves that required a lot of lifting. Since lifting really wasn't a big part of the martial arts it was easy to agree and I began giving Chase martial arts lessons. I laid the schedule out so that he would have one class every day of the week, then Saturday for studying and homework and Sunday to play around. I was amazed at the speed at which Chase absorbed all this material. Though math was by far his worst subject he was not particularly slow at it. And where math was weak he made up for it in strength of history, mainly wars and battle strategies. On Sundays when he had free time we often played a battle strategy game. Though he was not quite experienced enough to win, I found myself hard pressed for the lead many times. Even Treize, who occasionally stopped in when his schedule allowed it, commented on how good my young student was.

Intrigued, I began to place more economic and tactical questions into the material I taught him. Chase breezed though the questions, always looking at all aspects of the situation and coming up with decisions that not even I had foreseen.

It wasn't long after I took up an interest in the boy that Treize gained one as well. Oh, I know well enough that Treize began giving attention to the boy only because of my interest in him, but from there Treize found many things that he liked about the boy and their relationship grew until Treize was giving him horseback riding lessons while I was at school with Master O. It seemed as though we were both growing attached to the boy. I would sometimes worry about him while when a harsh storm came up or there was trouble in the palace. Even Treize commented about things he would like and often bought books he thought Chase would like so that I could put them in the library for him, since giving him gifts would make the other children jealous.

Of course, Chase was blissfully unaware of who Treize and I really were. Other then our names, he knew nothing of us. Part of me wanted to tell him who I was, whilst another was afraid he would begin to act different. I believe that Treize feared the same thing, so we both silently agreed to stay quiet about our identities. It happened that one Saturday morning our deception was brought into daylight, though it was not resolved until later. It was while Chase and I were playing Chess, a game Chase was quite good at, while Treize watched.

"Chase," I cautioned as he moved one of his nights toward one of mine, "Be careful of your King. He's a powerful player, but you must protect him from attack," I said. Moving one of my players closer to his king to illustrate.

"I wonder if that's the way it is with the real king," Chase murmured as he dutifully moved a pawn to defend his King.

"What?" I asked, incredulously.

"You know, the real king. I wonder if he has to be protected all the time from attacks."

"I'm sure he has guards to protect him," Treize chimed in, a secretive little smile on his face, "but he would not be our king if he weren't capable of defending himself."

"I wonder if he has a beard," Chase said as he watched my move.

"What?" Treize snorted, trying not to laugh.

"A beard. I say a portrait of some guy on a white horse with wings and he looked like a king so I thought maybe our king had a beard."

"Where is the portrait?" I asked since Treize was to busy trying not to laugh to say anything.

"In the south hall, right by the orphanage."

"Ah, that painting. That's the earl of Kammis, he was executed for murdering any male in his family that was close enough to steal his title from him. Ironic that his only daughter of nine children, all others being boys who were immediately put to death, was the one that overthrew him, along with her mother and her aunt."

"Oh. So the king doesn't have a beard?"

"I don't believe so, no. Why does it matter?"

"I just always wanted to see the king. He's probably all puffed up like the other aristocrats I've seen. They all look like turkeys, running around with their chests puffed out and doing nothing all day. Still, I'd like to see the king and I'd really like to see his sorcerers! I've heard he's got a new one who's really young, like your age, and their both super powerful and mysterious. They wear capes and funny hates and pointed shoes and have brooms that move by themselves and..."

"Now where did you hear that!"

"It was in a book I read. "A Sorcerer's Tale," I think it was. Why?"

"Oh, no reason. Isn't it time for you to be at lunch?"

"Oh yeah! Bye!"

I sighed as the boy rushed out the door, then looked down at my slightly-blue lover.

"He's gone, you can laugh now."

And he did. And he did. And he did. He laughed until tears poured down his face and he was holding his sides in pain. Even I laughed for a bit, however it is not quite as funny to the one being told they wear funny hats and pointy shoes as the one listening.

"You know," Treize said once he had finally stopped laughing, "we aren't going to be able to keep this facade up for much longer. If he doesn't find out on his own someone's going to accidentally tell him."

"I know, I'm just not certain how he's going to react. It would be nice if we could spend some more time with him. He's healing fast, you know, pretty soon he'll be able to work the fields and someone will take him as a farm hand."

"That boy would be wasted as a laborer. He's a born strategist, a leader. It would be an atrocity to let him rot in the fields," Treize said, the went quiet, brooding almost. I could tell he was thinking of something.

"What is it, lover?" I asked, but he merely shook his head.

"Let me think on it for a while, I'll tell you a bit later, when my head is clearer. Now, I think we both have things to do, so we should go. Remember not to plan anything for tomorrow or the next day, Relena has agreed to up our links. Until tonight, my love," he said, the was gone.

My training with Master O that day was... intense. O discovered my affinity for fire and decided he needed to see the range of which I could set a blaze and the amount of blaze I could control. He ended up orbing us, a most ingenious technique that I was trying desperately to learn, to a stretch of barren desert, if that's what you would call it at those frigid temperatures.

Using magic dealing with fire was much different from anything I had done before. It... felt different. Instead of having that weird, moving energy feeling that I had before, it was more like releasing energy that had been bottled up. It surged out of me, never fighting or twisting as my other magic had, I needed only point in the direction I wanted it to go and it was happy to oblige. I allowed so much of the fire out that much of the ice surrounding the bare rock the we stood on melted and Master O feared we would cause a flood. Putting my power back into its bottle proved to be much more difficult than letting it out and Master O finally had to assist me by lending his own power, water based with much more experience, to help force mine back into its confines.

Master O let me go after that, it was late and he was tired from his work with me. I, on the other hand, was more energized than I had ever been. The remnants of my fire-magic surged through my veins, making me hot and impatient. I needed to do something, anything, or I felt that I would explode.

The first thing that came to mind was a duel with Treize. I was fairly certain that he'd be in our room at this time, so I hurried back and, as luck would have it, he was just getting out of the shower.

Which is when I found something much more interesting to do.


	42. Treize41

Treize POV

In the two weeks since Trowa had arrived, many things had happened. Beyond Wufei's new-found acquaintanceship with magic, his befriending of Chase, and my friendship with the boy, other things had happened. Trowa, having been accepted as a member of the Night Force, had helped to hunt down a particularly large and sly band of orphans and they had been taken into he orphanage. There it was revealed that they were all suffering form one malady or another, ranging from simple scratches to an intense flue virus. It took the nuns nearly four days to discover that the children were sick, and by that time they had all been checked over and integrated with the other children, contaminating them all.

I told myself it was my duty to go and check on the children, that I might be needed to help, but in truth I was worried about Chase, concerned that the older boy would be overlooked for treatment since he was stronger and more resilient than the younger ones. Putting myself in a position almost certain to get me sick when a war loomed was a stupid strategic move, but I ignored it.

Chase met me at the door to the orphanage. He looked tired, but he had this excited air about him that seemed to negate that fact.

"'Ello, Treize. What are you doing here?"

"I came to see how the children are doing, I heard some of them are sick."

"Yeah. Sally's givin' 'em medicine, but it isn't helping too much. Sally says that Master O might have to come and do magic on them."

"That's not good."

"Why not?"

"Magic is a fickle thing, Chase, what can heal one person can kill another. It's not very safe, using magic on people to heal, safer on children than adults, but still not safe. It would be best if Sally could heal them herself. Besides, I don't think I-... I don't think the king would want his sorcerer so tired right now. They say there is war on the horizon."

"Guess you're right. I guess I just wanted to see some magic. I saw a magician on the street once, doin' shows, but I looked at his stuff and it was all just tricks. I was disappointed."

"Well, fear not. These magicians have no tricks, only simple magic. I have no doubt that you'll meet one someday."

"Really? I hope so. Though it might have to be soon," Chase said, then gave me a bright smile, "Sally said I'm all healed and a pair of farmers were looking at me today. They said they have a young daughter but they could use some help around the farm. Isn't that great? I'd get to have a family again and a little sister and I bet they have a lot of cows and horses and..."

I tuned Chase out, my mind working furiously. That was definitely not the news I had wanted to hear and it solidified my urge to talk with Wufei. Regardless of wether or not he agreed with my idea, I would not see Chase as a farmhand. If I could not place Chase within the castle, I had several relatives that would be delighted to do me a favor and add the boy to their household. Either way, Chase would have a proper education.

"I'm glad may soon find a family," I interrupted, "but I need to see the others now."

"I don't know..." Chase said, not at all offended by my interruption, "You might get sick if you come in here."

"I have to see the other children. My employer would have it so," I half-truthed. In fact, since I was my own employer, it wasn't a complete lie, but it wasn't really honest either.

"Well, I guess if you have to you can come in, but you've gotta were a mask or you'll get sick for sure," Chase said, pulling out a handkerchief and handing it to me. I obediently tied it around my face.

"Why aren't you wearing one? You're not sick, are you?" I asked. Chase shuffled his feet a bit.

"Nah. I don't sick. Besides, a couple of people were thinking about taking me home and I didn't want to miss 'em, but they couldn't come in 'cause everyone's so sick," Chase said, his eyes downcast. I started, the thought that Chase might be adopted so soon had never occurred to me. I resolved to do something about it immediately, lest the boy waste away in the fields somewhere.

I made my rounds with the children, intending to only talk with the nuns and see what I could do to help, but I ended up doing errands and helping the stronger children care for the weaker. As I said, the orphanage was drastically undermanned for so many children and I resolved to do something about that. However, for the time being, there was no one else to help, so I lent my services. I often saw Chase helping the other children, revealing more admirable qualities about the child. The nuns never called me by my title, so I was able to observe Chase in his natural setting without worrying that my secret would be revealed.

Before I left I caught one of the nuns and told her explicitly that Chase was not to see anyone else about being adopted, that he was to be unadoptable for the time being. She seemed shocked, but would not refuse her king. Seeing her surprise, I assured her that Chase wasn't in trouble, I merely wanted to see him placed in a family where he could get a good education. I wasn't exactly sure where he would be placed, though, and that was the reason I gave for keep Chase unaware of everything. I also told her that Chase did not know who I was, and that I hoped to tell him when I informed him of where he would be living.

With all these loose ends tied up, I headed back to my room. It was late when I got there that night, but my dragon had still not returned so I opted for a quick shower. Wufei had said something about special training with O that day, I was knew he'd be tired, possibly in need of a back-rub and a shower, maybe tired enough to skip both. It was a bit disappointing in some ways, but comfortingly routine in others. Our relationship, which we had both agreed upon on the ride to Haven, had some what stagnated. At first Wufei had been too nervous and unused to his surrounding to be comfortable moving our relationship forward, but now we had settled into a kind of routine that, though I was content enough with for a time, I was growing tired of. Oh, I couldn't be happier with Wufei and our conversations and the time we spent together, but having the object of one's affection in bed with him every night and being unable to act upon any carnal urges one might have tends to make one... grouchy.

I realized that I would soon have to talk with Wufei about it, but I was afraid of scaring the boy off. Every time I thought of speaking to him about the subject I ended up giving himself to settle into a life that he'd obviously already grown accustomed to.

As I came out of the shower, I heard Wufei enter the room. Perfect timing, I thought, since we would just have time to get dinner and go to bed. He was probably tired, so I decided to leave talking to him for another day, as I had on several past occasions.

I left the bathroom in a towel, since all my clothes were in the other room. I assumed Wufei would be getting ready for a bath, so I filled the bath for him.

I noticed that there was something strange as soon as I arrived in the bedroom. It took me a second to pinpoint it; the fact that Wufei was still standing in the doorway. I paused, one hand securing my towel around my waist, the other hanging at my side.

"Wufei?" I called, "what's the matter?"

Wufei didn't answer. Instead, he seemed to come back to himself, as though his mind had been elsewhere. He moved, strangely uncoordinated, across the room.

"I'm fine," he told me, his voice with an odd note in it, "I just had a hard day of magical practice," he said, coming to stand before me.

"What would you like to do now?" I asked, but he remained silent. Slowly, his eyes drooped low and eventually he closed them, then leaned forward against me. His cheek came in contact with my bare chest and he sighed, rubbing it against my skin contentedly. Slowly, his hands came up and rested on my hips, slowly moving upward. When they touched my nipples, I jumped in surprise at the strange sensation.

"Wufei?" I question, bewildered at his behavior. He didn't hear me, though, because his hands were suddenly pulling me down desperately, and he stretched to kiss me.

It was not our first kiss. It was not our longest kiss. It might not have been our deepest kiss. But it felt like all of those and more. Wufei delved his tongue into my mouth, searching the moist cavern, exploring it. I fought him for control of our kiss, but it was merely play. I was happy enough that he would kiss me like that, I would not fight him for dominance tonight. Next time, however...

He suddenly backed away, leaving me annoyed and confused.

"I'm sorry," he muttered, shaking his head, "I didn't mean to do that," he told me and seemed genuinely sorry. I was a bit perturbed, having been left unsatisfied right in the middle of a very satisfying kiss.

"I'm not sure if you meant to do that or not," I told him, a bit harshly, "but I for one was enjoying it!"

"You... but... I..." he stuttered, unsure of himself.

"Wufei, what is going on?" I asked, beginning to worry.

"I think... I think my practice might have had some sort of... of side effect. I've been feeling like this ever since I did that spell."

"Oh," I muttered, disappointedly. Was it too much to ask that he be touching me because he wanted to? "Perhaps a shower will help," I suggested.

"Perhaps..." Wufei said offhandedly, but I could tell he wasn't paying any attention. Instead, he was running his finger up and down the side of my stomach, watching the muscles ripple as I tried not to flinch, revealing the secret that I was ticklish.

"Treize..." Wufei whispered.

"What is it, love?" I asked. As though he wasn't aware he had spoken out loud he looked at my face, surprised.

"Why won't you make love to me?" he asked. I was shocked.

"I didn't know you wanted me to. After everything that happened I wasn't certain that..."

"So you've been trying to protect me?" he asked and I could hear a not of indignant anger in his voice.

"No," I soothed, "I just thought you'd want to move slowly, I didn't want to rush you."

The anger faded out of my dragon's eyes and they went a bit sad, a bit shy, a bit frustrated, all at the same time. He looked down, but stepped closer to me.

"I'm not a child," he told me, "I'm not frightened because of what happened. I'm a man and I have the urges of one. I wanted you, but when you never made a move I wasn't sure... I know we talked about it, but we never said anything about..."

"You thought that I wasn't making a move because I had decided I didn't want you like that, didn't you, Dragon?" I said, smiling gently as I tilted his face toward me. "Nothing could be farther from the truth. You have no idea what it took for me not to rip the clothes off of you every time you entered this room, but you mean more than that to me and you deserve more than that, so I waited. Need I continue waiting?" I asked.

"No!" Wufei cried, lunging at me, pushing me back against the bed. We were suddenly in a frenzy. Hands were everywhere. My towel was gone. There was a ripping sound as I attempted to help Wufei rid himself of his clothing, but it was never found whether I, in my hast, tore Wufei's clothes or he, in his hurry to be dressed in only the sheets, tore his own clothes. It didn't matter. We fell back against the bed, our hands any where, everywhere, in a frenzy of passion.

It was almost fearfully that I pinned Wufei down, holding his arms down while I pushed my body up, away from his. I hovered over him, close enough to feel his heat but not close enough to touch. He was panting for breath, his eyes wide with lust and confusion.

Though my mind was clouded by passion, I could see the direction in which we were headed. I didn't want a quick, one-night stand. I didn't want to wonder what I had done when I woke up in the morning, Wufei nuzzled in my arms. I didn't want to rush things, and I certainly didn't want to let Wufei rush into this. I was, after all, his first lover. I wanted it to be good for him, I didn't wan to give him any reason to regret what we were about to do.

Slowly, I let myself back down onto Wufei, still keeping his arms pinned under me, letting him feel every inch of my skin that pressed to his. I rubbed my body up and down against his, causing the most delightfully tortuous friction. Wufei moaned low in his throat, the muscles in his stomach clenching and unclenching as he forced himself not to grab at me. Slowly, I kissed him, but I knew his attention was not on my mouth, but on other parts of my body. I placed my knee between his legs, pushing them apart, and gently caressed his groin with my leg. He moaned into my mouth and attempted to thrust himself toward me, begging to be touched, but I held him firm. He glared at me, but the look was so diluted by lust and passion that I could only laugh in response. I took his member in my hand and he forgot all about his anger in favor of this new sensation.

I toyed with him a bit, tormenting him by rubbing at his erection with just enough pressure to make him moan, but not enough to make him come. Torment for him was torment for me, though, because I found myself painfully aroused at the sight of him.

In the light of our current states, I knew our love making was not going to happen slowly, and possibly not at all if I didn't get it done before one of us came. Slowly, I rolled Wufei onto his belly, grabbing his hips as he began to hump the bed seeking release. Deciding that it was a bad idea to give Wufei so much temptation, I flipped him back over, holding him down with a knee on his stomach. Not that I had any doubt that he could easily throw me off if he really tried, simply that my knee reminded him not to do anything... fun without me.

It wasn't a conscious decision for me to put Wufei on bottom as much it was a conscious decision for him to be on bottom. It was simply a mixture of our sizes and experience. I was both larger and more experienced, making it easier for me to be on top, enabling me to teach Wufei what to do, and allowing me to keep a clearer head. Wufei was too overcome by his own lust to know anything outside his range of feelings.

There was lotion in the dresser next to the bed and I quickly pulled out a bottle. I had to pull my hands away from Wufei to spread it on my fingers and he gave an angry little groan. I quickly returned to my task, placing one hand on his erection while the other lifted his legs and pushed them apart, then delved between them in search of his entrance. The feeling was the same as the first time we had done this, but I knew the outcome would not be. As I stretched him, probably more than I needed to out of the sheer enjoyment of seeing him empaled by my finger and enraptured by it, I couldn't help but take note of his beauty once again and be awed by it. He was like some kind of god, come down to the mortal plain for a brief interlude with his human lover. I would have to make sure he never returned to Olympus.

I finally decided it was time for us to join when Wufei began panting, almost crying out in need. Gently, I removed my fingers from him and hoisted his legs over my shoulders. Slowly, I pushed myself into his molten heat, letting him adjust to my size as I warred with my instinctive need to thrust home. Soon, we were completely joined, and I began a slowly rocking motion that made Wufei scream in pleasure. His scream set me off and we were soon moving against each other in a frenzy of passion.

It ended too soon. Wufei came first, probably because of all the pleasurable torment I had put him through. His body tightened as he released himself, causing me to follow suit. A few more quick thrusts and I emptied myself into him, collapsing on top of him, sweat covered and exhausted. It took me a few moments to recover from my orgasm, and the post-orgasmic feeling kept me from wanting to move. None the less, I managed to make myself pull out of Wufei and fall beside him, having just enough energy to pull him into my arms. He curled against me, something he doesn't often allow himself to do, and I tucked his head under my chin. We fit perfectly together, and I could feel our heartbeats, both slightly raised by our previous excursion, beating in time with one another.

It was morning only a moment after I closed my eyes. I awakened slowly, bit by bit. When I finally woke completely, I was pleased to find Wufei still in my arms, though he was now facing away from me. I laid there for a long time, just watching him sleep.

Eventually, Wufei awoke, in the same slow manner I had. He glanced around when he finally woke, his eyes coming to rest on me, and he smiled. I pulled him close and we kissed passionately. When we parted, neither of us moved away, since we were both too comfortable in our current positions.

"How do you feel, Dragon?" I finally asked.

"Wonderful, but sore."

"You will get used to it, given time and practice."

"How often do you intend to do this with me?" Wufei asked with a bark of laughter. I smiled.

"As often as possible, my beauty. You make me hot for you."

"You'll have to be careful, lest I turn you into a stallion and send you out with the mares for a while to get rid of some of that heat."

"Is it too hot for you, dragon? But you would never send me out with the mares, you'd be too overcome by jealousy."

We were both laughing by this time and kissed again. We calmed soon and returned to that happy, fulfilled feeling of before. It was then that I felt the time was right to question Wufei.

"Dragon, what do you think of Chase?"

"He's a wonderful student, a good child, soon to be a strong man. Why do you ask?"

"I was thinking... someday soon I will need an heir and I-"

"I will not be second in your bed!" Wufei hissed. My jaw dropped, I was so startled.

"Wufei, I would never have anyone else in my bed. You are mine, forever. Heir or not , I will not use some woman simply to bear me a child, and I won't ask you to stay by while someone else lies with me. There is no one else for me but you."

"Then... why did you ask?"

"I have many relatives that would fight for my throne were I to die. Also, since I am not of the blood directly related to the original king, some of the royal bloodline may try to take back the throne. My life will be in danger in the upcoming war, not only from my enemies, but also from my family. Having an heir would solve many of these problems, simply by crushing any fighting before it can start. So, what I'm asking is..."

I paused, unable to continue. I was banking a lot on Wufei's response and I deeply hoped that he agreed. This was not something I simply wanted for my kingdom, or even for Wufei. A part of me wanted this strictly for myself.

"I'm asking if you'll consider allowing me to adopt Chase and name him my heir."

There was a long silence. It was hard not to hold my breath, but I forced myself to breathe evenly as Wufei was lying on my chest and would notice if I didn't. I was loathe to put any more pressure on him at the moment.

"Would you really be able to do that?" came the quiet question. "The boy has no lineage, no proper training, not even a real name. Would the people accept him as you heir?"

"I won't lie to you, Wufei, it won't be easy for Chase. He'll have to prove himself to the people as a good leader, but he's already shown that trait in himself. He's extemely intelligent, an excellent strategist, and he's already shown his capability to lead with his gang. He has knowledge of this country from his days on the streets that I was only able to gain through the use of Duo, and even then it was limited since Duo did not originate from this country. With a few years of training, he'll be able to hide his slight street-accent and know the proper etiquette. He'll soon be fully healed from his injury and his harsh upbringing will help him in the field..."

"I didn't ask for you to defend your decision," Wufei said, his quiet voice halting my words instantly. "I just want to know if you think he can do it, if you don't think it's too much for him."

"I don't, my love, or I never would have suggested it. He's strong and capable, he'll be an excellent leader."

"Then I accept him as your heir and will treat him as such."

"Wufei... I don't just want him to be my heir. You realize that, don't you? I want him... I want him to be our son."

"But you fail to understand, I have already accepted him as my son, and it seems that you have done the same. The rest is merely a formality we must get out of the way as soon as possible, the adoption and the crowning. He is our son already."

"But we must ask him. It would be shameful to force all this upon him."

"You really think he would reject us?"

"It is scary, becoming a king. Chase is no coward, but..."

"We will ask him. I doubt that he would be scared by any challenge, but it would not be just otherwise."

"It's also going to be a shock. Remember, he doesn't even know who we really are. Suppose he feels betrayed?"

"It's no use worrying about it now. Wait 'till morning, then you can fret yourself into an early grave if you like. Until then, kiss me and shut up, I intend to get some more sleep while I can."

"Have I tired you out, Dragon?"

"Humph! Bored me to death, more likely."

"Ah, I see that I will have to be more daring with you, my love. Perhaps making love outside, in plain sight, would be adventurous enough for you..."

"Enough! Quiet, you pervert, or you will sleep on the floor from now on!"

With a chuckle, I pulled Wufei close and fell back asleep.


	43. Chase42

Chase POV

They had to know I was sick. That was the only reason the nuns would stop letting me see people so that I could get adopted. I hadn't done anything exceptionally bad an my wound was all healed up, so that had to be the reason.

But I had been so careful not to show them that I was sick. I never coughed in front of them, I ate even when I wasn't hungry, I didn't sleep any more than usual, and I didn't let them touch me to feel how hot I was. They couldn't know, but then why would they keep me from getting adopted?

I wanted a family very badly. I liked it with Wufei and Treize and everyone else in the castle, but I wanted someone to protect me, someone who wouldn't leave me. When I was with my gang, I was always protecting them, I was always the one in charge. I could make sure they didn't leave me, that they were safe. Now, in the orphanage, I wasn't in charge anymore. Many of my gang members had already been adopted and I had this strange feeling, like they had all abandoned me.

Seeing Marge, a little girl from my gang, get adopted that afternoon was more than I could bear. The unfairness of having to watch all my friends get picked by families that could have, might have, picked me was just too much. I got away from the nuns and hid in a corner near the door to the city, a place where almost no one ever went without a reason. I ended up sitting in a corner, my knees drawn up and my head resting on them, crying like a child.

I hadn't cried in years and the sensation was new to me, almost scary. On the streets, someone who cried was considered weak and often picked on by other gangs. Absently, I fingered the pendant Wufei had given me before my last camping trip with Treize. There was a little dragon on it holding a red stone. It always made me feel better when I was sad, feel safer, somehow. Today, though, it just made me feel bad for being so greedy, seeing what I had been given and how I was still crying for more. I had a roof over my head, three meals a day, more books than I could ever read, and people that cared about me. I was greedy and selfish, and knowing that just made me cry harder because I still wanted to have my family and felt bad for wanting it.

I was so caught up in crying that I didn't hear the footsteps approaching the door until it was opened. I jumped up and wiped the tears away from my eyes, trying to hide what I had been doing.

Two people entered, a man and a woman, looking a bit nervous. I had never seen them around, so I decided they were probably lost.

"Hello," I called, clearing my throat and trying to loose the water sound to my voice.

"Oh!" the woman cried, startled, and turned and around to see me. The man also turned, but looked around once he saw me, like he was looking for someone else.

"Well now," the lady said, composing herself. She was really pretty, young looking, maybe twenty or so with a delicate quality around her. The man was also young, maybe older than 25. He also smiled at me once he saw that the person he was looking for wasn't around, though his eyes kept straying from me. "Where did you come from?" the lady asked.

"I live here," I told her, "My name's Chase and I live at the orphanage."

"Oh my," the woman said, turning to look at the man, "That's awful, don't you think Harry?"

"I sure do. But he looks like a bright lad, he's probably more interested in school than family life, isn't that right."

I shook my head.

"No, I just haven't been adopted yet. I'd like to, but..."

"I understand honey," the lady said, her voice sympathetic. "Actually, Harry and I were just heading to the orphanage. We were looking for a boy about your age. You see, I can't have any children and, well, we were hoping for a son to help with the work on the farm, you know, taking care of the horses and plowing the fields. It's not hard work, just a bit heavy for me to help with. We're very excited about getting a child, though, I must say, the trip down here was rather long. Do you know a place were we could get something to eat?"

"The cafeteria's right down that way, but if you're really hungry the kitchen's over there. The cook's really nice, but you have to watch out for her helpers. They aren't mean or anything, they just yell a lot."

"Well, aren't you just a well of information," the lady said, giving another look to her husband. "I wonder, how long have you been here? A smart boy like yourself must know all about this castle. I'm sure you've done lots of exploring, a brave boy like yourself, haven't you?"

"I guess you could say I'm a bit of an expert on the castle," I bragged, "With all the extra time I have, being an orphan and all, I've seen just about everything in the castle. I know all its secrets, and I never forget," I lied. To tell the truth, I hadn't had a whole lot of time since Wufei had started teaching me. Between his lessons, his homework, my chores, my lessons with Treize, and the extra places Treize and Wufei took me, I hadn't had much time for exploring at all. The farthest I had gone was to see where Treize and Wufei's room was. Of course, the fact that they were together wasn't new to me; I hadn't survived on the streets by being blind. I wasn't bothered by it, since they were both so nice and they seemed to love each other so much.

"Well!" the lady exclaimed, startling me out of my thoughts, "Aren't you a bright little boy. What do you think, Harry, isn't he perfect?" she gushed.

"I think so," Harry said.

"You mean it? You really mean it?" I asked, surprised and overjoyed.

"Of course I do! Chase, I'm going to be your new mother!"

I jumped up and down for joy, then caught myself and stopped, embarrassed. I would finally have a family, and with two very nice people. I was so happy. I hugged the lady, my new mother, and she hugged me back, if a but awkwardly. I dismissed it, she'd get better in time.

"Come on!" I shouted, "We just have to get the papers from the orphanage..."

"Whoa, tiger!" the man interrupted, "Hang on there! Don't you-uh... Don't you want to know more about us?"

"Oh yes," the lady jumped in, "Why don't you and I talk while Harry goes down and fills out all that dreary paper work, hmm? How does that sound?"

"Okay," I agreed. I was so happy, I would have agreed to just about anything.

"My name's Roberta," the lady said as the man went down the hall. "I'm sure you know that the man you just saw was my husband, Harry. We live in a small farm house outside of the city. We have two horses and some chickens and some hunting dogs..."

"I know how to ride horses," I said excitedly, "My friend Treize taught me."

"Oh really?" Roberta replied, "Well, that's nice. Anyway, I'm sure you'll love it with us."

"All done," Harry said, coming back around the corner in an oddly short amount of time. "You officially ours, kid. Now, we'd better get going if we don't want to miss the coach."

"I'll just go get my stuff," I said, but Roberta stopped me.

"I'm afraid you won't have time, darling. We've rented a coach, but it leaves very soon. If we don't hurry, we'll miss it and be stranded here. Don't worry, we'll buy you new things."

"But..." I protested. I had really wanted to say good-bye to everyone. I couldn't imagine leaving without saying good-bye to Wufei and Treize and the other children.

"Unless you've decided you don't want to go..." the man said.

"No!" I protested, seeing my one chance for family slipping away.

"Alright then," Roberta said happily, "Let's get going."

The two adults, my new parents turn and head for the door. I move behind them, a little reluctantly, but obediently follow, like any good son. They led me out into the city, passed all my old stomping grounds and away from everything I knew. After a while we did catch a coach, but the driver didn't seem overly concerned with us and it didn't seem like it had been waiting.

My parents were oddly silent now that we were out of the castle. Neither of them smiled or talked to me, as I had thought they would. As we road in silence, I started to get the bad feeling in the pit of my stomach, the one I got every time I made a big mistake.

We road out of the city and to a deserted little stretch of land shrouded in forests. Somewhere along the way it had started to rain and, though the weather was beginning to get warmer, it was still cold. We arrived a little while after dark at a small shack, not in good enough shape to be called a house. It seemed to be the remnants of a farm, since there was a small, half fallen in barn and a fence that surrounded two old, sick horses that seemed to be about two inches short of dead.

It was then that I realized I was in serious trouble. I didn't survive for all those years on the streets by being stupid, though my I was starting to doubt how smart I really was. For one thing, the fields hadn't been plowed in years. For another, no one could possibly live in a house like that for more than a week and, considering that I had been forced to live in some of the shabbiest places on earth, that wasn't just being picky. And of course there was the fact that none of the nuns would have let one of us children go to a family that lived in a house like this, they were almost suspicious about who they allowed to adopt.

All the bad little feelings, all the odd looks and strange reaction finally came together, though they still didn't make any sense. What did they want me for? Why the big deal? What was going on?

I was in a sort of daze as we got out of the wagon and the adults, definitely not my parents, ushered ne into the house. The inside was as I expected it, one room, wood floors, the walls with some small holes in them, the ceiling starting to come down, and a wood burner in the back keeping it moderately warm. There was a table in the center of the room with maps strewn about it, three me were seated at the table looking at the maps. On the floor was four gray dogs that looked more like wolves than anything. They growled at me as I entered and I stopped, but Harry pushed me forward.

"Anybody notice you?" one of the men at the table asked.

"Nobody knew a thing," Harry replied, smiling.

"Good. Think this kid can tell us what we need to know?"

"If anybody can, he can. Here, kid, sit down," Harry told me, pulling out a chair. I sat, more because I knew I didn't have a choice than anything.

"Alright, kid," the man said, standing from the table. He was older, probably 50 or so, with a deep scar on his cheek. "All we need to know is where the king's room is in the castle. Once you tell us that you can keep going with your... parents... to their pretty little house and live happily ever after."

Yeah, like I was going to believe that. First off, I was pretty sure that no parents actually interested in having a kid would interrogate him before they even got him home. Second, they would probably want to kill me once I gave them the information to keep me quiet about their kidnaping and/or murder of the king. And lastly, I had no idea where the king slept. The farthest I'd gotten in the bedrooms was Treize and Wufei's room. I wasn't sure what title either of them held, but I was pretty sure that the king didn't sleep anywhere near either of them.

"I don't know," I told him simply. I knew he wouldn't believe me, but he wasn't about to believe anything short of an answer and I didn't want to let these guys get into the castle and just start killing whoever they wanted to.

"Look, this will go a lot easier for you if you just tell us what we want to know. You're a smart kid, you know what could happen to you if you don't."

"I really don't know," I told him. He hit me across the face, causing my lip to start bleeding and my head to spin. I really hadn't expecting them to start getting physical so soon, I guessed they were pretty serious.

It went on like that for what seemed like hours. They took turns, sometimes asking, sometimes ordering, begging, threatening, lecturing, or hitting. In the end I just stopped paying attention. If they hadn't been hitting me every so often, I probably would have fallen asleep. I was feeling weak again and I knew my fever was back up, but there was nothing I could do about it. I wasn't really worried about it, though, when you're not sure you'll see the sunrise a little cold doesn't seem so bad.

Of course, I was sure that I wouldn't live out the week. If I didn't break and give them some phoney answer they'd most likely give up and kill me, either way I was dead. I didn't have any illusions about a rescue party, since I hadn't fought when they'd taken me away nor had anyone seen us go.

They gave up very late that night. I had no certain way of telling, but I thought it was about midnight.

"Lock 'im up in the barn, Harry, see if a night in the cold 'll make him remember."

Harry dragged me outside, into the rain, and over the to the old barn. Half of it had fallen down, but there was still a small part that was fully enclosed. Harry jerked the door open and pushed me inside, tying my hands together and then to a beam so I couldn't get away. Not that I had anywhere to go if I did get away.

The roof leaked in the old barn, which didn't surprise me in the least, but I hadn't expected the wind to blow through the holes in the walls and chill my already wet body. I curled up as best I could in the corner, but I was still shaking no matter what I did. The cords that bound my hands were too tight and I couldn't feel my fingers or most of my hands, though I could feel the cords biting into my wrists well enough.

I think I might have wished for death just to take away the cold. I couldn't find that reason to stay alive that I had used all the other times I was close to death. My gang was gone, dispersed to loving families and parents, and I would actually better protect everyone by dying than I would by living.

My mind floated to happier times as I lay there, somehow trying to bask in the warmth of my memories and get warmer. I thought of my parents, what little I could remember of them, and of fun times with my gang. Strangely, I found myself thinking a lot about Treize and Wufei, and our good times together. Vacations to the forest, fishing, games of chess, and poetry in the orchard. These memories comforted me, and I believe I fell asleep.

I awoke to the pounding of hooves. Light was just peeking through the cracks in the barn, so I assumed it was about dawn. The hooves neared the house and I heard the door open in the distance and Harry shouted, "What the hell!" There was frantic movement in the house and I heard people come streaming out, the pounding of their feet audible even though I could not see what was happening. There were yells and shouts and someone must have let the dogs loose because they began to bark. There was a scream of rage, made by a woman, a battle cry and one of the men grunted painfully, then there was the sound of something heavy hitting the ground. There was a sound like an explosion and one of the dogs began to yip in pain. Someone screamed, "Sorcerer!" and another shouted, "It's the king! Kill him!"

There were sounds of a brutal battle that slowly quieted.

"Where's the boy!" I heard someone growl in a voice that sounded familiar.

"Where is he?" someone else yelled and I recognized Treize's voice! And the other was Wufei! I couldn't believe they'd come for me.

"I-I know where he is," I heard Harry stutter. There was a sound of a sword being drawn and Treize said menacingly, "If you try anything I'll..."

"Be careful, you majesty," I heard the lady, Une, say as I could hear three people move toward me. The door shook and Harry jerked it open, then rushed in a lifted me before I could even see who was with him. Harry pulled me up and laid a knife on my throat, backing up as far as the rope I was tied with would let him.

"One wrong move and it's his life," he threatened. Wufei and Treize froze.

I was able to see my two rescuers clothing well in the light. Wufei didn't look all that different from usual, save that he was wearing a light armor and a cape. Treize, however, was decked out in jewel-encrusted armor with a long red cape and an expensive sword. It was odd, he looked like a king, but he was just a... just a... just a... not a king, anyway.

"Release him and I will spare your life," Treize commanded, looking like he would like to see the man roasted on a spit. Wufei didn't say anything, but muttered under his breath and glared at the man.

"Ha! I don't think so," Harry laughed. "Lay down your sword and call off your troops and I'll..."

"Freeze!" Wufei yelled. Harry jerked and I closed my eyes, feeling the blade cut my throat.

Oddly enough, though, the blade stopped just as Wufei finished telling Harry to freeze. I opened my eyes to see Harry completely frozen in place, as if by magic. But that couldn't be, Wufei was a... was a... was a... not a sorcerer. He just couldn't be.

Someone grabbed me and I jumped, but I saw that it was only Treize. He pulled Harry's knife away from me then pulled me out of his grasp and cut the rope that bound me to the beam. Quickly kneeling beside me, he lifted my chin and examined the wound.

"Is he alright?" Wufei asked.

"That bastard got him, but it's only a flesh wound. It won't even need stitches. Still, if you hadn't stopped him in time..."

I had never seen Wufei so mad before. True, Treize was madder than I had ever seen him before too, but Wufei was so mad his eyes were nearly glowing. In fact, they really did seem to be glowing. Wufei turned slowly toward the still-paralyzed Harry.

"He who would harm a child like this has no honor, and will die in a way fitting," Wufei said, his words harsh and clipped. He made a short little gesture with his hands and a fire began around Harry's feet, slowly moving upward until he was completely encased in flames.

Wufei was a sorcerer. Which would make Treize a king. I knew it was true, but I couldn't seem to accept it. It was too much, too fast.

I was suddenly crying, though I wasn't sure why or when I had started. There were tears on my face for no reason, streaming down my cheeks as I tried to hide it with my hand.

"Chase?" Treize asked, "What's wrong?" he questioned, pulling my hand away from my face. I just shook my head. My emotions were too scrambled, too mixed up, for me to even know, let alone tell them. I sniffled, then sneezed. Wufei instantly put his hand on my forehead.

"He's burning up!" he whispered to Treize.

"Do you think it's the flu?"

"Chase," he said quietly, putting his hands on the sides of my face and turning me to look directly at him, "Were you sick before you left the orphanage or did it just start now?"

"I-I was s-sick before," I told him.

"Damn it! And you're soaked, too."

They both went into action at the same time, Treize took off his cape and Wufei began pulling off my wet clothes. I tried to help, but I was shivering too much to get a good grip on the shirt and Wufei just batted my hands away. I stood there shivering as Treize wrapped me in his cape. Treize lifted me off the ground and I once again was reminded of just how strong he really was.

"Can you orb him back to the castle?" Treize asked, holding me close and letting me soak up his body heat. Wufei bit his lip.

"I better not. This battle took a lot out of me. If I orb the both of us back to the castle I may not have enough power left to heal him and with Master O so tired from healing the rest of the children..."

"Then let's go!" Treize shouted, more to the rest of the riders than at Wufei.

"We'll handle things here," lady Une called, "You get him back to the castle. Are you going to fly?"

"I can't. He's cold and wet already; I don't want to risk hypothermia and we don't have anything heavy enough to keep him warm.

"Get going then, we'll bring the prisoners to the castle for interrogation. What of the man that went with you?"

"He's been... dealt with," Wufei told her as he took me from Treize. Treize mounted his horse easily and Wufei then handed me up to him, giving Treize his cape to tie around me, securing me to Treize for the ride, since I was too weak to hold on. Then Wufei mounted his own horse and we set off at a speed that I hadn't thought possible for normal horses.

"You're going to be fine," Treize said, one arm wrapped around me, the other holding the reins as he urged the horse to go faster. "Everything will be alright," he said as he gently rubbed my back. I tried to smile and would have told him I was fine, but I was shivering too badly to talk. The heat from the horse and from Treize was starting to help, but it wasn't enough.

I must have fainted, because my next memories were of being in the castle. I could remember Treize rushing me down the halls, then I could remember seeing the door to his room, but nothing in between. I could remember Sally's voice, but when I looked around she was gone. Someone put a thermometer in my mouth, then gave me a drink, but I couldn't remember the thermometer being removed or asking for a drink. I remembered shivering, then sweating, getting warm then getting cold, but I couldn't remember what order those things happened in. Finally, Treize picked me up and put me in his lap and Wufei stood in front of me. Wufei whispered something and put his hand on my bare chest. There was a bright light and I felt a strong warmth in my chest, then the pain left me. I looked around and remembered clearly seeing Wufei standing in front of me, looking exhausted, and Treize sitting behind me, looking tired and worried. Then the darkness claimed me and I fell asleep.

I awoke much later, feeling warm and better than I had in weeks. There was a warm body pressed against my back and I was pressed against someone's chest. I opened my eyes and blinked sleepily. I looked around to find Treize in front of me and Wufei behind, sleeping peacefully.

"So you're up," I heard Treize whisper.

"What happened?"

"You're night outdoors complicated your sickness. You almost died, but Wufei managed to find a spell strong enough to heal you."

"Oh. Is... is he alright?"

"He's fine. He just needs to rest up a bit. Let him sleep for a while..."

"I'm awake," Wufei muttered, opening his eyes.

"Sorry if we woke you," I apologized. Wufei ignored my comment and pushed himself up on his elbow, reaching out to check my temperature before falling back to the bed.

"You have quite a bit of explaining to do," Wufei said. I nodded.

"I'm sorry for all the trouble I caused," I told them. Wufei snorted.

"You should be. You just about worried Treize into a coma and gave us both matching ulcers.

"O-oh. I'm sorry..."

"We know you're sorry and we forgive you. What we want to know is what happened," Treize said, smiling slightly. "We aren't mad at you."

"I-... What do you want to know?"

"When did the two take you? Where did they come in at? Why didn't you try to get someone's attention?"

"T-they came in at the back entrance, the one that Duo and Heero brought me in. I was sitting there and they started talking to me. They... they said they wanted to adopt me and I..."

"You trusted them," Treize finished for me. "Why wouldn't you talk to us, at least to say goodbye?"

"I-... They said they had permission to adopt me. They said they talked to the nuns and they had to leave and they'd buy me new things and I... I... I really wanted to have a family, so... And after the nuns wouldn't let me see any other families I thought this was my last chance so I... I..."

Treize wiped a tear away from my cheek and I was horrified to see that I was crying. I tried to cover it up, but he stopped me.

"The nuns wouldn't let you meet any more families because you already have one."

"What?"

"You have us. I asked the nuns not to let anyone see you because Wufei and I wanted to ask you about letting us adopt you."

"Why... why didn't you tell me?"

"We wanted to talk to you about... who we are. You probably know by now that Wufei is a sorcerer and I'm..."

"...the king," I finished for him.

"How long have you known?"

"Just today. Everything came together and it made me wonder why I hadn't seen it before."

"So you realize, then, what it means for me to adopt you, right?"

"...No. What does it mean?"

"You'll be a prince."

"...What?"

"The son if a king, generally, is a prince."

"But... don't we need to be blood-related?"

"I'm the king, I can do what I want. Besides, Wufei's been having some problems getting pregnant. The odds of us having a child together are very low," he told me with a teasing smile. I knew enough about anatomy to know that two males couldn't have a child together. At least, not by normal means, anyway.

"So... you want me? To be a king?"

"Well, not right away, but eventually. It won't be your stereo-typical family and I can't promise you an easy life, but we do both love you very much and we want you to stay with us."

"I think the real question that my tactile lover has been avoiding is will you accept us as your parents and accept the responsibility of being prince of Russia?" asked Wufei.

"Of course," I answered without hesitation. This was my family, the adoption was just a finalization.

"Good," said my mentor and new father, "then let's get some sleep. I haven't gotten a wink of sleep in two days looking for you, I'm exhausted."

"How did you find me?" I asked, curious.

"Actually, I wouldn't have found you had you not been wearing that necklace," Wufei said, blushing slightly. I looked down at the pendant, but couldn't find anything special about it. "You remember when I gave it to you, right before that big camping trip with you and Treize? Well, I was a bit worried you'd get lost on that trip, so I cast a spell on the pendant to show me where you were at all times..."

"What did you think I was going to do, dragon, drop him into a river?" Treize asked teasingly.

"No, I just wasn't sure you'd be able to chase after a boy his age, being that you're getting up there in years and all," Wufei teased back. "But the point is that when the nuns found you missing I just evoked that spell on the map to see where you were. When I saw you not only out of the castle but out of the city limits I knew something was wrong."

"Which was when I rallied the troops and we road to save you. We would have been there sooner, but the nuns had been searching the palace for you and neither of us heard you were missing until morning. We didn't notice you were missing because we were having our links upped, so we thought you were with the nuns and had no idea that anything was wrong," Treize told me.

"You know that once we realized you were gone nothing could have stopped us from coming to get you, right? We won't let anything happen to you, no matter what," Wufei finished.

"Yeah," I said quietly, trying to hold back the tears in my eyes, "I know... dad."


	44. God43

God POV

The sun was high over the horizon when Treize and Wufei first unveiled there plans to adopt Chase to their supportive friends. Chase, shy because of his soon-to-be title of prince, sat somberly, awaiting some kind of refusal. A refusal that was far from everyone's mind as they happily congratulated the new fathers and welcomed Chase into the group.

"I'm a bit relieved," commented Une, "this will hopefully support your family-man look now that your sexual preferences have been revealed to the troops."

"How have they taken it? I know my linking with Wufei isn't truly a wedding, but I also know that most of them thought that you and I would eventually... But never mind. I just need to know if they've lost all respect in me."

"Quite the contrary," Sally giggled, "They still see you as a great leader, they just see Une here as a little more... on their level."

"What do you mean?" asked Treize. Une sighed.

"Well, it seems that, now that you've taken Wufei as your partner, word got out of my relationship with Sally." Une sighed in disgust. "Since I have the same sexual preference for women that a majority of my troops have, they now feel as though they can come to me any time they like with their relationship problems and I'll be able to fix them because I am a woman and I like women."

Sally broke out in a fit of laughter. "Duo suggested we should let Une have her own "Love Help Line." We could give her an office and everything, but Une didn't think it was funny..."

"It was not not funny enough to throw me into the pond, Une-chan!" Duo yelled from the other side of the table.

"No," Heero put in, "But you must admit, that was very funny."

"And I believe you left the fish with quite an impression, losing you pants and all," Trowa commented, his quiet humor showing through as he slowly relaxed around his new family. And, of course, his lover beside him helped to make sure everything was going smoothly.

"On a more serious note, Une, have you managed to find whoever it was that leaked the information to those traitors?" Treize asked.

"As a matter of fact, I have," Une said, a slight note of pride in her voice. "Once my soldiers found out what had happened, they quickly investigated and found one of the merchants that frequents here to be the culprit. He's being executed along with the other traitors as we speak."

"I wonder if he actually knew what he was doing, or if it wasn't just an accident..." said Quatre, a bit of sadness in his eyes. Trowa wrapped an arm around him, he knew how much executions bothered his lover.

"Oh, he knew alright. He's was bragging about it in a bar when my soldiers found him. That's how they found him, actually, prideful bastard."

"I'm glad that's settled. In that case, I'd like to schedule a coronation for Chase next month."

"Isn't that a little early?" Relena asked. Though he lover had already left, it spoke volumes of her progress that she felt comfortable enough to give friendly advice without her supportive and protective lover around. "I mean, you have to invite as many royals as you possibly can, lest one of them feels miffed and supports a faction that tries to overthrow Chase. It's a precarious position he'll be in when he takes the crown, the more support he has, the better of he'll be."

"I suppose you're right," Treize sighed, "I'd just like to get this over as soon as possible. Remember, there's still the possibility of war on the horizon."

The table grew quiet, brooding, all thinking of what might happen if a war did begin. Chase had to stop himself from thinking too hard or he knew he'd start crying, thinking he might lose his new family.

"Well," Master O said after a long silence, "I think that's enough brooding for one day. I think I'll go get some rest."

Wufei frowned, thinking it odd that his teacher had begun taking so many naps all of a sudden. Wufei tried to shrug it off, but he was a bit worried. Ever since O had finally taught him the spell that he used to keep the volcanoes under Haven dormant he had been unusually tired.

Concerned, Wufei sent a feeling of worry over his link to Treize. Treize immediately responded with a feeling a reassurance, trying to tell him not to worry, and reenforced it by giving Wufei a small smile.

"Chase," Sally said looking at the clock, "Don't you have a fencing lesson right now?"

"Crap!" Chase said, standing so quickly that his chair fell over, "Dorothy's going to kill me!" Chase said as he rushed out of the room and bolted down the hall like he was on fire. The rest of the table shared a little laugh, but slowly began to disperse.

"I'd better make sure he's alright," commented Relena with a small smile, "Dorothy's a bit too serious about Chase learning to fence. I just hope she doesn't turn him into a pin cushion."

"I'll go with you," said Treize, rising with her, "I've been meaning to watch Chase fence and see how he's doing."

"Id better get going too," Duo said, "Howard's got a box of puppies I've been dying to see. You comin', Heero?"

"If it's all the same to you, I've been meaning to speak with Wufei."

"Alright then, I'll see you later."

"Duo."

"Yes, love?"

"We are not getting a puppy."

"But-but-but..."

"Get a goldfish," Wufei suggested, "If he can take care of that you could think about graduating him to a puppy."

"We had a goldfish," Heero answered.

"That wasn't my fault Heero!" Duo defended. "How was I supposed to know that fish eat until they explode? He looked hungry!"

"You exploded your goldfish?" Wufei asked slowly, trying not to let his mind give him a picture of the scene.

"As I said," Heero told Duo, a stern glint in his eyes, "No puppies."

"...No puppies," Duo conceded reluctantly. "Guess that just means I'll have to spoil them at Howard's See ya!"

Duo headed off and Heero turned to Wufei, who was looking slightly confused but not showing any emotions to discourage Heero.

"Wufei? If' you have some spare time I'd like to speak with you."

"Of course. Why don't we go down to the gardens, it's quiet there."

Heero and Wufei both rose to leave, eventually followed by Quatre, who was scheduled to meet with a baron, now stripped of his title, who had grievances with the king, and Trowa, who was there to act as body guard. Sally and Une both had duties to get back to, but both wanted to enjoy some time together so were the last ones to leave the table.

In the garden, Heero and Wufei stopped at a small pond of koi, one of Wufei's favorite spots. Heero glanced around nervously, he wasn't sure how to ask Wufei his question. Wufei seemed to notice his anxiety and took pity on him.

"Was there something you wanted?" he questioned politely. Heero nodded, then paused.

"I was wondering... When Duo rescued me from Wing, he killed the lord that was in charge of it. He was told... he was told that I was to be a demon, but the lord there wanted me to look like a human, so he did something that would keep me from growing wings or a tail. I was wondering... if you could fix it."

There was silence for a minute as Wufei thought of what Heero had said.

"It depends," he answered slowly, "if whatever was done to you was done by magic or science. Magic I can deal with, but science might be a bit more difficult since I don't know exactly what was done. Do you know which was used?"

"Lord J was known for mixing science and magic, so it could be either, or a combination of both."

"The I suppose I won't know until I see what he did. Take off your shirt and turn around," Wufei instructed. Heero gave him a confused little look, but trusted Wufei enough to obey. There weren't any marks on Heero's back to indicate a spell, but there weren't any scars to indicate science either. Hoping to feel what had been done to Heero, Wufei laid both his hands on Heero's back. Instantly Wufei gasped and pulled back, as though burned. Heero turned around and looked at Wufei with puzzlement and concern.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Whoever put that spell on you was very powerful and very much alive."

"But that's impossible. Duo killed Lord J himself."

"Did it ever occur to the two of you," another voice chimed in, "that Lord J might not have done the spells on Heero?" asked Master O, coming out of the bushes.

"I thought you were taking a nap," said Wufei.

"I was. This is one of my favorite napping spots; it's quiet here, peaceful. When I heard the two of you speaking I thought I'd come over and ask you to keep it down a bit. I'm glad I did. Heero, why did you never mention this malady before?"

"I didn't think about it much. I had never thought of being anything but what I am, so it didn't seem all that important. Still, I want to be able to fly and..."

"And you felt more comfortable asking Wufei for help then me," O finished for him. Heero lowered his eyes, blushing. "I don't blame you, from what Duo's told me you had quiet a bit thrown at you all at once. Still, though my powers may be waning in my old age, I do have a little more experience that Wufei. Let me have a look."

Slowly, realizing that Heero was a little jumpy after having him appear out of nowhere like that, Master O laid his hands on Heero's back.

"Yep, the man that did this was definitely alive and definitely not J. Until we track down the wizard who did this or find the spell that he put on you, you're stuck this way. So, Wufei, it's your new assignment to find which spell this is. Here, get a feel for it, because I don't think Heero's going to want to come to the tower everyday to let you feel his back. So, what' the base element of the spell?"

"Ice."

"Good. And the degree?"

"High."

"What about the secondary element?"

"...Sunlight."

"Wrong. It's fire."

"But that's impossible."

"No, just extremely difficult. Because ice isn't water in its truest form a fire element will mix with it, but it takes an extremely powerful wizard to do it, though the spell will never wear off or break if fire and ice are the main elements. The only way to stop it is to..."

"Kill the caster thus shutting off the energy supply to the spell, allowing it to dissipate."

"Very good."

"But fire and ice are prime elements, so what makes the characteristics of the spell?"

"Because the main elements are both prime, as many sub-elements as needed can be added. This makes the characteristics of the spell."

"Umm... excuse me. If I'm not needed anymore could you both remove your hands from my back so I can leave?"

"Oh, of course. And put your shirt on," Master O called as Heero started to walk away, "before you catch a chill!"

The castle slept that night feeling a little abnormal, still worried about war, but in a detached sort of way. The guards on duty chatted amongst themselves about the relationship between their captain and the doctor, usually happily, but always to relieve the nervous tension building inside them. There were very few that felt odd about the two's relationship, and those that did made sure not to voice their opinions around those that didn't. Either way, all had such a high respect for their commander that her personally life didn't have much affect on their opinion.

Through the rest of the castle, those that slept did it uneasily, and those that could not sleep found themselves fidgeting for no apparent reason. Down in the stables, the horses stomped restlessly. Even the small owl Master O kept caged high in his observatory fidgeted more restlessly than usually.

"It's almost time," said Master O, removing the owl and carrying it to the window, where he let it fly into the night, knowing it would return by morning. "Almost time," he repeated, wishfulness and sadness mixing in his voice. "I wish I had enough time to make just one trip home. I'll write them a letter, though, that will be enough. Still, I wish... Hmm," he sighed, "if wishes were stars they'd be brighter than the sun."

It wasn't long after that when the first troops were seen on the horizon. The shout went up and the commander woke, sitting straight up in bed, startling her lover, who had been sleeping soundly. Sally heard the call and felt her heart drop, as it did every time Une went to war. All Sally could do was to wait for her love to return to her, battered and bruised, in need of help for her body and her heart. All she could do was to wait and hope that her love came back to her at all and to pray that she did not see Une carried in under a blanket.

"Get to the medical wing," Une warned, jumping out of bed, "and don't leave until I come for you!" she said as she rushed out the door, casting one last worried glance at her lover, knowing how much worry the battles caused Sally and worrying a bit for her lover too. Sally had a tendency to be over-zealous about her job. Many a time Une found her on the fringes of the battles, helping wounded that had not been reached by the other medics. It made her stomach clench in fear, to see Sally on a battlefield without even a weapon to protect herself. Une never let on, but she worried just as much for Sally during a battle as her lover did for her.

In the other room, Treize and Wufei both lurched in each other's arms, untangling from each other and sitting up in one fluid motion, both ready to fight. They stood and dressed with a tense grace, both throwing articles of clothing at the other to speed the process along. Both knew well the other's skills, and trusted him not to get hurt. The worry would not fade completely, but the instinctive trust helped. They rushed to get their clothing on, knowing that precious moments would have to be spared getting Chase to a safe place. That would be Wufei's job. Though Wufei was a bit miffed about not being able to join in the real battle, he realized that he was most needed in the tower, which also happened to be one of the safest places in the palace due to Master O's magic. Wufei wasn't too upset, though, because it would be his first time using magic in a real battle situation.

In Relena's room, Dorothy woke quickly and pulled away from her sleeping lover. Quietly sliding across the room, she opened the door just a sliver and peered out, looking for immediate danger. When she saw none, she gently shook Relena awake and told her to dress. Unlike the others in that hall, her battle had already started. Until Relena was safe, Dorothy would bypass the battle, only to return when Relena was safe in her position or with a guard of skill.

In Duo's room, Heero sat up immediately upon hearing the shout, coming instantly awake. Duo jumped, groaned, fell out of bed, and became tangled in the sheets. Heero smiled tenderly at his dazed lover before pulling on the sheet and rolling him out of the snare. Now was not the time for fun and games. Duo sat up and gained his bearings.

"Castle's under attack, eh?" he said, his face conveying the seriousness his face did not, "Guess we better get goin'. Hey... I... I don't wanna lose you," he said slowly, as though he had been prepared for this for a very long time. "I know I wouldn't stay out of the battle, so I won't even ask you... but... don't leave me, alright? I don't wanna lose you now that we finally..."

Heero shut him up with a kiss. When the parted, Heero looked directly into Duo's eyes.

"I know the risks of the battle, and I thank you for your trust. I will not let you down. I will not lose you now," Heero said, his message clear to Duo, though it remained unsaid.

What Duo could hear in the message, through Heero's eyes more than his voice, was: "I love you. I trust you. I won't leave you. Don't leave me."

For a moment, the two embraced and held each other in tight grips, as though they would be torn apart by the winds of fate, then they parted and dressed for battle.

In Quatre's room, Trowa was already out of bed and dressing before his blonde lover even fully awoke. Never one for words, Trowa deliberately tossed Quatre's clothes onto the blonde's head, waking him up quickly and forcing him to dress. Trowa donned his outfit, magically enhanced by Wufei so that it would not hinder him if he transformed into a wolf. It was a stunning armor that neither itched or cut into his skin, as it had when he had tried it on with the mercenaries. And the spell Wufei cast made it shift like water when he transformed so that it wold still protect him when he became a wolf.

But his new outfit was far from Trowa's mind at that time. Trowa was worried for Quatre, who always had a hard time when someone was in pain around him. Trowa feared the pain would over take him, even though he knew Quatre was a strong, capable fighter, and his blonde love would make some fatal mistake. The thought of losing Quatre preyed on his heart like nothing ever had before. Quatre was his love, his closest friend, and, since they had upped their links just recently, a part of his soul.

It was hard, sometimes, to be in love with Quatre. Trowa saw how in tune with each other Heero and Duo were and envied them a bit. He hoped that once their links were upped, he and Quatre would be able to communicate the same way. But the links were part of the problem. Quatre had spent so much of his life trying to block himself from the rest of the world, now that he wanted to let someone in he was finding it hard to. Because of the pain he felt every time he lower his barriers, his mind had connected lowering his barriers with pain so much that it was nearly impossible for him to fully lower his barriers.

Trowa knew, by the trickle of feelings that came from Quatre, that it was tearing his love up inside. That he wanted to be one with Trowa, but he couldn't. Trowa knew better that to say anything, knowing it would just hurt his lover more, but he also longed to be one with his soul-mate. As much as he didn't want to wait, he was also that much afraid that Quatre would do something drastic. Trowa would rather never have the links lowered than let Quatre hurt himself trying to do it.

On the other side of the room, Quatre was hastily pulling his clothes on. Quatre wasn't worried about the fighting really, since that wasn't his main duty in the battle. In an earlier discussion with Treize, it had been decided that Quatre would attempt to project a feeling of fear to the opposing soldiers. Trowa would be there to protect him, since he was a skilled warrior and Quatre's mate. Quatre wouldn't have even been allowed on the battlefield had he not needed to be close to the fighters to project his feelings.

Though Quatre knew Trowa's fighting background, and all the additions being a werewolf gave him, and how well Trowa fought, he still couldn't help but be a bit worried. He knew his fear had no real basis, but still couldn't stop himself. The one minute chance that something horrible might happen that would take Trowa away from him forever preyed on his heart. It was difficult for him not to ask Trowa to go somewhere safe and let someone else look after him, but Quatre knew how useless and unconfident that would make Trowa feel. Just because Trowa couldn't read his feelings didn't necessarily mean the opposite wouldn't work, and Quatre felt terrible for that, even before he realize how much Trowa wanted to be in tune with him. He wouldn't be able to look at himself if he did something to make Trowa feel worse. So he stayed silent, and worried in private.

Tensions were high as the castle prepared for battle, every person watching and waiting, praying that their loved ones stayed safe.


	45. God44

God POV

The group converged in the hall, all exiting their rooms at the same. Treize took charge immediately, as was his duty.

"Wufei, take Relena and Chase with you and go to the tower. You take orders from Master O. Relena and Chase should be safe in the tower, since it has the best defenses in the castle. Protect them until you get to the tower, take out as many enemy soldiers as you can without endangering your charges."

"As if you need to tell me that," Wufei muttered with a small smirk. Treize ignored him.

"Heero and Duo, I want you two to head to the front of the forces with Une and see how much damage you can do to the enemy. Quatre, we need you right in the middle of the battle to lower their moral. Trowa, you only need to keep him safe, which I'm sure you're more than capable of," Treize commented, which Trowa replied to with a small smile and a nod. "Sally... Sally has apparently decided that she knows where she is best suited. I'll assume she's gone to get her medical supplies?" Treize asked to Une, since Sally was obviously absent. Une nodded her assent. "Then everybody grab a weapon and head out!"

Treize paused as the others hurried to their given destinations, feeling something was amiss. His eyes settled on Dorothy and Relena. Dorothy was holding Relena's hands in her own, talking to her in low, serious tones. Treize realized, suddenly, that he wasn't sure where Dorothy was going to go or what she was going to do. He wasn't really sure what he wanted her to do. Could he trust her?

"...with me. I don't want you to fight!"

"I have to go, Lena, I could help them. You'll be safe in the tower with Wufei and Master O. It would be cowardly of me to run away from this battle. These people mean a lot to you."

"But not to you?"

"I... I don't know them. I don't think they trust me. But they're important to you, and that's enough for me."

Treize decided that it would be a good idea to interrupt.

"Dorothy, get suited up. If you can pry yourself away from your lover, I think you'd be a big help on the front, with Heero, Duo, and Une. You'll be Une's back-up, so stay close to her."

She gave him a look, signaling that she realized he had placed her near Une not as backup, but as a way to make sure she didn't try to switch sides. Une wouldn't hesitate to kill the girl if she thought Dorothy was betraying them. Then she gave him a small smile, signaling that she appreciated the gesture none the less. After giving a quick hug to her lover, she hurried to suit up with the rest of the soldiers.

Chase looked around in fear as Wufei led them quickly through the crowded halls. Most civilians in the castle were rushing for the tower. Though they were not permitted in the upper rooms of the tower, safety was offered in the many lower rooms of the tower, so long as no one entered the top room and disturbed Master O's magic.

Chase hadn't felt that amount of fear in a long time, maybe not ever. He'd just got his family back, he didn't want to lose it again, and he feared that he was about to. Seeing his bright new world crumbling around him, he reached out and snatched Wufei's hand as it swung in his direction. Wufei looked back at him then, seeing Chase's fear, pulled him forward and swung him into his arms.

"It's going to be alright," he assured. Giving Chase a small smile. Blinking tears from his eyes, Chase threw his arms around Wufei's neck and hugged him tight.

"I don't want to lose my family again," he whispered harshly, "Why do they have to attack now?"

"You're not losing anyone," Wufei assured steadily, still hurrying toward the tower with Chase in his arms, small hands clasped behind Wufei's head, as Wufei glanced back to make sure Relena hadn't fallen behind.

"I'm scared," Chase whispered into Wufei's ear.

"Don't be. I'll protect you."

"But who's going to protect you? And Treize? And Heero and Duo and..."

"Shh. They're capable warriors. You have to trust them. You have to be strong."

"... I'll try."

And then they were at the tower. Wufei glanced behind him and, using one hand to hold Chase, grabbed Relena by the hand and pulled her up the stairs with them, cursing in Chinese when she stumbled on the stairs.

"I should have carried her," Wufei complained quietly to Chase. Chase laughed softly, but Wufei made no move to put him down or lift Relena, so he took it for only a joke and not a hint of some kind.

Wufei pushed the door of the tower open and deposited Chase onto the floor, pointing to a bench to where the he could sit. It was still very early in the morning and if the boy could sleep there was no reason for him not to. Wufei had a feeling it would be a long time before he got to sleep again.

At the front, Duo and Heero stood side by side, watching a large door that led out into the forest bend as the oncoming forces slammed against it. It would only be minutes before the doors gave and all those waiting felt the anxiety of the moment. Unobtrusively, Heero reached out and took Duo's hand, sending his love across their link. Duo smiled as he looked into his love's eyes and took in Heero's love, sending his own back in reply.

Then the doors gave and soldiers poured in. Heero and Duo were swept apart by the massive sea of bodies that flowed through the doors, crashed over the defending army, and swept onward into the castle. Une was screaming orders while taking down soldiers left and right. There was another set of doors maybe sixty feet down the hall.

"Don't let then get past those doors!" she screamed. "We can't let them get past us! We'll stop these bastards right here!" she screamed. She knew the soldiers needed to be pumped up like that, to believe that they were all that stood between the castle and destruction, though they really weren't. Une wasn't overly optimistic about her soldiers. The last time her scouts had sent a number of opposing soldiers to her, they had outnumbered her current troops three to one. Beyond those doors was another set of troops and another set of doors. Beyond them was another set of troops, the real last line of defense.

Quatre and Trowa were somewhere in past the first set of doors. If they could defeat the troops, it was better not to use Quatre and tire him out. Quatre was a bit of a surprise attack, one that Une didn't want to use too soon. Beyond that, battles tended to badly upset the boy, and Une would rather spare him if she could. She didn't think they would be able to spare him, though, because of how strong the opposing forces were. They'd need everything they had, and maybe more.

Une glanced over her shoulder as she took down a soldier dressed in an odd pirate outfit. Une sniffed haughtily, disgusted by someone that would allow their troops to dress however they wanted. Une was harsh about order in her ranks, since disorderly soldiers often meant mistakes. She was well aware that this was not always the case, which was why Treize had created the Night Force to be able to use Duo without putting him in her ranks and, possibly losing one or the other to death or insanity as they would certainly drive each other into the ground.

Une spotted Dorothy quickly and was relieved to see her take down a warrior in some kind of Viking uniform, then turn on one dressed like an Indian. Une didn't trust the girl, but she also didn't want to kill the one person who seemed to bring out the human side of Relena. She planned to watch Dorothy closely, but it would be impossible to keep an eye on her through the entire battle. She had to hope Relena's instincts were right. Une didn't think the princess could take a betrayal by the one person she had learned to love.

Duo cut down a soldier dressed all in blue. It looked like some kind of old British outfit, but that couldn't be right. Russia didn't have any quarrel with Brittan, nor did the British have anything to gain from attacking them. Beyond that, it would take far too long to get British troops there than would be realistic. It would just cost too much. Even if they magically transported them, it would take far too much magic out of the sorcerer to get any sizeable army across that distance.

Duo checked on Heero, who was taking down a large soldier with his sword. A small, rat-like soldier snuck up behind him as Heero fought with the large man. Duo shifted his favorite weapon, a scythe, from one hand to the other, then brought it down across the small man's neck. His head rolled a few feet, then came to rest at the wall. The man's eyes were open but unseeing, his mouth open in a silent scream. Across his forehead there was some kind of odd tattoo. As Duo glanced around, he saw the same tattoos on every other enemy soldier. Duo decided these guy's were seriously dedicated to their leader, to get their faces tattooed as a sign of allegiance.

Duo shifted his dark blue soldier uniform, standard for all soldiers. Usually he didn't wear one, but he didn't want someone cutting him down because they thought he was from the other forces. In the chaos of battle, it wouldn't be a hard thing to do. Now, seeing all the odd uniforms of the other forces, he decided he had made the right decision. The menagerie of uniforms was probably some kind of scare tactic, but it would have made it hard to tell friend from foe had their forces not all been in the same uniform.

Heero finished up with the enemy he was fighting, then glanced at where his link told him Duo would be. He knew, because of the link, that Duo was fine, but it still made him feel better to see that Duo was alright. Duo had sustained a long scratch to his arm, but was otherwise unharmed. Duo was still fighting, completely ignoring his injury. Heero had expect nothing less. Duo could have to broken legs and a missing arm and still fight like nothing was wrong, Heero thought with a small, enduring smile. Heero glanced around and saw that the rest of the troops were beginning to tire. If they enemy didn't break through the doors soon, Une would have to throw them open, simply to keep the troops on this side from being slaughtered before the troops on the other could come to their aid.

As Heero was realizing this, Une was already yelling to her men on the other side to open the doors. Two hours of intense battle was all her soldiers could handle; better to let the wounded and tired soldiers fall back than to sentence them to death.

The enemy pushed passed the defenders as soon as the doors opened, ignoring the weakened defending soldiers to get deeper into the castle. They ran into a wall of fire, courtesy of Master O, but soon pushed passed it, the soldiers in the back pushing the soldiers in the front into the wall until the strain was too much and it broke.

Beyond the second wall, with the last line of defense, Treize listened to the sounds of battle coming closer. If the enemy got as far as the third line of defense, Treize would battle with his troops. If his armies fell, he was better off dead, for he would never allow Noventa to take his thrown. Master O was under orders to orb Relena and Chase directly to Zechs if the castle fell. Once there, Zechs would flee with his wife, daughter, sister, and Chase back to the Sanq kingdom. He wouldn't allow him to think of what might happen to Wufei; the thought would make him run back to his beloved and hold him close, to keep him safe. For once in his life, he wished he wasn't a leader, a king. He wished he could do what his heart told him and forget everything else.

Trowa leaped over a fallen soldier in his dog form and locked his jaws around a man's throat, killing him only seconds before he would have caved Quatre's head in. Quatre was distracted, Trowa could easily tell. Quatre wasn't an excellent fighter because he didn't like violence, but he was a lot better than allowing someone to sneak up behind him.

"Quatre," Trowa called once he had shifted back into his human form, but Quatre didn't seem to hear him.

"Quatre!" he called again, louder than before, "What's wrong?"

"I can't feel anything..." Quatre replied, his eyes looking around him hollowly.

"What do you mean?" Trowa asked, leading him away from the battle, his eyes constantly scanning for danger. Trowa found a small corner and pushed Quatre into it and shielding him with his body.

"I can't feel anyone's emotions. I... can't feel it."

Trowa knew that Quatre had a sort of bond with everyone, and that part of the reason they had never been able to fully link; Quatre was afraid Trowa wouldn't be able to handle that kind of link. Trowa also knew that, while Quatre did his best to block out as many of the extra emotions as he could, he was never completely without them.

"Is someone blocking you?" Trowa asked.

"I-I don't know. I can still feel our troops, just not theirs. So it can't be... I don't think... I don't understand, even plants and animals have emotions. I can't understand..." he trailed off, his eyes finally coming to rest on Trowa. "It's like their not even human."

A second later, his eyes filled with understand and horror.

"We have to get to Master O!"

Treize listened to the sounds of battle on the others side of the of the door. Even as the sounds of battle still raged on the other side, pounding of men trying to force the door down began. It was like they were getting anxious, impatient even.

The second door fell more quickly than the first. The first troop of soldiers had just finished getting their wounded to the medical wing when they were called back to help fight with the final defense. The medics were sent to fetch the wounded from the battlefield themselves, of which Sally was one of the first on the field.

In all the chaos, no one noticed one dark figure, a long dagger hidden under its cape, sneaking passed the clashing forces and into the center of the castle.

Wufei waited at the bottom of the tower. He was to guard the tower from any stray soldiers that got passed the soldiers. If the castle's forces were overcome... but he wouldn't let himself think of that. So far he had only used his magic to toast two stray soldiers, but he feared there would be many more before the night was over.

Which was why he was not surprised when a lone figure rounded the corner. Wufei smiled, glad to have an opponent if only to distract him from his worry. Wufei jumped at his opponent, intending to use physical battle instead of his magic skills as he had on the other two.

Wufei was greatly surprised to be frozen midair. Instantly, he attempted to free himself by casting a spell, but nothing he did could free him.

"My, my, my, what have we here?"

Wufei gasped and looked at the figure as it pushed back its hood.

"Noventa!"

"Who did you expect? Though I must say, I never expected to see you here. Imagine my surprise, after going through all the trouble of killing you family and setting you up to be accused of sorcery, that you really are a sorcerer. You could have saved me a lot of trouble had you simply confessed."

"I'll kill you!" Wufei screamed, trying to tear free of the spell.

"Not unless you can get free," Noventa said, smiling maliciously while taking out a small paintbrush. "This seal should hold you while I complete my business with your master."

Quickly, Noventa painted a circle around the place where Wufei hovered, then painted several small symbols inside the circle. Wufei could tell that Noventa planned to attack Master O, since he never would have bothered with a spell to seal him if he hadn't needed all his power for a battle.

With a cackle, Noventa finished his spell and left, moving quickly up the stairs. Wufei lowered his head in sorrow and shame. He had allowed an enemy to pass him, anything that happened because of that would be all his fault. If Master O died...

Wufei pulled as hard as he could, trying to move just an inch and break the spell. The veins in his arms and neck came out and the muscles in his arms and legs pulled as hard as they could. Tears ran down his face from pain, but he wouldn't let go. He pulled until his vision wavered, then he blacked out.

Te next thing Wufei heard was the sound of approaching footsteps. Groggily, Wufei lifted his head just in time to see Quatre and Trowa round the corner.

"Wufei!" Quatre cried, running toward his friend, then seemed to change his mind as he ran passed him. "Trowa, help Wufei!" he called to his lover.

Quatre ran for the stairs, but suddenly ran into some kind of invisible wall and was knocked backward.

"Quatre!" Trowa cried.

"I'm fine!" Quatre said harshly. "We have to get up there!"

"Quatre, quickly, erase the symbols on the floor!" Wufei yelled. "I can undo the spell, if I can just get free!" Quatre nodded, then crawled to the circle and began rubbing at the symbols. Trowa, after a moment of hesitation because of concern for Quatre, also knelt and began to help.

"Where's Master O?" Quatre asked.

"In the tower..." Wufei said, about to explain that he was desperate to get down to help him fight against Noventa.

"We have to get to him!" Quatre cried, "We need him to kill Noventa, he's the only one strong enough to do it! Once Noventa's dead, this whole battle will be over."

"Quatre," Trowa interrupted, "I trust you, but I don't think I understand. How does killing Noventa end that battle? The soldiers will still be here, even without a leader."

"That's it," Quatre replied, a fanatical light coming into his eyes, "They aren't real soldiers. They're dead. Don't you get it? Noventa's a necromancer. If Master O can just kill him, this whole nightmare will be over."

"But," Wufei interrupted, "Noventa just went to battle Master O. He's the one that put me here. Why would he go to do battle with the only person that could destroy him?"

"He means to burn us all!" Quatre cried, becoming distraught, "He means to break the spell and cover all of Haven in lava!"

In the tower, Chase paced from the window, to Relena, to the table, and back to the window restlessly. He was worried about Wufei and Treize. He was scared that he would lose his two new parents so soon after he had just gained them and he wanted to go help them. He tried once, but didn't get as far as the door.

"Stop pacing," Master O admonished for the fifth time, "Sit down."

Chase, obedient by nature, promptly did as he was told.

"Do you think Wufei is alright?" he asked.

"For the twenty-third time, yes, Wufei is..." Master O stopped, looking toward the door anxiously. "Both of you, behind the books, quickly!" Master O ordered.

The two just had enough time to duck behind a stack of books when the door exploded inward. Noventa entered regally, his head held high in proud snobbery.

"Master O, so good to see you again."

"And you. I thought I had seen the last of you when we parted in the mountains. I was sure someone would put a stop to your evil ways."

"And yet I am, still alive and stronger than ever. Stronger than you even, my former teacher."

"You always were full of yourself, especially when you learned to harness the dead."

"Ah yes, the one thing that you could never do. It was very poor form of you to leave me in the mountains to die, buried under a mountain of rocks, simply because of your own jealousy."

"The dead should not be tampered with! Have you no respect for you ancestors? If you wish to fight a battle, fight it yourself, don't hide behind the bodies of the dead!"

"Still so naive. Here I am, about to become the strongest sorcerer in the world, and you still try to argue ethics. You haven't changed a bit."

"I suppose it was too much for me to hope that you had. You were always so full of yourself, o hungry for power. You're still the same conceited brat I met all those years ago."

"Yes, and thanks to you I had to wait years to gain the power I would need for this attack. But now all that hard work has paid off."

"Why now? Why here? This country is just recovering from the last war, another will devistate it."

"I didn't want to start here. As a matter of fact, I was expecting that once I had the east conquered that this country would surrender, but, unfortunately, you have something I need. I can't control the dragons without my warriors, and my warriors are here."

"Dorothy..."

"And a male warrior. Dorothy was supposed to capture him, but she failed. No matter, once I take over this country I'll take my warriors and use them to harness the power of the dragons, then I'll be unbeatable."

"You will never rule this country!"

"Oh, I don't just want this country. I want the world!"

Noventa smiled viciously and bowed, keeping his eyes on Master O. After a small sigh, Master O mirrored his opponent's move. Noventa's smile widened just a fraction, but O saw it and managed to dodge as Noventa cast a spell at him.

And the battle had begun.

At the bottom of the tower, the last symbol finally disappeared from the floor. Sounds of explosions and battle had been raging for several minutes. Wufei was getting more and more afraid for the safety not only of Master O but also for Chase and Relena.

Wufei hit the floor at a run, already muttering the chant and making symbols with his hands to bring down the invisible wall. When he hit the steps, there was only the smallest amount of resistance before the wall crumbled and allowed Wufei to dash up the stairs, followed by Trowa and Quatre.

They opened the door just in time for Wufei to catch Master O as he crumbled to the floor, a dagger in his chest. The room around them was completely destroyed. Any furniture O had used was splintered into a thousand pieces. Most of the books were completely burned, and two of the walls had gaping holes in them. It looked like a battleground as Wufei gently lowered his teacher to the floor, then looked at Noventa.

Noventa was holding Relena by the throat, dangling her in the air.

"Move and the girl dies!" Noventa threatened.

"Coward!" Master O rasped from the floor, "To hide behind a girl. You are weak. You shame yourself."

"Quiet, old man, or have you forgotten that you're about to die? I've defeated you, the strongest sorcerer in the world, and now there is nothing to stop me from taking over the entire world!"

"That's where you're wrong," the dying man continued, "The strong will fight you with everything they have. Magic or not, demon or human, there is no difference. You magic makes you weak as much as Wufei's makes him strong. The strength lies within."

"Ah, your prized new pupil. You think he can save you? You are truly foolish! He's a boy, a mere child. He's a weakling; he couldn't even break my holding spell."

"He's right, Master," Wufei said, his head lowered in shame. "I couldn't even break free of a simple spell like that. I'm weak."

"You are stronger than you think, my boy. You will show your strength when you need to," he said, then closed his eyes. Gently, Wufei lowered him to the floor.

"I will not let you get away with this!" Wufei screamed, calling up a fireball. He hurled it at Noventa, by Noventa easily deflected it back at him. Wufei ducked out of the way, then prepared to attack again. He leaped at Noventa, flames circled around his fists, but again Noventa halted him in the air, causing the fire around his fists to go out.

"You never learn, do you?" Noventa asked, advancing on Wufei's prone form. "Weaklings shouldn't fight battles."

With a wave of his hand, Noventa threw Wufei into a wall, causing Wufei to hit his head hard enough for him to see spots. He felt a trickle of blood run down his neck as he tried to stand. Noventa didn't give him a chance. Once Wufei was on his knees, Noventa kicked him in the stomach, rolling him onto his back where the sorcerer proceeded to kick Wufei in the stomach, face, and legs. Trowa, though he knew that he was outclassed, couldn't stand to see his friend beaten any more. Quickly he shifted into wolf form, then leaped at Noventa.

But Noventa disappeared just before he would have sunk his teeth into his back. Confused, Trowa sniffed the ground, then Wufei, unaware of what was happening behind him.

Quatre, however, could clearly see the fog rising behind Trowa as it condensed into the form of a man. Noventa raised his dagger, impatient to be finished with the battle, and prepared to bring it down on the unsuspecting wolf's back. Quatre realized that even if he yelled to warn Trowa, it would be too late before Trowa realized what was happening and leaped to safety. But what could he do?

In a moment of clarity, Quatre realized what he had to do. He threw open his link with Trowa, knowing that his love would be dead if he didn't. In the space of a heartbeat the two became one as their hearts and minds were finally linked fully together, sharing everything, hiding nothing. The pain of a thousand people hit Trowa and, he being one that wasn't overly emotional, overpowered him. Trowa threw back his head and screamed in pain as Quatre pushed the image of Noventa behind him into his mind and closed the link. The pain gone, Trowa forced himself to turn his attention back to the fight, and leave the repercussions of what had just happened until later.

Trowa saw the image of himself and Noventa in Quatre's mind just a second before Noventa brought the knife down. Luckily, Trowa managed to dodge out of the way, leaving Noventa to bring his knife down through nothing but air. In rage, Noventa stepped back and, throwing the still squirming Relena to the ground, threw a ball of electricity at Quatre. Trowa tried to push him out of the way, but only managed to get hit himself. The two fell to the ground together, unconscious.

Noventa turned his attention back to the still struggling Wufei, who was once again getting to his knees, be it more labored than the last.

"I've had all I can take of you!" Noventa growled, calling a ball of electricity to his raised hand.

A small shape darted out of the darkness and leaped at Noventa, biting and tearing at him.

"Don't hurt my dad!"

In the main hall, Duo and Heero were still fighting the enemy soldiers. Both had minor injuries, but were fine save for utter exhaustion. Both could see that they were getting tired, lethargic, and were watching each other all the more because of it. One mistake, one reaction too late, could cost one of them his life.

The enemy didn't seem to be tiring in the least. It was like they were invulnerable, one would fall just as another would pop up from no where to take his place, fully rested and ready to fight.

"Hey Treize!" Duo called as he fought an enemy with his scythe. The enemy managed to get the scythe out of Duo's hands and threw it across the floor, but Duo impaled him on his own sword then turned to retrieve his weapon. "Where're all these guy's comin' from?"

"I don't know!" Treize yelled back, doing battle with a hulk of a man, "There shouldn't be this many! I'm going to see if Master O knows anything!"

"You do tha..." Duo stopped. Behind Heero was a large man with a sword, in front was a large man with a club. Duo sent out a warning over their link, but he knew there was nothing Heero could do. If he turned from one opponent, the other would strike. Weaponless and running short on time, Duo defended Heero with only thing he had left; his own body. Jumping in front of Heero, he put his chest between Heero and the enemy's sword. The last thing Duo felt was the cold blade biting into the skin of his chest.

"Duo! No!"

In the tower, Noventa finally got a good grip on the thing that was biting him and held it in front of his face. In his fist was a small, squirming boy trying his best to tear the sorcerer to pieces.

"Well, what have we here? A little street-rat, eh? I think you'd make a nice bird, my pet."

"Don't you touch him!" Wufei growled, managing to get to his feet, though he had to use the wall for support.

"Ah, so the annoyance can stand. And how do you think you're going to stop me from doing whatever I want? You're barely on your feet as it is."

"I won't let you hurt him!" Wufei snarled, ignoring the pain in his body.

Chase, meanwhile, saw his opening and whipped around to but Noventa's wrist, causing him to drop the boy. Chase hit the ground and rolled toward Wufei, jumping to his feet to run toward his protector.

"Oh no you don't, you little rat!" Noventa hissed, using a spell in the form of a snake to try to grab the boy. Wufei was faster, though, and managed to get in front of Chase, pushing him out of the way.

"You will not harm my son!" Wufei screamed. Noventa threw back his head and laughed.

"You think you can stop me? Well go ahead! Let's see you try!"

Noventa stood there, arms at his sides, a superior smirk on his face. Wufei felt the power inside him boil like he had never felt before, knowing that if he let this man live he would kill his lover and his son, destroy everything that had become precious to him along with everything that had been precious to him.

In a second all that power spilled from his hands and surrounded Noventa in a mass of power and anger. Never had Wufei felt a power that strong and it both awed and frightened him that he would contain such power. It seemed to surprise Noventa, too, and in a moment he was nothing but dust. Wufei collapsed to the floor, utterly exhausted.

In the great hall, Heero disposed of the enemy in front of him. He turned just in time to see a large, brutish man stab him in the chest.

"No! Duo!" he screamed, seeing his world collapse as the sword entered Duo's chest, driving toward his heart.

And then the man was gone. Simply vanished into thin air. Heero leaped forward and caught Duo as he fell to the floor, pulling the sword out of his chest. Blood gushed out of the wound as Heero laid love's limp body on the floor. Holding his breath in fear, Heero pressed his cheek against Duo's chest to listen for a heartbeat.

There was still a strong beat in Duo's chest. Heero sat back, cradling Duo's limp form against him and thanking the stars that he was still alive. It was during this time that the wall began to shake.

"Wufei," Treize called softly, shaking his unconscious lover, "Wufei, wake up."

"Treize?" Wufei asked, groggily sitting up.

"That's right, love, how do you feel?"

"Where's Chase? Is he alright? And Relena? Trowa! And Quatre! Are they hurt?"

"Slow down, love. Everyone's fine. Except maybe you and..."

"Master O!"

Wufei tried to jump up, but only managed to make it to his knees before falling over into Treize.

"Please," Wufei asked, "I need to get to him. I may be able to save him." Treize nodded and lifted his lover, carrying him to where Master O laid. O smiled as he saw Wufei set down on his knees beside him.

"Master!"

"Wufei, you're looking well," O said with a smile, "I'm sure you feel about as good as you look."

"Be quiet! Save your strength, you'll need it after I heal you," Wufei hissed as he readied for the spell.

"Ah, but you won't be doing that." Wufei stilled.

"What?"

"You won't be healing me. There's no use in it, that knife was poisoned. Besides, you're going to need all your strength. You have to take over my ultimate spell, the one that contains the volcano under Haven. The spell should start to crumble... now."

Under Haven, the sleeping volcano woke and began to stretch its limbs toward the surface, shaking the castle and everyone inside. The spell that had held it for so many years was gone, and the thin layer of rocks would only hold it so long. Without mercy, the volcano shook the castle above it.

"I can't do it! You have to let me heal you, so that you can contain the volcano! I'm too weak! I..."

"Wufei, do you think I would ask you to do this if there was any other option open? I can't be saved, but the castle can. You are stronger than you think. This is what I've been training you for; not as my apprentice, but as my replacement. You can do this."

"I can't!"

"You can!"

"I can't!"

"You must!"

Wufei looked around, at Relena, watching anxiously for Dorothy's approach, at Trowa and Quatre, curled unconscious together on the floor, at Chase, looking expectantly at him from Treize's lap, and at Treize, his eyes shining with trust and pride. Everyone was putting their faith in him, and he would not disappoint them.

Wufei allowed his head to fall back, focusing all his power on the spell that he had to cast. He allowed the spell to flow through him, as he had in training, let himself feel the power of the volcano. Then, roping it with his power, he harnessed it, let its anger flow into him, let it empower him. The volcano was not simply a spectator in this. It fought, tried to escape, but Wufei held tight. After a moment the volcano stopped and seemed to judge Wufei. Whatever it found, it must have been pleased, because it suddenly let all of its power flow out of the mountain and into the boy.

When it was all over, the castle was still and Wufei was exhausted. Physically, since he could feel that his magical power was now multiplied tenfold.

"So now you know," Master O said quietly, "The volcano empowers you, instead of draining your power. However, only the strongest sorcerers can harness that power without being killed."

"Master, is there anything I can do for you?" Wufei asked, guilt welling up inside him at the knowledge that he would not be able to save his beloved master. O was quiet for a moment.

"I'm old, my time has come. Not even magic can save a life when it is truly time for them to go. But, if you could, I would like to see my family one last time before I die. I've stopped the bleeding, I have until sunrise at most. I would ask only one thing of you."

"Anything, master."

"Orb me to my home. If nothing else, I wish to reconcile with my brother before I go. I've missed him so. And, and let my owl go, I always told him he'd be free again one day."

"Of course, master."

With his new found strength, Wufei orbed Master O back to his home in China and his brother. With a sparkle of light and a content smile, Master O was gone. Wufei, tired from the day's trials, toppled forward into Treize's waiting arms, asleep.


	46. Trowa45

Trowa POV

The tower was completely destroyed after the battle. Much of the main hall, basement, and outside cliff had also been destroyed by both the invading armies and the earthquakes caused by the volcano. Over half of the army was wounded, though, due to Une's careful training and preparations, relatively few were killed.

Sally was swamped. All available hospital beds were full and there weren't enough being brought in for all the patients coming up from the battle. It was for this reason that, only minutes after waking up, I was asked to take Quatre and go to our room, since neither of us had acquired life threatening injuries. Quatre probably would have wanted to stay, since Duo was still unconscious, but Heero was with hi, curled around him like some kind of protective viper. That's actaully what he looked like when I first entered, a snake ready to strike if I made any wrong move. I was told by a young nurse when leaving that he had done that to every person that had entered the room since he had arrived. It seemed that the leftover battle adrenaline combined with concern for his lover had left Heero a little... less than enthusiastic about company. I wisely left him alone. Quietly, I carried Quatre back to our room and put him to bed, then laid down beside him for some well-needed rest.

Quatre woke hours later. As expected, he insisted we race to the hospital to check on Duo. I wasn't surprised to find that Duo's condition had not changed. Sally had said that it could be days before Duo awoke, do to the extent of the injury he received. The sword hadn't pierced anything vital, but it had been deep and had taken a long time for Sally to staunch the bleeding.

Quatre did manage to force Heero to come get something to eat with us, then managed to coerce him into going back to his room for a shower and a change of clothes before leading him back to his lover. It was difficult for Quatre to persuade Heero to come with us, which speaks volumes Heero's dedication and stubbornness when it comes to Duo, but it was obvious that Heero both wanted and needed a shower, a fact that Quatre exploited mercilessly for his advantage. There isn't a lot Quatre won't do for his friends, and forcing them to take care of themselves was something he'd had a lot of practice at.

I wasn't upset that Quatre was focusing most of his energy on Heero. Actually, I was a bit relieved. The repercussions of the fact that Quatre had opened himself to me and I hadn't been able to handle it haunted me. I began to wonder if we were really meant to be together, if Quatre would ever trust me again, if we could ever share a bond or if we were forever cursed to be together but still apart.

I have to wonder if Quatre weren't worried about it, too, because he hounded Heero, asking him if there was anything he needed and trying to be helpful even if Heero wasn't in a most appreciating mood. I think, perhaps, Quatre was trying to distract himself just as much as I was, or maybe more.

I also had another worry to think about. The new moon was coming up and, while it didn't affect me as the full moon did, it did affect me to the same degree. I would have find away to get away from Haven that night and all the next day and perhaps meet up with a pack of wolves for that time period. Somehow, I would have to get away from Quatre and everyone at Haven.

Quatre had to go see Wufei as soon as Heero was once again tucked in beside Duo, drifting into a deep slumber. Quatre could remember the battle with Noventa and, because we had both been knocked unconscious during the battle, was quite worried about his fried though Sally insisted he was fine. We found Wufei sleeping in his room, exhausted, one side taken by the young Chase, the other protected by Treize. All three were sleeping, so we simply backed out silently and closed the door.

We had already seen Une when we talked to Sally, and Relena and Dorothy were also both in the medical wing, Dorothy lecturing Relena to be more careful, so the last person Quatre needed to check in on was Master O. It was odd, I hadn't seen him in the medical wing. I had thought he would have been helping Sally heal the soldiers.

It was Relena who revealed to us, teary-eyed and crestfallen, that Master O had been killed. Quatre couldn't seem to accept it at first, but when he did it seemed that he was going to have a breakdown, so I hurried him back to our room. Quatre holds his friends very dear to him and it hurts him immensely to lose them. Because of his link with the world, he is able to be closer to everyone than most people are to one person, save linked couples. What I'm trying to get across is that when Quatre loses a friend, it's like he's losing a part of himself. It's hard to bear losing a piece of your soul.

I took Quatre back to our room, got him into his nightclothes, put him in bed, and curled him against me. It was only then, in my embrace, that he allowed himself to cry. Quatre worries a lot about his image. He knows, because of his boyish looks, that people often think him weak. It's very important for him to prove them wrong, or, at least, not to prove them right. He holds his feeling inside him and, at times like these, they erupt, causing a release of pressure or mental damage, depending on the situation. For Quatre to have allowed me to see him that way spoke volumes of his trust for me. I couldn't help but feel it bittersweet, though, at a time we were getting closer we were still unable to meet minds, something other couples did easily. It preyed on my mind again as Quatre slept peacefully in my arms.

There was no body for us to bury in honor of Master O, so the funeral was more of a memorial than anything. Without physical evidence of his death, though we were all certain he was dead, it was difficult to feel that he was actually gone. It wasn't as though we had laid anything to rest, so many of us still felt that Master O was with us, simply some place else. I wasn't close enough to him to be affect that strongly, but Quatre and Treize and especially Wufei were extremely upset during the service. Treize hadn't even wanted to let Wufei come, since he was still feeling the effects of taking over Master O's spells and the battle with Noventa, but Wufei had been adamant that he be allowed to come, and eventually Treize backed off, allowing that Wufei didn't stay long. The young prince-to-be was also along, clinging tightly to either Wufei or Treize the entire time. The battle had shaken him up quite a bit, but he was handling it well. Heero also stopped down to pay his last respects, but didn't like to be away from Duo, who was still unconscious, so left soon. Relena was one of the most... vocal mourners, sobbing loudly until Dorothy led her into a corner and calmed her for fear that she would begin to hyperventilate.

The actual service might not have helped, but it seemed that talking to the others about Master O helped Quatre quite a bit. He seemed much better when we returned to our room that night so I decided that the service was time well spent.

The next few days would turn out to be very busy for all of us. Beyond the rebuilding that needed to take place, planning for Chase's coronation as prince also had to be handled. Quatre and I weren't able to spend much time together because of this. With Treize and Wufei still recovering from battle, Quatre was called away to make the preparations for the coronation. Meanwhile, with Duo and Heero both out of it, I was the only member of Night Force left, so all responsibilities for that fell to me, along with helping the construction crews with some of their heavier projects when my inhuman strength was needed.

It happened because of this that whenever Quatre would be coming in I would be heading out, and the reverse. We barely saw each other for the next couple of days, and when we did come in for the night we were both dead tired. Of course, some parts of it had to be that neither of us wanted to think or talk about what had happened during the battle. That made it just a little bit easier for me to talk a few extra minutes walking to our room, or leave just a few minutes early for work. Whatever the reason, we successfully managed to avoid talking about our link.

I was able to learn that the full moon would happen in three day's time; five days from the battle with Noventa and four day's from Master I's service. I figured that by that time the construction crews would have a good start on the castle repairs and I would be able to sweep every underground tunnel for people caught because of the earthquake. That would still give me most of the day to get away from Haven. Treize knew my predicament, so I doubted he would stand in my way. I decided it would be best not to worry Quatre about it, so I didn't tell him. I was also a bit worried that Quatre would try and keep me in the castle, as he had last time. Things were different under the new moon, and I couldn't risk that he'd come after me. I concluded that, since our link wasn't open, he wouldn't be able to read my thoughts and know my plan until it was already too late, at which time Treize could tell him where I had gone.

Apparently, though I couldn't read Quatre's thoughts, he was still perfectly able to read mine.

"Trowa! You can't leave! Do you have any idea what's out there? We still don't know if Noventa was working alone, you could be walking straight into an ambush!"

"Quatre, I have to go. I'm a werewolf, the woods are my home, I'll be fine. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing."

"But why can't you just stay here like last time?"

"It's different this time. I can't stay near people this time, it's too dangerous."

Quatre's face darkened in anger, something I had never seen before, and I wondered just what the hell I had said so wrong.

"You're just running away from this! You won't even talk to me about it!"

We had been fighting about this for hours, ever since I had entered the room hoping to grab a nap and a kiss before leaving. I only had an hour or so before the moon would rise and I needed to leave soon or I wouldn't make it outside the city limits before I started to change.

"Quatre, I'm sorry, but I have to leave. Whatever it is you want to talk about will have to wait until after I come back. Please, I need you to understand, this is for your own safety. If I don't leave now you could be hurt and I couldn't live with myself if that happened. I'll see you when I get back. Goodbye."

I turned and walked out the door. Or, at least, that was what I intended on doing. I remember turning around, but nothing after that.

I woke up chained to a wall. My previous encounters with this kind of situation told me to stay still and not let them know I was awake until I knew exactly what was going on. I sniffed, my now partually wolf senses lettng me know exactly who was in the room with me and I opened my eyes quickly.

"Quatre!"

Quatre was sitting in a corner of the little cell, which was barely big enough for me to stretch my legs but was long enough for Quatre to sit a good two feet away from me. He jerked a bit when I called his name, but didn't turn to face me.

"I'm sorry," was all he said. I wanted to tell him it was alright, but it wasn't. He needed to leave; I could already feel the moon starting to affect me.

"Get out of here," I told him gruffly, though not harshly. I've never ben able to speak harshly to Quatre, he's always so calm and good natured, it's hard to get made at him.

"I won't leave. That's what I told you on the maganac's ship and I still mean it know," he said quietly, still not looking at me. A part of my heart contracted with affection at the memory, but another part was screaming at him to leave before he got hurt. The screaming part won out.

"This isn't like that! I'm telling you to leave! I knew I wouldn't kill you then, but this... this is different! I'm telling you to get out of here!"

"And I'm telling you I won't!" he yelled, whirling around to face me. "I won't let you run from this without even talking to me about it! I won't let this break us apart! You're closer to me than anyone's ever been before and I... and I..."

Slowly, the anger drained out of him and he sank to the floor, gratefully just beyond my reach. I knew he was weakening and wanted to tell him to leave, but the look in his eyes kept me from saying anything brash, knowing that if I turned him away know I might never see him again.

"You what?" I asked softly, wishing the night was over so I could hold him in my arms.

"I'm sorry," he whispered brokenly.

"For what?"

"For not being stronger. For not being able to link with you. For hurting you. For the voices. For..."

He stopped as I laughed ruefully, looking at me with startled, hurt eyes.

"Love," I said, moving so that I was sitting instead of leaning up against the wall, "It isn't your fault. You know that, and I know that you can't control the voices..."

"But I can!" he said, leaning dangerously forward in his burst of emotion, "Or, at least, I could when I was younger, but I've forgotten how. I thought, when you needed me that I'd forget the voices but I couldn't and now you hate me!" he said, tears rimming his eyes, then covered his mouth as though he couldn't believe what he had just said. He went to run for the exit, but in order to get there he had to step over a chain that connected me to the wall. I managed to come back to my senses at just the right moment to pull the chain up and trip him, then pulled him back by his ankle. He wasn't getting away after a confession like that. I pushed him back against the far wall and put myself between him and the door, cutting off his exit. I wasn't reckless enough to hold him in my arms, though I wanted to desperately. Sitting in the corner, his knees pulled up to his chest, he looked so broken an hopeless it almost made me forget my common sense and hold him, but the repercussions of my actions would be to high to ignore, so I simply waited for him to compose himself before asking my questions.

"What are you talking about? I don't understand, explain."

"I..." he hesitated, "I was able to ignore the voices when I was younger, I remember, because I was able to enjoy riding and nature without thousands of voices interrupting me, but I don't remember how I did it anymore. I know... I know my power has grown since I was little, but I thought that I would at least be able to reduce it to save you, but instead I hurt you and you nearly died and... and..." I could see the rugged cliff that Quatre was edging toward was crumbling beneath him and has was soon going to fall. I only wished he had let himself feel all the emotions he had bottled up during the battle at a more convenient time, a time when I could hold and comfort him as I longed to.

"Quatre, " I said softly, leaning as close to him as I dared, "You can't blame yourself for this. You did everything you could to protect me. It was my fault. I wanted to be linked with you so badly that I didn't thnk about what it was doing to you, to not be able to be one with me. You only wanted to protect me, to give me what I wanted. It was selfish of me and I'm sorry. Don't let this tare you apart like this. It's alright; I still love you."

Quatre burst out crying and I wondered just what I had said wrong this time.

"Then why won't you hold me?" Quatre cried, lunging at me. I tried to dodge, but I was so surprised that I didn't move fast enough and Quatre managed to grab a hold of me. The force of Quatre's movement carried him forward and I ended up on my back, with him on lap.

I tried to fight it, but the need was too strong. It was a hunger, like I had never eaten before, a thirst, like I had been in a desert all my life. It was like air, I needed it, I wanted it, and I couldn't stop myself.

I grabbed him and kissed him deeply, forcing my tongue into his mouth, which had opened in surprise. His lips were soft beneath mine and, though he didn't return the kiss, he didn't fight it. I was anxious, though, ready to move from the kiss to more... interesting things and quickly ended it, then flipped us over, putting him on the floor beneath me. He didn't struggle, still too shocked by what was happening. Quickly, before he could recover, I pulled on his shirt, which, luckily, was button down. The buttons came undone one by one as I pulled his shirt off, tossing it away.

He gasped beneath me, even more surprised by my sudden action. I began licking his chest, biting down on his nipples lightly. His skin was beautiful, pale and perfect over his slim frame. His muscles tensed as I moved my tongue over them, contracting under my mouth. I allowed my hand to first circle his bellybutton, then to slide lower, teasing the short hairs that peaked out from the top of his pants, then finally coming to rest over his manhood, which was firm and impatient in my grip. I wondered absently how such a beauty had come to me, but dismissed it as unimportant.

He gasped, groaned, and whimpered under me, but I could tell by the tenseness of his body that he was starting to come to his senses, so I decided I needed to move quicker, no matter how much I would have liked to play longer. He seemed inexperienced, maybe I could get done before he even realized what was going on.

I leaned away from him, quickly yanking off my own shirt, then backed up even more and pulled off his pants, then his own. He was panting, from fear or excitement, I didn't know. He stared at me with startled, confused, and slightly frightened eyes as I put my body over his, rubbing our chests and groins together. His body tensed even more and his eyes went from frightened to scared. I knew he was finally realizing what was going on, but it was too late. I raised his legs over my shoulders and prepared to take him, my heavy, swollen member more than ready for this part of the encounter.

"Trowa don't!" he cried and I froze.

This wasn't just some boy who happened along a the wrong time. This wasn't a merc would give back to me a thousand times what I gave to him. This wasn't some prostitute used to being taken roughly. It was Quatre.

I threw myself to the side, falling heavily on the rough concrete as I made no move to catch myself. I fought every instinct put into me, telling me to grab my mate before he got away.

"Quatre," I ground, holding myself rigid, "Get out of here!"

"Why? Trowa what's going on? And what was all of that? What's happening to you?" Quatre asked, concerned, confused, and scared. I didn't have time to explain because I could feel my control snapping.

"Quatre if you love me you will get the hell out of this cell and lock the door!" I screamed. That served to get him into action, as he got up and ran out of the cell, slamming the door shut behind him. He was almost too late. When I heard the door slam shut, I lost control and tried to chase after him. I was still shackled to the wall, but the restraints didn't hold out on against my inhuman strength and I was soon throwing myself against the bars of my cell, terrifying poor Quatre, who watched from the other side. Eventually, I slumped to the floor, exhausted.

Quatre came to kneel before me, on the other side of the bars. He slipped his hand in and went to wipe the sweat from my brow, but I jerked my head away. It as still too tempting for him to touch me. He looked hurt when I did that, but there was a bit of understanding in his eyes, too.

"Is this why you wanted to leave so badly?" he asked quietly. I nodded silently, but decided that Quatre deserved a better answer.

"It's the new moon's affect on me. During the new moon werewolves... we go into heat. We'll fuck anything in the vicinity, no matter who or what it is. Back there, when I... I didn't even know who you were. I didn't want you to get hurt, and I didn't want you to see me like this so..." I trailed off. He knew the rest.

"How long does this last?"

"Only tonight. It's not like the full moon. It only lasts one night but I can feel the effects for a few days afterwards."

"Would it... Would it help if I had sex with you?"

"No!" I yelled so harshly that Quatre jumped. I calmed myself and tried again. "Don't even think about it Quatre. I don't want our first time to be like this and I don't want to hurt you. If I took you now, I wouldn't even know you. I know I wouldn't be gentle and I won't have my wolf blood tainting you like that. Don't even think about it. No."

"Alright, I understand. In that case, can I get you anything."

"A hooker," I said moodily before I could stop myself. Quatre looked physically sick at the suggestion. "I wasn't serious," I assured, though I had only been half joking.

"What... What did you do when you were with the mercinaries?" Quatre asked hesitantly. Quatre was always hesitant to ask about the mercinaries; he didn't want to remind me of bad memories.

"Sometimes it was the same as the full moon, they'd lock me up. Other times I'd managed to trick one into letting me take him, but that only worked once in a while and usually got me in big trouble afterwards. More often a group of them would take me constantly all night, since I was hard all night anyway. Don't think about trying that either. It took the whole group of them to hold me down and I won't be able to keep from fighting you. It's a werewolf dominance thing; I can't just submit. I- Ah!" I gasped, as a pain hit me deep in my groin. It was like someone had lit my groin on fire and was stomping on it to put the fire out. I curled up in a ball, knowing that the pain would continue for most of the night no matter how many times I came. My body knew the difference between masturbation and sex and wouldn't give me peace until I had mated.

"Trowa! What's wrong?" Quatre asked, inching closer to the bars.

"Get back!" I barked, uncertain of how strong the bars really were. Quatre, thankfully, stepped back and I turned my attention to the battle raging inside me.

I barely even heard when Quatre left, but my body sensed his smell fading and I could barely keep myself from lunging after him. I suppose it was too much for me to think that he wouldn't return and I couldn't help but leap at him when he did. He waited patiently until I settled before approaching. There was a blanket in his arms along with a steaming mug of some strange tea, a kind that my nose couldn't quite place. Quatre was clothed in a loose robe and I realized that I hadn't even thought of where he would go without clothes, since his were scattered in my cell, and realized that he must have sneaked into a bathroom and clothed himself in the robe.

Quietly, Quatre knelt beside me and handed me the tea.

"Drink this," he told me, "It should help you." I drank it all down, being fairly thirsty from all the activity earlier. As I finished, I began to feel odd, a bit out of it. The cup fell from my hands and shattered on the floor, but I didn't have to will to pick it up. The last thing I heard was Quatre opening the cell door, but I was too far gone to care. Whatever he gave me must have been strong, because I was out in the next instant.

I awoke feeling like I had slept a week. My legs and arms felt heavy, my mouth was dry, and my head felt fuzzy. I sat up, shaking my head to clear it, and saw Quatre writing a letter over breakfast at the little table in our room. He saw me move and looked up, then smiled at me.

"Good morning," he said, then set his pen down and stood.

I also went to rise, but found that I couldn't. I looked down to find a heavy chain around each wrist and ankle. The events of the previous night hit me and I fell back against the bed in regret and shock.

"Trowa?" Quatre asked, moving toward the bed, "Is everything alright?" he asked, but stopped before he was within grasping range. He wasn't stupid enough to try and get close to me again, I had made sure of that. I doubted that he would ever trust me again. I couldn't even look at him, I was so afraid of seeing fear or loathing on his face; so afraid he would hate me.

I heard the sound of Quatre retreating, then the sound of him pulling a drawer open, taking something out, and closing it. He approached me again, but I still didn't look at him.

"Hey," he cajoled, "Don't be mad. I just didn't want you to get away last night and I wasn't sure how that potion would affect you, or how long it would work. That's why I tied you up. I can let you loose now, but please don't be mad."

I looked at him in surprise and there was a sincere, soft smile on his face. Gently he unlocked my chains and let me free. I sat up, rubbing my wrist to get rid of the feel of metal on skin.

"I wasn't angry," I told him, "I thought you would be. I tried to rape you..."

"It was my own fault. You warned me, but I didn't listen. I kidnapped you, chained you up, locked you in a prison. I know what you are, and I knew better than to try that. I was just so scared that you would run away from me and I'd never see you again... But that's no excuse. I would have deserved what I had got if you had-"

"Don't say that!" I yelled grabbing him by the shoulders and giving him a little shake. "It's not true. No one deserves that, especially not you. Can we... I just want to put this thing behind us. I came so close to taking you when you didn't want me... it makes me feel like, like one of the mercs. I hate it."

"But I did want you," Quatre said softly, a small blush on his face. "That's why it took me so long to push you off. I thought, maybe, if I let you take me you'd forget about the whole link thing and be happy with just that. Besides, you're beautiful and what you were doing felt so good... but I didn't want either of use to regret our first time together, so I had to stop you."

"You... wanted me?" I asked uncertainly. Quatre smiled and nodded. The thought went right to my groin and I blushed. Quatre laughed and in a moment we were both laughing. It felt like everything was right again.

"So," Quatre asked in a serious voice once we had calmed, "the new moon's affect on you only lasts one night, right? So if I asked you to make love to me today you'd be the one answering, and not you werewolf blood, right?"

I nodded carefully, not sure where this was going and not wanting to bear the disappointment of assuming wrong. I needn't have worried as Quatre moved in for a deep kiss a second later, settling himself on my lap. We kissed until both of us needed to breathe so badly that we had to break away.

"Trowa," Quatre said, still trying to catch his breath, "will you make love to me?"

I nodded mutely and pulled him in for another kiss while pulling off his robe. Underneath his robe he was naked, and since I had awakened naked except for a blanket we were both naked in a matter of seconds.

We explored each other. We took our time, trying to see who could get the most reactions and who was the most sensitive. It wasn't quick and to the point like it had been before. It was relaxed, laid back, like eating together or swimming together. It was something to be done at leisure, to be enjoyed. Mouths and hands ended up exploring regions that had otherwise been restricted. Unknown places became memorized, sounds never heard before became a prize won by careful touches.

Of course, it didn't stay that way. As our arousal increased, so did our speed and we were soon moving against each other, groaning until at last, by some silent signal, we began to prepare to become one.

Quatre ended up on bottom. Again that silent language put him there, as neither of us realized until much later who was where. At the time, it really didn't matter to either of us as long as we became joined as soon as possible. I used the lotion from the night stand as lube to stretch Quatre's muscles, moving my digits in and out of him rhythmically until he couldn't stand it anymore and cried out for me. Only then did I lube myself and slowly enter his tight body. He gasped at the feeling and thrust himself down on me, alleviating the notion that I was hurting him. Soon I was fully inside of him and we were both at the limit of our endurance. We began to move together, slamming together powerfully only to pull apart and slam together again. We became one in that moment, our minds and bodies meeting to share everything and hide nothing. Our pleasure's were multiplied by feeling the pleasure and love of the other and it overwhelmed me, causing me to climax. I screamed Quatre's name as I came and he came only a moment later, screaming my name in return, milking my arousal with his climax. I managed to pull out of him and lie beside him, pulling the blankets over our two cuddled forms.

I was so exhausted that it took me a while to realize what exactly had happened while we were making love, but when I did I was overjoyed.

_Quatre,_ I called over our link.

_Hmm?_ he responded sleepily.

_Love, listen,_ I told him, smiling softly. I felt his mind realize what had just happened as he sat up, his eyes open wide. I had only a second to enjoy the feeling before the emotions returned and I winced. Quatre quickly closed our link.

"It seems that you only need to be distracted to forget about the emotions," I said, smiling at him. He smiled back, though I could see the disappointment there.

"It was an awfully good distraction," he replied, "And you seem to be getting more used to them; you didn't scream this time."

"So I am," I said, a bit surprised that I had not thought of trying to get myself used to the emotions, "Perhaps we just need to work at it a bit more."

"And perhaps if we don't let you get to such a high stage of need you won't be so desperate at the new moon."

"Maybe, but it will require a lot of work."

"All the more time to practice linking," he told me. We were both ginning from ear to ear as we settled down to get some sleep. We both knew for sure that, whatever tomorrow might bring, we were together forever.


	47. Duo46

Duo POV

I wasn't surprised to wake up with Heero curled in my arms, asleep. I was, however, a bit surprised that we were not in our own bed, but instead in a small bed behind a curtain in the medical wing.

In a second, the night before flashed before my eyes and I remembered everything that happened like it was some kind of nightmare. It was odd, then, that the thing I was worried most about wasn't the fact that I was supposed to be dead, but how Heero was. I tossed the blanket off us both, startling the heck out of Heero, who jumped and blinked sleepily at me. I ran my hands over every part of his body... okay, almost every part of his body, to assure myself that he was mainly unharmed. I ran my hand over that last part because I felt like it, and because I hadn't gotten any since the battle started and being in bed with him made me damned horny. Too bad Heero wasn't having any of it, pushing my hand away with a cheeky grin. I probably would have pushed a bit more, but my formerly forgotten wound was starting to protest.

"Are you finished?" Heero asked as I dropped back against the bed with a relieved sigh.

"Well, I wouldn't be, but this wound is making it a bit hard to grope you."

"You're not worried at all about how you survived an otherwise fatal situation, are you?"

"Eh, sure, whatever," I said, stretching until movement made the wound in my chest protest loudly. I laid back and pulled Heero back into my arms, where he belonged, ready for some sleep and snuggle time. Heero laughed, curling back into my embrace.

"Wufei managed to kill Noventa. Apparently, the soldiers we were fighting were not alive, they were corpses that Noventa had enchanted to fight for him. When Noventa died, his spells began to wear off, from the soonest one done to the last one done. Luckily for you, the soldier that stabbed you was one of the last batch Noventa created," Heero said, his voice becoming thick with emotion as his arms tightened around me, "I almost lost you..." he whispered harshly.

There was nothing I could do but hold him, rock him a bit, as he clutched me and started to cry. Pretty soon, I was crying to, remembering how close I had come to losing him. So we both just sat there and bawled like babies until we fell asleep in each others arms.

We awoke hours later, though I'm not sure how long after the actual battle it was. For a long time, we just lay there together, basking in each other's warmth.

"So," I asked quietly, "what's the damage?"

"For you or me?" he asked, smiling softly.

"You, silly. It's not like I got hurt at all," I teased sarcastically.

"I received bruises, cuts, and contusions on forty-six percent of my body, along with a sprained wrist from dragging your lifeless carcass over half a mile of warzone."

"Ah. You poor baby."

"And you managed to get a sword thrust into your chest, half an inch away from both your heart and your lung, almost bled to death in the middle of a battle, and gave me a heart attack."

"So I should be out of bed and running laps by this afternoon, eh?"

"You, love of my life, are going to endure the same amount of pampering and coddling that I was forced to endure when I was sick."

"...You're trying to kill me!" I shouted, in a mixture of both teasing and real fear. I remembered how much I had babied Heero when I first found him. Perhaps I had been... a little over zealous. Heero smiled evilly at me.

"Oh no, you're not getting out of it that easily."

"Well," I said with a lecherous grin, "I should at least get a last meal before I face my fate. And I think I want to eat... you!" I said, grabbing Heero. "Aw fuck!" I yelled as my chest decided to scream in agony. Heero waited until I had calmed before laughing at me.

"I suppose that was a good enough warning not to try anything too... physically demanding for a while," Heero said, smirking at me. Bastard. My life was going to be hell until I was healed, I could tell already.

"So," I asked, "How's everyone doing?"

"Wufei's exhausted, but Treize is working on that. Chase was scared out of his mind, but Treize and Wufei are both having some family time together to get him over that. Quatre and Trowa seemed to be having some sort of fight, but, by the sounds coming from their room last night, they seem to have made up. Dorothy and Relena are leaving sometime after next week. Relena wants Dorothy to get used to her country before getting Zechs to up their links. Une and Sally have both been pretty busy with cleaning up the war, but they've moved into the same room so they see more of each other than before anyway. Une's been sending scouts out to look for more of Noventa's troops, but none of them have found anything so we think his corpses were all he had. The construction crews around here have been working like mad. Treize wants to have Chase's coronation next week, so guests will start arriving soon. He also wanted to name you and Quatre godparents, leaving Trowa and I godparents by linkage. He'll be glad you're awake, everyone was getting worried."

"How long was I out?"

"Almost a week."

"Really? Wow, I must have really got knocked one."

"Yes, you did. And don't you ever do that to me again. You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Gee, Heero, you really do love me, don't you?" I teased, trying to lighten the mood that had gone serious.

"Yes, I do," answered Heero seriously, ruining my joke. He pulled me in for a kiss, but I pulled away soon after.

"Oh hell no! We do not cruelly punish the ill! You know I can't do that right now but you tempt me anyway! You're bad, Heero!"

"I know," he said, smirking as he kissed me again. Why fight it?

We parted soon and Heero, thankfully, insisted I go back to sleep. Which was a plan I wasn't adverse to, since I was still exhausted for some reason. My next awakening was to the sound of Heero entering the room. His arms held a tray of food and my stomach growled at the sight of it. I ate voraciously, consuming almost everything Heero placed in front of me. I felt a bit weak and made a mental note to ask Heero just how bad a shape I was in after dinner. Unfortunately, I fell asleep immediately after eating and didn't have a chance to question Heero.

The next day also consisted mainly of me eating and sleeping. Sally came in and gave me a check-up, then declared me unlikely to die in the next twenty-four hours and allowed Heero to take me to our room instead of that cramped little hospital bed. I was grateful for that, because I was still a little shook up from the battle and needed the safe and familiar surroundings of our room. I think Heero needed that too, because he took me straight from the check-up back to our room and put me to bed, not letting me out of his sight for the rest of the day.

The day after that consisted of what seemed like and endless parade of visits and naps. It seemed that the only time I was able to sleep was when some guest was finally leaving; I only woke when one was entering. Quatre was the first to visit, Trowa in tow, both looking happier than I had seen them in a while. Quatre had told me of his inability to let his barriers down for Trowa, but by the way they interacted and the small, secretive smiles they shared I was pretty convinced that, if they hadn't already solved the problem, they were well on their way.

Wufei and Treize stopped in next, physically holding back the over-concerned Chase. Once Chase was able to see that I was alright, and all body parts were present and accounted for, he relaxed. Apparently he had overheard some soldiers saying that, "Duo would never stay down for more than a day unless someone had cut off some limbs." The look on Treize's face assured me that said soldiers would be getting a lecture on watching their mouths when around children.

Relena and Dorothy stopped by briefly to wish me good health and ask if there was anything they could do, but Heero herded them quickly away, seeing that I was still weak and tired from my wound.

Une stopped in after the three had left and Sally met her here not much later. Those two, thankfully, only stayed long enough for Sally to give me a check-up and Une to brief Heero and I on the military situation, then they left me the hell alone. I was glad, because I was feeling about ready to die from exhaustion. I think Heero realized, because he let me sleep through dinner, something he didn't often allow, and saved my food for when I was ready for it.

It wasn't until the next morning that it occurred to me that I hadn't seen Master O since before the battle with Noventa. When I asked him if Master O was alright, Heero was oddly reluctant to reply. He sighed and put down the report from Une that he had been reading, then came over and sat at the bottom of the bed, taking my hand in his. I was not getting good vibes from this move.

"Duo... I don't know how to say this. Master O... he didn't make it. Noventa stabbed him with a poisoned sword... There was nothing Wufei could do."

"Oh," I said, still not really feeling the affects of this knowledge but understanding that master O was gone none the less. "Is he... Where was he buried?"

"Wufei... Master O wanted to see his brother before he died, so Wufei orbed him back to China."

"So... he could still be alive?"

"Duo..."

"I know, I know, the chances are slim, but no one saw him die, so he might still be alive, right?"

"Don't get your hopes up. If Master O had survived, don't you think he would have sent us some kind of signal? Do you really think he'd let us grieve like this?"

"...Maybe he's hurt, like I was. Maybe he needs help. I'm just saying, if none of us saw it, maybe it didn't happen."

"...Perhaps we could take a trip to China, to say our final farewells."

"Really? You'd do that?"

"Yes. I think it would be good for everyone. Wufei, particularly, is having a hard time letting go. And it would be good for Chase to see some of his father's country before he takes over this one."

"Alrig- Ow! Ah hell, that hurt!"

"I think we'll have to wait until a week after the coronation at least for your wound to heal."

"Alright, I guess."

"And we're only going if Sally clears it. If you aren't healed by then we'll push the trip ack further."

"Alright, alright. Now be quiet and let me go to sleep so I can heal faster."

The next week flew by. On the fifth day Sally cleared me for a flight attempt to see if I'd be able to fly for the trip. Sally and Heero stood on the ground as I took a ten minute lone flight before I got tired and had to come down. It didn't seem like much, but it was actually good progress, even though I had to take a nap afterwards.

The day after that was Chase's coronation. I'm not sure how other countries did coronations, but it was set up like this for Chase:

Treize and Wufei stood side by side at the front of a hall that greatly resembled some kind of chapel. Treize wore a decorative crown on his head and Wufei held a golden scepter that marked him as sorcerer though he occupied the Queen's chair. Both looked extremely regal in their decorative outfits, both made of a dark ruby material, though Treize's outfit had more gold and Wufei's included a cape. Treize was on the right and Wufei was on the left. Heero and I stood to the left of Wufei, both of us clad in our formal uniforms, and Quatre and Trowa were dressed likewise on the right of Treize. There was a deep red carpet leading to the door and royalty from almost every country stood on either side of the carpet. The crowd was squawking excitedly, like a flock of hens, but I didn't let it bother me. Not even the fact that Heero was standing an inch from my back, afraid I would fall from all the excitement, could keep me from beaming in happiness.

There was a small noise from the back of the room that silenced all the other noise instantly. The great doors swung open revealing a dwarfed-looking Chase, standing nervously outside the room. I felt kind of bad for the kid, standing there looking like he was about to faint dead away right there in front of us. I saw Tieze and Wufei share a worried look, but neither could get up to help him. He would look like an incredibly weak leader if he had to be helped through his coronation. The attending royal would give no leeway for the fact that he had never, until ver recently, been in a situation like this. They would see him as a weakling, easily frightened and overpowered, which would be a very bad impression for a leader to deal with.

A band started somewhere in the building, blasting loud trumpet music through the room. Chase jumped a bit at the loud music and stumbled as he tried not to miss his cue. The fancy clothes he was in must have made Chase feel even more out of place, but Treize couldn't allow his heir to show up in common rags. The small sword at his side kept getting caught in his feet, making Chase stumble even more, but he eventually found a rhythm to his walk and stopped looking clumsy. He seemed to have gained a bit of confidence as he came to the end of the rug and knelt, the trumpets dying away with his movement.

Treize rose regally, then took a small gold crown from a pillow mounted on a stone table next to his thrown. It was an impressive crown, small, but ancient, though I'm not really sure what family it originally belonged to or where Treize got it. Either way, it looked magnificent sitting upon Chase's dark blonde hair.

After that Treize and Wufei escorted Chase over to a large balcony, under which stood almost every peasant in the entire city, all come out to get a glimpse at their new prince. We four godparents followed behind the happy trio, acting as protective uncles to the new prince. A name which I had no doubt we would all live up to in the coming years.

From there we went to, of course, the celebration. It was a party that the palace had never seen the likes of before, so elaborate were the decorations, entertainment, and food. Which annoyed both Chase and I to no end when we had to leave early as the people who loved us didn't want us to stay up too late. Although, I must admit, it was a bit understandable for Heero to want me to go to bed, since I did fall asleep and almost drown in the punch bowl.

It was then that I realized that I probably hadn't been paying enough attention to Heero. I mean, with the planning for the coronation and everything I had managed to fill up most of the time that I wasn't sleeping for the past couple weeks. I mean, I hadn't even realized Heero had hurt his back when he was in the battle, which he revealed to me that night when helping me up the stairs. I felt really bad about not giving him the affection he deserved, especially after everything he was doing for me. I promised to correct that mistake when he went on the trip and spend as much quality time with him as I possibly could. Heero like to fly, maybe I could fly him over the ocean and show him the dolphins that always followed me when I stuck my tail in the water.

The next day Heero insisted I sleep in late because of all the ruckus the night before. That afternoon we called a meeting between us and our little group; Treize, Wufei, Chase, Quatre, Trowa, Une and Sally. We explained what we wanted to do and Treize agreed that it would be a good idea to let Chase travel and see a bit of his country and that we could end the trip with a visit to Master O's family. Quatre and Trowa both agreed to go though it was necessary for Une to stay behind and maintain control of the castle. Sally decided that she had far too many patients to leave now, but wished us all a safe journey.

And so Treize and Une began to make preparations. Wufei was left to create a route for us to go by, and Quatre was left to contact all dignitaries and alert them of our movements. I was given strict orders to rest and regain my strength, orders that Heero was determined to see that I carry out.


	48. Heero47

Heero POV

All my time after the battle was dedicated to Duo. The memory of watching that man plunge a sword into my beloved still haunts me to this very. I will never forget that look on Duo's face. When he was stabbed, he wasn't even looking at his opponent; he was looking at me, like he wanted his last sight to be of me. It told me all I needed to know bout the situation; that Duo had purposefully put himself between the attacker and me, giving his life for mine. I tried to be angry at him, but found I couldn't I would have done the same thing in his place. And I couldn't get mad at him for not trusting me because I wouldn't have seen my attacker until it was already to late.

The battle stopped when Duo was stabbed. Not to say that everyone stopped fighting, simply to say that the battle no longer mattered to me; only Duo did. I had to carry him to the medical wing. The bleeding was so bad that I almost dropped him several times, his skin became so slick with blood. There was nothing I could do for him on the battlefield, so I forgot about him; that is, I forgot about him as a person and thought of him only in an objective way. It kept me from breaking down, but made me feel like some kind of monster. I think, though, I had to be a monster at that time, to walk passed all those people who needed my help and do nothing for them. A couple times fighters fell in to me, and once a pair fell into me so heavily that I had to turn to keep Duo from falling and landing on the hard floor, spraining my wrist in the process.

Sally did what she could for Duo then put the both of us in a small room. She didn't think Duo would wake any time soon, so she made me wash up before she would let me see him. When I did see him, I was almost afraid to go up and touch him. He seemed so pale, so fragile, lying there in that bed. I feared that he would break into a thousand pieces if I touched him, but I couldn't help myself. I had to make sure he was real.

Sally allowed me to sleep in the medical wind with him that night and every night after. In truth, there was nothing she could do. I would not be removed short of physical violence, and perhaps not even then. I found that both Quatre and Wufei had been mildly injured, but I couldn't bring myself to leave Duo alone long enough to check on them. I was afraid that he would wake while I was gone and try to search for me, further injuring himself. I didn't need to worry, though, since Quatre insisted on seeing me soon after he woke.

I could tell that all was not right between the two the minute they entered the door. Quatre was pretty much his usual self, but there was something about him, some forced mirth, some energy that had been redirected my way, that didn't seem quite right. Trowa, though he barely shows any emotions at all, seemed a bit more quiet than usual, a bit more reclusive, though he did nothing out of the ordinary.

The two managed to pry me away from Duo for a bath and a hot meal. I wasn't really sure how long it had been since my last bath; the last one I could remember taking was taken right after I washed the blood out of Duo's wings, I had needed to wash it off of myself before I became sick. I admit that while I was watching over Duo I seemed to have lost all sense of time. My life was measured only in Duo's even breaths and the plates of food Sally repeatedly handed to me, time meant nothing. The only other times I left Duo's side were to bathe, to use the bathroom, and, of course, to attend Master O's memorial.

I spent much of my time while Duo was unconscious sleeping beside him. I, too, was tired from the long battle. The scratches and sprain I had gained during the battle had all been fixed, though I wasn't completely sure when, by Sally or one of her aids. I think, though that I really needed to feel Duo's heart beating against my own more than I needed to sleep.

I found my sleep beside Duo wasn't as restful as it usually was. Nightmares plagued me, of course, but there was more than that. I would wake up sore every morning, and I night a pain in my back woke me and forced me to stand and stretch the sore muscles. I wrote it off as the uncomfortable bed and made a note to tell Duo about it when he woke up. I knew he'd make fun of me for getting old, even though I was younger than he was.

Duo awoke in typical Duo fashion, automatically assuming, despite all evidence to the contrary, that I was the one injured. He made sure I was alright and managed to grope me all at the same time. I was so relieved that he was back, the same old Duo I loved with all my heart, that I could have cried. I didn't, though, because crying was difficult for me and I had found that my tears trigger a reaction in Duo which makes him want to shelter me, and I would be damned if he got to pamper me when he was hurt. I planned to pamper him until he wished for a painful death.

The fact that Duo fell asleep when I insisted that he nap told me more about his condition than I would have liked to know. Duo gets relatively little sleep and generally spends extra amounts of time eating when recovering, not sleeping. I knew when he fell back into that exhausted sleep that it was going to take a bit for him to get better, but I was willing to go the distance.

I was able to take Duo back to our room the next day and I thanked the stars for that. I think Duo might have needed that safe feelings our room provided, but I know I needed to have Duo in those safe surroundings.

I put off telling Duo about Master O for as long as I could. I was afraid that he would have some kind of fit and hurt himself, but the time finally came when I couldn't put it off any monger and I had to tell Duo the truth. I think my suggestion of a group trip to see Master O's grave was more out of fear that Duo would try to find him alone than actual want to go. When I thought it over later, however, I came to the conclusion that this trip was probably the best option for healing the wounds Master O's death had brought. It was actually a very sound idea, though I wasn't sure that I wanted Duo to attempt a flight that long, carrying me, with that healing wound. Still, I could tell it was important trip for Duo, so I planned to hold my tongue as long as Sally cleared the flight.

It was disturbing to find that, though we were back in our room, the pain in my back continued. I had thought that when we returned to our own, comfortable bed my back would stop hurting and I would be able to sleep better. Unfortunately, I was still unable to sleep and the pain in my back began to get worse. There were times at night when I would have to risk waking Duo by getting up to try and walk the pain out. That method seemed to be working less and less as the days went by. I began to think that maybe I had torn something in my back while carrying Duo all that way and decided that if the pain didn't stop soon I would go to Sally. I was reluctant because I didn't want Duo to have a reason to take his attention off of healing himself and I didn't want him to feel bad if my carrying him had hurt my back, but something needed to be done about the pain.

It was lucky for me that Duo was so tired and worried about the coronation and trip, or he certainly would have noticed sooner that my back was hurting me. As it was, he didn't notice my pain until after Chase's coronation while I was helping him up the stairs.

It was not as late as I think Duo would have liked to have stayed when we left the party, but it was by no means early. The sun was just peaking over the horizon when Duo fell asleep in his chair, heading face first into the bowl of punch some drunken royal had left at our table. I would like to think, at least I hope, Duo would have been able to extricate himself from the bowl alone after a moment of confused spasming. I wasn't about to give him that moment and pulled him from the bowl myself, ruling out any possibility of drowning. I insisted that we leave the party, something Duo moped a bit about but was too happy that no one had seen his swim to protest. I realized what he must have been feeling when Treize and Wufei sent the guest of honor to bed at the same time, but there was nothing to be done. Duo needed sleep.

Getting Duo up the stairs was a trail because he as constantly swaying back and forth, leaning on me. My back was still hurting from standing then sitting in wood chairs all day and I wasn't able to support Duo's weight. When I swayed away from Duo as he came toward me he caught on that something was wrong.

"Hey, what's that matter?" he asked as I regained my balance.

"Nothing," I dodged.

"Don't lie to me," Duo said in a tone that I knew not to mess with.

"My back hurts, that's all."

"What happened?"

"I hurt it in the battle." Not technically a lie, since I had been dumb enough to pick him up and carry him around like that.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It wasn't bad enough to bother you with." Nothing short of internal bleeding is bad enough to bother you with while you're injured.

"How bad is it?"

"Not too bad." I'm still walking, after all.

"Have you seen Sally?" Of course. I saw Sally while you were in the hospital many times, I just didn't tell her about this.

"Is it getting worse?"

"Not lately." It's been hurting like a bitch all month.

"You shouldn't have carried me all over the place like that. You could have really hurt yourself." ...I did really hurt myself.

"I was a little preoccupied at the time." You would prefer I had left you to bleed to death?

"I love you so much. I just don't want you to get hurt."

"The feeling is mutual."

"I know, but still. You don't take care of yourself as well as you should. I worry."

"You're the one that needs taken care of right now," I said, grateful that we had finally made it to the room. "Let's get you into bed."

"Maybe I could give you a back massage?"

"Don't even think about it. You're going to sleep. I'm not the one injured, you are. Now, into bed."

"Yes captain overprotective!"

It wasn't long before Duo was sound asleep, curled up on his side and snoring lightly, a sign of how tired he really was. I sat up for a while, but it wasn't even half an hour before I decided to go to bed. I had just gotten undressed and was walking to the bed when a sudden spasm in my back brought me to my knees.

The pain was so intense that I couldn't breathe. It was like a hot wire under the skin of my back connecting my shoulder blades to my tail bone and pulling them together. My back arched and I tried to gather air into my lungs but I couldn't. I couldn't even scream. I thought I was going to bend until my feet touched my head and my spine snapped under the pressure.

Then, as suddenly as it had started, the cord released, gradually letting me come out of that position. The pain faded to the dull throb that I had grown used to and the air rushed back into my lungs as I took heavy, gulping breaths. I took a minute to get my breath before sitting up slowly, cautious not to provoke another attack.

Duo was still asleep in the bed. In his exhausted state he had managed to sleep right through my attack and I was grateful that he had been spared that scene. I knew that, had he seen that, he would have gone to pieces and panicked, dragging me down to see Sally when he really should have been resting.

Not to say that I wasn't going to see Sally, because I knew by that time that it would be foolish to ignore the problem any longer. Whatever was wrong with me was definitely getting worse and could cause permanent damage if not dealt with soon. I would, however, be able to downplay my pain so that Duo wouldn't fret so much. Perhaps I would sneak out while he was sleeping, to give him even less to worry about.

It proved more difficult that I thought to sneak away from Duo the next morning. I had forgotten that I was scheduled to go on patrols with Trowa since Duo was now recovering well. I thought about trying to get out of it, since I was certain Trowa could handle another day on his own, but attempting to get out of it while hiding my reason from Duo seemed like more effort than it was worth, so I decided just to go and get it over with. I doubted that anything would happen anyway.

I was proved wrong when Trowa and I spotted a thief, an adult one who stole from an elderly man running a fruit stand in the market. The thief spotted us and tried to run for it, giving way to a chase that led us through alleys, pubs, houses, streets, and eventually into the sewer system.

This wasn't, however, the kind of sewer I was used to. I had never seen the sewers that were open; I had only been exposed to the ones kept in tunnels of large tubes. This sewer was more of a large drain, mainly one center drainage ditch the syphoned mostly rainwater away from the city. It wasn't any more or less unclean than the tubes had been, but it was more moist because of evaporation precipitating from the open water. That caused the paths we ran down to be slick with moisture, and both Trowa and I almost fell several times.

It told me that our thief was getting desperate to lose us by taking that path since he was no more adept at treading the slippy surface than we were. When the path abruptly became narrower he seemed just as surprised as we were.

It was too dangerous Trowa and I to try to run so close on a path that was only about a foot wide, so Trowa used a small bridge to cross to the other side of the canal, only falling a but behind the thief and me. Trowa's movement also had the added benefit of cutting of an exit if the thief decided at some time to try crossing to the other side.

The slick terrain the thief had chosen proved to be his undoing as the thief finally slipped and fell on the damp track. Once on the ground the thief gave minimal resistance to being arrested, too tired from the long run to do anything but flail weakly at me.

I was just urging the thief off the ground when another attack hit me. I managed to take a startled gasp before all the air was forced from my lungs. Trowa, who had been walking up from a bridge not too far down the path, ran up to see what was the matter and found me on the ground in agony and the thief casually making his way toward the exit.

The pain was, if possible, worse than before, if for no reason greater than it lasted longer. The pain blocked my sense of sight and sound and I was only aware of what I could feel. I couldn't see Trowa kneeling next to me, but I could feel his hand on my shoulder. I couldn't hear him asking me what happened, but I could feel his hands tracing for wounds. Somehow, that feeling of not being alone, that knowledge that there was someone there to help, made the second attack a little less difficult to bear.


	49. Heero48

Heero POV

I think I must have fainted, for my next recollection is of being carried on the back of a large wolf. Thinking on it later, I realized that I must have been on Trowa's back, but at the time I thought I might have been dreaming. It made sense though; Trowa and I were both tired from having run over a mile, and there was probably two miles to get us back to the castle. In his wolf form, Trowa was better able to bear my weight, though it made my ride a bit more bumpy.

The next time I awakened we were already in Sally's hospital. Trowa was standing in his human form with fresh clothes on, so I assumed I had been there for a time while Trowa went to get clothes. Sally was moving around the room, but didn't seem overly concerned with me so I assumed she hadn't been able to find what was wrong with me while I was unconscious. I was surprised to find that the other med in the room was occupied, and even more surprised to find that Dorothy was occupying it, with Relena sitting by her side.

There was a commotion in the hall and Duo suddenly burst in the door, panting like he had run all the way from the surface, clinging to the wall for support as he tried to get his breath back.

"What," he panted, "the hell is going on!" he yelled, his eyes directly on me, warring between anger and worry.

"Duo! You shouldn't be running around like that in your condition!" I scolded, "Sit down!"

"Don't you dare say a word to me! I can't believe you wouldn't tell me your back was that bad! And I thought you said you saw Sally! What the hell did you think you were doing, running around like that! You could have been killed!"

"It wasn't that bad..."

"Not that bad! Quatre said you fainted! And with a prisoner! What would have happened if he had turned on you? You bastard!"

"Duo, clam down. I didn't think it was that bad. I'm fine now."

Duo looked about to break down, but he made it over to the table where I was lying. I sat up as Duo approached me and I was able to catch him in my arms as he fell into my lap.

"Can't believe... I almost lost you... again," he whispered, his voice filled with pain.

"That's not true," I told him softly. "I'm fine. You can't protect me from everything, you know, you have to trust me to be alright sometimes." He sniffled a bit, then smiled at me.

"I know. But sometimes I wish I could."

"If you two are finished, I'd like to make a diagnosis," Sally interjected. Duo laughed, a sound more of relief than humor, and rose, stepping away from the bed. Sally stepped forward and I could tell from her pose that she meant business.

"Alright, now I need to know everything. When did this pain start?"

"Shortly after Duo was wounded."

"How shortly?"

"Three days."

"Has it gotten worse since then?"

"Yes."

"How much worse?"

"About thirty times worse."

"Where exactly is the pain."

"From shoulder blades to tail bone."

"Is it a burning sensation, a tearing sensation, or a pulling sensation?"

"A pulling sensation."

"This sounds strangely similar to what Dorothy was complaining about not an hour ago. Turn around and take off your shirt."

I did as she asked, removing my shirt and turning around. I heard Duo gasp in surprise and wondered what he saw. Sally moved for a closer inspection, her hand then reached out to touch my back. I jumped and winced as she touched a sore spot.

"What was that?" I asked, unsure of what could have caused such a strong pain from such a little touch.

"You can't see it, but there are two large bruises over your shoulder blades all the way down your back," she said, then circled two long, oval shapes with her fingers on my back to show me where they were. "It's odd," she continued, "They're the exact same marks that are on Dorothy's back. It's strange..."

"To hell with strange," Duo interjected, a frown on his face, "what are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing. I can't do anything about the bruises and I still don't feel anything wrong with the bones. The only thing I think it could be is a pulled muscle, though I don't think a muscle could cause a reaction like this. I'm going to keep Heero and Dorothy here and keep an eye on them for the time being. All we can really do is wait and hope they get better."

"Well that sucks!" Duo spats, sitting down hotly.

"It will be alright, love. I'll be better soon, you'll see."

"You shut up! I can't believe you would lie to me!"

"I didn't lie..."

"You said you had Sally check your back!"

"No, I said I saw Sally, I didn't say anything about my back."

"You- You- You! Argh!" he growled. I laughed, though I was suddenly feeling strangely tired.

"I'm sorry," I apologized, "I just didn't want you to worry while you were supposed to be getting better." Duo seemed to deflate, his anger draining out of him.

"How can I stay mad when you say shit like that?" he asked. "Get some sleep," he told me as he pulled up a chair beside my bed. I wanted to protest that he should get some sleep too, but I was suddenly just too tired.

Except for the soreness, there was nothing severely wrong with my back the next morning. I woke to find Dorothy and Relena speaking in low tones together. Duo was sleeping quietly beside me and I wondered how he had gotten in the bed without waking me. Dorothy nodded at me, telling me she knew I was awake without words, then glanced down at Relena. Carefully, as not to wake Duo, I climbed out of bed. The floor was cold under my bare feet and I was astounded to find that I was in my sleeping clothes.

I stepped toward Relena and Dorothy, my back giving me a painful jab in protest, and sat down on the side of Dorothy's bed. Relena, in a chair on the other side, nodded in greeting to me.

"I see you've noticed your change of clothes," Relena said, a small smile on her face.

"You passed out last night. Duo had a cow, but Sally told him you were alright, your body was just trying to escape the pain. He finally calmed down and said that as long as we weren't sure how long you'd be out you should at least be comfortable," Dorothy said. "He made everyone leave and even made Sally put up a screen around the bed until he was finished. He's a bit of a jealous lover, isn't he?"

"You have no idea."

"I resent that," Duo said huskily from the bed, stretching his arms over his head. I noticed that he, also, was in his sleeping clothes. "Just because you're so sexy no one can keep their hands off you doesn't make me jealous, it makes me territorial. There's a difference."

We all laughed, including Relena, which surprised me. She hadn't shown much emotion in the time I had known her, I was beginning to wonder if she was nervous around me or something.

"Anyway," Dorothy continued, "You two had better get dressed. Wufei is coming down to make sure there aren't any spells on us that could be causing this. I keep telling them it's... Ah!" Dorothy gasped, arching her back in pain. Her entire body tensed like she was being shocked and she toppled to the side and onto the floor. Both Duo and I moved to help her, but at that moment my back began to hurt and in a minute I was also on the floor thrashing in pain.

The pain managed to block out almost everything. My sight faded to red and all I could see was the color of blood. My heartbeat echoed in my ears, drowning out all other sounds. The cold floor stung against my skin and I felt Duo kneel beside me, but I could neither see his face nor hear his voice. The only thing left to me was the pain.

It faded abruptly and I found myself sweating and shivering in Duo's lap on the floor. Duo was murmuring incoherent reassurances in my ear and holding me with such strength that the muscles in his arms stood out, yet his grip was only feather light, like he might break me. Wufei was kneeling beside us and I wondered how I could have missed him before. He seemed to see that I was finished with whatever attack I was having and had turned his attention to Duo, trying to get him to calm down. I knew that I should try to help him, but I was just so tired that all I could do was lie there in Duo's arms.

I glanced around and found that Dorothy was in a similar position on Relena's lap, with Sally kneeling in front of them. It seemed from the way the glaze was disappearing from Dorothy's eyes that she was coming back also.

Duo insisted, once he had returned to coherency, on putting me to bed and giving me at least and hour to sleep. Since there was really no use in doing any tests with Dorothy and me at the brink of exhaustion, Sally allowed our lovers to put us into bed. We were soon fast asleep, the attack far from our minds as we slumbered peacefully in our lovers' arms.

But Duo and Relena couldn't, and wouldn't, put Sally off forever. They were just as anxious, maybe more so, as the doctor to find out what was wrong with us. So in only a short hour we were awakened and given over to Sally and Wufei for testing. The next few hours brought a series of tests so bazaar that I doubt any doctor had ever tried them before. While we would be doing one odd test for one of them, the other would start us on another test, making it so we were doing these weird, mutant combinations of both.

But the biggest disappointment by far was the test results. All tests came back negative, meaning there wasn't anything physically affecting us and no magic was causing our pain.

"I just don't get it," Wufei grumbled, tossing down yet another book of healing spells. "All the clues point to magic, but there just isn't any magic on them. There are traces of several spells, but nothing that's in effect. I don't know what to do," he admitted.

"There has to be something we can do!" Duo jumped in, a horrified look on his face.

"We're doing all we can, Duo," Sally interjected, "but we can't be rash about this. We don't know what's wrong, so it's very difficult to cure it. I won't even put the two of them on painkillers or sedatives without knowing what I'm dealing with."

"So you'll just let them die?" Duo yelled, his anger causing him to stand, ready to fight. I hooked an arm around his waist and pulled him into the bed beside me.

"They're doing all they can. You know this hurts them too. It's not their fault, you know that."

Duo's face was hidden from my by his bangs, so I couldn't see the expression on his face, but I did hear his murmured, "It was my fault!" before he raced out of the room. After a moment of shocked hesitation, I moved to follow him.

"Stay there, Heero!" Sally ordered, "You can't go running around in your condition." That proved to severely piss me off. I was having back trouble, not a heart attack.

"I will get him" Wufei said, then rushed out of the room before I could protest.

I spent fifteen minutes glaring icily at Sally's back, attempting to run for the door every time she left the room, which she stopped doing after the fifth attempt and three threats of sedation I knew she wouldn't carry out.

Wufei finally returned with Duo, who was looking spent and emotionally exhausted. Wufei was half leading him half carrying him as he pulled Duo over to me and helped him into bed.

"Thanks," Duo mumbled as he laid beside me. In his condition I was afraid that all that running might have aggravate his wound, but it seemed that it had only exhausted him.

"Hush. It was nothing more than you did for me during my first days here, when I believed my world would fall apart."

I didn't like knowing that Duo had taken comfort, even cried with, someone other than me, but I realized that I wasn't the only person in Duo's like. Though I couldn't help the pang of jealousy that ran through me, I realized it was petty and unfounded. Still, the balm on my soul that night was when everyone left, allowing me to curl tight against my love and let his even breathing lull me to sleep.

It did not last, however. I woke in the middle of the night that night screaming in pain, scaring the wits out of Duo and falling out of bed in the process. The rest of the night was like that; I would get to sleep just in time to wake with an attack. In the end Duo stayed up in a paranoid frenzy of adrenalin and woke me every time my back muscles tensed in preparation for an attack. It was the same for Dorothy and Relena, who had moved to an adjoining room for privacy. Sally and Wufei came to help, but there was little they could do.

By dawn I thought I would not see the sunset, the pain was so bad. I was certain that I died several times, only Duo's voice called me back to the land of the living. He made the pain almost bearable, no matter how much it hurt. I knew how much my pain was hurting Duo and for him I tried to hold on in those dark hours of dawn, but the pain was sapping my strength and my resolve. To make matters worse, the pain along with my condition was getting progressively worse. Both Dorothy and I began throwing up blood, first in tiny amounts, then by the mouthful. It signaled internal bleeding, though there was no cause. It was like our bodies had decided to cut themselves inside.

I was lying on my back when the final wave of pain hit. I found that lying on my back, oddly, helped the pain just a bit. I had to turn over when the pain hit, otherwise I would thrash for lack of something to hold onto. I was on a small bunk instead of my bed with Duo; Sally and Wufei wanted to be able to keep an eye on both Dorothy and I, though I couldn't see why since they could do nothing for both of us. Sally had stopped trying to strap me down when she realized that I was just as still and much more calm when allowed to hold myself down; it was the same with Dorothy. The ovals on my back had gone from their original blue color to a blood red that looked like I had been cut, though no incision had been made to my back.

The wave of pain that hit was so strong that I screamed, something hadn't done in hours. My alto blended with Dorothy's soprano and we belted out an agonizing harmony as the pain consumed us. The pain faded and I sagged to the bed, but I could already feel my muscles contracting for another spasm. They had been getting stronger and lasting longer. I wasn't sure how long I could take having them so close together, I was exhausted already. I glanced at Duo, who had long since given up trying to hide the tears that coursed freely down his face as he held my hand as though he could keep my soul with him by the force of his grip.

"Look," Wufei said to Sally, "Why is it like that?" he asked as he motioned at my back. "What could cause the skin to rise like that?" he questioned. I knew already from feeling the two lumps in my back that I had two long protruding lumps on my back. I wondered if they were growing and if they were going to explode open. My thoughts went to Duo's reaction to that and I quickly shut them off. Thinking of the reverse, I knew that I would not be able to handle it either.

"It's like there's something inside there, trying to come out," Sally said just as another wave of pain hit me. I didn't get to hear anymore, but I saw a look of understanding come across Duo's face. Without warning, Duo lunged out of his seat by my bed and out of my line of sight. The pain all but consumed me in those moments that I couldn't focus on him, but he returned just a quickly.

There was a knife in his hands. I guess I should have been afraid, or at least surprised, but at that time I would have been glad if he had killed me. At least the pain would have been over. I could see worry in Duo's eyes, and pain, and fear, but also courage and confidence. I trusted him to know what he was doing. I trusted him completely.

Duo raised his knife and brought it down along my back. I could feel the skin ripping as he tore a long scratch down the left side of it. I could Wufei and Sally yelling in the background, but something kept them at bay. The pain in creased and my vision danced as the extra pain attached itself to my current pain...

...and then there was this odd feeling, like stretching a limb that had gone to sleep. The pain vanished from that side, multiplied as Duo cut my right side the same way, then disappeared almost completely as that strange feeling happened once again. Sally and Wufei were quiet and, though Dorothy was still screaming, the rom seemed dead silent. Wufei took the knife from Duo and rushed toward Dorothy. There was the sound of a knife through skin, then her screams stopped too. I smiled at Duo, my first painless smile in days. He was covered in blood and I wondered how I had managed to get so much blood on him, but he returned my smile, relief clear on his face. His eyes seemed pulled away from me, though, and he turned to look at something over my head. Something wet splashed my cheek and I turned to look behind me.

Sprouting from my back was two white wings, covered in deep red blood.


	50. Duo49

Duo POV

Those few days that Heero fought against the pain in his back were some of the worst in my life, second only to the days he was on Hell, maybe not even then. The feeling of helplessness, of thinking that it was all supposed to be over then finding that it wasn't, that there was one more monster around the corner to face, was almost more than I could bear. I forced myself to be strong for Heero, because he had been so strong for me, but inside I was dying. I couldn't hide it that day I ran out of the room, guilt overcoming me for the pain that I believed was my fault, though I'm still not sure it wasn't. Wufei chased me down and, though he was no Heero, he comforted me none the less. He even managed to make me feel as though I had to let him comfort me, so that he could repay his debt to me. I think a part of me knew that he was just trying to get me to accept some support, but I let him anyway.

Quatre and Trowa only made one appearance, while Heero was asleep. While the lovers were there, Heero and Dorothy went into an attack. The pain was almost too much for Quatre, but because of their link Trowa felt it too and it caused him to faint. It was decided then that Quatre would be banned from the room until the patients were feeling better. It seemed that Trowa hadn't been able to find the courage to approach again. Not that I blamed him.

Heero was too caught up in trying not to let me forget about myself that he never even noticed that two's absence. Of course, horrendous pain can make a person forgetful. Though he never forgot to ask me if I had eaten or slept, no matter how much pain he was in. It made my heart bleed, that he thought of me instead of himself at a time like that.

As the attacks got worse, so did my mental state. Though I made sure to eat and sleep enough to please Heero, the food never set well on my stomach and my sleep was never restful. I could hear Sally saying something about stress, but we both knew where I would tell her to shove any advice about leaving Heero for any amount of time. She wisely kept silent.

I'm not sure what triggered my epiphany. Maybe it was the blood red outlines on Heero's back. Maybe it was Wufei's comment. Maybe it was knowing that Heero couldn't last much longer under that kind of strain. Maybe it was fate. Whatever it was, I'm glad as hell that it occurred, otherwise I'm not sure what would have happened.

Cutting Heero wasn't as hard as I had thought it would be. I guess I didn't even fully realize what I was doing past saving Heero's life. It made me feel odd, later, that I was capable of doing that without even thinking about it, but I suppose it was reducing pain instead of causing it, so it wasn't so bad.

Heero's wings emerged blood red, as did Dorothy's a moment later. Both were soaked in blood and bleeding heavily before they fainted from the pain and shock of seeing wings come out of their backs. Sally's main concern was getting the blood-flow from the base of their wings stanched, but it was soon evident that the cuts Wufei and I had made were healing quickly and most of the blood was being shaken of the wings, which lay limp on either side of the two new demons. Sally gave them something for the pain, now that she knew what she was dealing with, then suggested we let them rest for a while.

Once it was found that the injuries weren't bad we wrapped the wings in towels to dry them and let Heero and Dorothy sleep of their ordeals in peace. Relena and I were so relieved that we slept nearly as long as the injured two, curling up beside our lovers for some well-needed rest.

I woke early the next day and found Heero curled against my chest, his breathing even in sleep. I watched him for a very long time, feeling all the tension of the last few days drain out of me.

It was over. It was finally over.

Quatre and Trowa made a visit, having heard the news about Heero and Dorothy. Quatre said that all the pain had faded since their wings were released. Of course, I didn't need to be told that; I had forced our link open to make sure of that before he arrived. Our link had been closed through most of the battle so we didn't get distracted while fighting. I had assumed that Heero had kept it closed after the battle to keep from feeling my pain. I had never even thought it could be the other way around.

Quatre's comment, though it did nothing for me, relieved Relena quite a bit, since she was not yet linked with Dorothy. Her worry for Dorothy was just as great as mine for Heero, even though I had been a bit too preoccupied to notice her. As I looked at her then, holding the hand of her sleeping lover, she looked less like a princess than ever before. Her hair was mussed and had lost a bit of it's shine, probably from going without a bath the last few days. There were bags under her eyes and she looked exhausted. Still, the look of love and relief in her eyes made her just as beautiful as ever, maybe more.

Dorothy was the first to stir, waking slowly into a groggy consciousness. Relena and Sally took her to wash her wings immediately; the longer the blood was given to dry on her feathers the harder it would be to get out.

After another half an hour, I decided that if we gave the blood on Heero's wings time to fully dry we'd never get it off. I managed to wake Heero up part way, but it was obvious he wouldn't be moving by himself. I realized I would need some help getting my love clean.

I was only a bit surprised when Trowa offered to help. Since joining the Night Force Trowa had become closer to Heero and I, bit by itty bitty little tiny bit, but he had slowly grown closer to us. Now, many months later, it was strange to see him doing things that he never would have thought about when he first arrived.

Getting Heero up and into the bathroom proved to be more difficult than I had anticipated. When we helped Heero sit up and get his feet on the floor we found that Heero's legs couldn't support him, they kept buckling and almost sent him to the floor several times, if not for Trowa and my interventions.

What finally resulted was Trowa, to Heero's utter mortification, lifting Heero out of the bed and carrying him to all the way down to one of the more elaborate royal bathrooms in the guest hall.

We chose the guest bathroom because of it's size more than anything. It looked more like a public bath than a personal bathroom, with several showerheads all pointed so the streams of water met and merged in the middle. Trowa and I stripped Heero then stripped to our boxers and turned on the water. Once it was warm, I lifted Heero and placed him under the spray. Even though I had shut off our link again I still knew that letting Trowa carry him naked would make him nervous, not to mention embarrassed.

I set Heero down on his knees under the spray and Trowa and I, brandishing soup bars, set to work. It was soon easy to see that those wings weren't going to get clean any time soon. As a matter of fact, I'd have been surprised if we were finished any time that week. The wings had been soaking in blood for years, then had been allowed to partially dry. All the blood that wasn't caked on was layers thick and not very pleased with the idea of leaving.

Heero began to fall asleep on us, his nervousness forgotten as he began tipping slightly forward before catching himself and sitting back up. After a while Heero stopped catching himself and Trowa or I had to grab him before he bashed his nose off the floor. Finally, I got fed up and grabbed a chair out of a nearby room. I brought it into the shower and set it in front of him, the seat facing him. He seemed confused about it, but didn't bother to say anything. The next time he nodded off he ended up resting his head and shoulders on the seat of the chair. Eventually his arms came up around his head in his sleep, so that he was on his knees, leaning against a chair in his sleep. It was so adorable that I almost laughed.

As Trowa and I continued to clean Heero's feathers one by one we found something amazing about Heero's wings.

They were white. Pure white.

Now, light wings were hard enough to find. White wings were almost impossible to find, like an albino human.

Once we finished drying Heero's wings, and got over the shock of tier color, we decided that it would probably be best to take Heero back to my room. I decided that Heero and I would probably need some time alone, and, since Heero was in no immediate danger, it would be fine to take Heero back to the room instead of the hospital. When I reached our room and saw Relena entering her room I realized she had made the same decision.

I put Heero into the bed and he immediately snuggled into what I had deemed as his spot. I could see from his body language that he was waiting for me to climb in beside him, but I, unlike he, was still in regular clothes. I took a minute to change into my sleeping clothes, since it was late enough that I didn't intend to leave the room again.

"Duo," Heero said as he curled around me, nestling himself next to me as I settled into bed, "I have wings."

"Yes," I said, smiling, "I've noticed."

"I..." he trailed off, his eyes far away in an awed revere.

"You can fly," I told him softly. He was still for a second, then buried his head in my chest.

"I never thought it would happen. When Wufei couldn't help me I thought... I thought that was it. I wasn't sad, because I have so much here with you, but I was... disappointed. I..."

"I understand," I told him gently. This was all such a shock to him I was a bit worried. Still, it was a good shock.

"I love you," he said suddenly.

"I love you, too," I told him, pulling him closer to me. "I just don't understand it. Why did Noventa take your wings? It just doesn't make sense."

"I think maybe he to give us incentive to control the dragons. I was trained to obey any order, but being offered the chance to fly would have probably added a little extra enthusiasm to my mission. Or maybe he didn't want us to know that we were fighting against our own race; maybe he wanted us to think we were human to eliminate feelings of betrayal. Either way, he severely underestimated J's training. It wouldn't have mattered wether or not I had wings, before I met you I would have done anything I was told. What I don't understand is what changed Noventa's mind. I thought he wasn't going to use Dorothy and me. We were too dangerous."

"I think that was my fault. Had Noventa been able to raise able to hatch and raise those dragons he wouldn't have needed to control them by force. He would have had to capture and control wild dragons, something only a person with demon strength could manage."

"It's all so confusing..."

"Ah, mad men make no sense. I really don't care about anything other than the fact that he tried to use you, and for that he can rot in hell."

"He's already there, love, so there's no sense in worrying about it now."

"You're right. You do realize what this means, don't you?"

"What?"

"I'm going to have to teach you to fly tomorrow."

We both broke out in huge grins. Heero wore his even as he fell asleep; grinning like the child he had never been. I grinned because he did, and because it was so rare to see him so innocently happy.

The next morning I took Heero to the landing strip on the cliff face. The drop was about three miles, so if Heero should happen to fall there was plenty of time for me to catch him. Heero seemed a bit nervous, but I doubted that was unusual. I had never seen something called the first take-off, which was like a adulthood ritual amongst demons. I had taken my first flight off the ground, but I had jumped off many cliffs and mountains on my flight from the orphanage. I had been terrified the first time I had needed to jump from a cliff and fly. I almost hadn't been able to do it. Then again, there hadn't been anyone there to catch me if I fell, I was pretty sure the parents watched over the ritual and I would watch over Heero to make sure nothing happened.

"Duo, are you sure this is how it's done?" Heero asked, peering over the edge of the drop.

"Sure I am. Haven't you ever seen mother birds teach their chicks how to fly?"

"Duo, 39 of young birds don't survive their first flight."

"That's because they don't have a grade A flight instructor like me," I told him, winking and grinning like a loon. If Heero didn't get over this nervousness he'd never be able to fly. He needed to relax and do what came natural, but I wasn't sure that my up-tight lover could do that.

"Come on, love. You know, demons aren't really considered adults until their first flight," I told him. He turned to me, interested. "I guess you could call it a challenge."

The steely glint of determination shone in Heero's eyes and I could see he was determined to prove his... manhood? Adultness? Maturity? I don't know, but he was really determined to prove it, whatever it was.

"Don't think of this as a test," I told him, gracefully hopping off the cliff and hovering in the air. "Don't think at all," I suggested.

"Easier for you than me," he commented dryly. Heero stood up and took a deep breath, obviously trying to calm himself. Letting out his breath in a long sigh, Heero stretched his wings their full length, then stepped off the cliff and plummeted.

I folded my wings back and gave chase, but didn't interfere. I realized it could take Heero a minute to adjust to the feel of falling and get himself under control, but I stayed right beside him. I didn't intend to let my lover plummet to his death.

I called to Heero but received no reply and was just starting to get worried when he spread his wings and caught the breeze, slowing his fall but not stopping it. After a few more seconds he gave some powerful beats of his wings and began to ascend. I followed about a foot below him, careful not to make him nervous by getting too close, but staying near just the same.

Heero made it about half way back up the cliff before he fell. I was pretty sure he wouldn't make it back to the top, since we had fallen almost a mile and a half, and it was, after all, his first flight. It would take a while for him to build up the muscles in his wings enough to fly long distances or carry extra weight.

Heero gasped as he fell the few feet to my arms. I lost a few inches while trying to compensate for the sudden weight then continued the flight back to the top of the cliff. Heero rested against me, a light sweat on his forehead. The flight had taken a lot out of him and I figured we could both use some time to rest.

We went back to the room and rested, had lunch, and packed for the trip that we would start in the morning. It was time to say goodbye to Master O, one way or the other.

"You know," Heero said as we packed, "the chances that Master O will still be alive are slim. We may be making this trip for nothing."

"Even if he isn't alive, I think I would still want to say goodbye. Besides, I have a feeling he's still alive and kicking, enjoying some quality time with the family."

"It's not logical to think..."

"None of this is logical, love. Who would have thought I would have bonded to a slave I met in the farthest reaches of the kingdom? Who would have thought you would have turned out to be such a magnificent fighter? None of this is logical. It's... fate. I don't know how else to explain it."

"I don't know that I believe in fate."

"Just because you don't believe in doesn't make it fake anymore than believing it will make it real. It's not tangible, but it's real none the less."

"You're being silly."

"Maybe," I quipped, taking Heero's hand in my own, "but you have to admit that there's something more at work here than luck."

"I don't believe..."

"...In luck either, I know. What I mean is, there had to be something stronger at work to bring us together, to keep us safe through everything that happened. Fate."

"Maybe," Heero quipped in reply, an indulgent smirk on his face as he pulled me into an embrace, "Just maybe."

"It's fate."

The End


End file.
